CHAPTER 10
maverick
Do you like ramen?” I called out, chewing on a toothpick, as I considered the slim options in my room that I had to offer Harley.
I knew I could easily cave and have him buy us dinner, but that defeated the point of my making him dinner.
It was a silly thing, but I wanted to do something nice for him.
Unfortunately, the idea of feeding ramen to someone with the kind of money he had was mortifying and ridiculous.
“I’ve never had it,” Harley replied from the kitchen.
Grabbing two bags, I shoved the box back in the closet wall and hurried to join him.
When he saw me from his spot at the tiny kitchen table, an easy smile overtook that pretty face of his.
Those full lips of his were slightly swollen, and his cheeks were flushed.
Kissing on the beach led to kissing in the car and then against the front door.
And now he was sitting in my kitchen, which gave me ideas.
He was an untapped well of need and passion.
For the guy everyone called a prude, he sure as hell couldn’t get enough of me.
Which I liked. Kissing him was an effortless adventure of figuring out the sounds he made while knowing nothing more was expected.
I liked that journey. The intrigue of him was addictive.
“I don’t make it like the package says,” I informed him as I moved around the limited space. “I drain the water and just mix the noodles with the seasoning.”
“Isn’t it supposed to be a soup?” he asked. I liked the slight way his nose crinkled when he said it.
“Yeah, but I don’t like soup,” I shot back.
Another shrug, another smile, and I was definitely a goner for Harley Lowell. It was unexpected, but I welcomed how everything was just easier around him. He spilled sunshine into my dark places. I craved it. Needed it. Wanted more of it—as much as humanly possible.
I’d never liked anyone the way I liked him, and that should’ve scared me, but it didn’t. If anything, it invigorated me.
I liked everything about Harley and being around him.
Dinner turned into showing him my pathetic little corner of a room and making out all over again.
There was no rush as something oddly peaceful settled over us, and we just lay there tangled up in one another.
I let Harley take the lead, letting him experiment however he wanted to.
I was a willing participant in whatever he wanted.
But when I saw headlights pass over the window, I was up and out of bed in a heartbeat—one that had my chest constricting and the blood rushing in my ears. I had no idea how Aidan would react to Harley being here, but I didn’t want him to stick around and find out.
“Come on,” I said as I held a hand out. Harley took it, and I practically yanked him out of bed. “You need to leave.”
“What—”
“I need you to leave, Harley,” I repeated over him. Thankfully, he didn’t argue. I stuck close, keeping one on his lower back, as I ushered him outside. The door to Aidan’s car opened, but I ignored him. Instead, I focused on getting Harley out of there. “Get in your car, and don’t look back.”
“Are you safe?” He paused just a moment, and an uncomfortable anxiety clawed its way through my chest. I could feel the weight of Aidan’s stare as he watched us.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I told him with a smile. At least, I hoped I would. Aidan’s response to Harley would be unpredictable, but I knew in no way would it be a good one.
I patted the hood of Harley’s car once before he pulled away.
I watched his taillights as he drove away to make sure he got out of there without any issue.
Only when he was gone did I look at my brother.
His expression made my heart race. It was calculated and composed.
That was worse than anger. His anger was loud and explosive, but it was predictable.
I knew the hits were coming. This was colder and more dangerous. It scared me.
He followed me back inside without a word.
I was left standing in the middle of the living room while the minutes of silence grated on me like razors.
The already small space felt smaller in every way.
The walls seemed to close in around us as I just waited with bated breath for him to say something.
“Imagine my surprise when I get a call from Jay telling me my baby brother is playing house with Harley Lowell,” he began, the bitter tone in his voice making me uneasy.
Under his breath, he added, “Stupid fucking rich people living in a goddamn golden palace while the rest of us struggle to put food on the table.”
“It’s not a golden palace,” I said. The second the words left my mouth, my stomach twisted painfully with dread.
“So you’ve been there,” he replied. How he rounded on me made my stomach drop.
