Chapter 2
You drew memories in my mind I could never erase. You painted colors in my heart I could never replace. - perry poetry
L acey
He’s not the Asher I remember. That’s all I can think of as I attempt to climb on his motorcycle behind him. I do as he says and slide forward as much as possible and then wrap my arms around his middle, squeezing tightly. I’m terrified, having never rode a motorcycle before, but I don’t tell him as much. Frankly, I’m still in complete shock over how today has turned out in the first place.
There were the psycho guys at my apartment earlier who I thought were going to beat down my door. I was on the phone calling the cops as soon as I got a look at them out the window that’s located directly next to my apartment door. There was no way for me to escape. I live on the fifth floor because my father swore it’d be safer than a lower floor. His reasoning didn’t seem to make much sense at the time when I would’ve been trapped if those guys got inside.
The moment they said Seth’s name, however, I hung up the phone. I knew my brother was in deep with something bad. He didn’t tell me anything, of course; it was my mother mentioning how she didn’t think they’d be returning to the States that tipped me off the other day. In her defense, she asked me to come visit them, but obviously, it was a little too late if these thugs were already beating down my door.
I’d watched as the men got into their vehicles in the parking lot and eventually drove away. I was having a panic attack the entire time, telling myself not to pee my pants because I was too scared to leave the window and miss whatever they did next. The moment I was confident they were gone, I hopped in the elevator and then dove into my car, speeding away like my life depended on it. I’m pretty sure my life depending on it is reality and not just me blowing this out of proportion. I knew if anyone could help me, it’d be Asher.
Seth had mentioned a while back, when I asked why his best friend wasn’t around anymore, how he’d gone off and joined a motorcycle club. When my brother went to college, I guess I always assumed Asher went to a different school, but now when I look back on it, I never saw him around on college breaks or after Seth had graduated. I was too absorbed in my own life at that point and had already made myself believe my crush on Asher was one-sided and always would be, as he’s older than me and has treated me like his adopted kid sister. It never stopped me daydreaming of him, though.
So, imagine my surprise when I was able to hunt him down and see him for the first time in what now feels like forever, and he admits he wants to fuck me. Talk about making my head spin, and in any other situation, I’d be all over his offer in a heartbeat, but everything with Seth has my thoughts and emotions in a tailspin. Toss in Asher on his knees, mouth on my pussy in a motorcycle club’s parking lot, and I have no idea what to think or feel at the moment. He knew exactly what to do to make me squirm and moan, and it has an ugly pit of jealousy forming in my stomach as I contemplate exactly how he learned to be so good with his tongue. It’s pierced too, has been for as long as I can remember, so it definitely doesn’t help his case now that I know exactly what it’s used for.
He pulls out onto the access road leading to the highway and I cling to him for dear life. Burrowing my face into his back so I don’t have to look at my surroundings going this fast, I inhale, and his warmness washes over me.
He still smells like the old Asher. His detergent must be the same and his cologne hasn’t changed.
God, the times I’d picked up his clothes and took a great big sniff are embarrassing, but my crush was relentless. The first time, I was ten years old and was cold, so he put his hoodie over me. It was so much bigger than me at the time. I was swimming in the material, and all I could smell was his cologne. It became my favorite scent from that moment on. I always wondered if he eventually caught on, because I always forgot my jacket (on purpose), so he’d let me wear his.
However, it wasn’t just his cologne I wanted to sniff; it was the simple fact I always felt safe whenever I was surrounded by him. It’s no wonder he’s the first person I ran to the moment life got scary and with Father gone, he’d easily be the one I’d feel protected with. As soon as he parks and shuts off the engine, I ask, “How do you know where Seth lives?”
“Stop yelling, the bike’s not on,” he chides with an amused smirk, helping me climb off. He admits, “I’ve always known where he lives. Same for you.” He mentions the last part like it’s no big deal, but it’s big and bold in my mind.
“What do you mean, same for me? You know where my apartment is?” It’s not far from here, but this place is a little too ritzy, even for me. My brother got this fancy condo because he was making a lot more money on top of his trust fund from our parents when he graduated.
