Chapter 9
Ihave made a terrible mistake.
Shan stood with his hands folded behind his back as Leonie gave the assembled counselors one final pep talk before the campers arrived.
It seemed he wasn’t the only person having second thoughts about the summer.
With the campers due to arrive at any moment, some of the other new counselors looked like they too were regretting all their life choices.
“I know many of you are feeling nervous right now,” Leonie told the group.
She gave them all a rueful smile. “Believe me, I’m nervous too, and I’ve been doing this for years.
Being responsible for the happiness and wellbeing of a bunch of kids all summer is terrifying.
But it’s also the most rewarding job in the world.
No matter how you feel now, I’m certain that by the end of this summer, you’ll be signing up for next year, too. ”
They were not empty platitudes. Her sincerity melted in his mouth like candied rose petals.
It made him want more. More of her honesty, her open compassion. More of her.
Control. He breathed out, trying to ignore the tantalizing sweetness. Every word she spoke only deepened his resolve.
Leonie was kind, and caring, and good. If she discovered that they were mates, he had no doubt she would accept him with open arms, convinced that love could tame even a qiongqi.
At best, she would be dooming herself to a life of isolation and heartbreak, watching in pain as he lost all outward appearance of humanity.
At worst…
We are monsters, my son. Even after all these years, he could still taste the words, sweet enough to burn. Never forget that.
He swallowed, banishing the old memory. The past would not repeat itself. He had failed once, when he had been young and na?ve. Now he understood his nature.
Leonie did not believe in monsters. He would not teach her otherwise.
“And most importantly, remember to have fun,” Leonie said, coming to the end of her speech.
“Our job is to make sure every camper has a great summer, but I want you all to enjoy yourselves as well. Take this opportunity to get back in touch with your own inner animal. Goof around with the kids, and let yourself be a little silly. Camp Thunderbird is a place where everyone can relax and be themselves. That goes for you, too.”
Was it his imagination, or did her gaze linger on him? He hoped not. It might be good advice for the other counselors, but he had to stay on his guard.
“Does everyone know their pack number and muster station?” Leonie asked the group. At the mass answering nods, she consulted her watch. “The buses should be arriving in a few minutes. Off you go then, and prepare to greet your campers. And don’t worry! They won’t bite. Not in human form, at least.”
That earned her a general chuckle, though a few of the newer staff members still looked rather apprehensive. The group broke up, each pair of co-counselors heading to their assigned meeting spot.
“Pack lists distributed, weekly schedule posted, cabins checked…” Leonie muttered, ticking items off a list. She tucked her clipboard under her arm. “Looks like we’re running right on time for once. You ready for this?”
Shan had never felt less ready for anything in his entire life. “As much as possible.”
“Hey.” She touched his arm, just above his glove. “I know working with kids is way out of your comfort zone, but it’s going to be okay. Trust me, the campers will love you.”
There was no way to explain that his current state of mind had very little to do with the prospect of posing as a counselor, and much more with the light press of her fingertips on his bare skin.
He was used to living with hunger, but this felt like being eviscerated from the inside.
He gave her a curt nod, not trusting himself to speak.
“And anyway, I’ll be with you the whole time,” Leonie continued, blithely unaware that this was, in fact, the entire problem.
“I’ll do all the work of managing the kids.
You just need to listen out for any hints they might drop about what’s going on.
Don’t worry, I’m not expecting you to supervise the campers on your own. ”
“Leonie!” A counselor dashed up to them, out-of-breath and wild-eyed.
“We’re unloading the buses, but eight campers can’t find their backpacks, five have gotten stuck in their shift forms, three are having meltdowns about missing their families already, and one kid is refusing to even get off the bus. ”
Leonie just chuckled, as though this catalogue of disaster was entirely normal.
“At least all the buses got here this time. Last summer, one of them broke down halfway because a kid shifted into an elephant in the back seat. It’s all right, I’ll come help sort everything out.
” Then she hesitated, shooting him a worried glance. “Oh. Except—”
“Go,” he told her, privately relieved at the interruption. “I will stay here to meet the campers.”
