Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
WRENLEY
Y awning, I made my way into the kitchen. I paused in the doorway when I saw Death already sitting at the counter with two mugs in front of him.
“Morning,” I said, walking over to take the steaming coffee in front of my spot as I hopped up on the stool next to him. “I guess you do know me a little since you’re here waiting for me.”
“Kid, even a blind man could read that you need to know everythin’. Besides, spoke to Torch and he confirmed he wants you to know.”
I thought he would check with Torch. Honestly, I was glad he did and pleased to know that Torch hadn’t changed his mind. I took a sip of the coffee and hummed. Death had gotten the right amount of sugar and cream for me. Then again, I’d already figured out that the men of the motorcycle club took a lot more notice of things than other men I’d known.
“You all right after yesterday?” he asked.
It’d taken me a while to get to sleep last night as my thoughts had run rampant. Some of the weight I’d been carrying, though—from keeping this to myself—had lifted now that the people in my life knew the truth.
However, even though I felt a lot lighter, anxiety swirled through my bloodstream over the unknown that lay ahead.
Despite that, whatever happened to Tony and his friends would be well deserved. Plus, however the Diamond Motorcycle Club handled it would be the right way, and I suspected Tony wouldn’t hurt a woman again.
All I needed to remember was that I wasn’t alone in this any longer.
I could lean on people.
“Honestly, I’m doing a lot better than I was.” Yesterday I’d been crying in my car and near drowning in worry. Now, I wasn’t. My head was far above the water, and my life seemed clearer.
“Good to hear, kid.” He took a sip of his coffee and then wrapped his hands around the mug as he placed it back on the counter. His jaw clenched.
“Death,” I said softly. When his attention came to me, I added, “If you’re not comfortable telling me, I can ask one of the others who know.”
He shook his head and returned to staring down at his drink. “It ain’t that, kid. It’s just, hell… what Torch went through was fuckin’ messed up. I worry about him. But—and I’m not sayin’ you’re this type of person—I can’t help being afraid that after hearing it all, it’ll change your thoughts about him in some way.” He scrubbed at something on the counter with his thumb.
I shrugged and told him honestly, “I’d like to believe that what I hear won’t change my mind. Yet, I won’t know unless you tell me. I want to understand him. To get to know him. So, if he wants me to learn about his past so I can do that, then I need to.”
He turned my way. “You got feelin’s for him?”
“I don’t know. I get butterflies when he’s around, and I feel nothing but comfort and safety when he’s close.”
He grunted and nodded. After another sip of his drink, he started talking. “Country, State, and me had the club for a while before we found Torch.”
I scrunched my brows together. “Found?”
He hummed with a nod. “Found him sittin’ in an alley of a bar we frequented. He looked rough, skinny and dirty, with blood, bruises, and cuts all over him. He flinched away from us to start with, wouldn’t talk. Just stared at the dirt as he sat on the ground, defeated. Eventually, when he realized we wouldn’t hurt him, he talked.” His jaw clenched again as his grip on the mug tightened. “He didn’t know his parents. Didn’t even know if they were dead or alive. All he had was a grandfather up until he was sixteen. But that man—” He snarled low and harshly, causing me to shiver. “—wasn’t a good one.”
My stomach churned.
“Our brother had put up with hell, livin’ with the damn devil himself for those sixteen years.”
“What happened?” I whispered when Death fell silent.
“Everything you could think of. He was starved, beaten, shared among his grandfather’s friends. Tortured in the worst ways.”
I covered my mouth, but a whimper escaped as my tears welled and fell for Torch. For the boy he was. For the days he’d endured the pain and suffering by his own relative.
Oh God, Torch.
Death went on, “When they weren’t using his body, they were trying different ways to torment him. Waterboarding, locking him in chains in a dark cupboard where he could hardly move. Electric shocks over and over?—”
Reaching out, I gripped Death’s wrist. “Tell me that… that thing is in jail. Tell me he’s suffering.”
“I wouldn’t usually go into detail like that, Wrenley. But it helps you understand why his mind is wired a little different. Most of the time no one sees the difference in him since he’s always been a quieter guy anyway. But when bad situations, like your own, arise, a switch gets flipped inside him, and he hungers for violence, for revenge, and for justice.” Death scrubbed a hand over his face. “That day when we found him, after he told us everything, he made us promise to never tell anyone or speak of it again. Until now. Until you. It’s huge for you to know, Wrenley. Means something big.” He shook his head and stared down at the counter. He wouldn’t have seen how much those words meant to me. How I swallowed thickly and pressed a hand to my chest in case my heart flew out of it with the way it fluttered wildly.
