Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Charlotte slammed the phone down and slumped onto the nearest seat.
Sofia loomed large above her.
‘What the hell? What’s he doing here? How does he even know where you are?’
Charlotte just shook her head. It was too much to deal with, even without Sofia’s questions.
The shouting brought Maddie in from outside.
‘What’s happened? You’ve gone very white, sweetheart.’ She knelt down by the chair and held Charlotte’s hand.
‘Bloody Doug’s in reception.’ Sofia paced up and down. ‘I’ve got a good mind to go down there myself and give him a piece of my mind. How dare he invade her space like this? I’ll give him two-year affair!’
‘No!’
Charlotte’s wan face took on a determined look as she rose from the chair.
‘You will not go anywhere, please, Sof. I need to sort this out myself.’
Maddie stroked her friend’s back.
‘Too right. Sof, don’t leave this room. Be useful and get a glass of water, please.’
Sofia’s snort told them what she thought about being grounded.
Maddie lowered her voice.
‘Are you sure you’re up to this?’
‘Yes. It had to happen sometime; it might as well be now. Don’t worry, I won’t bring him up to my room. I’ll take him to that little café down by the port where it’s nice and quiet.’
Sofia’s anger was slightly muted by the time she returned with the water.
‘Sorry about my outburst, but the way Doug has treated you just makes me see red.’
Charlotte gulped down the glassful before speaking.
‘I know, Sof. But I’ve got to deal with this in my own way. He must have bullied the name of the hotel out of one of the boys. I gave them the details in case they needed me urgently.’
Maddie had a sudden pang at the thought that no one needed her anymore, urgently or otherwise, but quashed it quickly.
‘Are you ready to go down?’
Charlotte nodded.
‘OK, we trust you to follow your heart. And if you need us, just message and we’ll be straight on it.’
‘Yes, we can kick his ass with the best of them.’
‘Hopefully, that won’t be necessary, Sof.’
Maddie pulled Charlotte into her arms.
‘The best of luck, my love. Group hug.’
Charlotte held on tight to the two of them, before turning on her heel and heading for the lift.
The sorry sight that greeted her in reception was almost comic, if it weren’t also a little bit sad. Doug looked like a typical Englishman abroad in an old movie, red faced and dishevelled. He still had his straw hat on, and his chinos and polo shirt were crumpled beyond belief.
She had a moment to herself before he saw her. She tested out her feelings and realised that the predominant one was confusion.
His face when he did see her was like than of an expectant child who’d done something momentous, like learn to use the potty.
‘Darling!’
He was up, out of his seat and rushing towards her before she had time to respond. The other guests stared in fascination.
Charlotte submitted to a sweaty kiss on the cheek. It would look very strange to turn away. She wanted the least fuss possible until she could get him away to a quieter spot.
‘Hi.’ Charlotte opted for a cool smile. ‘Why are you here exactly? Is everything OK with the boys?’
‘The boys?’ Doug looked around as if they might magically appear. ‘Yes, they’re fine, why?’
‘I couldn’t understand why else you would get on a plane in such a hurry and come all this way to Greece if it wasn’t something to do with one of them.’
‘I’ve come to see you.’
The little boy lost look that had once worked wonders on her was fast losing its power.
Doug groped for her hand which she kept firmly by her side.
‘The thing is, I’ve realised I can’t live without you any longer.’
Had he only just realised? Here in the lobby? Analysing his words stopped her from feeling anything.
‘We need to talk.’
‘I agree. We really do need to talk. Let’s go to a little café I know where we won’t be overheard.’
‘OK, whatever you think best.’
Walking side by side and slotting into their usual rhythm was disconcerting. She was almost as tall as Doug, and she’d spent weeks with women with much shorter legs than hers, who kept begging her to slow down.
‘It’s really beautiful here, isn’t it, darling?’ Doug waved his arm around to encompass the little restaurants which stretched out all along the strip next to the water, and the boats beyond.
‘Maybe we’ll have to come back out here for a proper holiday sometime? Would you like that?’
Doug’s hopeful face tugged at her heartstrings just a little bit. But she ignored the question and led the way to the end of the promontory, where, she was relieved to see, nearly all the outside tables were unoccupied.
