27. Ben
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
ben
COLLATERAL DAMAGE
I don’t how I got there. I just know that ten minutes after Katy closed the door in my face—softly, apologetically, like that somehow made it easier—I’m pulling into the Winters’ driveway with my chest tight and my hands still shaking on the steering wheel.
I sit there for a second longer than necessary, forehead resting against the wheel.
Willing her to call me in the next minute and tell me she changed her mind. That it was just a mistake. I keep waiting for twenty minutes.
Nothing.
Get it together, Ben.
I don’t even make it all the way inside before Danny’s on me.
He barrels down the hall like he’s been waiting for this exact moment, skidding on the hardwood before planting his big head against my thigh. I crouch automatically, burying my hands in his fur. He leans in harder, solid and unmovable, like he’s decided I need supervision.
“Yeah,” I mutter. “Okay. Hi to you too.”
“Hey.” Ella’s voice comes from the living room. Calm. Careful. Like she already knows.
Wyatt’s there too.
He’s stretched out in the armchair, one ankle crossed over his knee, beer in hand. He lifts his head when he sees me, eyes sharpening for half a second before he schools his expression into something neutral.
That alone tells me how bad I look.
“Well…” I straighten, forcing a breath. “Since when are you two allowed to hang out unsupervised again?”
It comes out light. Too light.
Ella doesn’t smile. “Oh no.” Her voice is even. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” I ask, already knowing the answer.
“Try to joke your way out of this conversation.” She crosses her arms. “You don’t get to deflect. Why have you been acting weird, and why do you look like shit?”
Wyatt nods once. “No jokes allowed for this.”
I huff a breath. “Wow. United front. Love that for me.”
“And Declan is fully aware we’re hanging out,” Ella adds, crossing her arms. “And deeply unbothered. So you can relax.”
Wyatt grins. “It’s an HR-approved hangout.”
That gets a weak laugh out of me despite myself. It fades quickly.
“Okay.” I hold up my hands. “Fine. No jokes.”
The quiet that settles is heavier now. Real.
I move to the couch and sit, elbows on my knees. Danny hops up beside me immediately, pressing his full weight against my leg like he’s anchoring me in place.
Ella sits next to me, close but not crowding. Wyatt leans forward in the chair, forearms resting on his knees, listening without pushing.
“She ended it,” I say finally.
Ella’s breath catches. “Katy?”
I nod.
“I don’t understand,” I admit. “Everything was going great. And then suddenly we weren’t. She said she needed space. Like that explained anything.”
I rub a hand over my face.
“I keep replaying everything I said or did. Trying to figure out where I screwed it up.
Because I always do. I always want too much or say something wrong or…” My voice cracks. “I don’t know what I did, El. But I fucked it up. Again.”
Ella’s hand is on my arm immediately. “Oh, Ben, you didn’t.” Her voice is firm, gentle all at once. “You really didn’t.”
I shake my head. “You don’t know that.”
“Yes, I do.” She doesn’t hesitate. “I watched you. You showed up. You were patient. You were honest. You were kind. You’ve been so wonderful to her.”
Wyatt speaks before I can argue.
“Sometimes people don’t leave because you did something wrong.” His voice is quiet, steady. “They leave because they’re not ready for what you’re offering.”
I look up at him.
He meets my gaze without flinching. Fucking Yoda.
“You reached a place she’s not ready to stand in yet,” he adds. “That’s not the same thing as fucking up.”
I lean back against the couch, staring at the ceiling. The house smells like coffee and wet dog and whatever candle Ella always has burning to try to cover up the dog smell. Normal things. The world moving on, even if I’m broken.
“It still hurts.”
“Yeah.” Ella’s voice softens. “I know.”
Danny shifts, nudging my chest with his nose before settling again, warm and heavy. Like he’s personally offended by my emotional state.
“At least I have you, Danny,” I mutter.
“He’s doing his job,” Wyatt says. “Poorly trained, but very committed.”
Ella narrows her eyes. “Hey! He’s a certified therapy dog, thank you very much. A very distinguished professional.”
I exhale something that might almost be a laugh.
“I just wanted to do it right.” My voice roughens. “I wanted to be enough.”
Ella doesn’t hesitate. “You are more than enough, Ben.”
Wyatt nods once. “That was never the question. She’s just going through a lot right now.”
After a moment, I ask, “Do you think she’ll be okay?”
Ella leans her head against my shoulder. “Not right now. But eventually she will be. Remember when you said this to me?”
I swallow, because I did say this to her during her lowest moment. “Yeah.”
Wyatt stands, drains the rest of his beer, and taps the back of the couch once as he passes.
“This isn’t the end. It just feels like it because you’re standing in the middle of it.” Then he disappears down the hall like a man who knows when he’s said enough.
