Chapter 16 #3
Drust grinned back at her, but he knew his control was slipping.
He had meant to stay away, to be so honorable as to wait for a wedding night.
When he gave up on honor and slipped into her room, he meant to make love to her slowly and tenderly, to show her with his body how precious she was.
Now he realized slowly and tenderly would have to wait for another time.
His body was burning, on fire. His restraint had abandoned him.
He had already gone past any rules of decorum and straight into a frenzy of passion that demanded he claim his woman.
Try not to hurt her… try… But she was digging her nails into his back, spurring him to even greater wildness.
When she reached for the hem of his shirt, he tore it over his head, loath to break away from the heat of her mouth.
His hands flew to the ties of his breeches, fumbling desperately for a moment before freeing the laces and kicking them off.
Now he knelt above her, naked, so overwhelmed by the intensity of his emotions that for a moment he couldn’t move.
He stared down at Willa, his chest heaving to take in enough air his limbs trembling with passion and anticipation.
She was beautiful, so beautiful. And all his.
How had he ever come to deserve so much?
Willa watched him as he loomed above her, all beautiful, wild male.
His cock jutted out before him, huge and full and throbbing.
He looked down at her, his eyes hazy with lust, his pupils black even in the dim light.
She reached out her hand to touch him, drawing her finger gently across the slit at the tip of his manhood.
His head fell back and he growled deep in his throat.
His hands closed convulsively on her breasts and his whole body shuddered.
Never had she felt more powerful than in this moment.
“Willa… God! I canna… wait… I… need…”
Holding his desperate gaze, she let her legs fall wide, instinct taking over. She was wet and ready for him, and overcome with the need to be claimed by the one man who would complete her. He lowered his body to cover hers, the head of his cock slipping easily into her waiting body.
“Ah, Willa! It feels too good! I canna control it… I…”
With a groan of pleasure torn from his very soul, he drove into her hard, breaking her barrier and filling her completely in one long thrust. She cried out at the stab of pain, but his mouth was on hers in an instant, stopping the sound with an insistent kiss.
Though he wanted to give her a moment to adjust to him, Drust was unable to keep still.
His hips began to rock against hers, instinctively seeking an even greater pleasure.
He thrust as gently as he could, sweat breaking out on his body with the effort of his restraint.
His mouth moved to her breast, suckling at a taught nipple until she arched her back and her hips began to move with his, seeking a rhythm that her body already knew.
Was born knowing. Higher and higher he took her, until she was clenching him tight within her body, wrapping her legs around him to draw him back to her again and again. Almost… so close! So much pleasure…
Drust felt her body tighten. Hold on… not yet…
too soon! He could not wait much longer.
The pressure was building low in his spine, his balls unbelievably tight and aching.
He was going to come so hard… harder than he ever dreamed possible.
He slipped a hand between them, one finger finding that sensitive place just above where their bodies met.
He touched it gently, once, twice, and was rewarded with Willa’s soft cry of ecstasy as she came around him, squeezing him, milking him, and sending him even closer to the edge.
Desperate for release, he pounded into her faster and harder, losing himself, out of his mind with need.
There was only instinct left. Everything around him faded until there was nothing but the frantic joining of their bodies, only the torturous pressure building, tightening in his loins.
Until it came to the very peak, and then he was exploding, falling.
A pleasure so intense it was almost pain. He threw his head back and roared.
“Willa! Ah, God!” He heard her name on his lips as he pumped his seed into her, until finally he dropped his forehead down to hers, his hips still thrusting, though more slowly, more gently now.
It was several more moments before his breaths slowed enough that he could gather her into his arms and roll to his side with her.
“Och, Love, did I hurt ye too badly?” He reached a hand up to push damp strands of hair away from her face. She gave him a tender, contented smile, and he smiled in return. Truly, he felt as if he had just conquered the world.
“No, only good pain. That was… that was more than I could have dreamed and more.” At loss for words, she leaned closer to place kisses along his jaw and he held her even tighter.
They woke to the light of early dawn, and the sounds of the castle waking.
Drust feathered soft kisses over her lips, determined to ignore his raging morning erection, at least this once.
After they were wed, he would be taking advantage every day, but today, he needed to slip away before someone found him here in Willa’s bed. Namely her brother.
It was all he could do to pull himself away from her drowsy warmth.
She sat up as he left the bed, letting the sheet fall to reveal her perfect breasts.
Looking at her like that, so ripely feminine, he almost wished he could one day see her suckling his child there.
