Chapter 64 Bahira #2
“But you said Nox and Rhea announced their engagement at the Autumnal Ball,” I counter, watching as Haylee leans over to say something to Nox ahead of us. “The only precedent this sets is that Nox can apparently propose to two women.”
“It’s the way Kallin framed the betrothal,” my mother says, turning to face me.
“He called Rhea a mistake. This paired with the rumors that have made their way outside the palace walls about her leaving him and Barron’s absence, he’s effectively ensured that when Rhea returns, she isn’t met with excitement. ”
“He wasn’t wrong when he said that the people know Haylee, either,” my father adds on, bringing my mother’s hand up to his lips.
He kisses the back of it as their steps slow, their carriage coming into view.
“She has been around the palace since Borris took over as her guardian. She’s made herself known outside of it too. ”
That was true enough. Haylee had woven herself not only into the community but our own family as well.
From the very beginning, Haylee’s life had been leading to this moment, and whether she always wanted this or was simply set on this path by her uncle, it doesn’t matter.
Because at some point, she decided that the power she would gain from becoming queen was worth the cost of whoever it hurt to claim it.
If she is willing to accept those casualties, what else is she capable of? Could she be the mole we’ve been looking for? The thought alone makes me cringe, and I pick up my pace until I’m at Nox’s other side just as they are about to reach the royal carriage.
“We need to talk,” I blurt, garnering both of their attention.
“Bahira! Was it not a lovely ceremony for your brother—”
“Shut the fuck up.” My brashness draws a few curious glances in our direction, but I’m beyond the point of caring.
I wait for Nox to meet my expectant gaze, nearly gasping from shock when he finally does.
Pink colors the whites of his eyes, the bruising beneath them the darkest I’ve ever seen.
The normal glow of his skin inherited from our father is dimmed, leaving him looking pale and as if he hasn’t seen the sun in months.
He lets me guide him towards his carriage, ignoring Haylee’s protests from behind. Once he’s inside, I turn to find her standing close, her arms folded over her chest.
“Don’t do this,” she says, keeping her voice low. “This doesn’t have to be something that you fight, Bahira. Use your talents and time on things that actually matter, just as I will do with my own.”
I chuckle, nodding my head as I hold her gaze. “Is that what you told yourself? When you pretended to befriend me? When you listened to my plights and my personal thoughts? When you looked Rhea in the eyes and promised that you just wanted to help? That you didn’t love her fiancé?”
Her eyes widen in surprise.
A bigger laugh erupts from me. “Gods, you are either incredibly naive or supremely stupid.” I lean in close, enjoying the way she tries to hold her position against me even as fear flashes in her eyes.
“There will come a day when your betrayals catch up to you, and you won’t get everything you want, but you will get everything you fucking deserve.
And when that happens, I just hope I’m there to watch you fall. ”
She scoffs, attempting to push past me into the carriage. My hand closes around her arm, fingers digging into the skin as nearby guards take a step towards us, their hands already on the hilts of their swords.
“Don’t even fucking think about coming into this carriage.”
Jerking out of my grasp, Haylee takes a step back, finally showing me her true self as the fake kindness falls away from her expression. “You will regret this, Bahira.”
I don’t spare her another look as I climb into the carriage and sit opposite of my brother. He offers me a weak grin, the weight of the crown on his head looking too heavy for him to bear. “What is going on, Nox?”
“Nothing. Everything’s f—”
“If you say that everything is fine, if you lie to me, not even being my favorite brother will save you from my fist. I’ve already punched one king; I’m happy to do it to another.” Though anger colors my voice, it only makes his shaky smile grow, a small bit of fondness in the broken sight of it.
“Please, Nox. Talk to me.” I scoot to the edge of the bench, unsure of exactly what to do in this moment but knowing that I can’t just leave Nox to whatever fate is currently being laid out for him. Not when I can see the torture of how it is affecting him, how it’s tearing him apart slowly.
For a long while, he doesn’t speak. The carriage lurches into motion, the outside blurring through the window as we journey back to the palace.
My anger is soon swallowed by rising fear, panic a tip-toeing monster that creeps along the edges of my mind.
We’re nearly home when he lets out a sigh.
It’s a weary sound, like a breath one might exhale before closing their eyes for the final time.
“I thought I could outsmart him.”
“Who?”
“Kallin. All of the council, really. The guards and whoever else they’ve employed to keep an eye on us.
On me.” I don’t speak, holding myself still for fear that if I so much as reach for him, he’ll stop talking.
Nox’s gaze is locked on his hands on his thighs, his palms facing him as he shakes his head.
“I understand that in my current state, I’m no help to Rhea, but I thought—” A rough swallow moves his throat.
“I suppose it doesn’t matter what I thought I could do because Kallin figured it out.
Or someone broke my trust. Again.” He shakes his head, the carriage slowing as it rolls to a stop.
My voice is hardly a rasp when I ask, “What did you try to do?”
When his eyes lift to mine, appearing dark and hollow, a shiver rolls down my spine.
“If I could not be the one to get to her, then I thought maybe a small team of guards could.” My heart leaps to my throat when the carriage door opens.
“They were caught only a few miles outside of Galdr by men Kallin had sent. Rhea remains in hell, and I—” His chest rises slowly with an inhale, as if the act is almost too arduous. “I will never forgive myself for it.”
I watch my brother exit the carriage and wonder about the polarity that exists with being in love. The warmth and softness of being held in its embrace and the cold, jagged danger that is born when it’s threatened.