Toxic Devotion

Chapter One

Neil

HE WATCHED the condensation run down the side of his glass. He hadn’t taken a single sip of the whiskey and the liquid’s amber color was getting lighter as the ice cubes melted. He brushed his fingers down the side of the glass, trying his best not to think. Thinking could sometimes be his worst enemy. If he began to think, then he’d likely begin to remember, and there was too much fucked up shit in his head that he didn’t want to remember.

He was sitting at the bar of his upscale DC hotel. He often found that the more exclusive the hotel, the less attention he attracted. That, and everyone was always more discreet, and discretion was something he greatly appreciated. Especially in his line of work.

He’d been a quiet kid. Smart but too serious for most other kids. Back then, he’d thought he might go into accounting or perhaps become a financial analyst or an auditor. That’s what he’d been headed toward in college when he’d been headhunted by the CIA. Even all these years later, he still wasn’t sure what the recruiter had seen in him that made him think he’d be a good asset for the Agency. His first big operation had started out incredibly successful, and then it had crashed and burned epically a few years later.

Losing officers and assets was a part of the game, but Derek Stanton stood out to him like no one else ever would. He’d put together a team of outcast Marines who were already damned good at their jobs, but together? With other Marines they didn’t have to hide their sexualities or disabilities from? The Black Raiders had excelled beyond his wildest dreams. Then he’d lost them all. Only one to death, but the loss was much the same. He kept an eye on them even now, pulling whichever strings he needed to in order to ensure their lives and careers stayed on track. He felt he owed them at least that much.

A sigh escaped his lips, and he pushed his glass away knowing he wouldn’t be taking another sip tonight. Drowning himself in alcohol never worked. Nowadays, it simply gave him one hell of a headache in the morning. He wasn’t getting any younger. In fact, he was getting closer to forty than he liked to admit.

He turned on his bar stool, just about to head out of there when a man walked through the door. It was as if his presence changed the atmosphere of the room the second his black oxford shoes hit the beige carpet. His dark hair was glistening from the raindrops caught in it. He was wearing a three-piece suit. Tailored. Expensive. A stylish navy-blue color that suited his tan skin perfectly. His five o’clock shadow was the only part of him that looked just the tiniest bit unintentional.

When he walked closer and his dark eyes landed on Neil, it was like a kick to the chest and air seemed to elude him. He knew exactly what this man was. Could see it in his eyes. In the way he held himself. The way he scanned the room and kept a cautious eye on everyone around him.

He walked right up next to Neil and placed a hand on the bar as he leaned toward the bartender.

“Whiskey. Neat. Make it a double,” the man said, his voice deep and commanding.

Neil suppressed a shiver.

The bartender placed a tumbler on the bar and Neil watched the man throw back the whole three ounces of whiskey and arched a brow at him.

“Rough day?”

The man turned toward him as he put down the tumbler. He looked at Neil for a very long second before he said, “You could say that.”

Neil’s lips quirked, decision already made.

“Want me to make it better?”

The man leaned against the bar and ran his gaze over Neil ever so slowly. In a place like this, he might mistake Neil for an escort, but if the man was what he thought he was, he’d know the truth. They were both dangerous men and together? He had a feeling they’d be explosive.

“You got a room?” the man asked, the hungry look he gave Neil making him fight to repress a shiver.

He nodded, slipping off his stool to lead the way to the elevator. He felt the man behind him the whole way, his pulse thrumming in his veins in anticipation. They stepped into the elevator, and he hit the button for his floor and the second the doors closed behind them, he looked at the man who was either going to kill him or give him the best night of his life. Right then, he didn’t care which it would be.

He ran his gaze over the man, enjoying the way his suit fit so damned well. He had a thing for expensive men in expensive suits. It almost never ended well for him.

“You haven’t given me your name.”

Neil looked up at him, his lips pulling into a wry smile.

“You don’t want it.”

“Was that an observation or a statement?”

“You can call me Gray.”

The man stared into his eyes and said, “Seems fitting enough.”

He’d been told many times how his eyes looked like a lifeless gray void. He didn’t mind. It kept people from trying to get too close.

“I’m Marco.”

The elevator came to a stop with a low ding, the doors sliding open to reveal an empty hallway.

“Well, Marco, I think we’ve done enough talking.”

Marco’s eyes darkened, his lips pulling up at one corner.

“Yes, I think we have,” Marco said, grabbing Neil by his shirt to jerk him close and slam their mouths together. The kiss was rough, all teeth and forceful tongues. Just what he needed.

A wave of lust washed over him, his cock going from half-hard to pressing against his zipper in less than a second.

He let Marco drag him out of the elevator, hand shooting out to catch the door before it hit them. He was backed up against a wall, Marco’s body pressing into him. Feeling the man’s hard cock against him had his blood thrumming, heat surging through him.

He slid his hands into the man’s hair, holding on as Marco ravaged his mouth, that wicked tongue of his driving him crazy with need.

