Chapter 18
Ifelt lighter as I walked over to Shadowkeep.
I didn’t exactly appreciate the ambush, but I had to admit that Eva and Zale were right.
I was carrying too much on my own. They might not be able to help in more material ways—having the visions in my place, for example—but just having someone to talk to, who understood enough of what I was dealing with to offer some sympathy and advice, had already lifted some of the weight off my shoulders.
A little strand of guilt was threaded through that lightness.
I didn’t want to put them in danger, and proximity to me was starting to qualify as dangerous.
Then again, I reasoned, everyone in Sedgwick Cove was in danger.
Everyone was under the constant, looming threat of the Darkness, whether they realized it or not.
Maybe the knowledge they had would keep them safer—knowledge is power, isn’t that how the saying went?
That was what I was after—the knowledge of what I was facing.
It couldn’t be bad for them to know as well.
Surely it was better to understand the nature of a threat if you want to survive it.
My thoughts turned to Nova. No matter how much I racked my brain, I couldn’t think of a single innocuous reason why she would have a copy of the same book I was carrying.
I knew this wasn’t exactly fair—after all, I was carrying the book for a fairly innocuous reason.
But then again, what were the odds that she was casually researching demons, a topic so taboo within our town borders that even the suggestion that you were engaging with it could cause… well, a witch hunt.
I snorted. My life was absurd.
But seriously, it wasn’t only the fact that she had the book.
It was her manner, the fact that she was so jumpy and defensive.
The fact that she actually stole the book rather than be seen purchasing it.
And above all, it was the desperation in her voice when she begged me to come to the Manor.
Something was wrong, I could feel it in my bones.
Whatever it was, I hoped we could sort it out without Ostara finding out.
If I was worried about my own family’s reactions to my recent activities, it was nothing to what Nova must be feeling.
Ostara’s stringent opposition to anything that could be considered malevolent magic was so well known and so severe, that I shuddered to think what would happen to Nova if Ostara ever found out that her daughter had even touched a book like Conjuration Moste Wycked, let alone read it.
Whatever she’d gotten herself into, we had to help her get out of it, and quickly.
The more I thought about the urgency of it, the more relief I felt that Zale and Eva would be coming with me.
I felt like I could use all the help I could get.
I checked my watch, swore under my breath, and walked faster.
Thanks to my minor kidnapping detour, the store would be opening late.
I didn’t think it really mattered, with customers so scarce; but, knowing my luck, the one day I was late, there would be a small crowd of people waiting at the door, demanding to be let in.
As I rounded the corner and Shadowkeep came into view, the porch was deserted.
I breathed a sigh of relief: a break at last. I opened the gate, and was halfway up the walk when I heard voices coming from nearby.
I froze, listening. It sounded like two voices, coming from around the side of the building.
I stepped off the walkway and began to creep to the corner.
I peeked my head around just far enough to get a glimpse.
Leila was standing about two-thirds of the way up the staircase that led to the second-floor entrance of the shop.
She was facing the top of the stairs, and she appeared to be arguing with someone.
Because of the angle of the staircase, I couldn’t see who the second person was, nor could I catch enough of what they were saying to make a guess.
I crept closer, keeping myself pressed to the side of the house, until I stood directly beneath the staircase.
From here, the voices became clear, and I realized after just a few words that the second voice belonged to Persi.
“—honestly can’t believe you would say something like that.”
“I… I’m sorry, I’m only trying to—”
“That is such bullshit, Leila, you know that? Self-serving bullshit!”
Persi’s voice was shaking. She sounded furious.
“Please, Persi, this has nothing to do with me, it’s not—”
“Of course it has to do with you! Did you think that if you told me this, I’d fall into your arms with gratitude? Realize I’ve been in love with you all along?”
“No, of course not! And I wasn’t even coming here to tell you! I didn’t think you’d be here!”
“It’s my store!”
“But you’re never here! Not anymore!” Leila shot back, a bit of anger coming to her defense now. “I was just going to leave the message with Wren and ask her to—”
“You were going to use my niece to do your dirty work? That’s even worse, using some innocent kid to—”
“I’m not using anyone!” Leila was shouting now. “I was just trying to help!”
