Chapter 18
Theo
Everyone in here must think I’m a madman.
After the suspension-debacle, I knew I couldn’t go straight home. She’d be there, and would wonder why I’d come back so early. I needed to vacate and find somewhere to entertain myself until the timing’s matched up. Screw it, I needed somewhere to hide. I’d pulled into Costa and decided to consume as many cups of coffee as I could handle, (I had a feeling I wouldn’t be having a restful sleep tonight anyway). I’d turned my phone on Airplane mode, just to avoid any potential altercations with Astrid in case she somehow found out before I got home. I was relying on Yaz not being a blabber mouth, but then I quickly remembered, she thinks I’m Astrid. She’s going to want to support her friend and check she’s okay. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’d already contacted her. But man, I was bored. You don’t realise how much of a lifesaver a phone can be until you’re forced to be without one. I’d been sitting here for well over an hour, reading the same magazine that someone had left on the table, over and over again. The family sitting next to me must think I either can’t read properly, or I have an extremely short term memory. Checking my phone for the umpteenth time, I saw it was now 3:00pm, I could get away with leaving now. I’d just take a diversion or something. Swallowing down my third espresso, I stand up and head out the door.
After about a 10 minute diversion on top of an already 15 minute journey, I pulled up outside our house at around 3:25pm. That seemed feasible. I could just say the cleanup didn’t take as long. Deciding to quickly turn my phone off Airplane mode, I’m suddenly welcomed with a mass of missed calls and texts…all from Astrid. I swear that there was honestly nothing scarier than a list of missed calls from your girlfriend. She knew . I could feel it in my gut, well, and see the fury lathered in her texts.
Astrid: YOU’VE GOT ME TEMPORARILY SUSPENDED?!
Astrid: I can’t fucking believe this
Astrid: Actually, I can, because you just can’t be trusted to do anything!
Astrid: Turned your phone off because you’re scared are we?
Astrid: Theodore Michael Jessop, if you don’t call me back right now, you best believe that I will make missing posters and ask everyone in town if they’ve seen you .
This girl was absolutely batshit crazy. I’d made a mistake, but she always went from 0-100. She hadn’t even let me plead my case yet. Granted, I hadn’t given her much of a chance to let me do so, but still.
Inhaling a large breath, praying that it wasn’t going to be my last. I get out of the car, and await my fate.
◆◆◆
With a shaky hand, I open the door. I didn’t even need to use a key; she’d left it unlocked. This was when I knew that she was definitely pissed, she never left the door unlocked. She was always terrified of thieves and potential murderous house invaders, so the fact she left it unlocked today proves she’s been waiting for me to arrive. I wouldn’t be surprised if she greets me with a pitchfork and angry mob at the ready. As I enter the kitchen, I notice a dark figure sat with its back to me at the table. In true Bond-villain style, she shifts her body around to face me. I’m fully expecting her to say, “I’ve been expecting you.”
“WHAT THE FUCK THEO!” she shouts at the top of her lungs. Okay, definitely not a Bond Villain then. “Do you care to explain yourself? Why have I been suspended for a month?!”
Twiddling my thumbs and peering at the floor, as if I were waiting to go to the headteachers office, I finally garner the courage to reply.
“Astrid, I’m so sorry. Honestly, you know I wouldn’t have done it on purpose. I tried really hard to follow your plans and the morning actually went kind of well!” I insist, pathetically.
Her frown doesn’t budge, “Save it. Tell me what happened Theo. I need to know.”
“Uhm,” I gulp, “Well, I’d started doing the maths lesson, as you planned, when one of the kids in your class, Jonah? He started being really disruptive. He was throwing the toy crabs around at Lucy. I was calm initially and told him that he needed kind hands. But then, he started lobbing them at me, and I told him that if he didn’t stop, he wouldn’t get Golden time.”
I flick my eyes over to her, her expression still tamping.
“Anyway, he didn’t take kindly to this at all. He got up, kicked me in the crotch, smacked me on the face, ripped off my pirate hat, and started parading around the room and managed to convince all the others to get up and join him.”
She crosses her arms now, shaking her head at the thought.
“He kept laughing hysterically at me, and then to top it all off, he then asked if I was pregnant, and I just lost it with his attitude. So…I might have shouted at him. ”
Her eyes widen now, “What did you say?”
“Uhm- well- I might have called him a little Ginger Shit and told him to sit his fat ass back down on the carpet…”
I swear she turns pale. But then…oh god. The nail biting, here we go. I'm surprised she had any nails left at this point.
“So, you’re telling me that not only did you call one of my 4 year old children, fat, but also a little Ginger Shit , in front of the headteacher?” I don’t miss the passive aggression in her tone.
I grimace, “Uhm…yes.”
“I can’t fucking believe you.”
She rubs her forehead now; I couldn’t quite tell what was going to happen next. She looked almost exhausted, like she couldn’t be bothered to argue any further.
“So Deborah has suspended me for a month? What’s the catch?”
She appeared to be conversing normally, and I didn’t want to take it for granted. “You’ll have to do another observation after that month.”
Sticking her tongue into the side of her cheek, she responds, “And if it doesn’t go well again?”
Trying not to reach her gaze, the heat rising through my cheeks, I say, “…then she said in no uncertain terms, that -uhm- you’ll be fired. ”
My body physically prepares for it, for her to unleash the beast. I knew she’d be absolutely fuming at the prospect of losing her job. I’d close my eyes, and take it. But to my surprise, she doesn’t scream or shout. She walks out of the room, only to return a few seconds later with her laptop. Perching herself down on the chair, she opens up Google and starts frantically typing.
“What are you doing?” I ask quietly, making sure not to crowd her.
Not even turning around, she replies, “What we should have done as soon as this mess started, I’m going to find Darla.”