“Yep. I may be with the club, but it doesn’t mean I forgot about everything else in my life.”
Could’ve fooled me. Considering I haven’t seen him in years and I doubt I would’ve anytime soon if I hadn’t shown up out of the blue, basically on his doorstep. I keep that thought to myself, though, because the last thing I want to do is piss him off and not have him help me from it. Though it’s hard for me to even consider him not being there for me since he had always been around from when I was younger.
I’ve missed him over the years, but I don’t think I realized how much, until I saw his face when he came strolling out of his ‘ clubhouse. ’ Geezus, the man is hotter than sin, his gait was like he owned the entire place and he had all the time in the world to get to wherever he was headed. I’d have had to be blind and dumb not to have stared him down the entire time then, as well as continue to flick lingering glances at him randomly to reconfirm that, yes, he is, in fact, a stupid amount of sexy.
“Can’t believe this place doesn’t have closed parking, what the fuck were they thinking?” he complains, glancing around at the various luxury vehicles and sports cars filling the parking area.
“Why would they need to worry? They have insurance and security.”
His brow hikes, “Suppose you’re right, Jailbait . You see any vehicles that look like the guys who came to your place?”
“Jailbait?” I scoff. “Hardly, I’m way past being a minor.”
He smirks and I know he’s giving me a hard time. “You weren’t the first time you made my cock hard.”
Rolling my eyes, I admit, “Yeah, well, you weren’t the only one having fantasies at seventeen.” His mouth drops at my brazen response, and I find myself standing a little taller. “But, to answer your question, no. They were in a Hammer .”
“No shit? Haven’t seen one of those in a while. I thought they stopped making the Hammers.”
I shake my head, embellishing, “It was the new electric model, in their custom olive drab special edition paint color option.”
He whistles, nudging me. “You’ve got it down to the color and model, hm?”
“You may not have forgotten about me and Seth, but clearly you didn’t pay attention to our lives.”
He frowns, but I’m only being truthful about it. “Stay close. I don’t want anyone kidnapping your fine ass. I’m not done with you yet.”
I do as he says, not in the least bit resistant to allowing him to protect me. I’m not an idiot, I know I can’t fight some psycho big guy or guys off if they want to grab me.
After a few minutes, he breaks, not being able to hold back from digging into my remark. “You gonna tell me what your comment was implying back there?”
“About our lives? About school?”
He nods, constantly flicking his stare in one direction, then the next. He’s on edge and I’m grateful for it, makes me able to think a bit clearer without the added stress. Him moving like a ninja with stealth and experience makes me appreciate his affiliation with his motorcycle club a little more. He shares, “Seth said you were gonna be in some sorority or some shit like that.”
“Mom wanted me to pledge, but it wasn’t for me. I studied mechanical engineering and automotive design.”
He comes to a halt, grabs my arm, and shoves me up against the closest brick wall. His big, warm body presses to mine, shadowing me in his bulk as he gets in my face. “You studied cars ?” His tone echoes his disbelief, but it’s okay, I’m used to that reaction when I tell people what career path I chose.
With a small dip of my chin, I whisper, “I literally design cars for a living. I draw them all the way down to the smallest concept.” I don’t know whether I like him being interested or if I’m hurt over the fact he apparently has no idea what I dedicated my career to.
His hand tangles in the back of my hair, tilting my head back as he leans in. His sweltering gaze pins on mine as his lips nearly touch mine. “That’s the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever heard a woman do.” He nips at my bottom lip, stealing my next breath as my lungs cease up at his intimate touch. My thighs clench in desire as I finally remember how to breathe again, and he releases me as fast as he grabbed me. He strolls off, then doubles back, snatching my hand, and tugs me along when I don’t move. “Come on, baby .”
Why does that one little word coming from his mouth drive me so crazy inside over him? I’m reading far too much into it and it’s making me crazy inside, over him, for him, just in general at this rate.
