Chapter 16
CHAPTER 16
N ash arrived at Jenna’s the next morning with a sense of optimism filling him. He hoped that after a good night’s sleep, the tension between them would fade, and they could return to their easy-going friendship… and more. However, as he stepped inside, the same awkward atmosphere from the previous day greeted him.
Determined to address the issue head-on, Nash turned to face Jenna. His eyes sought hers, searching for answers. “What’s going on? Things have changed between us. At least on your end. My feelings for you are the same.” He paused, gathering his courage. In a moment of raw honesty, he laid his cards on the table, exposing his feelings to her. “I care about you, Jenna. And I thought we were growing closer. But now, it feels like you’re pulling away. Please, talk to me. Help understand what’s going on.”
“I think… maybe we rushed into things. I mean, we hardly know each other.” She still wouldn’t meet his eyes. “There is just so much going on in my life right now. This move. Getting the cottage fixed up. It’s all… it’s a lot. I need… I need space.”
Nash studied her face, searching for clues, but she kept her gaze averted. The distance between them felt like a chasm, and he struggled to bridge the gap. “I understand that you’re going through a lot right now, with the move and the cottage renovations,” he said, choosing his words carefully. “But I thought we were in this together, that there was something special between us.” Just a few days ago, he would have sworn she felt the same way.
He paused, giving her a chance to respond, but she remained silent. The uncertainty gnawed at him, and he wondered if there was more to her sudden change of heart than just the stress of her new life. “If you need some space, I’ll respect that,” he continued, unable to keep the tinge of disappointment out of his voice. “I do care about you, and I want to support you in whatever way you need.”
As the words left his mouth, a dull ache settled in his chest. He’d thought they were growing closer, that their connection was deepening. But now, faced with her withdrawal, he questioned everything. Was she simply overwhelmed by the changes in her life, or was she trying to let him down gently? The thought sent a chill through him, and he silently cursed his inexperience with relationships.
He wanted to reach out to her, to pull her into his arms and reassure her that they could face anything together. But he held back, knowing that he had to honor her request for space, no matter how much it pained him. “Just know that I’m here for you, whenever you’re ready,” he said softly, his eyes searching hers for any sign of the connection they had shared.
As the silence stretched between them, he felt a growing sense of unease. He’d laid his heart on the line, but now he wondered if he had misread the situation entirely. The doubts crept in, whispering that perhaps he had been foolish to believe that someone like Jenna could ever truly care for him. What he’d believed was happening between them, their connection, seemed to slip through his fingers.
A pain stabbed in his chest, and he was certain she wasn’t telling him everything. But he needed to give her what she wanted, what she needed. “If space is what you need, that’s what I’ll give you.”
“I think it’s for the best. For both of us.” She turned and took a few steps away from him, facing the wall between the kitchen and the living room. She flung out her arm. “I was thinking maybe we should take out this wall like you suggested. It would really open up the space.”
Her abrupt change of topic, along with what she said, surprised him. “I thought you said it wouldn’t be in your budget?”
She shrugged, a gesture of dismissal. “It’s only money.”
Nash studied her closely, trying to discern the emotions hidden beneath her nonchalant exterior. “So you really want to tear down this wall?”
“Yes, I think I do.” She nodded slowly, her gaze fixed on the wall as if it held the answers to everything.
“Okay, whatever you say,” he said as the unease grew inside him. As he turned and walked outside, doubts mounted inside of him. He knew she was keeping something from him. He could see it in the shadows that flickered in her eyes, in the way she avoided his gaze.
And the last thing he wanted was a woman keeping secrets from him. He’d been down that road before, and the scars it left still ached deep within him. The thought of history repeating itself filled him with a sense of dread, a cold weight settling in the pit of his stomach. He drew in a deep breath, the salty sea air filling his lungs, but it did little to ease the tightness in his chest.
Yes, the last thing he needed right now—or ever—was a woman keeping secrets from him.
Jenna groaned inwardly, mentally kicking herself for her impulsive declaration about tearing down the wall. What had she been thinking? It was just the first thing that had popped into her mind. It was a spur-of-the-moment idea, a desperate attempt to change the subject and divert Nash’s attention from the emotions she was trying so hard to conceal. And the secret about his family she was hiding. But now, faced with the reality of her budget, she realized the folly of her words.