Danny lets out a long sigh and presses closer.
“Okay. And while we wait for the eventually, do you want snickerdoodles or chocolate chips?”
“Both,” I pout miserably.
“You got it.” She disappears into the kitchen.
I take a breath. The tightness in my chest eases. It’s not gone, but it’s manageable.
And for now, that’s enough.
KATY
Grandma Patty has been standing outside my bedroom door for two hours trying to get me to let her in or to tell her what’s wrong. All I manage to do is hiccup between sobs that I’m okay.
“How long has she been like this?” I hear Declan ask quietly.
Grandma Patty doesn’t bother whispering. “Long enough.”
“Has she said anything?”
“She said that she’s okay,” Grandma replies. “That she just needs a minute.” Her voice sharpens. “She’s been saying that for two hours.”
Another broken sound escapes me before I can stop it. No words come out. Just pure heartbreak.
“Do you know what might have happened?”
Grandma sighs. “No idea. I came home and she was already locked inside her room.”
“Who was she with earlier?” His tone turns sharp.
“I think she was with Ben.”
Another quiet sob slips out of me. I hate that I’m making them worry.
“I don’t like this,” Declan mutters.
I hear footsteps getting closer to the door.
“Katy? It’s me. Please come out. You’re kinda freaking me out a little bit,” Declan says gently.
Nothing. I can’t talk. I can’t move.
“Katy,” he tries again, softer this time. “You don’t have to talk. Just… let me know you’re okay.”
I take a shaky breath.
“I’m fine,” I say weakly. Which is technically true. I’m alive and well.
“Please, Katy. Open the door.”
The worry in his voice gives me the strength to get out of bed. I open the door and immediately throw my arms around my brother.
He doesn’t ask more questions. He just holds me while I break down.
By the time Grandma forces a bowl of soup into my hands in the kitchen, I’ve cried myself empty.
I don’t even notice Declan slipping out the door.
Oh God. This is bad.
I hope he’s not going where I think he’s going.
BEN
Declan doesn’t bother knocking. The door just slams open.
Leo is off the couch before it finishes swinging. Mateo straightens at the kitchen island. Uncle Jack looks up from his chair, his expression sharpening.
Declan’s eyes lock on me.
“What the fuck did you do to my sister this time?”
The room goes still.
My stomach drops. “Declan—”
“She didn’t come out of her room for hours,” he cuts in, voice shaking now, raw and uncontained.
“I came home to find my grandma sitting outside her door because she was crying so hard and wouldn’t open the door.
” He takes a step closer. “So I’ll ask again.
” His voice cracks with fury. “What the fuck did you do?”
Leo moves immediately, stepping between us. “Hey. Take a breath.”
Declan doesn’t even look at him. “Stay out of it.”
Mateo pushes away from the island, folding his arms. “That’s not happening.”
Uncle Jack finally speaks. He doesn’t raise his voice. He doesn’t need to. “Declan.”
The room settles instantly.
“You need to lower your voice.”
Declan drags a hand through his hair like he’s trying not to punch something. Or someone. Specifically me.
“I don’t have a lower voice right now.”
I swallow. “I didn’t do anything.”
He spins toward me. “That’s your defense?”
“She broke things off.” I shake my head. “I don’t know why.”
Declan laughs once, sharp and disbelieving. “She broke things off?” His eyes flash. “Then you probably fucked up somehow. I’ll ask again. What. Did. You. Do.”
“That’s enough,” Jack growls at him.
Declan turns on him. “She’s my sister.”
“And this is my house,” Jack replies evenly. “If you want answers, you’re going to listen.”
“Okay, Dec. Relax a bit for me.” Ella approaches him like he’s a wild animal.
Mateo smirks, unable to help himself. “Careful, Declan. You’re starting to sound like a guy whose sister cried because of a stupid asshole.”
Leo nods thoughtfully. “Yeah. Wonder what that must feel like.”
Declan’s head snaps toward them. “Stop it with that shit. You know it wasn’t the same.”
Ella rolls her eyes. “Leave him alone, guys.”
He exhales hard, chest heaving. “Just… tell me what happened. She seemed really happy with you.”
That one hits.
“I honestly don’t know,” I say. My voice cracks despite myself. “It feels like everything changed when I told her I was excited about the baby, about being a dad.”
Declan stares at me. “Then why is she hiding in her room like something tragic happened?”
“Maybe she finally realized she doesn’t want a dumb jock to be her kid’s dad,” I try to say with a joking tone.
That’s always been my concern, that she would realize one day that I’m not as amazing as she’s always thought I am.
I’m not half as smart as she is, and the only thing I’m good for is football and jokes.
“You are not a dumb jock. There are different kinds of intelligence, so stop it with that already,” Ella huffs.
