Chapter 6 Wingman
Chapter six
Wingman
Two days later, Elaine was back at work in the clubhouse. I tried to focus on anything else, but my gaze strayed to her anyway as she moved from one table to the next. Taking orders. Clearing away dishes. Delivering meals and drinks.
Our interactions were brief, polite. And carefully devoid of the flirtation we’d exchanged so easily before.
It didn’t help that the clubhouse was relatively quiet. A handful of bikers trickled in and out, loitering throughout the day. But for the most part, everyone seemed to be sleeping off their carb comas after gorging on Christmas food.
Without sufficient distraction to run interference, Elaine and I crossed paths over and over again. I was always aware of her presence when we were in the same room.
And I couldn’t ignore the fact that Ironside was watching me like a hawk.
The back of my neck prickled and I turned to see him seated on the other side of the bar. One boot propped against the edge of his table. Wreathed in a cloud of cigar smoke. His steady gray eyes were pinned on me.
Rising to my feet, I grabbed my chair and dragged it across the bar, placing it at his table.
“I recognize that look,” I said.
Ironside pulled a deep draw of his cigar and slowly blew a stream of smoke into the air away from me.
“What look?”
“That fatherly look of disapproval saying I shouldn’t do that stupid thing I’m thinking about doing, or I’ll get an ass-whoopin’.”
Ironside chuckled.
“Well, you’re not wrong.”
I waited for him to elaborate, raising my eyebrows expectantly. He sighed, stubbing out his cigar in the ashtray.
“I was the one who hired Elaine,” he said. “I don’t know her whole story, but I know enough. And she had a rough go at the beginning. Stretched too thin. No support, and refused to accept any help from us anyway. I saw you two together at the charity ride on Christmas, so you know about the kid.”
“Mikey,” I said. “He’ll make a mean old man like you one day.”
Ironside huffed.
“Very funny. My point is that you can’t string her along. Either you’re in her life for good. Or you’re out. Don’t pussyfoot about it. She’s a good woman. A gentle soul. I don’t want to see her broken by another man like that ever again.”
I nodded. Ironside had a point, calling me out on what I already knew. There was no reason for me to stay in Juniper Creek. If I wasn’t willing to stick around for Elaine, then it was time to go.
Forty minutes later, I packed my bags and cleared out of my motel. After leaving the key at the front desk, I pulled onto the road, heading for the highway, with my trailer rattling behind me.
Overnight, clouds had rolled in, with a biting wind, and the crisp scent of impending snowfall.
The mountains were shrouded from view in a gray haze, and the temperatures had dropped well below zero.
The harsh winter weather had taken a brief respite for the holiday festivities, and now it returned with a vengeance.
Reaching the outer limits of Juniper Creek, the landscape stretched out before me, with the long, winding road like a black ribbon amid a blanket of white. Endless possibilities awaited me. I could go anywhere I wanted to. Nothing and no one tied me down.
That used to thrill me. I would take a deep breath of relief, knowing that I never had to stay where I wasn’t wanted. I wouldn’t be that trapped, unloved little boy again.
I hit the brakes, skidding to a stop. The car following behind me slammed on their horn and veered around me, speeding by. I ignored them as I kept my gaze locked on the horizon, gripping the steering wheel until my knuckles turned white.
A lump of dread settled in my gut, heavy and cold. All I could think about was Elaine’s larger-than-life belly laugh, so full of joy and love. And Mikey, asleep on her lap, while she gently combed his tousled hair.
For the first time in my life, I didn’t want to leave. I had a reason to stay.
But I had failed so many things and so many people in the past. What if I let Elaine and Mikey down too? I didn’t know a damn thing about being a husband or a father. What if I failed them the way I’d failed everything else?
What if…?
I released my grip on the steering wheel and let my hands slide down into my lap. Tilting my head back against the seat, I closed my eyes.
What if I finally found a place, a home, and a family where I belonged? What if I walked away because I was too chicken shit to give it a shot?
With my heart in my throat, I turned around, speeding back to town as fast as I dared on the slick road.
When I reached the clubhouse, I didn’t bother parking within the lines and jumped out of my car, leaving it idling.
Pushing open the door, I spotted Elaine right away. She glanced up with a look of surprise.
