Chapter 10 #2
Bazel made some sort of noise. He wasn’t sure what it meant, but Atlas seemed to know what to do.
He tugged off the pair of jeans they had bought together and dropped them on the floor.
Bazel wanted to jump off the bed and properly care for the clothing, since it was all he had, but Atlas nuzzled him right through the underwear that had come from the same trip, and he forgot all about anything other than his lips and the heat that nearly sent him through the ceiling.
“Did you like that?”
“Yes. Do not stop.” He ran his fingers through Atlas’s soft hair, holding his head as he moaned softly.
“I promised I wouldn’t, and I meant it.” Atlas was growly now, and Bazel realized that was so good. It meant that Atlas was as caring, protective, and generous now as always. “I will keep this up until you go out of your mind.”
“What that mean?” Bazel asked. It sounded kind of bad.
“That I want you so happy and head-spinny with passion that you forget about everything else. That I want you to be the happiest I can possibly make you.” He tugged at the waistband of Bazel’s briefs, and Bazel held his breath in almost wild anticipation as he held onto the bedding, wondering what was coming next.
BAZEL WAS breathless as he lay next to Atlas, his eyes closed, hands roaming over Atlas’s slightly furred chest. Atlas had driven him to the point where Bazel could barely see straight, and he had only used his mouth.
That was one heck of an experience. “How can anyone think that could be bad?” Bazel finally asked.
“There is plenty of bad sex,” Atlas said softly.
“That not what I mean,” Bazel said, and rolled onto his side so he could look at Atlas in all his manly glory. He had always been so furtive, so careful about where he looked and who he watched, that being able to look his fill was almost mind-blowing.
Atlas chuckled. “I know. I was teasing you.” He tugged Bazel closer. “You were amazing, babe. You really were.”
“But you do all the work,” Bazel said, wondering if it was always this way.
Did the stronger of the men play the man’s role always?
Was that how things worked? Bazel didn’t want to feel like he was less than a man, and yet if Atlas made him feel like he was going to fly into a million happy pieces every time, then he was not going to complain.
“This time. There will be more. I promise you that.”
“And I can be the man?” he asked.
Atlas smoothed his hand over his cheek. “It isn’t about who does what or that there is a man role or not.
It’s just about two people expressing their feelings for each other.
That’s what matters. And I thought that you didn’t have much experience, so I took the lead, but it will be different each time.
That’s the wonderful thing. It’s only about being happy. ”
Bazel sighed. “I happy.” And he was, so very happy at the moment.
A shrill bark made them both sit up and listen. Another followed, and Atlas jumped out of bed and pulled on his clothes before racing out of the room. “Remember what I told you.” Then he was gone.
Bazel jumped out of bed, retrieved his clothes from where Atlas had strewn then, and pulled them on.
Then he peered out the bedroom door, listening.
But the house was quiet. He left the room and went to the one he had been using, carefully looking out the window into the backyard.
A man tore across the grass toward the gate with Evie right behind him.
“Take down!” Atlas yelled, and Evie leapt as the man jumped for the gate.
He didn’t make it. Evie had him by the leg, and Bazel heard the cry in the house as the man fell from the gate.
Evie stood over him, growling and barking at the top of her lungs while Atlas hurried up.
It all happened so fast, but it seemed that whoever had been trying to find him hadn’t given up.
Maybe he was no longer safe here, and as much as he wanted to stay with Atlas, it might be time he left.
“WHAT ARE you doing?” Atlas asked when he came back in, once the intruder had been taken into custody and transported to the station, finding Bazel in his room. He had changed into the ill-fitting clothes he had arrived in. They had been washed.
“I have to go.” He had left all the things Atlas had bought for him stacked and folded neatly on the bed. Maybe they could be used to help someone else. “These men, they want me, and I am putting you and Evie in danger. I cannot do that. If I gone, they leave you alone.”
