Chapter 27
27
Amy had been avoiding going back to see her parents since Nathan had taken such great delight in the awful headlines. She couldn’t face the thought of him tormenting her further. It didn’t matter that the press had been forced to apologise for any indication that Lijah might be involved in the grooming of underage girls, or the suggestion that he was using his father as a ‘pimp’ to line up casual flings with women who were of legal age to consent.
The police had arrested Stewart and had themselves issued a statement that there was no evidence whatsoever of Lijah’s involvement in anything that had happened, and that he hadn’t seen his father in twenty years. Nathan wouldn’t care about that, he’d find some way of using what had happened to continue to ridicule Amy. It had become a sport to him over the years, and even though she knew his behaviour was caused by a personality disorder, his refusal to get help made it far harder to excuse.
‘Where’s Nathan?’ It was the first thing Amy said to her mother when she arrived at their house, having already made the decision to turn around and leave if he was there.
‘He’s fishing with David. He won’t be back for hours.’ David was her brother’s only friend, although Nathan was lucky even to have held on to him, the way he treated him. ‘Oh, sweetheart you look exhausted.’
Amy’s mother hugged her, before ushering her through to the kitchen, where the table was already laden with lots of Amy’s favourite foods, almost as if a party was being thrown in her honour.
‘What are we celebrating?’ She tried to smile, but she couldn’t quite pull it off.
‘I just thought it would cheer you up. I made you some Mars Bar cakes.’ Her mother gestured towards a plate piled hight with slabs of chocolate crispy cakes. It was one of Kerry’s specialities, made from melting Mars Bars and butter, and mixing in Cocoa Pops, before letting it set and spreading more chocolate on the top. It had about a million calories a slice, probably, and Amy would normally have dived straight in, but not today. She seemed to have lost interest in everything.
‘Thank you. I might have some in a minute, but just a cup of tea would be lovely for now.’
Her mother gave her a level look. ‘Why are you doing this Amy? Denying yourself what you really want.’
‘I said I’ll have some later and—’ Amy could barely keep the note of exasperation out of her voice, but her mother cut her off mid-sentence.
‘I’m not talking about the Mars Bar cake. I’m talking about ending things with Lijah. Claire rang me last night and said he’s as miserable as you are. You’ve both looked so happy being back together and it’s done my soul good to see it. I don’t think I’ve seen you like that since he left. I know we’re all supposed to make ourselves happy these days and not rely on anyone else, but I don’t care how old fashioned it is, most people want to find someone to love, who loves them back. I know you want someone in your life, sweetheart, and no one is going to be able to match Lijah for you. Please don’t throw that away.’
Everybody seemed to be giving her the same advice and a huge part of Amy wanted to take it, but it was nowhere near as simple as everyone seemed to think. She wouldn’t just be having a relationship with Lijah, she’d be having one with every person who felt they had some stake in his life because of his fame.
Amy hated being the focus of attention, except on the odd occasion when she’d had a bit too much to drink and her inhibitions melted away, allowing her to get up and dance or belt out some karaoke. The rest of the time, she was much happier out of the limelight. If she continued seeing Lijah, the attention would be on her far more than she wanted, and she couldn’t imagine any of it being positive. She knew her mum wanted the best for her, and that everyone could see how she felt about Lijah, but none of them really understood. All she could do was try to explain things to the people who cared about her, in the hope they might eventually get it.
‘We come from such different worlds, Mum. It would never work, and I need to get out now before my feelings for him become even stronger.’ Just then the front door slammed, and seconds later Nathan came into the room, his face like thunder, making her heart sink.
‘David forgot the bait, so I told him he’s a dickhead and he stormed off. Stupid wanker.’
‘Nathan, there’s no need for language like that, go upstairs and calm down.’ Kerry’s tone was even, but Amy could see the muscle pulsing in her mother’s cheek.
‘Oh, why because she’s here?’ He jabbed a finger towards Amy. ‘You can’t just send me to my room, I’m not a bloody kid. I’m not disappearing just so she can sit here shovelling food down her throat. That’s not going to help, is it? Maybe if Amy ate a bit less, she’d be able to keep hold of a boyfriend.’
‘Get out!’ Suddenly Kerry was on her feet, her voice was shaking, and Amy could see in her eyes how furious she was.
‘What do you mean, get out?’ Nathan sneered in response, but their mother didn’t waver and it was as if something inside her had finally snapped.
‘Get out of this house and don’t come back until you’re ready to admit you’ve got a problem and that you need help for it. You can’t do this any more Nathan, and I can’t let you.’
‘You can’t just throw me out.’ Nathan’s tone was still cocky, but there was a flicker of something else in his eyes. Something that looked a lot like fear.
‘Yes I can. Now get out, and I mean now !’ Kerry walked towards her son, she was a good six inches shorter than him and far lighter, but suddenly she was a force to be reckoned with. For a moment it looked like Nathan might react, or refuse to leave, but then he turned on his heel, shouting a warning as he went.