Death went on, “Anyway, that same day back then, we asked him where his grandfather was. We were ready to deal with that motherfucker.” His jaw clenched before he let out a long sigh. “We didn’t get a chance to. Torch had already burned him and the house to the ground.”
Closing my eyes, I nodded, pleased to know Torch’s monster wasn’t alive. Opening them, I asked, “Why did Torch trust you three to begin with?”
Death grinned. “He’d been followin’ us for a while, and we didn’t notice. He liked how, even when we weren’t blood, we were a strong family. One he felt he needed to be a part of.”
“And you took him in right then and there?”
“Sure did. Helped him come up with a story for the cops, and when the child protective services came and tried to take him away, he threw a fit. Thank fuck Boom was there. He’d already got custody of Gun, so they trusted him and Wendy to look after Torch. Though, Torch didn’t want to go with Boom to his house. He wanted to stay at the compound with us. So, he did. He’d shared his darkest times with us. He’d trusted us right outta the gate. We wanted to show him that same trust.”
Death’s words kept playing in my mind.
It’s huge for you to know, Wrenley. Means something big.
Why did Torch want me to know?
“Death, are you going to tell Raya this?”
“No. Torch said only for you to know. Unless Raya asks me, which I don’t think she will because she respects people’s privacy, I won’t tell anyone else. It ain’t mine to share, and I only do it now because he asked me to. I do this to protect him from relivin’ those goddamn sickening memories. Ones he’s locked away for a reason.”
“Why me then?” I asked softly.
He turned to me with a smile that tugged up only one corner of his mouth. “I reckon it’s because he wants to be your friend, but he wants you to know the baggage he holds in him. Why some things could set him off.”
“I feel safe with him,” I said again, looking away.
“Good. He’d never hurt you. Even when somethin’ sets him off, know you’ll always have his protection.”
“I do.” I believed that Torch would anguish over the thought of hurting me in any way. I could read it from his actions already. My tears tormented him. He suffered from my pain and hurt.
How could I not feel safe around someone who cared so deeply that he felt my pain?
I couldn’t.
Knowing that he worried about me so strongly made me want to smile. Instead, I bit my bottom lip to contain it, hating that happiness pushed at me after hearing about Torch’s tortured past.
Two sides warred.
“It’s okay to feel good knowin’ he cares about you, kid. His past is just that, a past. One he doesn’t want to relive. One he longs to forget and has already locked away.”
Raising my brows, I asked, “Are you sure you can’t read minds?”
His chuckle was low. “Kid, I wish I could. I’m just good at readin’ people. Besides, it was easy to see when you’re tryin’ not to smile.”
Rolling my eyes, I smirked, but it quickly faded. “He’s been through a lot, Death. Maybe Torch shouldn’t be around me while all this is happening. It might not be good for him.”
I wanted to protect him too.
“Sweet of you to want to help him, but being away from protectin’ you will do him more harm.”
Wings sprouted from my heart and fluttered.
“Okay,” I said quickly—too quickly since it seemed Death smirked. “If you’re sure.”
Please be sure.
He nodded.
I wanted to see more of Torch. I liked being in his company. Even if we didn’t talk, having him around was like a comforting caress.
Another question swept through my mind. “What did Torch mean when he said he’d done bad things?”
Death’s lips thinned before he ran a tattooed hand over his neatly trimmed beard.
“You know the club now, kid. You know we protect our own. Some brothers more than others like to deal out punishments to those who wronged us. Torch is one. I’m another. Your sister knows this. She’s accepted how the club is run. Now it’s up to you to work out if you can or not.”
I didn’t have to work anything out.
The men in the Diamond MC had already shielded Raya and me in more ways than anyone else had in our whole lives.
Today, if knights in shining armor were real, they would wear leather vests and ride motorcycles while protecting the people around them.
Their way might not be morally correct, but I’d still stand by them.