We ride the elevator up to the eleventh floor where Seth’s condo is located, every second ticking by making me more and more aware of his presence and how I’d enjoy feeling him pressed against me again, holding me in place while his mouth touches mine. Christ on a cracker, I’m in trouble.
When Asher pulls out a keycard giving him unrestricted access to my brother’s place, I know I shouldn’t be shocked, but I am. Again. He and Seth clearly weren’t so far estranged from each other that my brother trusted him enough to give him access to his place, at any time.
I knew in my gut that trusting Asher was the right thing to do, and watching him quietly open the door to scout around the entry to make sure it’s safe before allowing me to enter only serves to make me stupider for him. He has to have a girlfriend because if he’s typically like this in everyday life, all growly and protective, then there’s not a sane single woman who’d let him pass by without trying to sink their claws in him.
He checks the entire apartment, going room to room, including rifling through all the closets, peeking under the beds, and exposing a safe room I had no idea existed. “He hasn’t been home in a while. I’ve driven over here every day after I’ve gotten off of work since he won’t return any of my calls.”
“Mistake number one. It’s most likely how those pricks found you to terrorize you. By seeing you here each day, showed them you’re someone important to Seth, and then they took the easy route by following you home. You’re lucky you’re not already dead. They could’ve snuck into your place the first night they tracked you, raped you, and then slit your throat without an issue.”
His reprimand has a fresh wave of tears filling my eyes. I’m already an emotional mess over my family being gone and also from worrying about Seth so much. Add in the poor dose of reality and it has my throat burning, as I suddenly feel like the foolish little girl he’s probably seen me as for so long. No wonder he teases me as jailbait . I must seem like such a na?ve fool compared to the people he’s used to in the world he lives in, because apparently, it’s nothing like mine anymore.
“Ah, shit. I didn’t mean it like that, Lacey. The last thing I want is to see you cry. Come ‘ere beautiful.” He tugs me into his chest, wrapping his strong arms around me, making the safe feeling fall over me once more, and suddenly I’m sobbing. Once I start, I can’t seem to stop myself. I hate being a crybaby, hate, hate, hate it, but the waterworks just start and then suddenly they’re pouring out before I have a chance to process the dam has even been broken.
With a sniffle, I immediately begin apologizing. “I’m s-sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m stupid, and it’s fine. I know you probably think I’m wasting your time and I’m sorry, and I j-just don’t know what to do. I’m sad and stressed. Worried to the point of being sick over it all, and you’re the only one I know who can help. I’m sorry.”
His hand moves to my chin, and roughly, he tilts my face up, shocking me enough so my wide eyes meet his furious stare. His nostrils flare as he blows up, “You stop that shit right the fuck now, you hear? Never, and I mean fucking never, call yourself stupid again in my presence. You feel me? And don’t apologize. Not to me about this, not ever about any of it. You have every right to be upset and scared. You’re allowed to feel however it is you’re feelin’ and deal with those emotions in the way that suits you. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently or make you feel unworthy of expressing yourself. Understand?”
Stunned at his outburst, all I can do is nod several times before he’s tugging me back to his sturdy frame and holding me tightly while I have a good cathartic cry. By the time my tears dry up, my nose is clogged, eyes are scratchy, tired, and swollen, and my head pounds something fierce. I felt like such an idiot earlier for my outburst, but then he validated my emotions and it was like I couldn’t get close enough to him or the tears out fast enough. My shoulders slump, body worn out from the overwhelming stress and also the touch of relief I now feel after the massive dump of emotions I just experienced.
He kindly suggests, “How about you grab some clothes from here, if you have any, and we’ll take them back to the club with us.”
“We’re not going to my apartment?”
He shakes his head, “Nah. You’ve dealt with enough today.”
“But I’m scared to go home alone later,” I softly admit. I’m scared of everything at this point, especially after he so plainly laid it out about what could’ve easily happened to me the first night those men followed me home. My stomach clenches and twists with the mere thought of going home eventually.
“Haven’t you figured it out yet?”
“What?”
“I’ll always protect you.”
And because it’s Asher, I know he means it.