She made straight for the one right at the end.
It faced out to sea and to the islands far off in the distance.
Doug finally took off his hat and offered her the choice of seat.
He had always been hot on manners; she couldn’t fault him on that.
Not that it was good manners to shag the office manager.
Once seated, Doug gave her his best smile.
‘Lovely to have a bit of privacy, isn’t it?’
‘Mmmmm.’
The approaching waiter stopped any further conversation.
‘What would you like, darling?’
His use of the word was already grating on her.
‘A bottle of Mythos, please.’
‘You don’t normally drink beer…’ Doug’s face was a picture.
‘I don’t normally do a lot of things, but here we are.’
‘Two Mythos please.’
With their beers in hand, Doug went to speak again at the same time as her.
‘Charlotte…’
Only her friends called her Char. He’d always preferred her full name.
‘Doug.’
His eyes were on her.
‘No, please let me go first.’
Charlotte nodded.
‘Again, I want to tell you how sorry and ashamed I am of my behaviour. And you finding out the way you did was unforgivable…’
‘We both agree on that then.’
Doug’s startled face at her comment made her want to laugh.
‘But it’s you I love, Charlotte, not Natalie. You’re the mother of my sons, the woman I come home to every night, the woman I’ve cared for and who’s cared for me for over thirty years. Surely you don’t want to just throw our marriage away?’
‘I think it’s you who’s put in most of the groundwork on that one.’
Doug put up his hands.
‘Fair enough. I deserved that. Is there anything I can say that will persuade you that the affair with Natalie was a moment of madness?’
‘But that’s just it, isn’t it? It wasn’t a moment. It was a solid two years of lies and deceit. With a woman I thought was a friend.’
The anger built inside her as Doug carried on talking.
‘Natalie was a terrible mistake. She was going through such a hard time, Charlotte, and she was distraught at having to put her mother into a care home. She’s got no one else. She turned to me for help…’
‘Don’t you dare defend her!’
Doug’s body jolted against the table.
‘You were hardly giving her the type of help they recommend at The Samaritans, were you? Where does it say if a workmate is depressed then lay them back over the desk?’
Her shouting had attracted looks from the only other occupied table. But she didn’t care. Doug’s shocked face swam into focus.
‘Charlotte, sweetheart.’
‘Don’t sweetheart me. Anyway, it’s not Natalie I’m really angry at, it’s you.’
Doug attempted to stroke her arm, but she flung his hand away.
‘Again, I deserved that. But I’ve never seen you like this before.’
‘Maybe because, hopefully, you’ve never had an affair before?’
‘Of course not. This is the one and only time.’
A lock of his hair fell over his eyes in a way she used to find cute.
‘You do believe me, don’t you?’
‘Who knows what to believe?’
‘How can you say that? This is so not like you.’
‘What? Helpful, accommodating Charlotte, you mean, who’s there for everyone? Who volunteers for committees, is always dressed appropriately and pretends to other people that her art is some sort of hobby so you can look like the main breadwinner? I’m sick and tired of that Charlotte.’
The hurt in Doug’s eyes was almost too much to bear. They’d had more than thirty years of a marriage that had been happy in its own way before things went south. She didn’t need to stick the knife right in and twist it round.
‘Sorry, that breadwinner comment was nasty. But being away has helped me to understand that I’m not really that Charlotte anymore. It’s just taken me a while to realise it.’
‘I liked that Charlotte.’
Doug’s sad little voice stiffened her resolve.
‘Well, I’m sorry to tell you she no longer exists.’
Charlotte put her hand on his arm this time.
‘Can we be totally honest with each other for once?’
‘Sure.’
‘Have you really been happy these last few years? Because I don’t think I have.’
Doug took a long swig of his beer.
‘There’s been such a lot of pressure, with the business failing and everything. It’s hard to separate us out from that.’
‘I know you’ve had a tough time of it these past few years. But I genuinely believe that people in happy marriages don’t have affairs. Or at least not affairs that last two years.’
Doug’s head went down towards his chest.
‘I’m not having another go at you, honest. I’m just being realistic. I don’t know how I would have felt if it had been just a one-night stand. I’m not saying I’d be any more thrilled about the idea, but two years is a bloody long time.’
