Chapter 2
Not the Same
Bentley
“Are you sure you want to do this, man? This is Zah. All I want is to see her happy, bro. I don’t know what all happened between you two, but she’s family.
“Haven’t we all been through enough? Gilbert can give her a nice life and stability. Why come back and get in the way of that now?” Eddy says as he pulls up to the reception hall and parks.
“I love you, Eddy, but shut the fuck up and mind your business. You’re right about one thing. You don’t know what happened and you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” I grumble.
“Bro, what I do know is this is crazy. It’s her wedding rehearsal dinner.”
“What’s your point, Eddy?”
“It’s always about you, Bentley. All my life, it’s been about you. I’m asking you to stop and think about her.
“Think about how this affects everyone else around you. I don’t want to lose her too. Zah is important to me. I don’t want to see her hurt.”
As the youngest, he thinks everything has always been about me. My family did a lot to support my dream. Heck, our entire community has.
I feel for him, but he’s wrong. It’s never been all about me. This dream was my father’s first. He ingrained it in me, and I did all I could to see it through. Then life called an audible.
“I’m not here to hurt her. I’ve done enough of that,” I bellow. “I’m fucking tired, bro. I’m tired of fucking up. I’m tired of saying the wrong thing. I’m tired of being without her.
“Yes, I’m going to do this because nothing makes sense without Zahirah in my life. Nothing.”
I shake my head with my last words. I didn’t come all this way to turn back now. Call me selfish, but I need to do this.
I have to hear from her lips that she doesn’t want me. If she looks me in my eyes today and tells me I’m too late, then I’ll walk away. Then and then only.
“Well, there she is. If you’re really going to do this. Here’s your chance. Don’t fuck this up, bro. Don’t cost us all her light.”
I tighten my jaw and close my eyes. I’m not here to take her away from my family. I know how much she means to everyone.
When I open my eyes, I glance out the window and the sight before me takes my breath away. Zariah looks like a fucking knockout. Her hair is flowing down her back in loose brown waves.
The black dress that’s hugging her body is sexy but classy. Her dark-brown legs look amazing. That body still screams track star.
I clear my throat and reach for the door handle to open the door and step out. Three things happen at the same time. I step from the vehicle and run a hand through the front of my hair. Gilbert Manning walks up to Zahirah and places a hand on her back.
Zahirah looks in my direction and freezes with her mouth open. I can’t help but smile at her. A smile brightens her face for a brief second before it falters and she frowns.
I inhale deeply and force my feet forward. This is it, it’s now or never. Strolling across the lot, I close the gap between us.
“Bentley?” she breathes as I stop before her.
“Hey, Zah.”
I can’t take my eyes off her face. Zah has the clearest skin I’ve ever seen. Her dark-brown complexion has this glow about it. It looks like the purest dark chocolate kissed by hues of bronze and gold.
“What are you doing here?” she asks, looking up into my eyes, searching.
“You’re getting married. My family was invited.”
“Coswell, I wasn’t expecting you. This event is by invitation and RSVP only. I don’t know that there’s a place for you tonight,” Gilbert says with a smug grin on his face.
“Oh, that’s not a problem. My mother RSVP’d. I’m her plus-one,” I reply, returning his smile with a shit-eating one of my own.
“Oh. My. God. I should have known our mothers were up to something. Gilbert, I’m so sorry about this.”
“What is there to be sorry about? We grew up together. Gilbert and I were once friends. I don’t see the problem.”
Zahirah sighs and rubs her temples. “Bentley, can you and I do this some other time?”
“No, not if it means you’ll be married to someone else.”
She looks at me with wide eyes. “Are you serious?”
I give her a pointed look. Gilbert moves her behind him and steps forward to get into my face. I roll my shoulders back.
The nerve of this asshole. I’ve always known he’s wanted Zahirah. He’s not who she thinks he is.
“Maybe you should go. She doesn’t want you here and after tomorrow, I don’t want you around my wife.”
“Gilbert,” Zah gasps. “Can I talk to you?”
I release a grin. Gilbert growls in my face but takes a step back and Zah tugs at his arm.
Pussy.
“I’ll be waiting right here for my turn,” I say as they begin to walk away.
Gilbert stops and turns toward me with his fists balled. I don’t even flinch. I will lay his ass out if he jumps at me. Gilbert ought to know better.
While we were once friends, I’ve kicked his ass more than once. I’d be happy to do it again.
I can’t believe he went after my girl behind my back. I’m not surprised. He has always been a pretentious asshole.
I can’t begin to fathom why Zah has gotten involved with him. He’s not her type. The jerk has to be putting on airs to get her to fall for his shit.
Gilbert opens his mouth to spew some crap when a loud cry fills the air. We all turn to see what’s going on. I sprint into action as soon as I see what’s taking place.
My heart is in my throat. This can’t be happening. I stop breathing until I make my way over to my mother, sisters, brothers, and ...
“Mom?” Zah cries as she drops to her knees.
Zahirah
“Mom? Mom,” I cry as my mother lies on the ground.