Marco pulled away only to put his lips to the side of Neil’s neck, teeth scraping and making Neil’s eyes roll into the back of his head while a moan escaped him.

His breaths were getting ragged, lust burning in his veins.

He tried to dig his keycard out of his back pocket, but he had trouble concentrating on anything but Marco and his lips and hands. He felt the heat from Marco’s hands through his shirt as he ran them up his sides. He couldn’t wait to feel them on his skin.

A hand slid into Neil’s hair, fingers grabbing a handful and jerking his head back. His eyes snapped open along with his mouth, a pained grunt falling from his lips as he stared into Marco’s dark gaze.

“I need you in a bed,” Marco said, his words laced with lust.

Marco stepped back, letting go of Neil who took a second of just staring at the gorgeous man in front of him. His hair was a mess, the top buttons of his dress shirt undone, and his tie was gone. He looked fucking glorious as he stood there completely still with hunger in his dark eyes.

Neil pushed away from the wall to grab his keycard and then he walked the few steps to his door. Before he could slide the card into the reader by the door, Marco stepped up behind him, thick cock pressing against Neil’s ass while Marco’s hand grabbed Neil’s cock through his pants.

Lips brushed against his ear. “You gonna be good for me?”

He had to place a hand on the door to keep upright because his knees threatened to buckle underneath him.

“You gonna bend over for me, Gray?”

Marco’s breath against his skin was an exquisite torture he could get used to very fucking fast.

“Will you take all of me inside you?”

The only answer he had was a whimper that turned into a wanton moan when Marco rubbed him through his pants.

“Better get that door open, then,” Marco said, hand disappearing and leaving Neil close to begging. “Or I’ll just take you right here.”

He wasn’t sure he’d ever been as turned on as he was right now. He sure as fuck hadn’t been with someone as dangerous as Marco before. As much as he wanted to tell Marco to just take him right there in the hallway, he didn’t think the other guests or the staff would be too happy with them, and he wanted Marco for much longer than the few minutes they could get out here.

He slammed the keycard into the reader and the second the light blinked green, he had the door open and was stepping inside. There was a short hallway that led to a small living area with two couches to the left and right across from that was the bedroom. He’d splurged for a bigger room because it was paid for by the Agency. The bathroom was the same size as the bedroom with both a tub and a shower. He’d wanted a bit of luxury in his life for once.

Marco was unbuttoning his waistcoat with quick and easy movements and Neil slid his hands up the man’s chest, pushing both the waistcoat and the jacket off the man’s shoulders and onto the floor.

Marco grabbed his hand and tugged him through the French doors toward the bed.

“Take my shirt off,” Marco said.

Neil smiled, not because he wasn’t going to do it, but because for once someone else was in charge and he found he liked it a hell of a lot coming from Marco.

He slowly undid button after button on Marco’s dress shirt, intently aware that Marco was on the precipice of snapping. He wanted that. He wanted it so fucking much he had to bite his cheek to keep from coming in his pants.

When Marco’s shirt was hanging open, he ran his fingers from Marco’s belly button all the way up to his shoulders. He looked up and got caught in Marco’s dark gaze. He knew the secrets behind those eyes. He knew what kind of man Marco was and he only wanted him that much more because of it.

He pushed Marco’s shirt off his shoulders and stepped back to run his gaze over the man’s drool-worthy chest. The man’s wide shoulders, thick biceps, and six-pack told Neil that he worked out. He looked damned good.

“Sit,” Marco ordered.

The bed was behind Neil but all he did was look at Marco, a teasing gleam in his eyes. He wanted the man’s hands on him, and he got it when Marco stepped forward and with a hand on Neil’s chest, pushed him to sit down on the bed.

Marco moved his hand up Neil’s chest to wrap around the back of his neck.

“You’re trouble, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” he said, grinning up at Marco.

Marco’s lips twitched. “Take my cock out.”

He nearly groaned. His fingers had no trouble freeing Marco’s cock from his pants. He left the pants around Marco’s hips and surged forward, lips wrapping around Marco’s thick cock.

Marco hissed and the sound had Neil’s eyes falling shut. He sucked harder, took him deeper. Marco’s cock was hard and hot in his mouth and the man’s deep groan had his own cock leaking.

“Enough.”

The cock in his mouth felt too good for him to stop so he didn’t. His dick was pressing hard against the zipper of his pants, but the bite of pain kept him from coming too soon so he left it like that.

His head was jerked back, Marco’s cock slipping out of his mouth. He met Marco’s gaze, unsurprised to see lust and something a lot darker swirling in those intricate brown eyes.

“Trouble,” Marco said with a shake of his head before stepping back, hand sliding out of Neil’s hair.

Neil didn’t waste a second. He tugged his shirt over his head and jerked his belt open so he could get to the button and zipper.

“You got supplies?”

