6. Ryder
“Wow,” I whispered to myself more than her.
I can see now that the dress was a great choice. She is radiant. The bodice of her dress fits her form without being overly snug. The lace, as delicate as she is. The hues of gold compliment her auburn hair. She is even more beautiful now with the afternoon sun peering through the stained glass windows. It’s as if I’m seeing her for the first time, yet as familiar as coming home.
She sat at her mirror and our eyes locked through the reflection. For a moment a wave of déjá vu crashes over me, though I’m not sure I’ve ever had the privilege of gazing directly into eyes so angelic. I surely would have remembered.
“Did you come for me?” she asked, breaking our silence and standing. Her voice danced across the space between us and straight to places I didn’t know still existed in me. “Is it time?” she pushes when I don’t answer.
“You must be the bride,” I clear my throat, trying to recover.
I wanted to see her before the ceremony, but I hadn’t thought about what would happen once I crossed this threshold.
The corner of her mouth perks, “Nothing gets past you,” she says almost playfully, “and you are?”
“I’m Ryder. Ryder Totaro.”
“Oh, you’re Philippe’s older brother.” She says matter of fact and makes her way to the small sofa to sit while she adjusts her sleeves over her wrists. Twice she’s done that now.
“Uh, yeah. Have you met him?” Where would she have met Philippe?
“No, I wanted to wait until the big day.” I raise an eyebrow, perplexed by her statement. I think there has been some confusion. “This isn’t a traditional marriage, so I figured it doesn’t really matter who my betrothed is. He didn’t want to see me either,” she continues, but there is sadness behind her smile.
She’s wrong. I have spent the last six days pining over her. Fighting every urge to see her.
“I don’t think your groom didn’t want to see you,” I assured her, “six days isn’t much time to get your affairs in order before your life changes.”
“You’re right,” she sighed, “Can I tell you something?” her large green eyes turn cautious. She’s testing me.
“Of course,” Fuck, tell me everything just so I can listen to your sweet voice.
I make my way to the footstool across from her and sit, our knees almost touching.
“I’m about to marry a stranger. In most places on earth, that is completely insane,” She babbles on, “But I’m kind of . . . excited?” she finally confesses, tugging at the sleeves around her wrists. Three.
“Is that a question?”
“My sister convinced me when we were younger that fear is actually excitement, so I sometimes have trouble deciding which one I’m feeling,” she informs me.
I’m an asshole, but I can’t let on that I know more than I do. “Is she here? Your sister?”
Her head tilts to the right with an unspoken question. “No. She’s gone.” Her face becomes unreadable and she doesn’t offer any further explanation.
“That’s unfortunate.” I mean it. “You get to marry one of the most eligible bachelors in Boston and you’ll carry the Totaro name. There are worse things that could happen.” I leaned forward on my elbows clasping her fidgeting hands in hers. “Welcome to the family,” I grin. “We are excited to have you.”
“Thanks,” she hides a blush and her eyes shift to avoid mine. “I lost most of my family a long time ago. I’m sure you know my brother, Declan. He’s all I have left. I think he is the only person here that I know.”
Someone unknowingly could mistake her words for self-pity, but they are laced with a shield of armor. Armor I hope to one day shatter.
I take a moment to ponder. I should come clean about what is about to happen. But something tells me she needs a reason to laugh. Hell, this entire situation is laughable. Do people arrange-marry each other anymore? Am I any better than a man ordering a wife online? I even paid for her. . . I wonder if she knows about that.
This will all have to be discussed at another time. “Well, now you know me.” I stand and give her a wink. “If you get nervous, just look at me. I promise you won’t be up there alone.”
She lets out a chuckle and my breath catches in my throat. A simple melody I didn’t know my heart needed. I make a mental note to put all of my secondary priorities on hold until I can find a reason to ruin Ms. Sullivan because I can’t think of anything other than tossing her in a cage and throwing away the key. I want to keep her forever.
“I’ll see you out there.” She stands and I give her hands a slight squeeze before letting them go and turning to leave.
“You’ll do great, little sparrow.” I don’t know why I fucking said that but I leave before I could see her reaction.
Now I need to decide if I want to clip her wings or watch her fly.