Chapter 16
Niamh
My eyes blinked open, sunlight piercing them, and I tried to sit up, but my head spun, causing me to fall back into the bed.
What in the bloody godwitch had happened to me? I felt like I’d been hit by a boulder. Every part of my body ached, weak and shaky.
“I’ve got a tincture,” a voice said, low and quiet. “It’s okay. Her body just got overwhelmed.”
“I shouldn’t have pushed her so hard,” another agonized voice said, and I recognized it: Wolfe.
Suddenly the entire morning came flooding back: the training, the way I’d felt so sick and tired but hadn’t wanted to say anything, the water, and then .
. . I groaned. I’d definitely thrown up on Wolfe.
I threw an arm over my face, burning with embarrassment.
How was I ever going to defend myself against an attacker when I couldn’t even handle a simple training session?
Wolfe probably thought me pathetic, and after this, he’d treat me like the fragile little piece of glass everyone else always had.
For some reason, that made me sad. I liked how Wolfe acted toward me—liked that he saw me have a total panic attack in front of a fire and didn’t treat me differently after that, didn’t coddle me.
“She likely didn’t know her limits,” the other voice said, “and neither did you. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
Wolfe just grunted in response.
“Well, looks like someone is awake.”
I blinked a few times, realizing Nevan stood in the doorway, a kind smile on his face that revealed adorable dimples.
His green shirt was tucked into black pants with suspenders, and I could make out the definition of his arms. He and Cillian had similar builds, though Nevan was the leanest of the three.
I pushed myself up, this time able to stomach it as I rested against the headboard. That was when I realized I wasn’t in my room . . . this one was sparse, with log walls . . . and basically nothing else.
I was in Wolfe’s cabin, most likely in his bed, and my stomach did a flip.
Nevan strode forward. “Your color is already returning. I gave you a tincture while you slept. It’s a mixture of a few magical items, but I won’t bore you with the details. It’s meant to hydrate you and give your body the nutrition it needs to feel all better after that intense training session.”
My cheeks burned at the reminder.
He smiled. “Bed rest for the day, and then you can resume all normal activities.”
“Wolfe called you?” I asked, my voice raspy.
Nevan nodded. “Sent a bird to the castle, and I could tell by his scribbled handwriting that he was in a panic.”
That surprised me. I figured he’d be annoyed, not worried. “Could you let Morton and Cillian know where I am? I don’t want either of them to think the castle swallowed me or something.”
“Sure,” Nevan said. “And if you’re not feeling well, let Wolfe know so he can send another bird, but I think you’ll be in good hands.”
I shot straight up. “I’m staying here? In Wolfe’s bed?”
Nevan frowned. “Well, you’re too weak to walk all the way back to the castle and your tower. I could try and call for a cart and horse to carry you, and then we could help you to your room. Maybe Wolfe could carry you—”
“No!” I burst out, thinking about how much I’d liked the feel of his hard chest under my palms earlier, how good it had felt as his huge hands gripped my hips. “That’s not necessary. It’s fine. I’m fine. Here. In Wolfe’s bed.”
I wasn’t sure why I’d now said “Wolfe’s bed” twice, and I once again felt my cheeks heating.
Nevan stared at me long enough that it made me squirm. “Okay, then. If you start feeling nauseous or dizzy, or your head is hurting, stop by the healer’s quarters.”
I nodded, and he left, and I slumped back, boredom and anxiety overtaking me.
I would snoop, but I was pretty sure Wolfe was just in the next room, and also, there was absolutely nothing to snoop through. The room had a bed, a wooden nightstand with a lantern on it, and a wardrobe that was half opened and looked depressingly empty.
I slumped farther down, unable to believe I was going to be stuck here all day with nothing to do.
I wanted to be back at the castle, cleaning out the library or exploring the city or going shopping.
I looked down at the form-fitting tan hose and oversized maroon tunic I wore.
It was all I could find in the little wardrobe in my room while my other dress was being cleaned.
I’d been so focused on getting to know the castle that I hadn’t made my clothing a priority.
But if I was to be the queen, I should probably find a few nice dresses to wear.
A crash sounded in the next room, followed by swearing, and I got out of bed and went to the doorway to see Wolfe bent over, cleaning up a shattered teacup.
“Need help?” I asked.
He shot up, scowling. “What are you doing out of bed?”
“I’m—Oh!” I yelped as he slung me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and deposited me back in his bed.
“You’re not to move. Healer’s orders,” he barked.
I crossed my arms, settling back down, feeling grumpier by the minute.
“Why can’t you be more pleasant? Do you always have to yell and order people around?
I can’t just sit in a room by myself all day.
” I tugged at the end of my braid, most of which had come undone.
“Besides, it’s your fault I’m here.” His face lost some of its color, and I felt a little bad.
“At least keep me company. I’m already bored out of my mind. ”
He heaved a sigh and walked out the door.
Well, that was that. I’d tried and failed, and now I was stuck here all day with absolutely nothing to do.
I groaned, and just as I let my head thunk against the headboard, Wolfe returned, this time carrying a small wooden chair that he set by the bed.
He sank down into it, almost looking comical with how big he was.
I eyed him. “What are you doing?”
