33. Coraline
33
Coraline
The six of us listen to the first band play their opening song, which just so happens to be one of Pappy's favorites. Some of the music shows I went to in the city always started out slow and kind of awkward, but not here in Scottsdale. This band started out with a bluegrass bang and the crowd was really feeling the music.
I spot Mira and Henry Jacobs near the front of the crowd. They’re hand in hand dancing to the music. Henry is twirling Mira around like she weighs nothing. The crowd starts to watch them and cheer them on. They're both laughing and having the time of their life.
Jesse catches me staring at them and the next thing I know, his hand was in mine and he's pulling me toward them and the “dance floor”.
I didn’t have any time to protest before he was twirling me around to the fast pace of the song. The steady rhythm of the bass, the twang of the banjo and the frantic sound of the fiddle guides our bodies as we keep up the pace to the song.
When the chorus plays, we switch partners and I linked arms with Henry. We spin around in a circle and the sound of our laughter spills over the loud music. After a few beats, we switch back to our original partners.
Other couples from the crowd start to gather all around us to join in on the fun too. I forgot how good it feels to just let go and dance.My face is starting to hurt from smiling so hard.
The summer air is thick with the smell of our sweat and the scent of the earth as we continue our dance. The crowd is getting larger and they’re just as caught up in the melody of the song as we are.
As the last few chords of the song play out and the fiddle hits its last note, the crowd rides out their final wave of energy and erupts into a standing ovation. Jesse pulls me in for a hug as I attempt to catch my breath.My heart is pounding hard in my chest and I can feel sweat dripping down my back.
He presses a kiss to my cheek and I feel a tiny pang of guilt. It’s been a long time since I’ve ever done anything like this without my kids. I know it’s not wrong and that they’re more than likely having a great time riding rides with Granna, but I still feel guilty. I can’t explain it. Mom guilt is always something that I’ve experienced.
“This was fun and all guys but I’ve got to go find the boys," I say with a small smile. “I told them I would come find them after the first song. If you see Gemma, will you guys let her know where I went?”
“Absolutely,” Charlie replies.
I turn to walk away and I feel Jesse's fingers brush against mine as we navigate out of the crowd together. I guess he’s tagging along too. I look up at him and bravely take his hand in mine in front of everyone. The banjo starts up and the second song starts to play.
We continue to hold hands and make small talk while we look around for the kids and Granna. It feels like we’re teenagers again. We used to go to the county fair together every fall and walk around just like this and talk about anything and everything. That seems like it was a lifetime ago now.
“Jess, how’s your dad holding up?” As far as I know, Lloyd still hasn’t heard much of anything from Keri and she skipped town.
“He’s hanging in there," he shrugs. “All he can seem to talk about is the fishing trip we went on together. He really enjoyed spending time with us and the boys. It helped take his mind off of things at home.”
I always liked Lloyd and I hate to see him hurting. I still don’t understand how he got caught up with a woman like Keri. She has always hated my guts.
One of my biggest regrets in life is listening to her when she told me that I was holding Jesse back from living his life. We would still have been together when I found out I was pregnant with Harrison and our lives would be completely different.
We continue on our walk and I’m fairly certain the entire town of Scottsdale is in attendance this evening because it’s so crowded. I still have yet to find the kids or Granna in this crowd.
I’ll call her and check on them soon. I’m sure they’re just busy riding rides or playing games and we just overlooked them.
We walk right in front of the food trucks and the aroma of the funnel cakes and deep fried food makes my mouth water. My stomach growls loudly.
“Hey Cora, do you want anything from the food truck? I’m starting to get a little hungry and I figured the kids will want something to snack on as well.”
“Actually that sounds perfect. Can you get them some cotton candy and a lemonade for all of us?”
Jesse and I used to get a lemonade with as much sugar as possible and a funnel cake to share when we would go to the fair all those years ago.
“Sure thing.” He presses a soft kiss to my lips and then joins the food truck line. It feels so natural to be with Jesse again, like this is how it's supposed to be.
While he was getting us our food and drinks, I decided to sit at one of the empty picnic tables and take out my phone to call Granna. The sun is starting to go down now and I’m starting to get a little worried.
No answer. My stomach drops and I know in my gut that something is wrong. Jesse starts to walk toward me with all of our goodies, but my appetite has completely disappeared.
“Jess, I don't know why, but I know something is wrong. Granna will not answer her phone, it’s getting dark out and we still haven’t seen them. Call it mothers intuition, but I cannot shake this feeling,” I say while trying to catch my breath. I feel like I’m on the verge of a panic attack.
“Okay, slow down. I’m sure everything is fine. I’ll alert my team and have them keep an eye out for them," he says as he tries to reassure me.
Jesse pulls out his walkie and makes an announcement. “Attention staff, this is Jesse. Does anyone copy? Over.”
There was static and then a beep. “Charlie, loud and clear. Over.”
“Emergency Medical Response Team, loud and clear. Over.”
“Security, loud and clear. Over.”
Jesse brings the walkie back to his mouth again and presses the button. “We haven’t been able to find Cora’s grandmother or our sons. Has anyone seen them recently? Over.”
“Affirmative. I just recently saw them at the bathhouse. Over,” the security team replied.
We aren’t too far from there but I know that we walked by it at least two times and did not see them. I immediately turn towards the bathhouse and take off running.
My heart is beating so hard in my chest that it feels like it’s going to break free. Time feels like it has slowed down. The worst case scenarios run through my mind as I run through the crowd. Did someone take them? Are they hurt?
After what feels like years, I finally reach the bathhouse. Granna is sitting on a bench by herself looking down at her feet.
“Granna, where are the boys? I tried to call you but you didn’t answer.”
No response.
“Granna? Are you okay?” I snap my fingers in front of her face.
Still no response.
I put my hand to her forehead and note that she’s cool and clammy.
“Granna, can you hear me?” I note that she is also pale in color and her eyes are glassy.
Jesse runs up behind me and takes in the situation.
“Jess, I need you to walkie the emergency medical response team. I think Granna is having a low blood sugar episode. She's diabetic and I found her here alone. The boys are nowhere in sight.”
I feel like I'm physically dissociating from my body as he makes the announcement on his walkie. I try my best to hold my composure. Granna has been a diabetic for as long as I can remember but has never had an episode like this. Not that I can recall anyways.
As soon as I spot the medical team approaching and I know that Granna will be in safe hands, I turn around and frantically start to search for my kids again.
I feel like the entire world is spinning at a thousand miles per hour and I can’t focus. My only thoughts are about finding them. I know that I’m a trained medical professional, I recognize that I need to calm down and try to be rational, but I literally can’t.
I attempt to search the crowd for my little boys but all I see is a sea full of people. The lights and sounds of the rides that initially made me excited, now make me feel overstimulated. I feel like I’m trapped in my own personal horror movie.
My eyes continue to dart from ride to ride and from person to person. Every second that passes feels like an hour too long.
There’s no way that the boys would have left. They know better than to disappear.
My heart continues to sink as I realize that someone has to have taken them. I start to sob and at this point my fear is uncontrollable. I don't know what else to do.
I fall to my knees and start praying as hard and as fast as I can. I don’t care who sees me. I don’t care what anyone thinks.
I believe in a God that can do anything and I know he will bring my babies to me. I know that my God will hear me.