Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
Charlie
We Become The Night
For now, I sit and watch as Kip makes his way through the crowd towards the bar.
He doesn’t look sad or dejected at all, as he chats away with the bartender. He smiles, laughing and joking like everything is just fucking dandy.
I guess he wasn’t as affected by me as I was him. Seems like he moved on from everything pretty easy. Did I misjudge him? I thought he liked me. He made me feel safe and special. But did he just use me, like Tyson used him? It sure seems like it, if his current demeanor is anything to go by.
I see him looking over at me occasionally, a confused look on his face. I don’t think he knows it’s me underneath this hood. I want to keep it that way for a bit longer. I want to watch him.
Grabbing a drink from the bar, he makes his way through the crowd of swaying bodies. Is he on the hunt? Looking for someone to feed from? A new victim?
He makes his way up the stairs towards the balcony. He’s coming this way.
I watch as his face changes while he looks my way. It’s not a look of recognition, but like he’s turning on the charm. A smile widens over his face, but from here I can tell it doesn’t reflect in his eyes.
I’m a conquest to him, nothing more.
Kip slides into the seat across from me. “Hey, handsome.”
He can’t even see my fucking face, how does he know I’m handsome? I don’t respond, wanting to see what he’ll do.
“Mysterious, I like that.” Kip winks. “You into vampires? I mean, of course you are. You’re at a vampire themed club.”
I huff. I thought hearing his voice and seeing him would make me feel better. It’s having the opposite effect. It’s obvious I actually meant nothing to him.
“Not much of a talker, huh? That’s okay. We don’t need to talk. You wanna dance? Or I could buy you a drink?” Kip keeps going, oblivious.
You know what? This isn’t worth it. I’ve been broken over this guy for days. Reaching out, trying to make sure he was okay. And he didn’t even have the decency to say anything back? He was apparently perfectly fine with ghosting me.
I push from my chair, sending it toppling backwards with a bang. I debate my next move for a moment. And then I decide. I want him to know that it’s me. That I came here, looking for him. That I actually cared, and that I’m a real person with feelings.
Whipping my hood back, I glare at him.
The smile slides off of Kip’s face, and his eyes widen. When our gazes collide, it feels like electricity zapping through my veins.
“C-Charlie?” Kip stutters.
My mouth shifts into a sneer. “Yep, sorry to disappoint. I know you were looking for a new person to use, and you thought you’d found one. But it’s just me.”
“Use? What do you mean?” Kip seems dumbfounded. Which I guess isn’t a far cry from how he normally is.
“You know exactly what I mean.” Snarling, the words fly out of me.
“You used me to feed off of so you could turn. And then you almost fucking killed me! Was it even really an accident? Was your plan to drain me, to get rid of me? But then at the last second your guilt and remorse kicked in and you stopped yourself? Well, you should’ve drank every fucking drop.
You should’ve just killed me. It would’ve been better than leaving me alive like this and then ghosting me.
I was fucking worried about you! Fuck me, right?
Stupid Charlie, letting his guard down and getting attached!
Well guess what, Kip? Fuck you. Fuck you so fucking hard.
” I’m panting now, my chest rising and falling in a harsh rhythm.
I begin to move past him, through with all of this. I said my piece, and I don’t want to hear a word he has to say back. When I pass by, his arm snakes out and snatches my wrist.
“Wait, Charlie, please.” Kip’s voice cracks.
I try to rip my wrist out of his grip, but it’s too tight and he’s too strong.
“Please, just listen. I didn’t use you. I would never do that. You have to know that. Especially after Tyson did that to me.” His sounds forlorn.
“I don’t know that, actually. It seems I don’t know anything.” I finally peel my wrist out of his grip, either that or he lets me go.
Before I get even a step away, I feel a strong body collide with mine. Air whooshes around me, and I’m left dazed and my back hits a wall. Kip’s body blocks me in, his palms resting beside my head. His scent surrounds me as his head dips down, his nose brushing along the side of my throat.