‘So, what are you saying? That me flying all this way to beg you not to break up our life together has been a waste of time?’
Charlotte put her hand over his.
‘It’s not been a waste of time. Because we needed to face this anyway, with or without Natalie’s interference.’
The more she talked, the more Charlotte solidified things in her own mind. The affair with Natalie was just a symptom of their problems, not the cause.
‘What do you mean?’
‘When the boys left, something changed inside me. My years as a caregiver were over, which is all normal and natural; you want them to go off and live their own lives, rather than being emotionally reliant on you.’
She was laying it out for herself as much as him.
‘So, at that point you realised I wasn’t needed anymore as well?’
‘This time, Doug, it’s not about you. It’s about me.’
He was looking at her as if she was speaking a foreign language.
‘We grew apart, but neither of us wanted to acknowledge it.’
‘But we’ve been married for so long. There are bound to be ups and downs. Surely we can try again?’
Charlotte had to harden herself against the pleading note in his voice. Doug downgrading a two-year affair to nothing more than a marital blip gave her the strength to carry on.
‘Ups and downs yes. But this is something more. I’m telling you I’m the one who’s changed, not you.’
‘I thought you loved me, for better or worse.’
‘Let’s not look too deeply into the marriage vows at this point, Doug. I’m pretty sure adultery is mentioned somewhere.’
She’d even got a little smile out of him. His sense of humour had always been a tick in the pro column.
‘As I was saying, I’m the one who’s changed. I don’t want the four-bedroom house in Surrey anymore, the Friday night takeaway and the pub quiz every Monday.’
‘But we were always on the winning side. You were our secret weapon. You know almost everything.’
He’d forced a smile out of her too.
‘Flattery won’t get you anywhere, either.’
‘So, what do you want?’ The fear on his face was palpable. ‘There’s no one else is there? Someone who’s made you feel differently?’
‘No, there bloody isn’t. Incredibly, a woman can have the urge to change her life without there being a man on the horizon.’
‘OK, keep your hair on. What exactly is your plan then?’
‘For once, I don’t have a plan, that’s the whole point. I want to explore new ideas, travel more. I met a woman today who was working as an artist in residence in the town here, who was inspiring.’
‘A woman? You’re not…’
‘No, Doug. I’m not rushing off to be a lesbian either. Typical of a man to think that. Would that make you feel better?’
Doug’s face made her think it definitely would.
‘Don’t answer that. I just want to experience new things.’
‘And we couldn’t do this together?’
Charlotte was torn for a moment, seeing the devastated look on his face, but there was no going back.
‘No, it’s something I have to do on my own.’
‘Are you saying it’s definitely over between us?’
Charlotte took a deep breath and looked into his eyes, the bright blue eyes she’d looked into every morning for as long as she could remember.
‘I am. With a heavy heart and a lot of sadness, I am.’
The tears that formed in his eyes and slipped down his cheeks were mirrored in her own. They held hands over the table and stared at each other until the tears dried.
Charlotte was the first to shatter the silence.
‘You probably don’t think it now, but you’ll end up thanking me in years to come.’
Doug’s laugh was brittle.
‘Can’t see that happening, but at least I know there’s no point hoping any longer.’
‘We’ll sort everything out between us when I get back. I’m going to take the last two days of my holiday as planned. I presume you have somewhere to stay tonight?’
Doug gave a short, miserable nod.
‘We’ll tell the boys together…’
‘Oh my God, the boys.’
‘I promise I won’t slag you off to them, and I’ll explain it’s a joint decision. You are a great dad.’
‘Just not such a great husband…’
‘Don’t play the pity card.’
The twinkle was back she was glad to see. It was faint, but there somewhere.
‘Fine.’
‘And we’ll look at selling the house and all that boring stuff.’
Doug put both his hands on the table, as if to steady himself.
‘We’ll always have our boys to tie us together. And I genuinely hope that we can stay friends.’
Charlotte had a sudden vision of Doug as a young man dashing through the rain to meet her at the station and twirling her round, drops of water flying everywhere.
Her voice caught in her throat a moment.
‘Look at me, Doug. Friends?’
He reached for her hand again and stared deep into her eyes.
‘Friends it is.’