My body reacted before my thoughts did, my muscles tightening and my heart kicking up against my ribs.
I knew exactly where this conversation was going.
I’d seen it too many times before. Aidan didn’t ask questions unless he already knew the answer.
Aidan had given up on real jobs a long time ago. Being a tourist-heavy town gave him and his crew plenty of opportunities for petty theft. Since I was a kid, I’d been roped into helping him whenever he ordered it. My purpose depended solely on his demands.
He stuck mostly to tourist areas—hotels, beach rentals, and so on—because he was more likely to get away with it. People like the Lowells he left alone because the stakes were higher, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t steal from them if he could figure out how to pull it off unscathed.
My throat tightened. I could see the possibilities unfolding in his head, and I needed to stop him before everything got out of control.
“Please, Aidan,” I whispered, not caring if I sounded pathetic. I couldn’t let him use Harley like that. The thought of it made something desperate rise in my chest. “I like him.”
It felt dangerous to say the words out loud. Admitting it made it something Aidan could grab onto and crush at will.
“Do you really think the Lowells will let their son be around the gay trailer trash kid?” he scoffed. “You already had the world looking down on you before you decided to be a faggot.”
The words cut in places that he constantly assaulted, reopening fresh wounds that never healed.
I drew in a sharp breath but said nothing.
He wanted to get a rise out of me. Ever since he had figured out that I was gay, it was just one more thing to use against me. One of these days, I’d fight back.
Just not today.
“Just leave them be, Aidan,” I said again as I did my best to keep my voice steady. No weakness. If I showed weakness, he’d use it against me. He always used it against me.
“I don’t think you understand me,” he began and set down his beer. The simple action made my adrenaline kick up. I recognized the lead-up in him and took a careful step back in case I needed to run. “I wasn’t asking. You live in my house. Don’t you forget that.”
“It’s Mom’s,” I muttered before I could stop myself.
I instantly regretted it. The dark anger that flashed across his face was more terrifying than any words he’d ever say.
My heart kicked up hard enough to make my vision blur at the edges and steal the breath from my lungs. I shouldn’t have said the words.
“What did you say?” he growled.
“Nothing,” I whispered weakly. It was smarter to lie. Safer.
“That’s what I thought,” he said. “Figure it out, Maverick. I expect you to pull your own weight around here. I’m not taking care of a fucking freeloader.
You wanted to finish school, I said fine.
You haven’t found a job that works with your schedule, which means I’m stuck taking care of your dumbass. You owe me.”
The words crawled under my skin despite all the armor I put up, and I just nodded, not knowing how to reply.
He was right. I did owe him. He could’ve kicked me out years ago, but he didn’t.
Instead, he let me stay and try. Which, honestly, I understood the irony of that request. I ditched school a lot, but my grades were good.
I didn’t want to be a dropout. Some day I’d make something out of myself.
Maybe. That was the fleeting dream, anyway.
“You’ll never be good enough for him, Maverick,” Aidan continued. “He’ll leave you just like Mom and Dad did. No one stays but me.”
That hit deeper than anything else he’d ever said to me because somewhere in the back of my mind, that terrified, quiet voice wondered if he was right. What if I wasn’t good enough to keep Harley?
Grabbing his beer, he stormed out of the house, the screen door slamming behind him.
The sound rattled the walls, and I flinched.
I stayed exactly where I was, rooted in my spot.
I didn’t trust that he was really gone. My eyes burned hot with tears, a mixture of rage and sadness pressing against the back of my throat.
I forced myself to breathe as I watched the clock.
Five-and-a-half minutes.
That was how long it’d take for him to walk to the front of the park where his friends were. Still, I waited for six minutes to pass just in case. Better safe than sorry.
As soon as those minutes were up, I left.
My chest was tight as I slipped out the back as quietly as I could, so as not to bring attention to myself.
I snuck through the backwoods, avoiding Mr. McCreedy’s dog, and wandering toward the lake to find somewhere to sleep for the night.
I just wanted to be anywhere that Aidan wasn’t.