“What will it take?” I said.
She blinked a few times, confused, then continued stacking dishes on her tray. Her face shuttered, carefully guarded, expressionless.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
Bullshit. She knew exactly what I was talking about.
Only a handful of bikers were scattered around the clubhouse early in the afternoon.
But Ironside was there as always. Watching.
Silent. He cut a menacing figure in the corner, with his neatly combed white hair, tattooed collar, dressed all in black.
He looked like a gargoyle, surveying his domain, ready to crack down on anyone who raised hell.
Having this conversation in front of him wouldn’t make things any easier for me.
Marching across the clubhouse, I took Elaine by the wrist and led her into the kitchen. Another waitress was there, leaning back against the counter as she texted on her phone.
“Out,” I said.
She popped her gum with annoyance and shot me a dirty look. Then she stalked off, slapping her hand against the door to shove it open.
At last, Elaine and I were alone.
And the reality of the situation hit me like a freight train.
I was about to surrender my freedom for this woman and her son after meeting her less than a week ago. Even though I was nervous that I would fuck it up, it felt right in a way I’d never experienced before in my life.
“What will it take?” I repeated. “I want to be here. For you and Mikey.”
She frowned and crossed her arms.
“That’s a very nice gesture but—”
“It’s not a gesture, Elaine,” I cut in. “It’s a promise.”
Understanding glimmered in her eyes and she looked away, shifting nervously in place.
“Look, I can’t just…jump into this. I have a child to think about.
I don’t…I haven’t even figured out how I would start dating again with Mikey in the picture.
It’s one thing to put my neck on the line.
But it’s a completely different ball game when I have to make sure my little boy doesn’t get his heart broken. ”
I stepped closer, clasping her hands. Her concerns were understandable. But they didn’t scare me off. They didn’t make me second guess my decision to stay.
“Tell me how I can prove it to you,” I said. “I’ll sell my bike. I’ll build you a house. Hell, I’ll run for mayor if that would make you believe me.”
Elaine shook her head, rocking back on her heels like she was preparing to escape. I cupped her face in my palms and looked in her eyes.
“I have nothing to lose, sweetheart. But I have everything to gain. I’ve never felt this way—I’ve never even wanted a steady life with anyone else until I met you and that little mobster kid with the mean mug.”
She managed a faint, wet laugh, curling her fingers around my wrists. I took that as a good sign. Instead of running away or turning me down, she was holding onto me just like I was holding onto her.
“Give me a chance,” I whispered. “I’ll work my fingers to the bone for you and that kid, as long as I live.
I wish I could say that I’ll be a good husband to you, and a better father to Mikey than my old man was to me.
But the truth is…I’m flying blind, baby.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I’ll try though. I’ll give it everything I’ve got.”
Elaine swallowed hard as she shifted closer, sliding her arms inside my cut and around my waist.
“What changed your mind?”
“Because of you,” I replied. “I looked at that open road I used to love so much and it didn’t hold a candle to the way I felt about you and Mikey.
I’m terrified I don’t have enough to offer you, Elaine.
It scares the shit out of me that I’ll try—just like I tried with everything else in my life—and it won’t be enough. ”
Her eyes softened and her grip tightened on me.
“The fact that you want to stay for us is more than we’ve had already,” she said quietly. Then she sighed and pulled back, smoothing her palms over my chest. “But I have to talk to Mikey first. This will be a big change for him.”
“Where is he now?”
“At the neighbor’s house. She babysits him while I’m at work. I’ll pick him up after my shift tonight.”
“Would you mind if I bribed you two with dinner?” I replied.
She raised her eyebrows.
“You can cook?”
I hedged.
“Not exactly. But I can whip up some takeout that tastes pretty incredible, if I do say so myself.”
Elaine’s eyes brightened as she hummed a little laugh. Then she rose up on her tiptoes and kissed me with a smile on her lips.
“That sounds wonderful.”
I blew out a breath of relief as I rested my forehead against hers. Sliding my hands into the back pockets of her jeans, I cupped her ass and pulled her curves flush against me.
That’s because no one wants you, boy.
It turns out my father was wrong. The old bastard must be rolling in his grave while I held the woman of my dreams in my arms.