Chapter 44
‘If it’s drinks rather than a meal, I wouldn’t go too dressy,’ Saffy said the following evening.
I’d given Milly an update yesterday and had rung Paulette in the evening. With my permission, she’d told Saffy I had a date which immediately led to an offer from Saffy to help me get ready. She had a great eye for style and she always looked effortlessly beautiful so I’d been happy to accept.
Saffy removed a pair of stylish jeans from my wardrobe. ‘Ooh! These still have the label on.’
‘I’ve never worn them,’ I admitted. ‘One of the Cake & Crafters had a pair on and I thought they looked fabulous on her so I ordered some but haven’t had the guts to wear them. I usually wear leggings and I thought those might be a bit trendy for me.’
Saffy grinned at me while shaking her head.
‘Tonight’s the night and don’t start on the age thing again.
You don’t look your age and, even if you did, sixty’s the new forty and something to be proud of.
’ She placed the jeans on my bed and turned to the railing, riffling through the tops. ‘We have a winner!’
I hadn’t worn the top either. I made most of my own clothes and favoured plain colours or dainty patterns but this particular one had caught my eye on a mannequin in a Keswick shop window and I’d impulse purchased it.
White with a giant turquoise flower, it had a chiffon overlay, floaty sleeves and a tied waist.
‘You don’t think it makes too much of a statement?’
Saffy led me to the mirror and held the top up against me. ‘It does make a statement and that’s I’m a beautiful, confident woman and you definitely want to see me again! Can’t you hear it?’
I had to laugh. Saffy was so good to be around and I felt recently as though I was seeing the real strong, confident, capable woman that she was rather than a scared young girl putting on a brave face.
She wanted to do my make-up and then my hair before I dressed. As she wound tresses of my hair around a styling wand she’d brought with her, I asked her how it was going with Felix and her eyes lit up.
‘He’s amazing. Perfection, no notes.’
‘Perfection, no notes? What does that mean?’
‘That I don’t have any notes to give him – you know, feedback on things to improve.
He’s a ten out of ten. Twelve out of ten!
He’s gorgeous, obvs, but he doesn’t know it.
He’s funny, witty, clever and such a nice person.
’ She released a spiral of hair and wound another tress around the wand.
‘I thought Kyle was the one but we got to uni and he turned into a bad boy which 100 per cent confirmed to me that bad boys are not my vibe.’
She continued to curl my hair while she told me more about Felix – how good he was with the staff and customers, how he never lorded it over anyone else that his parents owned the place, how passionate he was about cooking and how he loved being able to cook and bake simpler dishes for the café but get more adventurous for the evening bistro.
‘You seem so happy and settled here in Willowdale,’ I said.
‘I am. Waitressing isn’t my dream career but The White Willow’s such a great place to work so it’s ideal for me while I explore my art and maybe go down an interior design route.’
‘Perfection, no notes?’ I asked, making her laugh.
‘Perfection, but with just one note.’ Her smile slipped and her expression became wistful. ‘I wish I could be here with my parents’ blessing.’
‘How are things going with them?’ Paulette hadn’t said anything the last few times we’d worked together so I’d assumed there was no change.
‘Dad visited yesterday.’ The monotone words and lack of smile suggested it hadn’t been a roaring success.
‘But not your mum?’
‘No. She’s still hurting apparently. I can’t even…
’ She shook her head, sighing. ‘Grandma made me show Dad the footage of Kyle being drunk and some of the messages he’d sent me, proving he was the one who’d gone off the rails and that he’d lied about it.
Dad wanted to know why I hadn’t shared it all earlier so I told him I wanted my own parents to believe me without me having to produce evidence.
I also told him that I was really pissed off with them that they hadn’t.
I felt bad saying that but he needed to know.
I don’t understand why they’d automatically think the worst of me. ’
‘I’m sorry you weren’t believed before. Now that your dad knows the truth, I presume he’ll tell your mum.’
‘Yeah. He was pretty gutted about the whole thing. I thought he was gonna cry but he gave me this huge hug instead – nearly broke my ribs. He wanted me to send him the videos so he could show Mum but I told him that, if she doesn’t believe him without seeing them for herself, there’s no way forward for her and me.
Even if she does believe him, our relationship will never be the same again.
It can’t be. The way Mum’s treated me and Grandma is bang out of order and it’s not like either of us did anything wrong.
