Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Poppy changed the name of the chat to Football Daddy’s Fan Club.

Poppy: Are we all watching the game today?

Poppy: This is wild. I can’t believe I’ve never watched a football game before.

Kinsley: I haven’t either and I feel like it’s a missed opportunity. Do you see all these tight pants?

June: OMG did you really change our name to that?

June: You did! You are the worst sister in history.

Poppy: You’re welcome. I’m just taking the initiative and doing something you wouldn’t have the balls to do.

Kinsley: Speaking of balls, have you seen the quarterback? Oh, and they had a close-up on a player named Bronson. Jesus H. Christ. I think I found a name for my new vibrator.

June: You name your vibrators?

Kinsley: Uhhhhhhh do you not? I can think of a few names for you to use.

June: Sadly all my toys are trapped in my apartment.

Poppy: Something we need to rectify immediately. Can you send me your temporary address please?

June: Did you see that play? It was something. They blew the whistle and everything.

Kinsley: To be fair they blow the whistle a lot.

Poppy: Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing June Elizabeth Morgan. I will find you.

Poppy: You don’t want me sending a gigantic rubber dildo to the office, do you?

June: You wouldn’t!

Poppy: I’d even address it to Mom with a note for you inside.

Kinsley: Remind me not to get on your bad side.

Kinsley: OMG! Ryan has the ball. He’s running his ass off. LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Poppy: They said he’s a tight end and now I can’t stop staring at his ass.

Kinsley: But look at fifty-five over by the bench. Those thighs and that ass are what dreams are made of.

June: Goal!

June: Score?

June: Google said touchdown. That’s my bad.

Poppy: You should probably learn the basics.

Kinsley: What does Oliver think?

June: He’s enamored. He’s been glued to the game since it started. Every time Ryan takes the field he shouts “Daddy.” It’s super cute.

Poppy: Wasn’t that the girlfriend they just showed?

Poppy: Did he say anything about her?

June: Yes. And no.

Kinsley: Thanks for not boring us with too many details.

June: It didn’t come up and it doesn’t matter. I’m sure we’ll meet at some point.

June: I’m glad he has someone.

Poppy: BULLSHIT.

Poppy: When are you going to find someone? Seriously, June. When was the last time you were serviced?

June: You think I’m a car?

Poppy: Just saying. You’ve got to clean out the attic every now and then or you’ll have a family of bats living in there.

June: I don’t have bats in my vagina.

Kinsley: That’s a mental image.

Poppy: Was football daddy the last guy?

Poppy: He was, wasn’t he?

Poppy: June, this is sad. I’m not telling you to get married or jump into a serious committed relationship. You owe it to yourself to have some fun.

Kinsley: Just double wrap that dick just in case.

June: I’m going to watch the game now. Feel free to stop talking.

Poppy: I think you know that’s not going to happen. If you don’t find someone to take you on a date, Kins and I will find you someone.

Poppy: It’s just a date. No big deal. Nothing has to happen.

Kinsley: Oh, I like this. I already have the perfect guy in mind.

June: Is that all I need to do to get you off my back? Go on one date?

Poppy: Yep.

June: Fine. Game on.

Kinsley: I’d call this a touchdown win!

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