14. Lennox #2
My dad could choose his passion, the career he’d worked his ass off for, and the empire he’d built brick by brick. Or he could choose to live out the rest of his life by retiring and leaving the work to the next generation.
It would either be him or the ranch, and I hated not knowing what he’d choose.
Dad pulled his gaze from Mom’s, taking a moment to look at each of us standing near the end of his bed.
His bottom lip tensed for a moment, and I knew him well enough to understand how difficult his decision would be.
He’d always said he’d rest when he was dead, that the devil himself would have to tear him from the saddle to reap his soul.
As a kid, I remembered being so captivated by his dedication.
Dad loved that ranch with everything he had, and he’d given more than his share of blood, sweat, and tears to turn it into what it was today.
I’d wanted nothing more than to follow in his footsteps.
I wanted to have something I was proud of. Something I never wanted to leave.
“I’m not ready to go yet,” he said, looking down at his hands. “And if that means I gotta give some things up to make sure I’m around for a little bit longer, I guess that’s what I’ll have to do.”
I closed my eyes, letting my forehead rest against Josie’s shoulder.
I heard Cleo’s sniffle from her other side.
It was the best and worst case scenario happening all at once.
None of us wanted to see our father walk away from something he loved, but we damn sure preferred that over spreading his ashes in the wind.
“I was hoping that’d be the case,” Dr. Rhodes said. “I’ll order the tests now to get the ball rolling. We’ll start in a few hours, after you’ve gotten to catch up with your family and get some food in your system.”
“Thanks, Doc,” Dad said, reaching out and shaking Dr. Rhodes’s hand.
“Just doing my job,” he said before heading toward the door. He stopped and tapped the frame. “Keep it quick in here, though. I’m already breaking the rules by letting everyone in here. Fifteen minutes, okay?”
“Of course,” Mom said, wiping away her tears. “Thank you.”
Dr. Rhodes dipped his head and closed the door behind him, leaving us all in relative silence .
“Well, that fucking sucks,” Dad said, sinking back into his pillows.
For the first time in twelve hours, I laughed. Considering where we were and the news we’d just gotten, it felt wrong but I was also wildly happy that this wasn’t the end. Josie and Cleo joined in, and it wasn’t long before everyone in the room followed suit.
“Douglas Hayes,” Mom chastised, tapping him lightly on his arm. She wiped the tears from beneath her eyes.
“Well, it does,” he grumbled. “I wasn’t planning on being forced into retirement. There’s a lot of things we’ll have to rethink. We’ll have to hire more hands, and?—”
“We’ll take care of it, sir,” Bishop said, stepping up. “We’ve got a good crew now, so it’s nothing we’ll have to rush to figure out.”
Dad was quiet for a second. “You’re gonna need some help, Bishop. You can’t run this place on your own.”
“He won’t be alone, Daddy,” Josie said. “When I get back, I’ll still run the books and schedule while Lincoln takes over the training schedule full-time.
We don’t have any clinics until the beginning of the year.
Besides, y’all were already planning on having him cover the smaller seminars. It’ll be fine.”
Lincoln nodded, placing his hand on Josie’s shoulder. “Hell, yes, it will. Like Bishop said, you’ve built a damn good team here. I’m happy to pitch in with whatever you need.”
“And I can help,” I said, piping up. I mean, I was already doing the damn job anyway. Might as well make myself useful. “I don’t have anything else going on right now.”
“Listen, I can take care of it,” Bishop said, annoyance seeping into his tone as everyone chimed in. “Nothing has to change.”
For some reason, his words rubbed me the wrong way.
Didn’t he understand that change was already happening whether we wanted it or not?
Bishop was hyper-independent. He always had been, often biting off more than he could chew.
He and Dad had gone to verbal blows with one another on multiple occasions when Bishop would take on too many responsibilities and didn’t delegate.
