Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
QUINN
If I was a test patient, I’d be immortalized in the pages of a medical journal.
No matter what we try, I simply won’t pass out.
I’m completely off my face and can barely keep my eyes open, mind you. My head swoops like I’m rolling a roller coaster and my vagina is possessed, only wanting what it can’t have, which is them.
“Stop fucking trying to break free.” Kade has reverted to speaking with the dominance I begged him to use way back when we were friends. And it’s infinitely better for my heat-addled brain and a thousand times worse for the sensible part of me trying to squash my cycle.
“It’s the cuffs,” I whisper, though it comes out like a slur.
Perhaps not, though. The three varying growls I get as an answer has my mind racing and my heat ramping up again.
I’m walking a tightrope. It’s too soon to tell if I’m going to fall into a proper heat. All these dips, full of maybe and hell no, are doing my head in.
As much as I’m suffering, they are too. I’m super sensitive to them; I can literally feel their emotions bleeding into my subconscious. After the past few hours, there’s no disputing the bonds we share. But that’s the very reason I need to ride this out, drugged and desperate.
It hasn't been an easy process. I feel bad about how riled they are, but it’s a thousand times worse if they leave the room. We’ve tried that a few times, and it works for no one.
Right now, I’m back on the fuck it train, and the first stop is getting railed by them.
All at once.
Jesus, that sounds amazing.
“That’s enough,” Aleksei barks.
I twist around to where his voice is coming from. My vision is messed up, but I could find him by scent alone, even if he was encased in a concrete block and my nose was plugged.
“We’ve tried your way,” Santiago says, and I smile up at him while I get a small wave of reprieve.
“What, then?” I ask.
Instead of answering, a hand massages my cramping calves. I know it’s Kade; his touch is easy to determine because my body relaxes like arriving home.
A part of the mattress near me dips, followed by the same motion on the other side, the combined scent of agarwood and amber flooding my senses.
And while I’m breathing through how close Aleksei and Santiago are, they unlock the cuffs.
The blood in my arms rushes back into my heart, which is hammering out of control.
It stirs another crest, but instead of struggling with the accompanying cramps and need, I get distracted by them lying next to me.
Everyone must have talked about what they’d do, because they flow like water to bundle me up in them. Their warmth smothers the flames of my heat. Their scents fill my lungs, and the peace that settles in my bones has me passing out faster than you can turn a television off.
I wake with a piercing headache.
Someone already thought I would.
A bucket is placed in front of me while cushions are gently pushed behind my back. A small press, and I lean back against them, sighing in relief when Santiago holds an ice-cold cloth against my forehead.
“When you’re ready, I’ve got some water for you,” Santiago whispers, his voice purposely close, so I don’t strain to hear him.
My hair lifts, and the movement stirs Aleksei’s scent in the air. Everything is muted, except for the drilling in my head.
“My heat broke,” I say as he places a cold pack on the back of my neck. “What time is it?”
Aleksei’s fingers find a pressure point on my neck, and the relief as he massages it is nearly instant. “Just past eight. No one is awake yet.”
I feel Kade’s presence as easily as I feel theirs, despite him being a Beta to their Alpha.
“How horrible was I?” I ask, driven on by the softer, more vulnerable parts of me.
Nausea bubbles in my stomach, not just because of my headache.
It might be unnecessary for me to worry about how I looked, but it’s a rather large concern too.
Kind of like the morning after a big night, I’m horrified I might have done or said something to hurt one of them, or more accurately, turn them off me.
Kade is suddenly in front of me. Even with my eyes closed, I recognize his energy, and he presses a kiss to my cheek.
“Don’t think bad thoughts, Quinny, it makes you squint.
Since you haven’t thrown up like we all thought you would, can you try some of the water?
And then Aleksei made you some rice porridge.
I’m not sure about the black tablets, though. ”
A small rumble of warning comes from Aleksei, but he swallows it down. “Activated charcoal. It’s a traditional Russian remedy for an upset stomach.”
I take the water, and when that stays down, I try the rice porridge. If I didn’t know my Alpha made it, and he wasn’t feeding me, I’d push it away.
