29. Devina
Wicked Game - Lusaint
A hand lands on my shoulder making me jump.
“Good evening, Devina. How rude of my son to leave you alone,” Cap takes an uninvited seat next to me.
“He is looking for his brothers. Shop talk, I guess.” My blood is boiling under my skin.
“Well, I’m glad I get a moment with you alone. I wanted you to know that I was very pleased with the arrangement your family made with us. My son seems to be happy and I’d do anything for my children.”
Scarlet was having one of your children.I bite my teeth together to keep the words from slipping out.
“If there is anything that you need, I hope you know you can always ask,” he says, gliding the back of his fingers up my exposed scar.
I stand abruptly, disgusted by his forwardness. I look around the room trying to maintain my composure.
“Thank you, Cap. I think I’d better go find Ryder. Have a nice evening.”
My knuckles turn white from clasping my clutch as I bolt from the table. Taylor’s key chain sits safely inside but I’m not ready to pull the trigger. I didn’t think I could hate that man more than I already did, but there appears to be no limit to how grotesque he can be.
I pick up another glass of champagne from a passing waiter and make my way to the hall behind the bar where I last saw Ryder.
The sound of hushed voices makes me stop.
“How’s married life, brother?”
“Better than I thought” Ryder replies, and I can’t help but smile. Maybe in another world, we would have a happily ever after. But in this one, maybe we can settle for a happy until it’s over. I take a step to round the corner and stop.
“That so? So, are you saying you aren’t going through with the plan?”
“Look, I think that needs to be revisited at another time. She isn’t who I thought she’d be.”
Now I’m intrigued. I can feel my body heat and my breath get caught in my throat.
“She got to you. You’re going soft.” Luca accuses with an airy laugh.
“I knew you weren’t going to break her,” Philippe chuckles. “Well, as much as I would have liked to see Declan torn down when his baby sister is delivered in a broken pile of rubble and his company gone, I’m glad you took my advice. Who knows man, maybe it’s all for the best.”
Luca’s eyes shift past Ryder causing him to turn and see me. I can’t hide the shock from betrayal.
“Dev-” He takes a step towards me but I back away and turn to leave.
God, I’m so stupid. Of course, Ryder wanted to hurt Declan. I don’t know why he wants to hurt him but at least I know now why he agreed to this arrangement. He didn’t want me for an alliance. He wanted me for leverage. He wanted to hurt my brother. He wanted to hurt me.
I try to make my way to the closest side door but I know he’s on my heels. Stepping out into the dark alley I let the cool night air shoot through my lungs as I inhale deeply. The door slams behind me, but I know I’m not alone. His hand pulls me back by the arm until I’m pushed against the door that was supposed to lead me to freedom.
“Sparrow, look at me” I can’t.
“Jesus, Devina. Please look at me.” The desperation in his voice sends a crack through my heart.
I meet his stare with fire, and I wish it would burn him. “I have nothing to say to you. I feel so stupid right now. You said this was real, Ryder, but it looks like I wasn’t the only one keeping secrets,” my voice cracks.
“Please let me take you home and I can explain everything. You don’t know what has happened until you let me. What you heard probably sounds really fucking bad.”
I reach to pull down my sleeve but realize I’m not wearing any.
I feel used, exposed, so vulnerable. He can sense my urge and draws his fingers up my scarred arm. I try to pull away but his chest is pushing into mine. I can’t keep the tears from falling.
“Please” I beg, “Just let me go.”
“Devina.” His voice grave as fingers find my chin and force my face back to his, “I can’t let you go. I’ll never let you go.”
“Why not?” I breathe out.
“How can I let you go when you consume my every thought?” He speaks in a low, grave voice making the hair on the back of my neck stand at attention, “You infuriate me. You make me want to fucking scream and for some reason, you can’t see yourself the way that I see you, which drives me insane.”
“And how is it that you see me?” I’m genuinely curious now.
“You are perfection, sparrow. You are worthy. You captivate me.” My heart wants to believe him, but my mind refuses. “I am so fucking in love with you, can’t you see that?” His eyes shift back and forth searching mine. “And you love me too.”
I try to swallow the lump in my throat. No way am I going to admit that. Not now, not ever. If I never say the words out loud, I can believe that it’s not true.
I get a second wind and let out a weak laugh. “Love me! Love me? You don’t even like me. You wanted to use me! And then what? Send me back to Declan? Kill me? I’m nothing to you, Ryder.”
“Dammit Devina,” I jump when his hand slams against the wall beside my head. “You misheard me. I love you. I love you.”
His lips devour mine in a possessive kiss and I hate myself for reciprocating. Every part of my mind is screaming for me to run and never look back. But the heat in my core is pulling me closer to him. I’ve never felt more at war with myself, because as much as I hate Ryder right now, I melt so effortlessly into him.
His hand releases my face only to wrap around me pulling me impossibly close. Even in heels, I can only reach the back of his neck as he leans over me, but my fingers latch on just as enthusiastically as his do. Fire blazes between us and I’m not sure if it’s love or hate fueling us.
This is the type of fire that burns deep, and I know I can’t come out the other side unscathed.
He breaks away, my chest heaving against his, and his eyes search mine for forgiveness. I can’t let him know he will always receive that from me.
Instead, I have one demand, “Prove it.”
* * *
As we make our way out of the elevator to the garage my fingers brush his and he smiles to himself as he takes my hand in his, swiping his thumb across my knuckles. Fuck, make me swoon why don’t you. I’m still mad. How can I ever trust him again? But as mad as I am, he does something to me that I can’t explain.
He’s a fucking drug to me. Poison. With every kiss I need him more, the high something I’ve never tasted before.
Sal and Ronnie trail behind us as we make our way to the cars when a shot rings through the parking garage.
In one swift movement, Ryder pushes me back and releases my hand, using his other to grab the gun situated at his back. He aims and squeezes the trigger without hesitation.
I crouch with my knees to my chest too scared to peek around the tires of the jeep that is keeping me very much alive at the moment. How does he know where to shoot? I didn’t see a soul in that garage with us.