“I’ve already accepted you and the club.” I smiled softly and tapped my foot into his leg. “We’d never felt real safety until we moved into the house next to yours and you took us under your guard. Plus, I’ve never seen my sister as happy as she is when she’s around you.”
He reached out and bopped my nose like I was five. I swatted his hand away as he chuckled.
When he sobered, Death tipped his chin up at me. “Don’t give up on Torch and growin’ the friendship between you two.”
My face flamed as I coyly asked without looking at him, “What happens if I want more than a friendship down the track?”
He snorted. “So, you do have feelin’s for him?”
“I’m working it out.”
“Ain’t no rush. You’re on his radar, Wrenley. He’d be anythin’ you need. A protector from afar, a friend, and maybe even more. I’m not sure.”
“Thanks, Death.”
“Eases me, kid, knowin’ that you’re acceptin’ all sides after learnin’ everythin’ about him.”
I shrugged. “Really, there was never a choice. I was always going to.” From the first night I met Torch, I’d somehow connected to him in a way I didn’t understand but wanted to work out why.
He was worth knowing.
He was worth having in my life.
And I’d do anything to make sure he saw his worth eventually.
Death’s lips thinned.
“What?” I asked.
He sighed. “There’s one more thing you gotta know about Torch before you jump into growin’ whatever this will be between you two.”
A twist of unease threatened the coffee I’d drunk. “What is it?”
“Like most of the brothers, when we’re in protective mode, we go beyond any means necessary.”
“How?”
“Wrenley, my brother has been keepin’ an eye on you since Raya and Jupiter had their shit to deal with from that motherfucker.”
That’s months ago.
Scrunching my brows, I shook my head. “But… I haven’t seen him around, and why would he need to? I know you had the house watched around that time. Do you mean Torch was one of the men who guarded us here?”
Death pushed his mug away and faced me. “He was one who guarded through the night, and he heard you screaming from your nightmares. When the twenty-four-hour watch stopped, it didn’t for him. He’s been sittin’ outside your room at night, wantin’ to be there to protect you. Even from your dreams.”
Even from my dreams.
Oh my God.
It felt like tiny mice were tap dancing on my heart.
Even from my dreams.
He’d been sitting outside my bedroom trying to protect me.
My bottom lip trembled at the thoughtfulness, and I bit down on it.
Maybe I should be scared or put off knowing a man had been right outside my bedroom window, waiting, watching.
Yet, I wasn’t.
Did that make me more messed up than I thought?
Pressing a hand to my fluttering stomach, I gazed through wet eyes at the floor. Those dancing mice started to multiply, knowing Torch had wanted to be there for me even before knowing me.
He’d heard me cry and yell from my nightmares and had wanted to comfort me.
I wished I’d known.
But he hadn’t wanted me to.
I liked that there was no ulterior motive to his actions. It was only a blind need to protect. He wasn’t doing this to get in my good graces, to sleep with me, to use me, to pretend to care and then throw me away when he’d had enough.
He was a God’s honest saint, showing a selflessness I’d never witnessed before.
Want bubbled to life in my stomach. I wanted him in my life.
Maybe even wanted to keep him.
If I could, nothing else would matter beyond keeping someone who was so supportive and sweet and harsh—when he had to be—in my world forever.
“Kid?”
Glancing up, I gave Death a watery smile. “He cares.”
His gaze flared for a moment, and then he nodded. “He does. But I’m not sure he’ll like that I’ve told you about how he spends his nights. And hell, I’m goin’ against our code for even sayin’ it. But I know he needs a happiness that’s different than his family can give him, and I reckon you could give him that.”
Nodding, I tapped my foot into his leg again. “I won’t tell him you did. I’ll stumble upon him somehow. But I won’t let him stay out there again on another cold or rainy night.”
“Glad, Wrenley. Still, not sure he’ll want to come in or like you findin’ him.”
I smiled and shrugged. “He’ll get used to it.”
He would. If he was willing to go to the lengths he already had for me, then I would do nothing but the same back for him. Plus, I didn’t like knowing he’d been sitting out there on his own at night.
“Shit,” Death drew out as he studied me.
“What?”
“Know you will, but I still gotta say it. Take care, yeah? Don’t push too hard.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
I wouldn’t. I’d never want to upset Torch or have him do things he didn’t want to do. All I could do was try and hope he’d see that sitting outside every night wasn’t good for him.