She was a meticulous planner, always careful with her finances, and the thought of taking on such a significant expense without proper consideration made her stomach churn. To afford the wall removal, she would have to make sacrifices elsewhere, cutting back on other aspects of the renovation that she had so carefully mapped out.
As if the universe had a twisted sense of humor, her phone rang at that precise moment, Marly’s smiling face illuminating the screen. Jenna hesitated, her finger hovering over the answer button. She wasn’t sure if she had the energy to face her sister’s inevitable barrage of questions, to put on a brave face and pretend that everything was fine when her world felt like it was unraveling at the seams.
With a heavy sigh, she resigned herself to the conversation and tapped the green button. “Hey, sis. What’s up?” she greeted, trying to inject a note of cheerfulness into her voice.
“Not much. Just thought I’d check on you.” Marly’s bubbly response filled the quiet of her cottage. “What’s up with you?”
She didn’t really want to talk about her strained relationship with Nash and the mounting pressures of the cottage remodel. And she didn’t want to burden her sister with her troubles. She simply answered. “Same here. Same old, same old.” You know, except that I ruined things with Nash and I’m overspending on the cottage.
“How’s Nash?”
“He’s fine,” Jenna replied, the words tumbling out a little too quickly, a little too automatically. She cringed, knowing that her sister’s keen intuition would likely pick up on the underlying tension in her voice. But for now, she clung to the pretense, hoping to push the conversation in a different direction.
Marly’s eyes narrowed as she studied her sister through the screen. “How fine? You two have another date planned yet?”
She hesitated and turned her face from the screen. “No, I don’t think we’re going to.”
“What? Why not? I thought you liked him.”
“I do, but…” She sighed. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”
Marly’s brow creased in confusion. “Hold on. How did you get from you like him to you don’t think you should date him?”
“It’s complicated,” she offered weakly.
“I’ve got time to listen to your excuses—I mean, your complications.” Marly’s tone was light, but Jenna could hear the concern underneath.
Knowing her sister wouldn’t let it go, Jenna sank onto the couch, her shoulders slumping. “So, I read some more letters. Found out about this lighthouse keeper who is involved in the whole mystery. And in…” She paused, catching herself before she said ‘investigating.’ That wasn’t her life anymore. “In looking into things, I found out it’s someone related to Nash.”
“Was he surprised?” Marly asked, leaning closer to the screen.
“Uh… no.”
Marly’s frown deepened. “He wasn’t?”
“No… because I didn’t tell him.” Jenna’s voice grew quieter. “And I’m not looking into things anymore. It’s not my place. I put the letters and the photo back in the box. I’m done with it.”
Her sister’s expression softened, understanding dawning in her eyes. “Because of what happened back in San Francisco? You know this isn’t the same, sis.”
Her throat tightened. “Isn’t it? What if I uncover something that shouldn’t be uncovered? Or worse, what if I only find out the partial truth again?” Her voice cracked. “I cannot ruin anyone else’s life. I can’t.”
“I get it. Why you feel that way. But maybe you should just tell him the truth. Let him decide if he wants to look into things or not.”
“I think it’s smarter if I just drop the whole thing.”
“I don’t.” Marly shook her head. “I think you should deal with it head-on.”
“I can’t. I’ve already kept it a secret. And if I tell him now, I’d have to explain why I kept it a secret. And I’m not ready to… to explain things. What I did.”
“Jenna, I wish you’d forgive yourself. Let it go.”
“I take full responsibility for my actions. What happened because of my choices.” She held up a hand, her voice firm. “And we’re not going to talk about this any longer. Please, Marly, just give it a rest.”
“Okay, but now I’ll have to go back to worrying about you.” Marly gave her a small smile.
“Or not. You could just let me live my life.” The words came out harsher than she’d intended.
“Fine. I hear you loud and clear. I should go anyway. Bye, Jenna.” And with that, Marly ended the call before Jenna could even attempt to apologize.
She sat there, feeling the weight of her words and the strain on her relationship with her sister. She was making an even bigger mess of her life. How had moving to the peaceful island of Magnolia Key ended up… like this?