12. Preston
PRESTON
At this rate, I’m going to flunk out of school. When I show up on campus and all I can think about is finding Emma, it doesn’t really speak well for my GPA.
But the last thing I care about this morning is going to class.
She has to be around here somewhere, unless she was too sick to come in.
It did sound like she was throwing up pretty hard last night.
Maybe I’m wasting my time as I walk around campus, acting like I’m minding my business but always watching out for her.
It’s an obsession. Or an addiction. Is this what it feels like to be caught up in the grip of something I know is only going to hurt me in the end?
Seeing the dependence for what it is, knowing I need to do something about it, wondering if there’s any chance.
Like I’m kidding myself if I think I can break free.
Knowing there’s part of me that doesn’t want to.
Because as complicated as life is because of her, I can’t remember the last time I felt this focused or alive.
Like instead of going through the motions every day, there’s a reason to get out of bed and go to school.
Not only because somebody expects me to, but because I want to.
I want to see her, even if that comes along with her attitude.
Walking into the science building, I check my phone for the time.
I have twenty minutes until biology on the second floor.
The idea of going back out there and taking another lap of the quad occurs to me—until I spot those familiar curls coming down the hall, bobbing with every step she takes as she comes my way.
And all of a sudden, I can breathe easier than before.
Like I’ve accomplished something, strange and inexplicable as that sounds.
There’s something gratifying about the way her expression shifts when she looks up and sees me watching her progress. She goes from distracted to disgusted, but instead of offending me, all it makes me want to do is put myself in her way.
“Good morning,” I offer when she’s close enough. “How are you feeling today? I didn’t think you’d show.”
Rolling her eyes, she shifts her backpack over her shoulder. “What? Was I supposed to be too afraid of seeing you?”
“Should you even be here today after the way you were hurling last night?” She still doesn’t look good—pale and tired, the way she was at the house.
It won’t stop her from being a stubborn pain in the ass, though. “I’m fine. Thanks for your concern.”
“At least we know it wasn’t the lasagna,” I joke. The way she rolls her eyes tells me she doesn’t think it’s funny. “You didn’t really eat any of it, did you?”
“What are you getting at?” she mutters, eyeing the people walking past. Almost like she doesn’t want to be seen with me and hopes they don’t notice. “I think I had something for lunch that didn’t sit well on my stomach. Is that a crime?”
No, but she’s acting so guilty and defensive, and it makes me wonder. “What are you trying so hard to hide?”
Her mouth falls open before snapping shut. “I don’t have time for this.”
“Wait a minute. I’m serious,” I grit out when she tries to walk around me. Let her roll her eyes and stomp her foot all she wants. That’s not going to make me move. “It’s obvious there’s something you don’t want anybody to know. Not even your grandma.”
After a few slow blinks, she shakes her head. “What’s it like to live in your head? I can’t decide if it’s a horror movie or one of those brainless comedies that are only funny to stoners.”
“Yeah, sure. Be a smartass. Try to distract me. But it’s not going to work.
” I slide my hands into my pockets, planting my feet in case she thinks she can push past me.
“It’s obvious you’re full of shit with these visits to your grandpa.
Who are you really going to the hospital for?
Why doesn’t your grandma know about it?”
She slowly pulls her head back, then scrunches up her face. “You’re deluded. And it’s none of your business, anyway. Get out of my life.”
It’s a little too late for that.
“But speaking of my grandma,” she adds, dropping her voice to a growl, “you had no right following me home. It’s not bad enough you and your brother have made it your mission to mess with my life. You even broke my necklace. Why would you bring her into this? Are you completely insane?”
I don’t want to think about the necklace. About the way she howled like a hurt animal. “Oh, come on. It made her happy, thinking you actually had a friend.”
“You’re psychotic,” she hisses, almost spitting out every word.
“Now get out of my way and get out of my life. Because as uncomfortable as you’ve made me,” she adds with narrowed eyes, “I can make it worse for you, and you know what I mean. So maybe give that some thought for the next time you have nothing better to do than stalk me.”
It’s like she touched a match to a powder keg inside my skull. It’s about to explode as we stand here, face-to-face, with people all around to witness the aftermath. Instead of giving them a show, I reach out and grab her by the elbow.
“What are you doing?” she whines, but she doesn’t put up a fight as I drag her into the closest empty room. A lab, dark now, quiet. She’s still sputtering and grunting when I close the door, then stand with my back to it so she can’t get out.
“Is this the game we’re playing now?” She pinches the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes shut. “Like you said, I was just puking my guts up last night, and I’m still feeling tired. I don’t have it in me to deal with you right now, Preston.”
I wish it didn’t sound so good when she says my name.
“I just want to know one thing.” I wait for her to open her eyes before asking, “Who are you really visiting at the hospital?”
“This again? What is wrong with your brain? No, I’m serious.” She sighs. “You think I’m sneaking around, lying to my grandma? And even if I was, would it be any of your business at all? Why don’t you just leave me alone?”
There’s something about the way she says it that makes my breath catch.
A throb of desperation. The thing is, she doesn’t know how hard I’ve tried.
I want to leave her alone. I want to pretend she doesn’t exist. I wish I could go back to a time before I ever set eyes on her. Everything was less complicated.
“Who is it?” The longer she refuses to admit she’s lying, the more determined I am to pull the truth out of her. “All you have to do is tell the truth, and you can leave.”
“I am telling the truth.”
