Chapter 8
Nine and a Half Years Ago
She’s not going to show.
Chase is seated on a deck chair on the far side of the dormitory’s roof—the boys’ end of the building. He’s got a pizza propped up on a plastic bin that he’s carried upstairs from his room. He’s got cold beers and lime wedges. He’s even got tunes playing on his Bluetooth speaker.
The only thing missing is Zoe.
He opens a Corona and pushes a lime wedge through the top. He leans back in his chair and eyes the pizza box. If she doesn’t show up, he’ll eat a piece or two and cram the rest into his mini fridge.
But he’d much rather feed it to Zoe.
His phone plays “Some Nights” by Fun, and he taps his foot on the asphalt.
He loves this song, because it’s a lot like him—cynical as hell but still upbeat.
Good times don’t usually last, so you have to celebrate your wins.
He sings along with the chorus, leaning his head back to take in the deepening sky and keeping an eye on the stairwell entrance.
But then something appears in his peripheral vision, and he startles like a kitten in a YouTube video. “Holy shit,” he says to Zoe, clutching his heart with his free hand. “You really shouldn’t sneak up on people. How’d you get up here?”
She laughs and then points to another bulkhead on the other side of the roof. He can’t see a door on it, but obviously he miscalculated. “I went up the back stairs.”
“Huh. Sit down,” he says, recovering. “Our pizza is getting cold. Want a beer?”
Her gaze flickers to the other Corona, sitting in a cooler with some ice cubes. A beat goes by. “I don’t drink alcohol,” she says eventually.
“Let me guess—empty calories?”
She shrugs. “You’re twenty-one?” She drops into the other deck chair. This is the first time he’s seen her with her hair down. It’s sliding all over her smooth shoulders.
He can barely process the question. “No, but I have a very good fake ID.” He reaches into the cooler and pulls out a bottle of water, which she takes from him. “Cheers. Here’s to summer nights, warm pizza, and…” Your kissable mouth. “And the fact that the mosquitoes haven’t found us yet.”
She raises her bottle and touches it against his, but her expression is aloof. “Cheers.”
“Let’s dig in.” He flips open the pizza box and offers it to her. She takes a slice, and they each take a bite.
Zoe is suddenly less aloof, though. She lets out a groan of happiness, and he feels about ten feet tall. “It’s not bad, right?” he says unnecessarily.
“It’s the best,” she says between bites.
“Now be honest—did you eat those gross crackers?”
She gives him a sideways glance. “I put them into a drawer for an emergency.”
He still doesn’t quite get it, but he’s not going to press her with questions about why she can’t just eat when she’s hungry. God, it’s weird being a girl. The boys in Filbert—Ethan and the crew—don’t seem to live by those same rules.
“I can’t believe I’ve never been up here before,” she says, glancing around the roof. “I’ve been coming to this camp my whole life.”
“Rooftops are the best,” he agrees. “My mother always said that it’s hard to be stressed out when you can see the sky.”
Zoe’s big brown eyes consider him. “Maybe that’s why I’m such a mess. It hasn’t been a good year for getting outside.”
“How come?”
She frowns at him. “You really don’t follow skating, do you?”
“Nope.”
She takes another bite and chews. “It was an Olympic year. So I trained my ass off.”
His pizza pauses on its way to his mouth. “Wait. Did you go to the Olympics?”
“No!” She finally cracks a smile. “But I love that you don’t know that already. You’re, like, the only person on this campus who isn’t judging me for it.”
There’s definitely a story there. “Why? Were you close?”
She licks a bit of grease off her fingertip, and he feels it in a few inappropriate places. “I was favored to go, but I blew up during nationals, and they passed me over.”
“Well, fuck.”
Her eyes flash with humor. “I might have said that a few times myself.”
He takes another piece of pizza and eyes her thoughtfully. “So what happened?”
“The short story is that I fell.” She takes another bite.
“What’s the long story?”
She finishes her pizza and takes a sip of water.
“The longer version is that I was impulsive. I added a triple axel to my program right before nationals. Five million people watched me fall on that skill on TV, during the first thirty seconds of my free skate. And it kind of broke me. Like I couldn’t remember how not to fall, so I did it twice more before it was over. ”
His heart constricts, but only for a second. Zoe is too good an athlete to want his pity. “That sucks, Ice Princess. So what are you going to do about it?”
“That’s the question, isn’t it?” She leans back in her chair and folds her long arms behind her head. “Part of me wants to pack it in, especially when I read the comments on the internet. But fuck those guys. I still think I can win.”
“Zoe,” he says quietly. “When I watch you skate, I don’t get the feeling you’re finished. It looks to me like you’re just getting started.”
Her brown gaze finds his and holds it. “I think so, too,” she whispers. “Maybe it’s just ego, but I think I have a real shot. If I can shut out all the voices. All the armchair quarterbacks. And just skate.”
He leans back in his chair, and nobody says anything for a minute. But it’s the nice kind of silence—the comfortable kind. “I gotta say—I can’t imagine training for something that only happens every four years. I don’t envy you that. Five minutes and it’s, like, your whole career.”
“Four minutes,” she says with a slow smile. “The men have to go on for four and a half.”
“Hey—four and a half minutes isn’t very long for a guy.” He winks, and she groans.
Then she opens the pizza box and plucks out an olive, popping it into her mouth. “God, I could marry this pizza. Thank you for this.”
“You’re welcome,” he says, his voice deepening. Her gratitude puffs him up with some kind of weird caveman energy. As if he’d hunted this pizza down on the wild plains, pierced it in the neck, and dragged it back to the cave for his woman.
“What else did your mother use to say?” she asks quietly. “If you don’t mind me asking. She sounds more fun than my coach. I mean… you’ve met her.”
“She was fun,” he says immediately. “Even before competitions, she’d be cracking jokes and making everybody smile.”
“Did you really compete?” she asks, her eyes darting back to take him in. “I’m having trouble picturing it. What music did you use for your free skate?”
“Well, Zoe, I had impeccable taste, even as a child. My first routine was set to the Ghostbusters theme.”
He catches her mid-bite, and she narrowly avoids choking. “Wow.”
“In my defense, I was eight.” He waves his arms around. “Who ya gonna call…”
She smiles again, and it feels like winning the Super Lotto.
“My greatest hits also included a Star Wars theme, as well as the Pirates of the Caribbean. But come on, now. You must have used something stupid at some point.”
“Oh, I wanted to,” she admits, grabbing her water for a swig. “But I got shot down. I gave everyone the silent treatment for a week when they wouldn’t let me use a Justin Timberlake song.”
“Uh-oh.” He cringes dramatically. “Which one? I need to know how bad an idea this really was.”
“‘My Love,’” she says with a nervous little smile. “I was twelve. At the time, I thought it was the highest expression of me as a person. Or maybe I just wanted to twerk on the ice and look cool.”
“Like you weren’t already the coolest girl at the party? Please.”
She gives him the side-eye. “I’m not sure you understand how cool works. I’m only cool when I’m skating, and sometimes not even then. And forget parties. I was always getting up for six a.m. ice time, or driving to a competition.”
“Yeah, I know something about that,” he agrees, because the hockey practice schedule is pretty grueling, too.
“That’s why the party has to be up here.
” He taps his temple. “After a long day, you order a pizza for a pretty girl, you play some tunes. I can have fun wherever I am. And if I break a few rules? Even better.”
The compliment lands, and she blushes a rosy shade of pink. “Thank you for the pizza. I can pay you back.”
“That’s not how we’ll do this,” he says. “You get the next one.”
She bites her lip and turns her big brown eyes on him again. “All right. It’s a deal.”