His dedication was admirable. I’d even go as far as to say it was one of his best qualities, but it was only a matter of time before that quality got his ass hurt. Dad always said when you didn’t ask for help, you were usually asking for trouble instead. It couldn’t have been more accurate.
Operating a ranch wasn’t an easy feat. Caring for the animals and mending fences were only a tiny part of the daily operations. Bishop and my dad worked together to make sure everything ran smoothly. There were a hundred different things they had to oversee.
I turned and looked at Bishop, narrowing my eyes. “I didn’t realize you could do two people’s jobs simultaneously.”
“Done it before,” he said, shifting on his feet. “And I can do it again.”
“You don’t have to, though. And instead of taking the help and saying thank you, you’re being a stubborn ass about it,” I argued.
“I thought you were heading back to the circuit?” Josie asked, stealing my attention.
I shrugged. “Yeah, but I’ve got plenty of time before the season starts.
” There was a good six months before my next ranking ride, and that was more than enough time to get things settled here before heading back on the road.
But I didn’t understand Josie’s question.
It was almost like she was hesitant to lean on me for help.
My sister wasn’t hard to read. She wore her heart on her sleeve, even though she liked to pretend she didn’t. Each time her mind kicked into overdrive, she had these little tells. One of which she was doing right now.
Josie worried her lip. “Are you sure?”
“Uh, yeah,” I said, chuckling. Was she serious? Of course, I was sure. In fact, I had zero hesitation. “Seeing as I’m already doing the job, I didn’t think my offer to help would be a big deal.”
“I know, I just don’t want to tie you down with something you don’t want to do.
That’s all.” Her smile was weak, which could be from any number of things.
Tensions were high. We were all exhausted and running on one to two hours of sleep.
So, why did my mind instantly twist her words into something that left me feeling bitter?
“We don’t need her,” Bishop interjected. “I can run shit just fine. If I need help, I’ll ask Lincoln or one of the other hands.”
Don’t cry, Lennox. Don’t. Fucking. Cry.
No, I wouldn’t shed another tear in front of him. Not if he was going to act like working with me was the worst thing to ever happen to him. News flash, I didn’t like it any more than he did. He was an overbearing asshole, even on the best day.
But this wasn’t about either of us, and I’d work with him every day if Dad asked me to.
I guess whatever common ground we’d found was over and done with. It was almost funny how quickly we had gone from falling asleep next to one another to standing here at odds.
“We’re already stretched thin,” Josie said slowly. “We need all the help we can get.”
Dad was sitting silently, gaze bouncing between us at the foot of his bed. I fought against the urge to shrink back when it landed on me. If Dad didn’t want me helping with the ranch, he could tell me himself.
“Lennox is the best rider out of y’all,” he said, clearing his throat. “She already knows the ins and outs of what needs to be done. Figure it out however y’all need to for the time being. If things are that bad after a month, we’ll re-evaluate.”
I looked over at Bishop. He ran his tongue along his teeth, and I could tell he was holding back that temper I was so familiar with. Good. That was something I could work with. In fact, I preferred it to whatever the hell had happened last night.
Nice Bishop freaked me out and made me feel weird things I couldn’t explain. Judging by his pinched expression, he thought the same.
“Have I made myself clear?” Dad asked sharply.
“Crystal,” I said, dipping my chin.
Bishop was still silently fuming, staring at a spot on the far wall like it held all the answers to his problems.
“That gonna be a problem, Bishop?” Dad asked, yet again. “I didn’t say all that to listen to crickets chirp.”
“No, sir. I’ve got it,” he said, rolling his shoulders back. “If it’s alright with y’all, I’m going to step out for some air. Anyone need anything?”
“No, we’re okay. Thank you, Bishop,” Mom said. “We appreciate you.”
He gave her a tight-lipped smile, avoiding me as he dipped his head and stormed out the door.
There were a million things I wanted to do, and most of them centered around tracking him down and giving him a piece of my mind, but that would have to wait.
I didn’t have the energy to worry about what our new normal would look like.
Not today, anyway.