Atlas’s eyes blazed, and Bazel stepped back in case he got mad. His father hit when he got that way. “You realize they will find you one way or another. Then you’ll be in danger and no one will be there to look out for you.” His voice was harsh and rough.
“I know. I take care of me and keep you safe.” He looked around the room. “It best I not be here.” He hated the thought of leaving. It tore at him. Nobody made him feel like Atlas did… and that was the problem. He couldn’t bear having Atlas hurt because of him, but it was so hard to explain.
Atlas crossed his arms over his chest. “I know what you’re doing, and it’s bullshit.
And you know it. That man has nothing to do with you.
I arrested him last year after a six-month investigation.
He was running drugs through town, and I took him out.
Apparently he got out on parole and decided to come after me. He’s going back to prison.”
Bazel swallowed. “He not here because of me?”
“No. This had nothing to do with you. Police officers make a lot of enemies, and sometimes they aren’t exactly right in the head. This man is crazy. I think he sold drugs and used his own product and it hurt his brain.”
“Oh,” he said softly, looking at the clothes. “So I can stay?” He had been so scared, he had let his fear make his decisions for him.
Atlas kept his arms crossed over his chest. “There are going to be some rules.” Bazel swallowed.
“First, no leaving without talking to me first. I have lots of friends on the force, and if you are in danger, we will find a place to keep you safe. Second, when you’re scared, you can talk to me about it. You don’t have to do this alone.”
“And three?” He blinked at how mad Atlas looked, and then he smiled. “You have to remember that you are wanted here. But if you really want to go, the door is always open. Just make sure it’s what you really want, not what you’re afraid of.”
Bazel nodded. “I just so frightened. What if you or Evie get hurt because of me?”
“First thing, if anyone does get hurt, it’s because of the people doing the hurting, not you or me. So don’t take on something that isn’t your fault. It’s theirs. That’s the trap.”
Bazel didn’t understand at all. “Huh?”
“If you take on the responsibility for their actions, then you let them off the hook. Do you see?” Bazel shook his head because he still didn’t understand. “Okay. You are responsible for what you do, not what someone else does,” Atlas told him gently.
“So what these men do isn’t my fault.” He said the words as though he were trying to convince himself as much as anything else. “But… what they want from me?”
“Today had nothing to do with you at all. And we have Wendell in custody now. Apparently he’s wanted in Florida as well as by the federal government, so he isn’t going to be going anywhere for a while.
The various departments are looking into the trafficking further, but progress is slow.
The federal agencies are hoping to catch them once the ship comes back into port. ”
“What does all that mean?” Bazel asked.
“That us finding you here in Carlisle is a smaller piece of a larger picture. We need to keep you safe while the other departments figure out what is happening. It stinks, because I really want to be able to have all the answers, and I can’t right now.
Though I want you to know that you have helped a lot. ”
Bazel was feeling more comfortable now, his heart pounding a lot less, and he could think.
“So you….” He didn’t quite know what to say.
Bazel wanted things to feel like they had before the man tried to get in, before he got so scared and made a fool of himself.
He really felt kind of dumb. “You not mad?”
Atlas grinned and shook his head. “No. I’m not mad. I wish that idiot would have thought before trying to break into a policeman’s house. I can make a call and have my fellow officers here very quickly. I’m also pissed because he interrupted us.”
“Me too.” But he just couldn’t seem to get what happened out of his mind. It was like it was always there, the fear and the worry, waiting like a weed for the chance to grow. That was far too hard for him to explain. Sometimes he just didn’t have the words.
“This is a lot for you to take in right now, and you probably need a chance to think.”
Bazel nodded. That he did. Atlas’s hands slipped off his shoulders, and Bazel instantly missed them. “Don’t go.” He sighed, and Atlas returned, sliding his hands around his waist and just standing with him. “It easier to think with you here.”
“Why is that?” Atlas whispered.
“Because I feel safe,” he answered, as honestly as he could. If Bazel had left, he had no idea where he would have gone or how he would have gotten anywhere. It was all fear that was trying to make the decisions—the wrong ones.