“Are you sure?” Leonie drew him to one side, lowering her voice. “I didn’t mean to throw you in the deep end like this.”
“I will be fine.” Even in his distracted state, he’d managed to take in enough of the counselor training to know what to do. “The children know their pack assignments. I only need to wait for them to arrive and then take them to the dining hall for snacks and the director’s welcoming speech.”
“I’ll join you as soon as I can. And most of the kids in our group have been coming here for years. I’m sure they won’t be any trouble.” Leonie hurried away, calling back over her shoulder, “Kids! Help Shan welcome the new campers, okay?”
The hair on the back of his neck prickled. He turned, and discovered a row of young faces beaming up at him.
At least, four of them were beaming. The fifth very much was not.
“Hiiiiiiii, Shaaaaan,” Estelle said in sweet, sing-song tones. “I didn’t know you were going to be a counselor this year.”
Neither did I. “It was a last-minute appointment.”
From the way Estelle beamed at him, he might as well have handed her a free puppy. “That’s great.”
“That you’re one of our counselors, that is,” Archie added, also beaming ear-to-ear.
This was clearly not a sentiment universally shared by the entire group. Rufus lurked behind the other kids, shoulders up around his ears and mouth set in a tight, flat line.
Still, at least Rufus’s wariness was understandable. The apparent delight of the other children, less so. Shan was not used to people being quite this enthusiastic about his presence. Or at all enthusiastic, for that matter.
The children were probably just excited about the start of camp. Which reminded him of Leonie’s concerns about gossip. Perhaps he could help her in another small way.
“I’m glad to have an opportunity to speak with you in private, before the rest of the pack arrives,” he said to the kids. “I would appreciate it if you did not share the story of what you saw in the woods with any of the other campers. It might frighten them.”
“Of course,” Finley agreed, a bit too readily. If anything, he seemed rather relieved by the request. “Don’t worry, we won’t tell anyone.”
“We don’t need to,” Archie said, as though this should have been obvious. “Not now we’ve told you.”
Shan frowned. The boy’s statement had the sweetness of truth, but it was complex, like dark chocolate over cherries. Not a simple truth at all. “Me?”
Beth kicked Archie’s ankle. “He just means we only wanted to make sure the camp staff knew about the thing in the woods, sir.”
“So that someone could investigate.” Estelle fixed him with big, innocent eyes; one pale blue, the other deep green. “Someone is going to investigate, right?”
“Estelle!” Beth hissed.
His sense of disquiet deepened. Admittedly, he had not been particularly subtle in his line of questioning earlier, and by all accounts they were bright children.
It wouldn’t take an enormous leap of logic for them to deduce that the oddly dressed stranger with an unusual interest in ghost stories might be here to do more than just supervise singsongs around the campfire.
And yet… the flavors didn’t make sense. Everything was that strange, bittersweet mix of truth and falsehood.
Beth hadn’t been lying when she’d said they’d wanted the adults to know about the so-called ghost sighting.
But the word only had carried a sour twist, like bitter lemon.
That had been a lie, though not a selfish one.
Something strange is going on here.
There was no time to question the children about it now. Groups of campers started to stream into the central square, shouting and jostling as they hunted for their assigned counselors. The rest of his own pack would be here any moment.
“Yes, the director asked me to look into the matter,” he said, his thoughts as confused as the growing clamor filling the air. “He’s anxious to ensure there is no danger to the camp.”
Rufus’s head jerked up. He caught a brief flash of a piercing, startled stare before the boy looked away again, hiding his face.
Shan silently cursed himself. Rufus knew full well that the senior staff were aware the other campers were lying through their teeth about the so-called ghost sighting.
And now, he also knew that they still thought there might be some other genuine threat.
It was somewhat disconcerting to be on the receiving end of his own ability for once.
“But I would ask you to keep that to yourself as well,” he said, picking his words with care. “Leonie is worried that if rumors start flying around, it could cause a panic.”
“We don’t want to cause any problems for the camp,” Beth said fervently, the statement tasting of ripe peaches. “We won’t breathe a single word, sir.”
Estelle mimed zipping her lips. “Your secret is safe with us.”
“What secret?” asked a bright, interested voice.