Chapter 12 #2
He held up a hand, his smile reassuring and easy, making her feel even worse. "I understand perfectly. I'm not fully over my ex." Taking her hands in his, he squeezed lightly. "You want us to be friends, and I have to respect that."
"Thank you," she whispered achingly and wished with all her heart that she could drum up some feelings for him. What the hell was it about her that she kept falling for the wrong man? Falling? No! The voice screamed inside her head.
She was mistaking really good sex, mind-altering, out-of-body sex for love, and that was incredibly stupid.
Of course she was not in love with the prince.
Where on earth had that come from? Forcing a smile amidst the chaotic thoughts tumbling around inside her head, she held his hands for another few seconds before letting go.
"I won't ask when I can see you again." He looked so hopeful that she wanted to lash out at fate for doing this to her again. It would have been so simple if she were involved with him.
"The fall charity benefit is coming up and it's going to get crazy," she said evasively, hating herself for what she was doing.
"But I'll let you know."
He flashed her a smile. "I really like you, Antoinette."
"And I really like you too."
"Just not enough for anything to happen between us."
I'm involved with the prince! And he's dominating my every thought. The voice screamed inside her head.
"Friends?"
"Always." He sounded so earnest and sincere that she wanted to weep. "Now you be careful on the roads. It's getting darker now and the streets can be treacherous."
"Thanks, Luther."
"Good night."
She didn't go straight back to the palace.
She had some thinking to do and did not want to face him, not just now when she was feeling vulnerable and confused.
So, she drove to the empty park and just sat there in the car, her mind in a whirl.
She had feelings for him, that much was obvious.
She had never been one to lie to herself and she could not just pick up the habit, just like that. She had very strong feelings for him.
The night and morning they had spent together had proven that. And as experienced as he was, she was pretty sure he had discovered that.
She had fooled herself into believing that she could play him. In the insane notion of getting her revenge on her ex-fiancé, she had gone too far.
She was not the type of woman to have casual sex. Had never been.
Now she was in trouble. And had no idea what to do about it.
*****
In the hour it took him to ride his horse, he had received some sort of clarity.
He was going to leave her alone. Who knows?
It might backfire on him, but he had to regain some sanity.
He was letting her hold all the cards and he was after all a man.
A prince to boot. He was in love with her, but he had no intention of surrendering his pride unless it was absolutely necessary. So, he had come up with a new plan.
He was going to make her miss him. He would not be taking her to bed anytime soon.
She was going to have to realize that he was serious.
He did not want half of her; he wanted everything.
And until she decided on that, he would leave her alone.
Oh, not entirely, because it would clearly defeat the purpose.
Every now and then he was going to remind her what she was missing.
He was standing by the window when she drove up.
His heart picked up speed as he watched her alight from the vehicle.
The wind blew her hair around her face, forcing her to brush it back, bringing memories of the way his fingers had toyed with the strands.
The memories were so potent, he had to force himself to stay where he was and stick to the plan.
He was not going to go running to her room. If she came to him, then fine. But he was staying put. Turning away, he went to bed, prepared to spend a long and empty night aching for her.
*****
She marched into her bedroom expecting to see him lying on the bed, stopping short when all she saw was a well-made-up bed with the cover turned down, the way Carmen did it.
He wasn't waiting for her. Telling herself that it was relief she felt, she walked slowly into the room and sat on the loveseat.
Carmen, bless her heart, had left a fire simmering in the hearth, sending a warm and cozy glow around the room.
Taking off her shoes, she wriggled her toes to rid them of the tension.
It was good that he had stayed away. This meant that he was listening to her.
But the empty, dull feeling inside her chest was not going away. He would still come. No! She shook her head, sending her hair flying.
This has to stop. It was ridiculous to think that anything good could come of it. They were poles apart and she would be stupid if she had not learned her lesson. She had been burned by an attractive man before; one she had planned on spending her whole life with.
And Prince Tomas Diego Luis Perez was so far out of her league, it was laughable.
The man was movie-star handsome and a multi-billionaire.
He was accustomed to beautiful women, the cream of society.
She would be setting herself up for a world of hurt and pain if she continued down this pathway.
He was not for her. And he would never be interested in someone like her.
It was just a phase. He was bored with all those rich society types and thought it was amusing to slum it. She had seen the countless photos, glossy photos of him and different women from all over the world. She had also read the various articles.
She was a simple, down-to-earth woman who valued her independence and her pride. She was slowly and surely getting over Brian. She stared in shock as she realized that over the last week, she had not thought of him once.
She was getting over him. Firming her lips, she rose and set about getting ready for bed, with the stark realization that she would not be getting much sleep.
****************
She struggled to open her eyes, blinking as the sun slanted on her face. The sound of the door opening had her squinting to see Carmen walking in with a tray.
"I came twice, but you were still fast asleep," the woman said by way of apology as she set the tray down on the bedside table. "You wanted to wake up at six. It's now half past seven."
"What?!" Antoinette jumped up. "You should have shaken me awake or something. Oh God! I slept through my alarm."
"You must have been tired."
Emotionally drained, spending half the night waiting for him to show up. Never again. She was done. Sweeping the covers off and grabbing the steaming cup of coffee the maid handed to her, she raced towards the bathroom. "The queen?" she called behind her. "Where is she?"
"She had to go out to an early appointment. She left some messages for you in the office."
"This has never happened to me before." Inhaling the coffee, she hurriedly took off her nightgown and tied her hair into a loose knot on top of her head.
She desperately wanted to ask about the prince, but kept her mouth shut.
She did not care if he was here or not. That was no longer her concern.
They had had their fun and now it was over.
She selected her outfit with utter care.
One look in the double mirrors in the bathroom had her deciding to use the makeup, and not sparingly.
And she wore a dress. The shell pink wool was close-fitting and had a matching jacket that reached to her waist. Skin-light stockings and tan leather boots completed the ensemble.
She added gold hoops to her lobes and a hammered gold necklace.
The lipstick was a pale, shimmering pink that mirrored the color of the dress.
She brushed her hair with long, hard strokes and pinned the thick strands at the nape of her neck. She was gratified when Carmen clapped her hands in admiration.
"Absolutely Bella," the woman murmured in admiration.
"Thank you." Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her jacket and purse and headed downstairs.
She did not run into him on the landing or in the hallway.
Shrugging, she went into the office and read the messages and went straight to work.
The phone lines had started ringing and before she had time to settle down, she was speaking to people from France and two others from Italy.
Looking up absently when a maid entered with a tray, she gestured to the edge of her desk.
A glance at her desktop showed that it was almost half past ten already and she had yet to take a break.
She sent off emails in response to the ones flooding in and answered a call from the queen to say that she would be out most of the day.
She had just settled back to enjoy a cup of coffee and Tostada when he strolled in.
Her traitorous heart, the same heart she had reprimanded all of last night, did a slow dive at the sight of him.
He had obviously been outdoors because the breeze had rustled his thick dark hair and he was wearing a suit.
The navy blue jacket fit his broad shoulders and was of a superb cut. He took her breath away.
"I have no time for you," she told him coolly. There was no way he was ever going to find out that she had spent last night longing to feel his arms around her.
"I brought you something." His smile was charming and did funny things to her stomach.
"You can keep-"
He produced a single Sterling rose from behind his back, simultaneously pulling her to her feet. "Hi," he whispered, his mouth covering hers hungrily.