But no! He would never take the chance. Last night he had spilled himself within her, so far gone with lust he couldn’t have pulled out if he wanted to.
But that had been their first time, his passionate claiming of her as his woman.
Next time it would be easier. He would not make the same mistake twice.
To lose her now… no, he could not even think of it.
“Where are you going?” she asked, stretching her graceful arms above her head.
He grinned at her. “I’m sneaking out of yer bedchamber before I get caught.”
She laughed and peered under the sheet. “I think someone is bound to know you were here.”
Pulling the pale linen away, she revealed the tell-tale smudges of blood. “And that you deflowered your bride before the wedding night”, she told him brightly.
She watched as his face split into a wide grin. He looked almost proud of himself, the arrogant man!
“I’m verra happy to have been the lucky man to deflower ye lass.” He leaned in for another lingering kiss. “And I’ll send Glenna up after the bedding. She seems verra discreet.
***
Or perhaps not so discreet. He had to wonder by the way James had been sending him killing looks all through dinner.
Maura kept elbowing him in the ribs and scolding him, but it didn’t seem to help his temper.
And then there was the way all the maids were looking at him and tittering to each other beneath their hands.
He sighed, glad that they would be leaving soon.
As soon as the meal ended, he stole Willa away. They walked through the gardens near the keep, because Drust thought it would be an unnecessary risk to go any further. He looked down at her, squeezing her small hand in his.
“I can hardly believe that I will have a wife. Ye are everything I never kenned I needed, lass.”
She smiled up at him. “And you are everything I always knew I wanted.”
“Ye wanted a stubborn, damaged man who kens no’ a thing about being a husband?”
“No. A strong, honorable man who will be a wonderful husband and father.”
Drust suddenly went still beside her. “Husband, aye, I will do my best. But I willna be a father.”
“Oh”. Willa could hardly keep the hurt and disappointment from her voice. He didn’t want children? What man didn’t at least want strong sons to stand by his side? She couldn’t believe what he was saying.
“You do want children someday, though?”
“No, never.”
Those two words tore through her like a knife.
Willa had always wanted a family and children of her own, and she had spent considerable time over the last several weeks imagining what Drust’s babies would look like, and what a good father he’d be.
How could she not have known he didn’t even want a family? She had just assumed…
“But… why not?”
She thought that his eyes took on a faraway look, as if remembering something from long ago.
“I have no desire to be a father. I am a warrior, and right hand to my brother Bren. He will have the heirs. And his wife is already expecting.”
He looked down at her then, and he must have seen the hurt in her eyes, because he softened his stance and pulled her closer.
“Lass, I want to spend the rest of my days with ye, just ye and I together. I would give ye the world. Ye have me so deep under yer spell that I could never break free. But I canna give ye my child, so dinna ask me again, I dinna wish to speak of it.”
Willa looked at the ground and narrowed her eyes.
She knew there was more to all this than he was telling her; he was afraid of something.
And she also knew that she had time to convince him otherwise.
She would let it go, for now. Besides, with any luck, she could already be carrying his child.
And if her dream last night was any indication, she was.
She had heard women often had dreams just after they conceived, as if to welcome the new life that their body nurtured.
Last night she had dreamt of a sweet baby boy, with his father’s fathomless eyes and wavy brown hair. Her heart melted at the thought.
Drust slipped his hand under her chin and lifted her face to kiss her.
He probably hoped the sexual heat between them would make her forget what had just been said.
She swayed against him as his lips touched hers, desperate as always to be closer.
But she wasn’t going to forget. She wanted a child one day, and she wanted Drust to be the one to give her that child.
He was just going to have to change his mind.
He was still kissing her, making her whole body burn with need. “Come to me tonight”, she whispered against his lips.
“That would be wrong”, he said, teasing her. “Ye are a lady and we’re no’ wed.”
She smiled. “But I am a widow, and as such I can take any number of lovers and most people will look the other way”, she teased back.
But when she looked up to see why he hadn’t answered, she was taken aback by his thunderous expression.
Startled, she took a step back. His grip on her tightened, and he pulled her back to him.
“If I ever find another man in your bed”, he said though clenched teeth, “I will kill him. You are mine and mine alone. I will not stand for even the thought of you with someone else. Never.”
Willa would not have guessed even a week ago that Drust would be such a jealous man.
“For weeks”, she told him, trying but failing to pull away from his grip, “I tried everything to let you know I wanted you, and you could not stay far enough away. Am I to believe that now, quite suddenly, you have not only completely changed your mind, but also think that you own me?”
“Aye.”