“Okay, mom.” I roll my eyes. My whole family has always tried to make me feel better about not being good at academics. The “different kinds of smarts” speech is one I’ve heard many times before.
“You got me through the worst year of my life, Ben. That’s not something a dumb person does. You got me to laugh again,” Ella tells me honestly.
I put my arms around her. “You would’ve done the same.”
“She’s right. You’re not that bad,” Declan adds reluctantly.
Finally, Jack steps forward, grounding the room by sheer presence. “Right now,” he says calmly, “Katy might just need some space.”
Declan’s shoulders sag slightly, anger bleeding into fear. “Yeah. Maybe.”
Jack looks at me. “Ben?”
“I’ll do anything she needs. I won’t go to her unless she asks.”
Declan meets my eyes, something dark and protective burning there. “Okay,” he says quietly. “But don’t give up on her yet.”
“Of course not.”
He backs toward the door, never breaking eye contact. “If she ends up all alone…” His voice drops. “I won’t forgive you.”
The door closes behind him, and no one moves.
Leo finally exhales. “Jesus.”
Jack turns to me. “Did you mean what you said to her?”
“Yes,” I answer immediately.
Jack nods once. “Okay. Then this probably doesn’t have anything to do with you.”
“That’s not comforting,” I mutter.
“I’m not trying to comfort you. You’re not a toddler. I’m just trying to understand if you need your ass kicked or not.”
“Such a caring uncle,” I mumble. I sink onto the couch, staring at the floor. Maybe I didn’t hurt Katy. Maybe loving her is what scared her.
But fuck, I love her.
I love her and that baby, whatever genetic combo we get.
And I’m not giving up on them.
KATY
Two weeks later
My phone buzzes on the nightstand.
I ignore it.
It buzzes again.
Then again.
I groan, roll onto my back, and finally grab it just to make it stop.
It’s the group chat.
BESTIES
Ella
Okay. That’s it. We’re escalating.
Rebecca
She’s alive, right? Like you’ve physically seen her in the last 24 hours?
Ella
I have no direct proof of life. Just secondhand accounts from Declan.
I smile despite myself. It fades quickly.
Rebecca
Unacceptable.
Rebecca
Katy Montgomery, come outside.
I stare at the ceiling.
Me
I’m fine.
The typing bubbles appear immediately. Both of them.
Ella
No, you’re not.
Rebecca
You don’t get to say “I’m fine” anymore. It’s been two weeks.
I sigh and type back.
Me
I’m tired.
Ella
We know
Ella
Which is why you’re coming to get coffee with us.
Me
No.
Rebecca
Counterpoint
yes.
I roll onto my side, hugging a pillow to my chest.
Me
I don’t want to see anyone.
Ella
Too bad. We’re not “anyone.”
Ella
We’re your people.
That one hits harder than I expect.
Rebecca
Also, before you say it, no, this is not about Ben.
Rebecca
This is about you being a dramatic little hermit who needs some sunlight.
I hesitate.
Me
I’m not ready.
The response is slower this time. More careful.
Ella
Ready for what?
I don’t answer.
Because if I say it out loud, it becomes real.
Rebecca
Katy.
Rebecca
You don’t have to decide anything today.
Rebecca
You just have to see the sunlight for an hour.
I close my eyes.
I picture them standing outside. Ella with that soft, stubborn patience. Rebecca with her sunglasses and confidence and terrifying emotional accuracy.
I want to see them.
I’m just scared of what they’ll see in me.
Me
I can’t promise I won’t cry.
Ella
Perfect. I’ll bring tissues.
Rebecca
I’ll bring sarcasm. It balances it out.
A beat passes.
Rebecca
Katy?
Me
Yeah?
Rebecca
You don’t have to explain anything to us.
Rebecca
You’re allowed to make whatever choices you want to make.
My throat tightens.
I stare at the screen for a long moment, thumb hovering.
Then, finally—
Me
Fine.
Me
But I’m not putting on real pants.
Ella
Deal.
Rebecca
Proud of you.
Rebecca
Still think you’re being silly. But I’m proud anyway.
Me
Just so we’re clear.
The typing bubbles pause. That alone tells me they know what’s coming.
Me
You can’t convince me.
Me
And you definitely can’t trick me into seeing Ben.
Ella
Hey.
Ella
I would never do that.
Rebecca
I might.
Rebecca
But I’m not. Promise.
That earns a weak huff of laughter from me.
Ella
This is about YOU.
Ella
We’re not fixing or forcing anything.
Ella
We just want to get you out of the house.
I hesitate, then type:
Me
Okay. Give me five minutes.
I set the phone down and exhale, one hand drifting instinctively to my stomach. I guess it’s time to try to move on.