18. Harper
Chapter 18
Harper
I let Jude get a good lead on me before I head inside. It takes me longer than him to get back to the school’s main hallway because I don’t dare cut through the boys’ locker room, just in case he’s waiting there for me. I hurry past the lockers, making a beeline for the parking lot without bothering to stop at my locker first. Whatever’s in there can fucking stay in there until Monday.
“Harper? Harper!”
I freeze in my tracks, and grudgingly glance back. Eliza is on her way over to me. I could keep on walking, but I don’t want to be rude to the only person in school who’s actually spoken to me, other than Talia so I stay where I am and wait for her to fall in step with me.
“Hey, so, Jude was looking for you. Did he find you?”
I’m suddenly uncomfortably aware that I’m not wearing underwear. I never realized how much contact there is down there without all that cotton in the way. Fighting an encroaching blush, I shrug. “Yeah, thanks.”
“It’s just, he looked...” She hums as she thinks. “Worried?”
Yeah, Eliza, I wouldn’t know how the fuck to describe that expression of his either. Worry, concern, though...that’s grasping.
I say nothing because his threat comes back to haunt me. I doubt Eliza could find out what happened out there, but I don’t want to give Jude a single reason to terrorize me.
“You coming to the game tonight?”
So I can watch Jude strut his stuff on the field? Fuck him.
“No.”
Eliza gasps like I’ve legitimately just shocked her pom-poms off.
“But...why?”
“Because I have better ways to spend the evening,”...is what I should have said. But what comes out is, “I’m helping my mom with this charity fundraiser thing.” I roll my eyes. “I mean, I’d love to?—”
“Oh my God, the Feast of Ashes?” Eliza’s eyes brighten up. “I’m so fucking jealous.” She grins and gives me a friendly punch on my shoulder. “Hey, if you need any help with that you let me know. I’ve been dying to get on that committee.”
She could have been speaking Mandarin for all the sense she’s making. So I nod and step hesitantly away. She waves at me, that same big grin still plastered on her face. I’m a yard away when she calls out, “Oh, and forget about Talia’s hundred bucks.”
I spin back to face her. “What?”
She waves away my concern with a flick of her wrist. “It’s on me.”
I’m still so fucking confused when I get into Jude’s truck that I don’t even look at him. I guess he takes it as submission or something because, after one long look in my direction, he keeps his eyes on the road for the rest of the drive home.
I should be relieved, but instead I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.
The urge to raid the pool house bar keeps building on the drive, but I can’t imagine what he’d do if Jude saw me headed in that direction. So instead I lock myself in my room until my mom gets home. Thankfully I only have three hours to wait, and for once I get some homework done.
I quickly finish up an assignment after I hear her car pulling into the drive and head downstairs. She’s in the kitchen preparing supper, which is weird because I’m pretty sure Wayne told Jude that they had a thing tonight, that’s why he couldn’t come to Jude’s football game.
“Aren’t you guys going out?” I ask, coming to stand nearby as she chops vegetables on the granite countertop.
“Why? You want to throw a party?” Despite her words, there’s a hint of a smile on Mom’s mouth when she glances over at me. I lean over and grab a discarded carrot top, nibbling on it as we talk.
“That’s what Wayne told Jude the other day.”
“We are,” Mom says and then points at a bowl of cubed steak. “This is for you kids.”
I almost choke on my carrot. She’s making food just for us? I was lucky if I got a PB and J sandwich for supper if Mom wasn’t going to be home for dinner. Resentment swirls inside me, and it’s a fucking effort to push it down. But I remind myself why I’m here, and that keeps me from exploding.
“That’s...nice.” I power through, hoping she didn’t notice the hitch in my voice. “So, uh, Mom...what’s this about an Ash Feast or something?”
She turns to me wearing a frown, her knife suspended in the air. “Ash Feast?”
“Yeah. I think that’s the name.” I wave my carrot top. “The girls at school were talking about it.”
“Oh, the Feast of Ashes.” Mom shrugs and goes back to chopping. “It’s a big holiday around here. Wayne’s company is involved with the fundraising, I think.”
“That sounds cool.”
She uses the back of her hand to rub her nose. “Why do you ask?” she adds, sending me a suspicious glance.I can’t blame her. I’ve never shown interest in anything so to be asking her this out of the blue is weird, even for me.
“Honestly...?” I move a little closer, dropping my voice. “It’s like a really big deal at school. The girls in my class won’t stop talking about it. I thought it might be cool if I could...I dunno...help out, maybe?”
Mom stops chopping, staring straight ahead for a second before turning to me. “That’s a fantastic idea.” Then she smiles.
I can’t remember when last I saw that smile. I might have been five years old. My heart stutters in my chest, and suddenly I’m blinking back tears.
Is she...proud of me?
“Yeah, I mean, it’ll look good on my college applications, right?” I blurt out, trying to get rid of this unfamiliar feeling inching through me. I wave vaguely and drop my half-nibbled carrot back on the heap of vegetable scraps. “But if there are already enough people?—”
“College?” Mom’s voice is a whisper. “You...want to go to college?”
“Uh...yeah. I guess.” I shrug, my cheeks starting to heat up from the shocked look on my mother’s face.
Gees, you’d swear I was a fucking degenerate. Why is she so shocked that I’m thinking more than a day ahead? For the first time in my life, I think I might have a future. There’s been no point considering stuff like this before.
“Oh, honey, that’s... yes , of course you can help out. I don’t care if Wayne has to fire half his employees, you’re going to be part of it.” Her smile hitches up, and she almost looks like she wants to hug me.
“Uhm....”
Her expression falters. “What?”
“Can you get my friend in too?”
My mom’s lips purse into a tight smile, and she gives me a quick nod. “On one condition.”
“Sure.”
“I want to meet her.” Then she blinks. “Or him.”
“I’ll invite her over next week,” I say, grinning. “Do you need a hand?”
I’ve offered before since we’ve moved in here, but she usually chases me out the moment I don’t do something right. But tonight she just gives me another warm smile and steps aside, pointing at a bowl of peas.
“Could you shuck those for me?”
“Maybe…if I knew what the hell that was.”
She laughs, puts her knife down, and grabs one of the peas. “Here, I’ll show you.”
We laugh as I fumble through my first attempt, but it’s easy after that. Minutes later, I feel someone watching me. I peek over my shoulder, flinching when I see Jude standing in the doorway. He’s wearing jeans and his letterman jacket. There’s a scowl on his face that disappears the moment my mom turns to see what I’m looking at.
“Off to the game?” she asks.
Jude gives her a barely civil nod and leaves, his duffle bag thumping against his back when he tosses it over his shoulder.
Mom gives me a theatrical shudder. “Don’t tell Wayne, but that boy gives me the creeps sometimes.”