The tips of his ears turned red. “What does it look like I’m doing? I’m”—he flung out a hand—“keeping you company.”
“There’s my sunshine.” I patted his arm.
He grunted, and a laugh burst out of me.
“Okay, I won’t tease since you’re being so kind. And I’m sorry I said it was your fault. I should’ve advocated better for myself.”
He swallowed, jaw ticking. “You did advocate. Many times. But I thought I knew best, and I’m sorry. We probably shouldn’t train together anymore.”
I’d been thinking the same, but now that he’d said the words, my stomach sank. “No. We just need to be more careful next time. Take it slower, drink plenty of water, and take more breaks.”
He cocked a brow. “You really want to keep training with me?”
I gave a half shrug. “You taught me a move today I’d never even heard of before. It’s simple, but now I have something to use to defend myself. To make me feel brave.”
He leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. “I can’t train you again after today. I’m clearly not meant to be anyone’s teacher.”
It was a gamble, but maybe if he understood why I wanted to be trained so badly, he’d agree.
Maybe if I told him this part of myself, he’d treat me no differently than he already did and it would embolden me, help me overcome my past. “My home was attacked,” I said, voice quiet. “By the Brotherhood of Magic.”
Wolfe swore under his breath.
The brotherhood had seemed positive at first. They were all about using magic to better our society.
They visited kingdoms around Aubergn with the idea that magic should be protected, regulated.
And they would be the ones to do it. People were sick of wars, thieves, and constant attacks because of magic.
But what the brotherhood was actually doing was far more sinister: they were plotting, planning, and infiltrating, and by the time smaller villages and people gave them control to patrol and protect their magical possessions, it was too late, and their full plan was revealed.
“They took control of our river and started demanding payment for anyone who wanted to use the water.” I remembered hearing the warning calls, shouts from the royal guard, the clanging of weapons, the screams. “I was Princess Ashami’s lady’s maid.
One of the brotherhood killed her personal guard.
We saw him shove a sword lit by fire through her heart—right outside the princess’s bedroom.
So I stepped up to protect her, except . . .”
My voice caught in my throat as it squeezed tight, as my heartbeat picked up its pace, that familiar sound of the blood rushing in my ears. I swallowed and took a deep breath to steady myself before continuing.
“Well, I did my best. We hid until we were sure the attacker was gone, then I led her out of the room and into the hallway. I grabbed the fallen guard’s shield, even though I didn’t know the first thing about using it.
” Tears pricked my eyes. “I kept squeezing Princess Ashami’s hand, looking back at her in reassurance, and then we rounded a hallway and were met by flames.
They were taller than us, not normal. It must’ve been magic the brotherhood had stolen from some other kingdom it had conquered. Either way, we couldn’t go forward.”
Wolfe sat there, head cradled in his hand so I couldn’t see his face, couldn’t guess what he was thinking.
“That’s when they closed in, the brotherhood, all of them with those maroon hoods over their heads, white masks on.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to will away the images, the smell of burning hair, the sound of sizzling and popping.
“My mother and father appeared behind them. They’d been looking for me, and they found us, but at the worst time.”
Wolfe’s head shot up, horror etched across his face.
“The brotherhood turned, distracted by my parents, so I did the only thing I could: I took the princess’s hand, held up the shield I’d taken, and yanked the princess with me through the fire.
It was hot. So unbelievably hot, our clothes and hair getting singed.
But with the shield, we could make it. We were so close to being free, but one of the brotherhood reached through the fire, wearing some kind of magical gloves that made him immune. He grabbed Princess Ashami.”
Tears welled in my eyes.
“I refused to let go of her hand, but she kept screaming at me to run. To leave her and to save myself. I don’t know who let go: me or her.
Or maybe the person who’d grabbed her had pulled so hard that we didn’t stand a chance.
But at that point, I couldn’t do anything but run.
Run and hide. I couldn’t defend myself, defend my home, defend the people I loved. ”
I licked my lips, willing my voice steady while Wolfe sat there in silence, his dark eyes full of compassion.
“So that’s why I need you. That’s why I want to train, why I want to learn. I don’t care if I passed out. What I care about is that I can save myself or Morton if it came down to it. I’m sick of being a damsel in distress.”
“Well, fuck,” he finally said, and I didn’t know why, but I burst out laughing.
I looked at his perplexed face, which only made me laugh harder.
Finally, I wiped the tears from my eyes.
“You know I haven’t told anyone that story before.
To be fair, I was by myself in a tower for three years, but since you two came and rescued me, I haven’t told a soul. ”
“Why’d you tell me, then?” he asked.
“Because I want you to train me.” I studied him, watching the way his dark eyes flashed with sympathy I rarely saw on his face. “And maybe also a little bit because I knew you wouldn’t make a huge deal out of it, wouldn’t treat me differently because of it. Well, I hoped at least.”
He sighed heavily. “I’ll keep training you.”
Relief swept through me. I hadn’t realized how much I was worried about it until Wolfe agreed. Suddenly, my eyes felt heavy, and I lay back down. “I think I’m going to rest now.”
He nodded and stood, walking toward the door and hesitating. “Thank you. For sharing that with me.” Without another word, he walked out, the door slamming shut as he went outside, and I fell into a deep sleep.