Chapter 24
twenty-four
PATRICK
“ Hey , spud. Can you get your bag from your room and then we can head out?”
Lottie stands at the bottom of the stairs, with a scowl that shouldn’t look cute. She lets out a tiny huff before running up the steps to her room without a word, clearly mad at me still. I didn’t get home until 3:00 a.m. after dropping Jo off at her apartment, and even then, it took me hours to fall asleep. Thoughts of Jo played on repeat. Her taste. Her sweet moans. Her .
I was so pent up and only managed to find sleep after replaying the night’s activities over in my head and coming all over my stomach.
Jo is turning me back into a horny teenager.
When Lottie stays at Carrie’s , she likes to call me in the mornings to tell me about her dreams, even though she doesn’t remember them half the time. It’s my favorite way to start the day, but today, I slept through the call and the dad guilt is coming in strong.
“ Did you have fun last night? She said you had a girly sleepover planned,” I ask Carrie , who is standing by the front door holding Lottie’s coat and shoes. Friday is her day with Lottie , but I asked if I could take Lottie out today after school, wanting to show her some of the ducklings at the park.
“ I mean, if watching Tangled three times and her stealing all the popcorn makes for a good sleepover, then yes, we had a great time.” She laughs and shakes her head. “ I asked if we could watch something else, and she told me it was ‘her turn’ to pick. I tried to explain it’s always her turn, but apparently you pick the movies at your house?”
“ Yeah , you’ve been played, because it’s always her night to choose when she’s with me too. Tangled , huh?”
“ Her current Disney princess obsession, apparently. When I asked her why, she said it reminds her of her new best friend, JoJo .” She tilts her head, her tone curious. “ Who is this friend?”
I could lie and say it’s a teacher from her school, but I’m sure Carrie will work it out eventually. “ Just George’s daughter, Johanna .”
“ Just George’s daughter ? Really , Patrick ? God , men are so dense sometimes.”
“ I —she is George’s daughter.” I take off my baseball hat to scratch my head, feeling like I’m on the wrong side of an interrogation suddenly.
She walks up to me, places a hand on my shoulder, and looks me right in the eyes. “ Patrick . You might not have shared much over the years, but don’t be an idiot. We both know she was never just anything.”
Carrie disappears upstairs to check on Lottie . I’m left there in the hallway, speechless at her observation. Here I was thinking it was only my brothers and mom with suspicions about Jo and me. Carrie knows about Jo from family get-togethers she’s attended, but clearly my attempt at hiding the truth was futile.
Pulling out my phone from my pocket, I unlock the screen and type out a message.
Patrick: Hey, hope you got some sleep before your shift today.
Her reply comes instantly, and I feel like a teenage boy texting his crush—which, fifteen years ago, is exactly what I was.
Johanna: The 4 hours I got were good, I’m dead on my feet now though. I have a lot of regrets about working a double today.
It’s almost midday on a Friday , no doubt in the middle of the lunch rush. This is the earliest we’ve seen tourists flock to the town, and I’m not complaining, because it’s the first time in months we’ve experienced such busy afternoons.
Before I can respond, another text from her comes through.
Johanna: Booth is giving me a look *side eye emoji*
Fucking Booth .
Patrick: If it makes you feel better, I have to entertain a 4-year-old on only two hours sleep.
Patrick: Also, I haven’t told him anything. I swear.
Johanna: I don’t think he needs to be told anything. He keeps doing this weird thing with his eyebrows.
Johanna: What are we gonna do about the cameras?
Fuck . I didn’t even think about the security cameras at the bar, and I hope to god Lenny doesn’t check the footage. Lottie won’t be happy about being dragged to a bar before the park, I’ll just make it up to her with sugar and watching Tangled as many times as she wants. I totally get the infatuation about women with long blonde hair.
Patrick: Leave it to me. Can we talk next week?
I tap the side of my phone in anticipation, waiting for her response. When I drove us back from the bar, I felt intense relief that we were on the same page. I know I can’t rush for answers, and I need to set some boundaries where Lottie is involved. Slow and steady, it’s how this needs to go.
Johanna: How about Tuesday?
Patrick: Sounds good.
“ Daddy , why don’t you have a girlfriend?”
I almost choke on the bite of ice cream at Lottie’s question. It’s harmless, but my child only has one volume setting and we’re sitting in the middle of the park.
As I suspected, when I told her we had to take a detour before heading to the park, she laid on the guilt thick. It didn’t matter that I told her we would only be twenty minutes, because twenty minutes is a lifetime to her. Her frown turned upside down when I promised her ice cream, though.
I paid Lenny one hundred bucks to hand over the security footage, and I respect that he didn’t question why I needed it.
It’s a warm day, the sun is shining on us from our spot on the grass, watching the ducks paddle around in the small lake in front of us.
“ Why do you ask that? ”
“ Nora’s mommy and daddy don’t live together. Her daddy has a girlfriend, and she says it’s like having another mommy.”
It’s a fair observation from her, and something I should have seen coming. I know Carrie has been on a few dates over the years, and introduced one boyfriend to Lottie before they went their separate ways. My last girlfriend was in my freshman year of college and it didn’t last long. I’ve never introduced anyone to Lottie , but it’s hard to do that if you don’t go on dates.
I attempt to change the topic and point to the lake where some ducks are diving under the water. “ Hey , did you see that one?”
She takes a few licks from her chocolate-chip ice cream that’s slowly melting down her fingers, but the scrutiny in her eyes makes me nervous. She’s obviously been spending too much time with my brothers.
“ I’m gonna find you a girlfriend,” she declares, tone final.
I lean over and wipe the melted ice cream dripping from her chin. “ I don’t need a girlfriend, spud. I have everyone I need in my life. You , Grandma , your uncles, and Aunty .”
“ And Poppa George !” she says excitedly. George has played a huge part in Lottie’s life since the moment she was born and loves Lottie like she’s his very own grandchild.
“ How could I forget Poppa George .”
“ Is Poppa George a daddy?” she asks and nibbles on the waffle cone.
“ He is. He has two little girls, Johanna and Harriet . You know Johanna , or JoJo as you call her.”
She gasps, hand dropping to my arm in a sticky grip. “ He’s Rapunzel’s daddy?”
Chuckling at the number of nicknames she has for Jo , I nod. “ He is, yeah.”
“ I like her hair.”
She looks thoughtful for a second and then jumps to her feet. Her mouth gapes open like a goldfish, and I gape right back at her, which makes her giggle. I think she’s past trying to play matchmaker, but as always, this child keeps me on my toes.
“ JoJo should be your girlfriend,” she singsongs, hands me her ice cream cone, skips over to the swings, and calls me over. Leaving no room for debate.
I dump our cones in the trash and walk to where she’s bouncing up and down.
“ Would you like it if Daddy had a girlfriend?” I ask her. I drop to her level as I grab a wipe from my backpack and clean her sticky fingers and mouth, before helping her in the seat of the swing.
“ Uh -huh. I think it would make you happy, and I like it when you is happy.”
Well , shit. I can’t argue with her on that logic. She has no idea that her innocent proposal was once a dream younger me wished would become my reality. And present me sees it within touching distance.
“ Daddy is so happy when he has such a sweet daughter like you.”
“ I know, but like, extra happy. Like when Uncle Boo makes new friends with the other mommies when he picks me up from school.”
Ignoring the fact that Booth has been using her to pick women up, I stand there in the middle of the playground, baffled at how insightful my four-year-old is. That even she can see that something has been missing from my life.
“ Daddy ?”
“ Yes , sweet girl?” I look at her angelic face.
“ Can you stop standing around and push me, please?”