My ears are ringing, and my heart is racing. What is going on? I can’t lose my mom.
“She said she wasn’t feeling well in the car and passed out as we were making our way inside,” Mrs. Coswell says as she wrings her hands.
My mom and Mrs. Fran have become as close as Erica and I are. They have seen each other through a lot. The two are inseparable.
“Someone call for an ambulance, please,” I sob.
“I already did. They’re on the way,” Bentley says from beside me.
He has taken his jacket off to place beneath my mother’s head. I shouldn’t be so grateful to have him here. However, I am.
He wraps an arm around my shoulders and tugs me into him. It feels like coming home. He smells so good, and his arm banding around me feels so strong and warm.
Memories try to flood my mind, but I push them back. I don’t have time for that right now. I need to focus on my mom.
“It’s going to be fine. I’m here,” he whispers in my ear.
A shiver runs through me. I shouldn’t want to cling to his words so easily. However, I’m on the verge of falling apart.
This is the last straw. All the pressure feels like it’s going to cave my lungs. In this moment, Bentley is like a lifeline I didn’t know I needed so much.
“Zah, baby, Dr. Richards hasn’t arrived yet, but he should be pulling in soon. He’ll be able to look after your mom,” Gilbert says.
Dr. Richards is a friend of Gilbert’s. I’m sure he does his job well, but I’m not waiting around for him or taking any chances. I’m taking my mom to the hospital to be checked out.
“I’m taking her to the hospital,” I say firmly.
“What about our guests?”
“Fu—”
“I will go inside and let everyone know what’s going on,” Erica says, cutting me off before I lose my shit.
“You can let them know tomorrow isn’t happening while you’re at it.”
“What? Zahirah, I’m sure your mom will be fine by tomorrow night. Let’s not be so hasty.”
I shove out of Bentley’s arms and stand. Grabbing Gilbert by the arm, I tug him out of earshot. He looks back at me nervously.
“That is my mom lying there. Take this as the sign it is. We need to call this off. Tell everyone my mom has fallen ill. She’s supposed to walk me down the aisle.
“I think everyone will understand if we postpone for now. In a few weeks, we’ll part amicably. Too much stress and needing to slow down or something. We’ll figure all that out,” I bite out.
“Is this because of him?”
“What? What are you talking about? What aren’t you getting? My mother just collapsed.”
I drop my voice. “This isn’t real. We should have called it off weeks ago. It has nothing to do with him.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure I’m about to lose it on you. What’s the matter with you?”
I turn to go back to my mom as the ambulance pulls up. Gilbert grabs my arm to halt me. I turn to look at him with my brows knit.
“He’s only going to hurt you again. Don’t do this,” he pleads.
I shake my head to clear it. I’ve been missing something here, but I don’t have the time to process what. I need to get to my mom.
“Whatever, Gilbert. I’ll talk to you later. I have to go,” I say and pull my arm from his hold.
He bites out a curse but allows me to walk away. My mind is moving in a million directions. I’m not able to process any of it as I follow my mom into the ambulance.
I sit with my head in my hands, sobbing as we ride to the hospital. Once we arrive, Mom is rushed to a room and examined while I pace and wait.
It doesn’t take long before I’m led back to her room. Denzel, Bentley’s sister Lauren’s fiancé, is the attending doctor. I’m so glad to see him. He gives my shoulder a squeeze as I enter the room.
“She’s going to be fine,” he says before he walks out.
I take a seat by her bed and drop my head into my hands like on the ride here. I’m so confused and lost right now. My mother is a healthy woman, this is so out of the blue.
A hand on my shoulder causes me to lift my head. My mother is smiling at me with her soft-brown eyes.
“Now that I have your attention and that boy isn’t around to cut my questions off, I’d like you to explain to me what’s going on. Why are you hell-bent on marrying someone you don’t love?”
I scoff. “Aw, hell nah. Mom, did you just fake all this?”
“I’m a mother, I did what I needed to do to protect my baby. Now start talking, Zah. I know you’ve been hiding things since you came back home.
“I think Gilbert has been playing on your secrets and has been trying to trap you into a marriage he doesn’t intend to end.”
“Wait, you know?”
“That this entire wedding is bullpoopy? Girl, you think I’m one big fool, don’t you? You’re lucky I haven’t bopped you upside your head. You’re dragging a lot of good people into this mess, and most of all, you have Aaron smack in the middle.”
She shakes her head and purses her lips. Guilt begins to rise in my chest. I’m not even sure how I got here anymore.
“I can see you’re lost, baby. It’s written all over your face. Maybe if you talk it out with me, you will hear your answers for yourself,” my mother coaxes.
I look back at her as she searches my face. I try to think of where to start. I’ve wanted to tell her so much over the years, but the secrets started a long time ago.
“Start from the beginning, child. I’m here to listen.”
I take a deep breath and blow it back out. I open my mouth and the words begin to spill. It’s like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders.
I go all the way back to the beginning. I was so young and naive back then. If I could do it all over, I would. There’s so much I would take back and change.
“It all started with my first day of college.”