Chapter 39
I don’t bother looking up from my coffee. Ryan’s been giving me shit since I came out of his guest room an hour ago, and he shows no signs of stopping—not that I really mind. It’s nice getting to see my best friend in the flesh for once.
Tours always take it out of me, no matter how long they are I’m always dragging by the second week and any day off is spent doing absolutely nothing. Getting to spend a day off in the comfort of a friend’s place is an opportunity I never pass up.
“On stage. In front of thousands of people.” Ryan laughs, sinking deeper into the leather couch and shaking his head with a grin that looks almost proud. “Telling the entire world you’re in love.”
Ryan’s sprawled across the sectional in a faded Boston Wraiths hoodie that’s seen better days, looking exactly like the guy who used to play ding-dong-ditch on his neighbors’ house.
His apartment is spacious, open-concept with floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the city, clean lines and comfortable furniture.
Nothing over the top, just comfortable, just…
Ryan. It’s the kind of place that comes from years of professional baseball paychecks managed well, but never losing sight of who you really are.
“And I got a front row seat,” he continues. “Backstage to see my best friend pour his heart out to a room full of strangers.”
I squint. “It wasn’t—”
“Beckett.” His voice softens, losing the teasing edge as he sits up, elbows braced on his knees. “I’m happy for you. Seriously.”
The familiar warmth spreads through my chest, the one that hits me every time I think about Madison. Just two more weeks and I’ll be back with her.
“Thanks,” I manage.
“I can’t wait to finally meet her.” Ryan smirks. “This woman who got Beckett Stone to settle down.”
“Well, you should clear your calendar for the end of April and come visit us,” I say, aiming for nonchalance and failing miserably. “Baby’s due then. You can kill two birds with one stone.”
Ryan’s response is immediate, earnest. “I’ll be there.”
In the silence, I take the opportunity to study Ryan.
Something’s off, has been since December.
The smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes and he’s tapping his thumb against his knee in a rhythm that suggests restlessness rather than excitement.
This isn’t my best friend at his best. This is Ryan running at seventy percent and trying to convince everyone he’s fine.
“You okay?”
“What?” His brows pinch. “I’m fine. Why?”
I don’t buy it. I’ve known this man practically my entire life and I know what he looks like when he’s happy, truly happy. His whole body seems to vibrate with it, but right now it’s like he’s folded in on himself—contained, careful.
We’ve talked. I’ve heard the change in his voice, but seeing him…it’s hard to ignore.
“Harborview,” I say. It’s not a question, but it’s enough.
“What about it?” Ryan reaches for his coffee, refusing to meet my eyes.
“You’ve been different since you went back.” I lean forward, lowering my voice. “Is everyone okay? Melissa? Your parents?”
“They’re fine.” He lifts his gaze to mine, meeting me without question. “It’s not important, not right now.”
I open my mouth to push harder—to remind him I’m here for him no matter what—when my phone buzzes on the coffee table, the screen lighting up with Ian’s name.
That’s not unusual—we talk regularly, checking in about everything going on there—but it’s two o’clock on a Wednesday afternoon. Ian and Madison should be at the inn.
“Sorry,” I say, already reaching for my phone. “It’s Ian.”
The corner of Ryan’s eyes tilt and he gestures for me to take it. “Go ahead.”
I swipe to answer, pressing the phone to my ear. “Ian, what’s up?”
“Beckett.” His voice is flat, stripped of its usual easy warmth and my hairs stand on end. “Someone was in the house when Madison got home.”
The apartment goes silent. Or maybe it’s me, my ears ringing, my vision narrowing to a pinprick.
“Aiden’s already en route. We’re gonna get her out, but I knew you’d never forgive me if I didn’t tell you.”
“Ian—”
“I have to go—” He pauses, the line fills with static and something sounds in the background, but I can’t tell what. “We’re going to get her out safe.” And then the line goes dead.
I stare at the phone in my hand and the screen goes dark, reflecting back a face I don’t recognize—pale, frozen, eyes wide with a terror so complete it feels like drowning.
Madison.
Shepherd.
The words repeat on a frantic loop in my head. Someone was in the house. Madison walked into God knows what, alone, pregnant, and I’m four hundred miles away sitting on Ryan’s couch while he makes fun of me.
I was counting down the days until I could hold her again, until I could feel that little nudge hello. Now—
“Beckett?” Ryan’s voice sounds distant, like I’m underwater.
I can’t answer. My hands shake, my whole body locked in place, paralyzed by the weight of what might be happening to her—to them.
I’m not there. I didn’t protect her.
I never protect the people I love.
My parents. I was behind the wheel that night and I couldn’t stop it, couldn’t save them.
And now Madison and Shepherd.
“Beckett.” Ryan’s hand closes around my wrist, grounding me. His voice is sharp and it cuts through the fog. “What happened? What’s wrong?”
I force the words out, each one tasting like ash. “Madison’s in danger.”
Ryan’s face goes white, his eyes widening as he processes the words. For a second he just stares at me, his breathing going shallow. Then he straightens, his jaw setting in a line I recognize from years of watching his determination and grit.
“Okay,” he says, his voice steady. “Okay. Let’s get you home.”
My voice sounds strange to my ears, hollow and far away. “It doesn’t matter what I do. I’m not there. I wasn’t there when she needed me.”
“Beckett.” Ryan’s voice cracks like a whip. “Snap out of it. Sitting here in a stupor isn’t helping Madison.”
I blink at him, dumbfounded.
He leans forward, planting a hand on the back of my head to make me focus on him. “You’re exactly where Madison told you to be. You left Ian there to keep her safe, but none of that matters anymore. All that matters is how you react now.”
Indignation flares hot and sudden in my chest, burning through the ice. I want to yell and rage, to tell Ryan he doesn’t understand, but the feel of my phone vibrating in my hand stops me.
Wyatt’s name flashes across the screen this time.
Without thinking, I answer and press the phone to my ear. “Wyatt?”
“Beckett.” Wyatt’s voice is calm, controlled, but I hear the tension underneath it—the fear. “I was with Aiden when he got the call. They’re going to get her out. There’s no other option.”
I close my eyes, praying he’s right. They have to get her out. I can’t survive losing my family again.
“But right now, I’m focused on getting you home. You need to be here when she’s safe again.” His words crack on the word safe and he has to pause, take a breath. “I’ve got a buddy in Boston. He’s already gearing up to fly you home. All you need to do is get to the airport. We’ll handle the rest.”
“Okay.” The word is barely more than a breath.
“Beckett.” Wyatt’s voice softens, emotion swelling in his words. “We’re going to bring her back to you.”
I nod, knowing he can’t see me, but I don’t have the words. My hands have stopped shaking when I pull the phone away from my ear. The fog has cleared from my head enough to move, a single thought running through my mind: get to Madison.
Ryan’s already on his feet, pulling his keys from his pocket. “I’m with you.”
I don’t answer. I walk toward the door, my phone clutched in my hand like a lifeline. Someone will call when they have news, when they have Madison safe again.