Kip growls, something ferocious. “You think I didn’t want to text you back?
You think these last few days have been easy for me?
That I didn’t lock myself away, trying to keep you safe from me?
” I feel his fangs brush against my skin.
“God. I’ve been dying without you. Fuck, I wanted to die after hurting you.
I can’t keep you safe from me. There’s always going to be a risk.
And I’m not willing to take that risk. I won’t hurt you again.
That’s why I ghosted you, for your own good. ”
I turn my head towards him, brushing my nose against his cheek. He sounds sincere…but is this all part of his game?
Feeling him close to me again, surrounded by his scent, is messing with my head. Can vampires do mind tricks like Jedi?
“I don’t believe you.” I whisper against Kip’s skin.
His chest rumbles against mine with frustration.
“I had to bury my phone in my sock drawer to stop myself from texting you back. But even with it hidden, I’d sneak over to my dresser like a criminal and dig it out.
I’d read the previews of your texts over and over.
But you didn’t text me today. I thought you’d given up on me.
Part of me hoped you did, for your own good.
But the selfish part of me wants you to keep fighting.
I don’t want to give you up. And you being here?
That proves you didn’t give up. So, please, don’t walk away and give up now.
Even if this means I’m stupid and selfish. ”
My heart thunders in my chest, it’s so loud I have no doubt Kip can hear its beat. I really want to believe Kip. Before this whole ghosting situation, I thought that he was kind and sweet. I didn’t believe he had it in him to hurt someone like he’s been hurting me. But is that all a lie?
“It’s not stupid and selfish if I’m willingly risking myself for you. It’s not one-sided. We both have a choice in this, and I want to choose you.” The words tumble out of my mouth.
Kip’s breath hitches before his hand suddenly grips my chin, forcing me to face him, and his lips crash to mine.
The entire world falls away as we ignite.
The kiss is bruising and needy. There’s nothing gentle about the way our mouths work against one another.
It’s forceful, our teeth clacking together with how unhinged it is.
I feel Kip’s fangs as they scrape against my lips and tongue. The taste of cooper lines my mouth, Kip’s fangs having made my tongue bleed. He sucks my tongue greedily, swiping up every drop of blood with fervor. Someone is moaning, and I’m not sure which one of us it is. Maybe it’s both of us.
The kiss finally breaks when I need to take a breath. We both pant against each other’s lips, our foreheads pressed together. Kip’s mist-like gray eyes connect with mine.
“What is this?” He asks against my mouth. “I don’t understand. I’ve never…this isn’t…”
“Me either. I don’t know what this is between us. I’ve never needed someone like I need you.” I admit, wrapping my arms around his neck to curl the hair at the nape of his neck around my fingers. “It hasn’t even been a week. This is madness.”
“It doesn’t make sense.” He presses gentle kisses on the corners of my mouth, and then trails his lips along my jaw. “I wanted to die without you. Dying is preferable to hurting you again.”
I was angry before, I know that. I was hurt, and felt betrayed and used.
But my mind was playing tricks on me. It always whispers horrible things in my ear, telling me I’m not good enough, or no one will ever love me, or no one actually likes me.
And I believed it. But now I see that my brain was the liar, not Kip.
Kip is soft and caring. That’s why he ghosted me.
He thought he was doing what was best for me.
“I’m willing to take the risk, if you are.” I whisper. “You made me bleed just now, but you didn’t go into blood lust. You can control yourself. What happened Sunday night was an accident. And it won’t happen again.”
“I’ll make sure of it. I won’t hurt you again.”
“I’m not only talking about physically. When you ignored me, it hurt me emotionally. I won’t put up with being treated like that again.”
Kip’s eyes fall closed. His voice is pained. “I know. You deserve better than that, Charlie. I’m sorry.”
“I’d say it’s okay, but…it really wasn’t cool.”
Kip’s voice turns raspy as he presses into me. “Let me make it up to you.”
