Chapter 44 My Empress
Wren slipped Castien’s necklace over her head—careful not to let it catch on her hair—and handed it to Castien. He pushed it into the lock that led to his belowground study.
“You said before that if it were within your means, you’d give me what I asked for. What if I wanted your key?” Wren teased as he opened the door.
The party was over. She was drained after being around so many vacillating emotions, but she didn’t want to go to her chambers quite yet.
Being around Castien always had a calming effect.
Plus, there was his promise to let her comb through the contents of his study.
Such a gift of trust could not be put off for another day.
Wren’s curiosity was endless when it came to anything Castien was involved in.
Castien walked inside and held the door open, a smirk occupying his lips. She felt his amusement brush against her.
“I suppose I’d have Heathford make a copy of it, though to my knowledge there has never been more than one key.” He shut the door behind them, then turned and leaned against it. “Are you testing my words, dearest?”
“If I am?”
Wren drew closer and settled her hands against his chest. She felt his love and affection abound.
“You will be hard-pressed to discover something I’d say no to when it comes to you.” He slid a hand beneath her jaw. “Especially tonight. You look … exquisite.” His eyes dropped to her lips.
“So I need only to look pretty to sway you?” she jested. “I will have to tell Blossom to dress me in my finest garments and jewelry. Tomorrow I shall ask for your crown.”
Castien’s eyes met hers with breathtaking intensity.
“You need only to exist, my love.” He gently touched one of Wren’s arranged curls. “A crown would suit you tonight. I would give you my kingdom if you asked. Bow before you as my empress, queen of my heart.”
“Castien,” Wren whispered. “You cannot mean that.”
A soft smile melted over his features.
“Perhaps I shouldn’t, for it puts me in a precarious position, but I mean every word. Everything I am, everything I own, belongs to you.”
Wren leaned into him and pressed a kiss to his lips.
She relaxed into his embrace, his love. Let him thaw the icy walls she had erected long ago to protect herself.
Behind them was a sensitive, fragile heart that she was afraid of placing in his hands.
But the more he showed her with his words and actions how he loved her, the easier it became to let go of her fears.
Castien’s lips moved against hers with a tenderness that was belied by the fervor she felt building within him.
Wren pulled back before the intensity could increase.
Over the past few days, she’d experienced the intrusion of darkness less and less when kissing Castien, but she lacked energy this evening and was afraid that it would affect her.
“Are you okay?” Castien asked, studying her with a furrowed brow.
“Yes,” she assured him with a chaste kiss. “I am merely tired, and I don’t want to push myself too far.”
He nodded in understanding. “We have forever.”
A smile lifted her lips. He’d uttered that phrase many times since the night she first kissed him. It was the perfect reminder that he didn’t expect her to rush. Though she still had worries about the future, his constant reassurance helped stave off the worst of her anxiety.
“Yes, forever.”
He smiled and kissed her forehead.
“Would you like to begin your investigation of the room? If you are too tired, we can come back another time.”
Wren shook her head and stepped back.
“I want to look. I’ve been curious for so long, I’d at least like to read a little before going to bed.”
Castien gestured to the wall of journals.
“Read away. I will be here if you have any questions.”
He walked around his desk and settled into the chair behind it. Wren turned to the wall of books and began surveying the labels on the spines. They each had a last name and a year beside them.
“These indicate the High Inquisitor and the year of their reign, I presume?” she asked, tracing one of the spines.
“Yes, that is correct. Mine are kept here on my desk for ease of access, but there are a great many interesting accounts on the shelves.”
Wren pulled down the one that was dated the year before Castien’s reign. She wondered if the previous High Inquisitor had written about him.
Castien spoke as Wren opened the tome. “I wanted to ask you something, but please know you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”
She glanced over her shoulder, noting a tinge of worry wiggling through her.
“It is in regard to your Gift—or Curse, as you often call it.”
That explained his hesitation. Wren had berated her Gift many times within the pages of her journal and had hinted to hating it within her letters to Castien. While it had proven useful in recent days, she still wasn’t entirely at peace with its presence.
She turned to face Castien, book in hand.
He continued, “I don’t want you to think I wish to use you in any way because that is not my intention, but I am curious if you felt anything amiss within your friend Cyprus this evening?”
Wren tilted her head to the side. She hadn’t expected that question.
“I know you would not use me,” she said, speaking to both Castien and her fears at once. “As for Cyprus, he is always a bit off. His emotions are quite scattered and tumultuous. I believe it is due to an insecurity about his lower station. My theory is that he wishes to prove himself.”
Castien nodded, his expression thoughtful.
“Since we have grown closer, especially since our betrothal, he has seemed hostile. Not in a direct way but enough for me to take notice. I worry that he might have unrequited affections for you.”
Wren laughed at the notion.
“I do not think so. I have not felt as much. Besides, what do you need to worry about that for? I do not fret over Calypsia’s obsession with you for I know where your affections lie.”
Castien smiled. “It is not the affections I am concerned about, but rather if he will act on them. Especially if he is as internally volatile as you say. I am protective of you, that's all.”
Wren walked behind the large wooden desk and bent down to kiss Castien’s cheek.
“You are chivalrous in your endeavors, but it is not necessary. Cyprus has never expressed interest in me, and I’ve never felt what I feel from you in him.”
“I don’t expect the latter. He couldn’t match the strength of my feelings,” Castien replied, mirth sparkling in his eyes.
“Then we are agreed: there is nothing to worry about.”
He hummed, but the expression he wore said he didn’t quite agree.
“Now, are you going to stop distracting me so I can read?” Wren asked, holding up the book with a playful smile.
“Only if you’ll stay near while you do. I have grown weary of sharing you with the world this evening. Take my chair, and I will drag the other around.”
Castien started to stand, but Wren placed a hand on his shoulder to halt him.
“I have a better idea.”
He raised a brow in question. Wren turned to the side and sat down in his lap, her legs draped over the side of the chair.
She felt his joy bubble like a tea kettle.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, cradling her in his embrace.
Wren opened the book, doing her best to focus on the pages.
She found it easier as time went on. Castien did not move; he merely held her as she read.
It was a quiet solace that Wren knew she would visit in her memories in the days to come.
“He describes you as cold and calculating,” Wren said after she finally reached something concerning Castien. “If only he could see you now.”
Castien chuckled. “Very few see me as anything but his description, and that is what I prefer. My warmth belongs to you.” He brushed his lips over her cheekbone.
“So I should not expect for you to take Finn’s likeness in the future?”
“Certainly not.” Wren laughed at his dry tone. “It is best that society sees me as unfeeling, so they hesitate before crossing me.”
Tonight was a reminder for Wren that Castien was much more than the man who brushed away her tears and kissed her softly.
He was a prince, the High Inquisitor of an elite group of powerful students, and a future emperor.
A skilled warrior, as well. He’d slain cryptura and interrogated men until they confessed.
Such behavior might be overwhelming or intimidating if Wren did not know the heart behind it all.
“And in that, you are able to protect those you care for,” Wren added.
Castien’s grip tightened around her. “Exactly. I must be feared, to protect whom I love.”
Wren turned her face toward him.
“A part of me wishes that it didn’t have to be that way. That you could show everyone this side of you.” She reached up and ran her fingers through his curls. “But another, more selfish part of me enjoys that I am the one who possesses the treasure of knowing you so deeply.”
“Even if I carried myself with gentleness and ease, no one would know me as well as you.”
A grin spread across her face.
“I love you very much,” she said, for no other reply would do.
Castien kissed the corner of her smile.
“And I you, dearest.”