“That’s a lie. Or else why was that sweet grandma of yours so surprised when she heard you were visiting your grandpa? Do you think we’re that stupid?”
“Do you really want to hear the answer to that question?”
“Is it a boyfriend?” A flash of heat follows the question. Something bitter and dangerous that takes my blood from simmering to boiling. “Oh, is that what it’s all about? You don’t want to tell her you’re seeing somebody?”
“I can’t decide if you’re serious or not.” She tips her head to the side, eyes narrowing. “Is that seriously where your brain goes? You think I’m secretly seeing someone she wouldn’t like, so I’m making up stories? Do you think you, like, got me into trouble?”
That’s when she makes the biggest mistake she could.
That’s when she laughs. The sound grates against my raw nerves—here I am, almost drowning in white-hot jealousy when I imagine her sneaking off to see some douchebag.
She has the nerve to laugh, because she keeps forgetting who she’s dealing with.
Obviously, I need to remind her. Nobody laughs at me.
The sound cuts off when I grab her by the shoulders and press my fingers in deep until I swear I can feel her bones shifting. “Laugh all you want,” I warn while she takes short, sharp breaths. “We’ll see if you’re laughing when I go to your house and compare notes with Grandma Lois.”
“What is wrong with you?” There’s something about the way she asks, the look on her face, the disbelief in her voice. “Why would you do this?”
That’s an interesting question. I wish I knew the answer.
“Should I talk to her?” I ask.
“No. You shouldn’t.”
Fuck. She is hiding something. She just won’t say what. In my head, I see myself shaking her like a rag doll, screaming in her face, threatening all kinds of pain and ugliness if she doesn’t come clean.
But for now, there’s another way, and it might at least help lighten some of the rage that is starting to swell out of control and block out all sound outside of the roar of blood in my ears. “On your knees.”
Her jaw drops. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Get on your knees. You don’t want me to go to your house and talk to Grandma?” Holding her in place with one hand, I use the other one to cup myself. Just the thought of having her that way makes me swell. “Then you suck me off here and now, Emma. That’s the price.”
Tears fill her wide, disbelieving eyes while her teeth sink into her lip. “I… I’m not…”
All at once, though, her expression hardens. Like she’s made up her mind. The fact that she starts to sink to her knees confirms it.
“You haven’t sucked a lot of dick?” I ask, opening my belt and unbuttoning my shorts. The boxer briefs underneath are too tight now, thanks to my dick straining the way it is, jutting out in front of me. “Don’t worry. I’ll show you.”
She doesn’t say a word or even look up, focusing her attention on me lowering the elastic waistband so my rigid dick can be free. She’s really innocent, isn’t she?
A sizzle of anticipation dances up my spine. I’m going to teach her. I’m going to train her in how to please me. Because I already know this won’t be the last time I have her this way. Not now, looking down at her, filled with anticipation.
“Wrap your hand around it. Touch it,” I urge, holding my breath until she does. A wave of pleasure washes over me, pure and sweet, making me almost weak in the knees before I get a hold of myself. “Run your hand up and down. Feel how hard I am for you. Feel what you do to me.”
The disgusted little grunt she lets out makes me chuckle before I cover her hand with mine and direct myself toward her mouth. “Open up. Start sucking.”
Her tongue darts over her lips, a nervous gesture that makes excitement leak from my tip. “I have all day,” I murmur, knowing it’s only pissing her off.
Finally, she takes a deep breath, squares her shoulders, and parts her lips so I can guide myself inside her waiting mouth. “Relax your throat,” I warn when she gags. “Throw up on me and we’re going to have a big problem. And I’ll make you make it up to me,” I promise.
That seems to get through to her because she adjusts quickly. Slowly, her lips move down my shaft, sending indescribable heat racing through my body, lighting me up. She’s clumsy, inexperienced, but she’s working hard and that makes up for a lot of it. She’s working so hard to please me.
“That’s right. Just like that. Don’t stop.
” This is incredible. Voices pass outside in the hall while I’m in here, wrapped in the wet heat of her mouth, with her tongue sliding along my underside and her soft grunts reaching my ears in time with my dick hitting the back of her throat.
Nobody has any idea what’s going on in here. How I own her.
My hips move faster, and my fingers sink into her curls, taking control of her head so I can fuck her face in these last seconds when I’m barely holding on, walking the thin line between pleasure and release.
The tension builds in my core and a tingling sensation starts to tickle the base of my spine, telling me this is almost over.
I don’t want it to be. I want this to last forever.
Totally developed in sweet sensation while Emma gags and whimpers.
“Here it comes,” I rasp. There’s no hope. I’m going to lose it. “I’m going to come in your mouth. You ready? Swallow it. Take it.”
When the rush overtakes me, I let go with a long, deep growl. She lets out a strained whimper as I fill her mouth, but has nowhere to go with me holding her head like I am. All she can do is take every drop like I told her to, until I start to soften, drained. Satisfied.
At least, for now.
She’s trembling as she gets on her feet, ignoring the hand I extend to help her. Refusing to look at me, too. “I think you bought my silence.”
“Good.” That’s all she says before grabbing her backpack, eyes on the floor, rushing out of the room while I straighten myself out and finish catching my breath. Yes, she bought my silence today. For now.
All I have to do is find a way to explain it to Easton, because this isn’t something we’ve ever talked about when it comes to her. I just hope he doesn’t get the wrong idea.
Though, I’m not sure what the wrong idea would be, because I don’t know how to feel anymore. I only know I want an excuse to do that again. Whether she wants to or not.