“Well, stop! Whatever kind of help you think this is, just stop, Leila!”
And over Leila’s continued protestations, Persi stormed down the steps, right across the garden, and out of the side gate.
I caught a glimpse of her face as she turned the corner, and saw that it was glazed with angry tears.
I could see her batting furiously at them as she stormed off down the street.
Above me on the stairs, Leila stood motionless, staring at the place where Persi had been standing, one hand resting on the railing.
I hesitated, trying to figure out what to do, and then decided I couldn’t just leave her up there looking so devastated.
I moved out from under the staircase, and circled around to look up at her.
“Leila?”
I spoke her name quietly, but Leila jumped like I’d shouted, and whirled around to face me.
“Wren! What are you… where did you come from?”
“I’m really sorry. I was running a little bit late this morning. I just got here.”
As the surprise drained out of Leila, so did her will to stand. She sank down onto the step she’d been standing on, bringing her knees right up to her chin and hugging them tightly with both arms, making her look like a small child.
“How much of that did you hear?” she asked in a hollow voice.
“Just a bit,” I said, figuring it would be pointless to lie. I ascended a few steps, and sat just below her. “Really, only the storming out part. Want to talk about it?”
Leila sighed. “It was stupid. I never should have… I should have just ignored it.”
“Ignored what? What was she so mad about?” I asked.
Leila looked at me for several seconds, like she was deciding if it was worth telling me. Then she shrugged. “Oh what the hell. You already know how pathetic I am, after the roses. What’s one more humiliation for the pile?”
“I don’t think you’re pathetic,” I said, but she went on like I hadn’t spoken.
“Last night, when I was using my tarot deck, a message came through. I didn’t really understand it, but it kept coming up, over and over again. It didn’t make any sense to me, but eventually I figured out why. It wasn’t for me. It was for Persi.”
“Oh,” I said, frowning. “But… that’s common enough with tarot, isn’t it? To get messages for people?”
“Yes, of course,” Leila said. “But Persi has been so… I didn’t want to bother her with it. I decided to keep it to myself, but… well, the spirit guides weren’t very happy with that.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean they’ve bombarded me with that message ever since. I haven’t been able to give a reading all day. I just keep getting the same message with more and more insistence. Finally, I couldn’t ignore it anymore, and so I decided to pass it along.”
“It sounds like that’s what you were supposed to do,” I said. “That’s… that’s part of being a spirit witch, right? Surely Persi understands that.”
“Under normal circumstances, yes,” Leila said. “But these weren’t normal circumstances.”
“What do you—”
“It’s a bit awkward when the girl who’s madly in love with you brings you a message from your dead girlfriend.”
I blinked. “Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“The… the message was from Bernadette?”
“Unfortunately, yes. I didn’t believe it at first. I honestly thought the universe must be screwing with me, or else that I was just torturing myself in some weird subconscious way.
Why she chose me to deliver it, I have no idea, but she made it very clear that she’d never let me rest until I did,” Leila said, shaking her head.
“That’s… I’m sorry, that’s awful.”
Leila shrugged again. “I’ve had to deliver some pretty awful messages.
When you practice actual tarot and not sideshow carnival crap, that’s par for the course, unfortunately.
I’ve been screamed at, spit on, and offered exorbitant amounts of money to predict something else.
Nothing they did could change what the cards said. ”
“But surely Persi wouldn’t think that way,” I said. “She knows how this works.”
“Yes, but she doesn’t trust me to tell her the truth,” Leila said. “She sees me only as someone who will say anything to be with her.”
“So she didn’t believe the message?”
“She wouldn’t even let me get that far. As soon as I told her the message was from Bernadette, she freaked out.”
My heart sank. “So you couldn’t even deliver it?”
Leila shook her head. “I should have realized she wouldn’t listen. I knew it. But I had an obligation to try.”
“You said you were going to tell me instead of Persi,” I reminded her.
“Do you still want to?” I tried to make the question sound disinterested, but the truth was that I was burning up with curiosity.
What did Bernadette Claire have to say that was important enough to break the silence of the grave?