Chapter 4
Every fiber of my body aches the farther I run from Niawen. And as painful as letting her go is, each step away from her keeps her safe.
She is quite far away, somewhere northwest of here.
Somehow I sense her.
I don’t know how when I am bonded with Caedryn, but perhaps some bonds are stronger than those held in place by the light. Perhaps it is the sheer love I hold for her that lets me sense her whereabouts, that lets me glimpse her in my dreams occasionally.
And that is purgatory, seeing her and not being with her.
Someday. Someday I will find you again.
I am as far south as my father’s palace, well into my father’s realm. Caedryn’s men retreated for the time being. They don’t dare come near the city.
I stare at the palace on the hill. Cynwrig is a beautiful capital city, with the great Dillion Sea shimmering behind it. The gleam of light off it on this early spring day is blinding.
My family is in the city. Father, Mother, and my elder brother, Kelyn. I pray Tiwlip took my cousin Brenin back to Hyledd with the springtime snowmelt. I cannot bear to see her, not when I broke her heart by falling for Niawen. The fewer people I care about in Cynwrig, the fewer who’ll be in danger should the assassins become bold once more.
Ah, anxious to see Father and Mother again?Caedryn asks. He hasn’t left me alone during my weeks of travel.
Stay away from them. They have nothing to do with our quarrel.
We shall see about that. I can infiltrate the palace whenever I desire.
What’s stopping you? What do you want from me? I squeeze the branch I am gripping, and it crumbles in my hand. As badly as I want to see my family, I won’t go back to Cynwrig. With Caedryn still howling through my thoughts, threatening to murder those I love, I cannot draw his assassins into the city after me.
I have yet to call out to Seren, Niawen’s dragon sister. Though Niawen has given me her dragon stone, I have not used the telepathic connection the stone forged between Seren and me. Before we parted, Niawen told me Seren would gladly take me to Gorlassar, the dragon realm.
There, the High Emrys can tell me if I am doomed to remain a monster—this fused embodiment of emrys and human—and if I can get rid of Caedryn in my head.
Then I can return to Niawen, without endangering her.
For days now, I feel Seren at the edge of my mind. She must know something happened to Niawen with the transfer of the dragon stone, but she hasn’t spoken to me yet. And pride keeps me from calling out to her.
But I need help. It’s time I stop being stubborn.
It’s more than time,a smooth voice says in my mind.
I shake my head in disbelief. Seren was waiting until I was ready. You are the most infuriating dragon!
It has been amusing watching you evade your pursuers.
Amusing? I’m so glad that my lack of sleep and my near-death experiences have kept you entertained.
It’s boring in the dragon realm, Seren says. No danger. No sense of urgency.
Right. But now you’re talking to me?
I was waiting for your pride to melt.
Seren . . . I grumble.
You were working through a lot of stuff. Who was I to interfere?
You have to be kidding me.
So you’re ready to come to Gorlassar? Seren asks.
Will I be able to get in?
No one can just walk into the immortal realm. The portal to the other world is high in the Eirwen Mountains, where no man can possibly hike. I have to take a dragon to get there. But the big question is, will they let a mortal in?
Maybe they will since I carry Niawen’s light.
I feel a sense of certainty coming from Seren. So you think they’ll allow passage?
I’m going to tear right through the barrier, she says. No one will stop me.
What if my condition prevents me from entering? Meaning, my mortality. The magical barrier at the entrance to Gorlassar stops those who are unworthy from entering. Mainly corrupted humans—those with scant amounts of light and those who carry darkness.
But with Niawen’s light, am I really still corrupted? Am I even still mortal? I carry a ton of purifying light. Surely I can pass through the portal.
While you don’t possess darkness and you have a vast amount of light, you are still human, Seren says.
I snort. In a manner of speaking. After the long weeks of killing souls with my enhanced abilities, I seriously doubt my humanity.
We haven’t brought humans through the rift before. I suppose that means we’ll have to stop and test it out.
You mean so I don’t crash into the barrier when you try to fly through it?
I don’t want to injure you, Seren says. That might feel like hitting a wall.
How soon can you pick me up? Might as well get this over with. I’ve put off seeing the High Emrys for too long. I am majorly intimidated about seeing the head immortal.
I’m already on my way. Open your eyes to my sight. You’ll see where I am.
You’ve entered Bryn already?
Hours ago. I’m nearly to you.
She anticipated my needs well before I asked. I’m truly grateful, Seren.
I know.
About Niawen—
Sorrow washes through me, an emotion coming from Seren. Don’t. I’m not ready to talk about her yet—
She’s safe, I say. I got her out.
After a long pause, Seren answers. Thanks for telling me.