He glanced up at Marco, then pointed toward his bag in the corner by the French doors. While Marco got them lube and condoms, he got rid of the rest of his clothes. His cock was hard and begging for friction, but he didn’t touch it. He kept his gaze on Marco and when the man stood and turned around, the way he sucked in a breath when he saw Neil naked on the bed had him grabbing the sheets while his breathing got shallower.

Marco was across the room in a split second, supplies dropping onto the bed before he crawled between Neil’s legs, hands sliding up his thighs.

“Turn,” Marco ordered, and Neil rolled onto his stomach, pulling his knees under him.

“Just fuck me,” he gasped out when he felt Marco’s slick fingers between his cheeks.

Prep was unnecessary. He wanted it to hurt. He wanted to feel everything. He wanted to bleed. He needed Marco to make him bleed one way or another. He needed to feel something .

Marco hummed, then pushed Neil’s face into the mattress and all he could do was groan and arch his back. The man was younger by a good bit but the power he exuded was heady as fuck.

A single finger entered him, and if he could speak, he would’ve cursed Marco. The man was clearly intent on torturing him. He certainly wasn’t going to take orders from Neil. No, he was the one giving the orders.

He rocked back onto Marco’s digit, unsurprised when fingers dug into his hip to stop him. Marco was in control, and it was so fucking hot. He needed that desperately.

“You want more?” Marco asked, his tone almost teasing.

Marco pulled out his finger, his hands grabbing Neil’s ass cheeks to pull them apart, and Neil could only groan into the mattress when Marco spat on his hole. He could’ve come right then.

When two fingers entered him, he almost thanked Marco. He needed that slide. That friction. But more than anything, he needed to come on that man’s cock.

While Marco stretched Neil’s hole, he reached under Neil, his other hand sliding along his side until his fingers wrapped around Neil’s cock. Marco stroked him with slow and deliberate strokes, his hold loose. He was playing with him. Letting him know who was in control. As if there was any doubt. He would fall to his knees for this man, and he didn’t even know why. Was it the confidence he exuded? Was it that air of danger that followed him around? Was it that knowing look in eyes so dark they were almost black? Was it the knowledge that this man could kill him but instead chose to give them both the pleasure they so desperately needed?

Marco pushed three fingers inside him, twisting them and making curses fall from Neil’s lips because he wanted more. He wanted Marco inside him desperately. He wanted the man to fuck him until that thread of tightly-wound control of his snapped.

Those fingers felt so good even if it wasn’t enough. He wanted more and Marco knew it. Marco pulled his hands away and despite trying, Neil couldn’t hold back a sound of protest. He was rolled onto his back and watched as Marco settled between his thighs, rolling a condom down his thick cock. His own cock was rock hard and precome was pearling at the tip. Marco noticed too and he wore a wicked smile as he ran his thumb through it, making Neil hiss and then groan when he sucked that thumb into his mouth.

Marco leaned over him and kissed him gently only to suck his bottom lip between his teeth so he could bite down. Neil winced, cock jumping, and more precome smearing over his stomach.

“You ready for me Gray?”

He didn’t think he’d ever really be ready for Marco, but he still nodded.

The second that cock spread him wide, a deep moan escaped him, and his eyes rolled into the back of his head.

Fuck.

This was exactly what he needed. Marco was exactly what he needed.

Marco pulled back until only the thick head of his cock remained inside Neil, spreading his hole wide and making the muscles twitch.

“Marco,” he gasped out, unable to get any more words past his lips.

Marco let out a dark chuckle and snapped his hips against Neil’s ass, driving his cock deep inside him. Marco set a fast and brutal pace, fucking Neil with complete abandon.

“Fuck. You feel so good,” Marco said, his deep voice making Neil shiver.

He scrambled, needing to hold onto something while Marco plowed into him. All he could reach was the sheets under him and he bunched them in his hands as unintelligible sounds left his mouth.

He watched Marco, watched that dark look in the man’s eyes as he fucked him. It was heady. Having the man look at him like that. Like he wanted to devour him.

He reached for his cock, wrapping his hand around it, and began stroking with fast movements. Marco’s gaze dropped to watch Neil jerk his cock and when he looked back up, there was so much need in that brown gaze that Neil felt his breath stutter.

Fingers wrapped around his throat, and he couldn’t give a shit if Marco killed him or not. He arched up into the touch, wanting more. The hand around his throat tightened, putting more pressure on the sides of his neck and sending sparks of adrenaline and lust through him. Marco could easily kill him like this, and it only heightened his pleasure. It only made him come that much harder.

He gasped, his orgasm hitting him with the force of a truck, come smearing across their stomachs while Marco chased his own high. Marco snapped his hips hard against Neil, driving his cock deep inside him and leaving him a quivering mess.

Marco groaned and stilled for a breathless moment before he collapsed on top of Neil, his hands going from Neil’s throat to rest on the mattress by his head.

They were both sweaty and out of breath and as he ran his fingers up Marco’s back, the man shivered. He closed his eyes and as he slowly came down from the high, he knew he’d want to chase it with this man over and over.