My headache stops shredding my brain soon after the food hits my stomach. The water helps too. No one talks as I lie back against the pillows and drift off again.
“All right, sleeping beauty, we need to get you up and into the shower.” Santiago’s tender care is more therapeutic than any sleep or food could ever be.
Accepting his hand, I stumble up on shaky legs against him. My energy levels rise when he leads me into Aleksei’s bathroom, instead of out into mine. I trip over my own feet, and he solves the issue by swinging me up into his arms and carrying me bridal style over to an oversized tub.
“Safer this way.” He grins. “Being your guard and all, bebe, I get to make these calls regarding your welfare.”
“I can walk.”
“Maybe, but sometimes you do things for your own selfish needs. That’s what I’m rolling with. And for the record, I don’t regret the choices I’ve made.”
He continues displaying more Alpha traits than I’ve seen before, not letting me walk or decide what I want. His voice is lower than usual, and his scent so strong, it’s all I can taste on my lips.
“Bath for you.”
I get lowered, clothes and all, into a mountain of bubbles and the most perfectly warm water. I barely get my back against the tub, and he’s standing behind me with a brush, detangling my knots, massaging my head and bundling it up out of the way of the water.
“What did I do to deserve this?”
“Exist,” he says as he sits down next to the tub.
I blush under his intense stare, but also because of his swoony response.
Santiago is attractive, and it’s not that I don’t have self-confidence; it’s just, being around obviously beautiful people, I doubt myself and question whether our draw to each other is something that could flare bright, then burn out.
We sit looking at each other for a while, and I read his worries as if they were my own. But on top of that are all the questions about us that we haven’t had time to ask or even unpack.
I’m not sure where to start with any of it. “I’m sorry to ask you to help me like that. It’s not really in the job description.”
He grins as his hands dip under the bubbles, his fingers finding the small buttons of Aleksei’s shirt. “I’d argue looking after you like that was part of my… job.”
I brush over where the conversation is going. Anywhere out of Russia, and I’d be dragging him into the bath with me or sitting on the edge while he used his nasty mouth on me like he did back at the airport.
“Why are you here, Santiago, and not with your pack?”
His gaze drifts away, long enough to make my nerves build, but the megawatt grin I get when he looks at me again smothers the feeling in a second. “I don’t have a pack.”
I go to sit up, but he holds my shoulders down with a soft touch. “Let me explain.”
As soon as I lie back, Santiago shuffles down so I can see him better.
“My mom is incredible. She raised me as a single parent. She didn’t have a pack before I was born, and after I came along, it was just me and her.
Once I was old enough, she insisted I meet my father.
Not to palm me off, but he is half of me. He does have a pack and a large family.
“At no time in my life have I ever looked back and wished I had a pack growing up. I was pretty angry at my father for what he did to my mother, and that only really started to resolve itself when my mom stepped in. She stood up for him time and time again, made me see things differently, instead of me thinking he’d abandoned her.
He did, but you know how there’s always other things going on.
The important thing was that my mom was happy and still is.
“At school and during college, friends started packing up, and I was happy for them. I wasn’t fazed that it wasn’t happening to me, maybe because I knew some Alphas never do pack, I don’t know.”
He drops his hand under the water, and his fingers interlace with mine. “And then there was you.”
I go to say something, but he squeezes my hand and keeps sharing. “It was like a thunderclap in my ears. I’ve heard lots of people talking about what happens when they meet the one, and I thought I got it. I clearly had no idea, and in truth, I probably owe my friends an apology, or two.”
Santiago stops talking, only to bring a glass of water to my lips. “I can do it myself.”
He growls when my hand lifts. “No fun in that. Now, shhh, I’m going to take full advantage of the fact I have you alone. And you’re not running away, pretending we’re not made for each other.”
I smirk down at the bubbles, letting myself feel the giddy soar of what he’s saying. Keeping my gaze averted, I sink down further, leaving my eyes closed before I cheekily wave him on like I’m the queen.
Santiago’s laugh is husky and sensual, trailing goose bumps over my skin. I keep my eyes shut, because I know after one look at him, I’ll be seriously considering climbing out of the tub.