He grinds into me, and I feel his length hardening against my stomach. My body responds in kind, heating up at the touch.
Before all common sense goes out the window, I manage to gasp “Wait, wait, wait. Didn’t you come here to feed? Maybe you should do that first before we get carried away…you know, just in case.”
Kip stills against me. “You’re right. We need to be cautious. It’ll be my first time doing anything sexual since turning. Who knows what might happen. I should feed first.”
“Well, I am right here, and I’m willing. You can feed from me, Kip.”
“Y-you’d…you’d let me? I mean, after what happened on Sunday?” Kip’s tone is wary and nervous.
“This might make me a fucking idiot but…yeah, I’d let you. I trust you.”
Kip groans, his forehead resting against my shoulder and his blond waves tickling my nose. “Thank you. Ugh, the thought of having to feed off someone else had grossed me out.” He shudders dramatically. “I only want you. I held off from feeding as long as I could, but I’m so hungry.”
“Bite me, then. I want you to.” My voice is hoarse as a practically beg him for it. “I want to feel that connection with you.”
Kip meets my eyes. “You’re sure?”
I nod, giving him a small smile.
“Thank you.” He purrs against my throat.
Kip’s breath over my skin sends a shiver through me. I brace myself, waiting for the initial shock of pain, followed by the swirl of pleasure.
Kip presses an impossibly soft and sweet kiss against my pulse point before I feel his mouth open, and his fangs take their place against my throat.
I gasp as his fangs sink into my skin. My eyes water at the sudden, piercing pain.
But as he sucks and tongues the dual puncture wounds, the pain recedes and is replaced by a pleasant buzzing underneath my skin.
My body feels like it’s humming. It’s euphoric, and similar to how I feel when I’m high.
I sigh against him, my body going lax in his hold as he takes pulls of my blood. I feel my lips tipping up in a smile.
Kip groans against my neck. Before I can protest, because I desperately want him to keep going, even if it kills me (woah, that’s a dangerous thought…), he’s licking up the remaining drops of blood before pulling away.
I whine at the loss of intimacy and contact.
Bringing his arm to his mouth, he rips open my skin and offers me his blood to heal.
I freeze. It occurs to me that if I take his blood, and I happen to die with it in my system…
I’ll become a vampire. Is that something I want?
An eternity, watching everyone I know die while I never age?
I could end up like Kip. Is that a bad thing?
Forever might get lonely…but if I had someone at my side, it might not be that bad.
The giddy side of me, the one that wants to keep this connection with Kip, butts in.
I mean, what are the chances I’ll die in the next twenty-four hours?
It’s not like I’m going to be climbing trees, or doing anything super dangerous.
And if death is what’s in store for me in the next day, am I ready to go?
Would I rather take my chances becoming a vampire?
I think I would.
He presses his bleeding arm up to my mouth, allowing me to lap at the wound. His blood is the sweetest nectar. I’ve never tasted anything like it. I wonder if he feels the same way about mine.
I feel the wounds on my neck close up. Once the last trace of them disappears, he pulls his wrist away from my mouth and replaces it with his own lips. The kiss tastes metallic, a combination of our individual blood essences that still linger in our mouths and on our lips.
A giggle escapes me when he pulls away, and I know I must look silly with this wide, goofy, grin spread across my face. “How does it feel good when you do that? And why does it taste like that?”
“I spent some time on some forums over the last few days. I read that vampire saliva can do that. Make it feel good, instead of painful. That’s why I was licking the wounds. Not because I’m a freak, or anything.”
Ahhh, so vampires can blush!
“I mean, I’m a freak and proud of it. I did let a vamp feed off of me, and made out with him afterwards. That’s not exactly normal behavior.” I tease.
“Who?!” Kip pretends to be appalled, like he isn’t the vampire I just tangled tongues with. “Who dared make out with my human! I’ll kill him.”
“You're human, huh?”
Kip shoots me a sly grin. “Yeah. My human. You’re stuck with me now, Charlie.”