Chapter 28
Enid
We lay on our backs, stretched out on soft, mossy grass as we gazed up at the blue sky. Puffy clouds rolled by, all different shapes and sizes.
“Tea or coffee?” Nevan asked.
I wrinkled my nose. “Are you daft? Definitely tea.”
He snorted.
I’d never had coffee until this city landed on my bog, and then I’d decided to try it one day. It had tasted bitter and utterly disgusting. I’d almost spit it out everywhere.
“Tea is soft and subtle and delicious. That coffee you all sell tastes like dirt.”
He laughed. “It also keeps me awake.”
“I take it you prefer coffee?” I asked.
“I’ve never really had good tea.”
“Then I’ll make you some,” I said. “And we’ll see which one you prefer.”
“Will it keep me awake?” he asked.
“There are teas that can give you energy boosts, but mine are supposed to calm you.”
“That’s a pass,” he said.
“You’re insufferable.”
“I think you like it.”
I did, unfortunately, but I’d never admit it.
“Why do you like plants so much?” He rolled over, propping his head in hand, his hair still wet and curling at the ends. “Or this bog?”
I folded my hands on my stomach. “You’re asking a lot of questions today.”
“Well, I almost died, so I think you owe me a few answers.”
I snorted. “You did not almost die. You were perfectly safe the whole time.”
“It didn’t feel that way when my head was under water and I saw my life flash before my eyes.” He raised a brow. “So?”
I wasn’t sure how to answer this question without outright lying. I could make something up, but like the previous time I revealed parts of my history to Nevan, I didn’t want to. I wanted to give him as much of the truth as I could.
I wasn’t going to ruminate on the reasons why.
“If that’s too personal of a question . . .” Nevan started before I cut him off.
“I think I was born with this fascination with the weird, the different, the ugly.” I swallowed. “I was born with green skin, for godwitches’ sake.”
Nevan sucked in a sharp breath, and I knew I’d surprised him by mentioning my skin color. He’d never asked about it, but he must have wondered. It was what everyone wanted to know when they met me.
“My mother was horrified by me. I think they hated me from the beginning. They never knew why my skin was green, if it was some kind of defect or something they did while pregnant with me.”
That part was a lie. It was my magic. My deformed magic that made my deformed skin. Not golden, copper, ebony like all the other godwitches and demi-godwitches.
“I love your skin.” Nevan trailed a finger over my collarbone, and I shuddered. “Not that you need my approval or acceptance. You don’t.”
“I know what you mean.” I sighed. “I love it too. But acceptance isn’t the normal reaction to me.” I looked at the flowers surrounding us, all of them with eyeballs swiveling this way and that.
I reached out and stroked a petal, the eyes blinking. “I think that’s where my love of all this started. I was born an outcast. They’re outcasts too. Like me. But just because they’re different doesn’t mean they’re not worthy of existing.”
“Is that why you chose this bog?” Nevan asked. “As your home?”
This I could be completely truthful about. “I chose this bog because it’s secluded. I figured no one would bother me here, and I could live out my days in peace.”
I turned to look at Nevan and found he was already staring at me, gaze so impossibly soft it melted me. An emotion I couldn’t understand flashed in his eyes, and then it was gone.
He was silent for a moment, then said, “I want to show you something tomorrow. Do you think you could come on a house call with me?”
“A house call? To see a patient?”
“Mm-hmm.”
He didn’t elaborate any further, and I wondered what he was up to, but I trusted him. He wouldn’t ask me to come if it wasn’t important.
“Okay,” I said.
Even if our relationship was fake, I couldn’t deny how good it felt to let someone into my life like this. The truth of it was that I was starting to crave his time, his attention. I was actually starting to look forward to our dates rather than dread them.
I wondered what it would be like after I broke up with Nevan, and I immediately shoved that thought to the farthest reaches of my mind. I couldn’t go there. Not right now. I just wanted to enjoy this. Enjoy him.
He pulled me into him, and I rested my head on his chest.
His heart thumped like a steady drumbeat. I’d never heard anyone’s heart before, never been close enough to anyone to lay my head on their chest. Ambrose and I certainly never cuddled. We had sex and maybe said a few words to each other before or after, and then he was gone until the next month.
I’d never craved more than that.
Godwitches, I hoped I knew what I was doing with Nevan.
I swallowed back my fear, eyes growing heavier and heavier, and my last thought before I sank into sleep was that I never wanted this day to end.
* * *
I awoke to my flowers swatting my cheek with their leaves, all of them bent over me, their eyes widened in alarm.
“Ow,” I said groggily, looking over to see Nevan still fast asleep. “Stop that.” The flowers straightened, eyeballs turning and staring at something in the distance.
I rose and crouched behind their tall stems, parting them and trying to see what they were warning me about.
“Where could the bitch be?” a voice yelled, and I stiffened.
It was those damn humans again. Even more of them this time. They carried blazing torches and walked across the marshy land on the other side of the channel.
“If she was dead, we should’ve found some evidence by now,” one of them said. “Bones, blood, anything.”
“Not if she died years ago,” someone else said.
Bald Man sniffed. “I don’t think she’s dead. Her whole damn cottage disappeared. What does that sound like to you idiots?”
Broken Nose crouched, swiping a finger along the water’s surface. “I think we all know what’s going on here. She’s used some kind of magic, which she shouldn’t be able to do.”
“We’ll have to tell them about this,” Bald Man said, swiveling around and swinging his torch. “They’ll want to know that an entire cottage disappeared.”
I stiffened, wondering who had this sudden interest in me. It could’ve been their overlords . . . or it could be someone more sinister . . . like the brotherhood.
Broken Nose scratched his head. “You sure you want to tell them about this? We could just lie, get some random bones and say they’re hers.”
I snorted.
Bald Man scowled. “They’re not idiots, and if she’s got control over some kind of powerful magic, they’ll want it.”
“Maybe,” Broken Nose said. “Or maybe we should take that magic. Why shouldn’t we? If she’s found a way to make her cottage and bog invisible, that’s powerful. That’s something we could use.”
A few of the others murmured their agreement.
I rolled my eyes. If they were after this magic, they’d have a hard time getting it. Unless they wanted an entire city to land on their village. From experience, I could tell them they absolutely did not want that.
The nitwits wandered around a bit more, probably looking for my remains, but I didn’t dare cross the barrier of Fairwitch to confront them today.
I bit the inside of my cheek, knowing that if I were alone, I wouldn’t hesitate to scare them off. To use my magic. But I didn’t want Nevan to see that side of me, the monstrous side.
And that was just another reminder that I could never be my true self with him, that this was all an illusion. Same as it was with Ambrose.
The men disappeared, probably going back to their village idiots to report their findings. I sighed and lay back down next to Nevan, snuggling into him and holding him just a little bit tighter while I still had the chance.