“I see.”
“No, ye dinna see. I wanted ye from the very first, Willa. From the moment I opened my eyes and saw ye there. I wanted ye more than I had ever wanted anything before. But I fought against it, because I… I sensed that there was more. That what was between us was like nothing else I had ever felt. I never wanted a wife, and my every instinct was telling me that if I gave in to my feelings for ye, it could lead to nothing less than marriage. But now I ken the truth… I never wanted any other woman for a wife, because ye are the only one that fits me so well. With ye, I am finally whole. That’s why ye are mine and mine alone. ”
Willa leaned closer and kissed him again.
***
Drust had never opened his heart to anyone, and he felt as if he had poured out his very soul to Willa earlier.
He had expected it would make him feel uneasy, vulnerable.
But instead he felt full, nearly bursting with a happiness he never even knew he was capable of feeling.
And now, as he crept up the dark stairway to her room, his need for her bordered on desperation.
Last night had been a frenzied coming-together of both body and soul, but tonight…
tonight he would go slow. Savor every moment.
He found the door unlocked. She had been waiting for him.
She was lying on the large bed, asleep. A single candle left burning on the table bathed her in a soft, flickering light.
He closed the door softly behind him, not wanting to wake her just yet.
He moved to the bed and looked down at her as she slept.
So beautiful. So fragile. It was still so new to him, the very idea of a woman of his own, and a part of him still panicked at the thought.
But the rest of him just wanted to hold onto her and never let go.
He reached out and drew his fingers over her cheek, and she sighed in her sleep.
Smiling, he quickly stripped out of his clothes and lowered himself onto the bed beside her.
He brought his arms around her, pulling her up against his body, pressing his aching cock firmly against her bottom.
His mouth found the soft hollow of her throat and he kissed and nipped her there as she woke.
“Mmmmm… Drust… hi”, she murmured and stretched against him, and he smiled.
He reached around to cup one of her breasts in his hand, squeezing gently. He groaned and pulled her onto her back so that he could reach both breasts at once. His lips found hers and drew her into a deep, carnal kiss as he shifted his body over hers and ground his cock against her hips.
God, it felt so good! He needed more… No, go slow.
He reached up to untie the ribbon at her throat, and pulled the edges of her shift down over her breasts.
Oh this was bloody torture! He lowered his mouth to a nipple and pulled at it, gently at first, then harder as Willa gasped and arched her hips against his.
It drove him wild. He sucked again… her hips rose, and he groaned.
Only the thin fabric of the shift was between him and what he wanted most. He was so hard, so ready.
With one hand, he lifted her hem and traced his fingers up the soft skin of her thigh until he met the wet heat that told him she was just as ready for him.
He touched her there, teasing, then pressing one finger inside her core.
She whimpered and her fingers pressed into his arms where she gripped him.
“Please, Drust… oh god… I need you.”
He touched her again, at the same time capturing her mouth, kissing her wildly. Every primal male instinct he had was screaming at him to drive into her, quickly drowning out all conscious thought.
Not yet… too soon…
But Willa pulled her shift higher, and moved her hips so that now the head of his cock slid against her opening.
The little vixen. Drust’s breathing was ragged, and his body trembled with the effort it was taking to control the urge to thrust forward.
I was going to take it slow… She arched against him, and just like that, he was lost. He drove into her with an animal growl and held himself there for a moment, deep inside of her.
This is what it feels like, to be truly bound to another soul, to share your body, and your heart. It was ecstasy.
He moved within her, and she gasped, raising her legs to wrap them around his buttocks, pulling him deeper. Drust groaned and his body shook with the effort to hold back. He wanted to thrust into her so hard and so fast… his body needed it.
“More…”, she whispered, writhing against him. She sank her teeth into his shoulder, and once again, his control snapped.
He pounded into her, barely aware when she cried out and her body gripped his convulsively. He was so close… so close…
The incredible pressure built at the base of his spine, mind-numbing pleasure cresting up towards the point of pain.
He was going to come… have to pull out… have to…
But oh god, he didn’t want to. He wanted to come deep inside of her, his most primitive instinct clamoring at him to give her his seed.
No… At the last possible second, he won the battle, pulling out and with a roar, letting his hot semen pulse onto her bare stomach.
It felt wrong. He felt empty.
He rolled to the side and rose to get a linen towel from the wash stand.
He carefully cleaned her off before lying down beside her and pulling her into his arms. Though she said nothing to him, only stroked his skin until she fell asleep with her cheek against his chest, he knew she felt as denied as he did.