28. Cody
Cody
As much as I hate the reasoning for it, I love having Sloan here. Every time I glance up from practice, I see her sitting in the stands watching me. It’s a great feeling, but I wish she was here because she wanted to be and not just because she’s in danger.
“What’s going through your mind, bro?” Jax skates up next to me and stops.
“I don’t know… I just wish she was here because she wanted to be.”
“Who says she doesn’t want to be here?”
“I don’t know, but she wasn’t given a choice. She either needs to stay glued to my side or risk Jude getting too close.”
“Well, Jude can’t be a threat forever.”
“No, but how does that change anything?”
“Once Jude isn’t a threat, you can see if she still hangs around as much. If she does, she loves you and if she doesn’t, she’s not the one for you.”
“Wow, Jax, you’re making me feel so great about myself.” I roll my eyes.
“Hey, I didn’t say my answer would make you feel better now. Wouldn’t you rather know if she’s the one or not? No matter what, you’d still protect her from Jude. It wouldn’t matter to you even if you knew at the end she’d walk away.”
“That’s true.”
“So, at least you’ll know. If she puts distance between you when this is over, she’s not the one and you can finally move on.” Jax slaps me on the back. “C’mon, we have a bunch of young punks to put in their place.”
“You can sleep in here and I’ll sleep on the couch.” I motion to the twin bed sitting against the wall of my childhood room.
“Ok…” She trails off as she nibbles on her bottom lip. I know something is wrong, but if she won't tell me what, I can’t help her.
“Talk to me, Sloan. What’s going through that beautiful head of yours?” I use my thumb to tug her lip from between her teeth.
“I'm scared. What if he followed us here?”
“Well, the property is gated and we have a real-life GI Joe sleeping across the hall.” I smirk.
“I’m sure Mason wouldn’t enjoy being called a real-life GI Joe.” Sloan rolls her eyes.
“Eh, Mason doesn’t really care. Charlie’s been calling him that since they met.”
I glance over my shoulder to find Uncle Mason leaning his shoulder against the door frame. His arms are crossed over his chest and he’s watching us with a smirk.
“Are you sure we’re safe here?” Sloan asks softly.
“No, but you’re safer here than anywhere else.” Dad shrugs as he pushes past Uncle Mason and steps inside my room.
“Wow, Wes, way to be reassuring and helpful.” Uncle Mason rolls his eyes.
“We won't let anything happen to you, Sloan. Addi’s staying next door at Kennedy’s and Blake is sleeping on my floor. The only person we need to worry about protecting is you.”
“Aren’t you worried about them?”
“Peck and Wyatt are staying over there with them, Charlie, Carter, and Sophia. They’ll protect them, but I also don’t think Jude will go anywhere near them. He only wants you, Sloan.”
Sloan swallows hard and her hands tremble as she wraps them around her waist. She’s terrified of Jude and they aren’t helping.
“Ok, how about instead of you two upsetting her any more than you already have, you can leave and let her sleep. We know you’ll keep everyone safe, we don’t need to know anything else.” I wave them off and guide Dad towards the door, making sure Uncle Mason goes out first.
As soon as they’re in the hallway, I shut the door in their faces and spin around to face my girlfriend.
“What can I do to make you feel better?” I murmur as I move closer to Sloan and hold my arms out to her.
She steps into my arms and her body shakes as her tears finally begin to fall. I hate how scared she is. I want to take away all of her fears and anxieties. I want to see a beautiful smile on her face and nothing else.
I rub a hand up and down her back and I cradle her head against my chest. Leaning down, I press a soft kiss on the top of her head and hug her a little closer.
“Will you sleep in here with me?” She whispers so quietly I almost don’t hear her.
“Of course. Let me get another blanket and pillow.”
I head to the linen closet and grab an extra pillow and blanket. Before I go back to my room, I peek into Jax’s room.
“Hey, are you doing ok?” I lean against the door frame and watch him closely. He’s sitting on the edge of his bed with his elbows on his knees.
Jax is really good at always having an easy smile and acting like nothing is bothering him, but I see behind the mask. I can tell he’s really struggling.
“I just want this to be over, man. I feel like I'm constantly looking over my shoulder.” He sighs and he buries his face in his hands.
“This can’t last forever. Let’s just focus on one day at a time. We’re safe right now and you know Uncle Mason has Mulberry Lane locked down tight.”
“What about at work tomorrow? What if the psycho goes after another fan during the game? What if he brings a weapon to the game and tries to hurt someone? What if he gets his hands on Sloan and we can’t stop him?”
I toss the pillow and blanket on Jax’s chair and I take a seat next to Jax. I mirror his position with my elbows on my knees and give myself a second to think through what he’s asking.
“Well, we can’t control everything in life, Jax.
We can only do so much and have faith for the rest. The stadium has metal detectors and I’ll make sure Uncle Mason talks to security.
Maybe Jude can be checked a little extra than the rest. I don’t know, we can see what Coach will allow and go from there. ”
“Aren’t you scared?” Jax meets my gaze and his eyes are filled with vulnerability and fear.
“I'm terrified,” I whisper. “I don’t want to lose her after just getting her back.”
“You could never lose me,” Sloan whispers. I glance up to find her standing in Jax’s doorway. She’s staring down at her toes, twisting them in the plush carpet.
“Come here, baby.” I hold my arm out and smile when she doesn’t hesitate to sit on my lap. She wraps an arm around my neck and peeks over at Jax.
“I'm sorry, Jaxy. I never meant to bring a crazy person into your life. I know you’re struggling and it’s all my fault.”
I'm surprised when Jax doesn’t try to brush off her concerns or slip behind a mask to hide how he really feels. Instead, he stares at my girl and lets her see everything. He’s opening up to her more than he does with anyone.
“None of this is your fault, sweetheart. And even if it was, I’d still want you back. You make my brother happy and that’s worth it.”
Jax doesn’t hesitate to slide closer to us and hug my girl. They were always pretty close and I'm glad that hasn’t changed. I could never be with someone who doesn’t get along with Jax.
“We just need to keep you safe, that’s all I care about,” he whispers.
After we’ve said goodnight, Sloan and I head back into my room.
She gets settled in my bed and I slide the ottoman closer to the couch.
Mom said when we became teenagers, we could either get a queen bed or have a couch in our rooms. We all chose a couch after Charlie did.
It was the best to be able to relax on or play video games on. Now, I'm really happy with my choice.
Twisting the ottoman so that it’s pushed against the couch and is long enough for me to stretch out, I lay down and get comfortable. I glance over to find my girl watching me. There’s a soft smile spreading across her lips. She’s beautiful.
“Goodnight, baby.”
“Night, handsome.”
I wait until I know Sloan’s asleep before I let myself get tired. I'm just drifting off when my door opens and Jax steps inside. He nudges me to move over and I make room for him on the couch. I was wondering how long it would take for him to come in here.
Whenever we’re going through something, we like to be close to each other.
It makes us feel better. Helps calm the chaos in our heads.
Sophia used to tease us and say we needed the other around so we could break down and put ourselves back together.
We used to say she was crazy, but now I think she’s a little too smart for her age.
“Thank you,” Jax whispers, his shoulder pushed up against mine on the small couch.
“Always, brother.”