The damage is done and she needs to take responsibility for that. I know it sounds harsh, but…’
I nodded when she tailed off. ‘You’ve been treated unfairly and it’s bound to leave scars.’
Saffy picked up a wide-tooth comb and ran it through my hair, loosening the spirals.
‘I told Dad I want to come home to clear my room out and I don’t want Mum there.
He tried to talk me out of it saying it’s my home but Mum made me feel like it wasn’t and that can’t be undone.
I’ll never move back in, even if she does get her act together and apologises to me and Grandma for everything she’s done.
Willowdale’s my home now. I’ve got everything here that I’ve ever wanted so why would I leave it?
In fact, I change my verdict. Willowdale is also perfection, no notes.
I don’t need Mum’s validation to be happy here. ’
She put the comb down and fluffed up my hair before instructing me to close my eyes while she gave a mist of hairspray. ‘I’ll chat to Trevor while you’re getting dressed. Don’t mess up your hair.’
‘Yes, Mum!’
Saffy did make me laugh and I loved what a bundle of positive energy she was, but the situation with her parents made me so sad.
I totally understood why she hadn’t wanted to show them the evidence of Kyle’s lies but I was glad Paulette had made her show her dad because hopefully it would help move things forward.
Once I was dressed, I had to concede that Saffy was right about the outfit. It was bolder than anything I usually wore but it did look good.
‘You look amazing!’ Saffy said, beaming at me. ‘How do you feel?’
‘Surprisingly good, actually. I really wasn’t sure about it.’
‘Get rid of all your doubts. You sparkle tonight. So, who’s the lucky man? Grandma said he’s someone you knew years ago.’
‘He is. His name’s Will and he came into the shop, which was very unexpected. He bought one of the pictures you made from my old sheet music. It’s probably more of a catch-up than a date but here’s hoping.’
‘Remember what I said when you were doing your journal? You’re never too old for love. I’m sure you’ll have an awesome time.’
‘Thank you, and thanks for being my stylist. I really appreciate this.’
* * *
Much as I’d have loved a drink or two to settle my nerves, I’d decided to drive and forfeit alcohol as I wanted to keep a clear head for what could be a difficult conversation.
The Olde Oak was a pub in central Keswick with a bar at the front and a restaurant at the back.
It was a good choice because the bar area was a higgledy-piggledy mixture of small rooms and tables tucked behind pillars giving us privacy to talk.
My heart was beating so fast as I approached the pub that I had to pause outside for a moment to catch my breath.
Inside, I spotted Will waiting by the bar. He turned round and smiled at me, melting my heart. A smile was a great start.
‘Perfect timing,’ he said. ‘I’ve just ordered a pint but they’re changing the barrel. What would you like to drink?’
‘A soda water and lime, please.’
After paying, Will led me to a small round table with a wraparound seat by the furthest window.
‘Thank you for being patient with me,’ he said once we sat down. ‘I really appreciate it but, as you might have gathered, Fen gave me a kick up the backside.’
‘I thought so, but I didn’t ask her to.’
‘I know. She told me it was all her. She also told me she’d blabbed about some of what’s been going on. She’s prone to oversharing with people she likes.’
‘She likes me?’
‘Of course! Who wouldn’t?’
‘You’d have every reason not to.’
‘Believe me, that’s never going to happen. We both know that we had something special between us. That wasn’t me imagining things, was it?’
‘Definitely not. Everything you were feeling, I was feeling too. I couldn’t wait for you to come back and for us to spend the afternoon together.
Talking about a future with a man I’d only just met should probably have scared me but it didn’t.
It felt right. But then I picked up a voicemail from the hospital… ’
He’d already had the headlines when I chased him down the street, but I gave him the full details about how I’d panicked and sped to the hospital without even thinking about leaving a note or a message behind, terrified at the thought of losing Cliff.
I shared how devastated I’d been when I realised that Will would have turned up and found me gone but that it was too late at that point to do anything about it.
‘I’m so sorry,’ I said. ‘It broke my heart imagining you waiting in the lobby for me and what you must have been thinking when you realised I wasn’t coming.’
‘I was absolutely gutted. I waited for maybe ten minutes before I asked at reception and, when they said you’d already checked out, I waited a bit longer hoping you were moving your car or that one of us had got the time wrong.’
‘How long did you wait?’
He hesitated, perhaps debating whether to tell me the truth. ‘Three hours.’
‘No! Oh, Will!’