‘You’ll all be sorry for doing this. I’ll make sure of it.’ The slamming of the door behind him seemed to shake the whole house, and for a few seconds Amy and her mother just looked at one another, before Kerry burst into tears.
* * *
Lijah had just one more goodbye to make before he left Port Kara. Being part of the befriending service had given him far more that he’d given in return. It had made him feel part of a community for the first time in a very long time, and meeting Albert had been the biggest part of that. He was a bit too old to be a father figure to Lijah, but he was the sort of father Lijah wished he’d had, although almost anyone would have been better than Stewart. But as much as Lijah detested the man, he couldn’t blame Stewart for the end of his relationship with Amy. If she hadn’t made the decision over that headline, she’d have made it over another, and he couldn’t blame her either. Lijah would love to walk away from the relentless intrusion, but he knew he’d be willing to go through that kind of hounding for the rest of his life if it meant he still had Amy.
‘Well, this is very good timing young man.’ Albert greeted him with a hearty slap on the back, when he met Lijah at the door. ‘You can help me pick out an outfit for a date with Cami this evening. I’m still getting used to calling her that instead of Millie, but whatever name she goes by, she’s still the girl for me.’
‘That’s brilliant, Albie.’ A genuine smile tugged at the corners of Lijah’s mouth for the first time in what felt like forever. ‘Where are you off to?’
‘Out for dinner. It’ll be our tenth date since we got back in touch.’ Albert stood back and waved Lijah in. ‘Come on through lad, there’s a nasty storm brewing out there.’
‘Ten dates, wow. You must have seen each other almost every day since the dance.’
‘Almost, but it’s still not enough for me.’ Albert was beaming when they reached the living room, and then he turned slightly, picking up the photograph of his wife that he’d shown Lijah before. ‘I must admit it makes me feel a bit guilty.’
‘You shouldn’t feel guilty. I’m sure Lizzie would have wanted you to be happy.’
‘Oh, she would, I’m just not sure how she’d feel about me being this happy. I haven’t felt like this since I was with Cami first time round.’ Albert sighed again. ‘Me and Lizzie were happy enough, but I always knew I wasn’t the love of her life, and I know for certain now that she wasn’t mine either. It’s always been Cami. There are plenty of people you can muddle through life with and get by okay, but everyone deserves to be the love of someone’s life. I’m glad Lizzie had that with Brian, but I’m even more grateful that I had it with Cami, and that now I’ve got to the chance to rediscover it. The thing that makes me feel guilty, is that I wouldn’t be experiencing this if Lizzie was still around. If she hadn’t died, I’d never have been in a position to meet Cami again. Over the years, I tried to convince myself that the strength of my feelings were the folly of youth and that they would have worn off eventually, even if we’d stayed together, but I know now that isn’t true.’
‘I’m sure Lizzie knew you loved her, even if it wasn’t quite the same and it sounds like you were lucky to have that companionship together.’ Lijah was saying what he thought Albert needed to hear, but what the older man had said had really got him thinking. No one wanted to spend their life feeling second best. ‘Does Cami know how you feel?’
‘I think so, I can’t seem to hide it.’ Albert smiled again. ‘And she’s been pretty up front too, telling me the reason she never married was because no one else measured up to what we had. That makes me feel guilty too. I left Cornwall, thinking I was doing it for her and that her life would be better if I disappeared. That way, she wouldn’t have to give up the estate and she’d be able to marry someone who could give her the lifestyle she was used to. Except I didn’t stop to ask her what she wanted. She says she’d have given all that up to be with me, and that she’d happily have traded it for the decades we missed out on. Still, you can’t turn back the clock, can you?’
‘No.’ Lijah’s mind was racing, as he looked at Albert again. ‘If the roles had been reversed, would you have given everything up to be with Cami?’
‘Like a shot. I built up my business and bought several houses in Yorkshire, I’ve still got some of them, as well as the farm, but none of that matters when you’re lonely. Before you came to visit, I’d go days without speaking to anyone sometimes and I used to talk to myself just to make sure my voice hadn’t disappeared altogether.’ Albert looked so sad for a moment, and Lijah had to swallow hard against the lump forming in his throat. Then the older man seemed to shake himself. ‘Still, that’s all behind me now and I just feel so lucky that me and Cami have been given this second chance, even at our age, and second chances should never be wasted. But I’m sure you didn’t come here to listen to me droning on about all of that.’
‘Actually, I came to say goodbye, Albie.’ Lijah didn’t miss the look of sadness that crossed his friend’s face, and he shook his head. ‘Except the truth is I don’t want to leave, and what you’ve said made me realise I need to tell Amy everything I want to say, before I even think about going. If I give you some advice on what to wear on your date with Cami, will you give me some advice on what to say, so I have the best chance of not blowing it?’
‘You’ve got yourself a deal.’ Albert winked. ‘I’ll put the kettle on first, though, lad. I think we’re going to need a strong brew, and if all those years in Yorkshire taught me anything, it’s how to make one of those.’
Lijah nodded, silently hoping that the years in Yorkshire had taught Albert far more than that, because he was going to need all the help he could get if he was going to persuade Amy not to waste the second chance they’d been given.