Chapter Fifty-Four #2
The telephone rang on her bedside table.
She looked at the caller I.D. Mom. Kara rolled over, staring into her closet.
Part of her yearned to pick it up and thank Mimi for all the years she’d given up to protect her, and to make sure her mother was okay after all they’d been through, but she wasn’t ready.
If she spoke to Mimi, she might not have the resolve to leave town—even though now that resolve had become a thin, frayed thread.
She knew her mother might misconstrue her silence for anger, but Kara didn’t understand exactly what she was feeling, so how could she portray her struggle to anyone else?
Her mother had risked her life to save her.
That was clear to Kara now. Mimi had given up everything, all those years ago, to protect Kara, and to give her a life without fear.
It occurred to Kara just how much she’d depended on Mimi, and taken her for granted in so many ways.
It would be easy to fall back into that pattern and let Mimi pick up the pieces of Kara’s shredded life.
How could Kara walk away? Guilt tightened in her chest. Did she owe it to her mother to forgo her own dreams in order to insure her mother’s happiness? Would it ensure her happiness?
Her entire life had been a sham. Mimi may not have been her biological mother, but she was the only mother Kara had ever known, and she fit the very definition of mother in every way.
Still, Kara wondered what else she’d lied to her about.
Kara had begun to question everything. When she’d first awoken from her coma, she’d had flashes of memories.
She didn’t know if they were real or not, and she had no one to ask.
Her mother had been through enough. Kara didn’t want to upset her any more by asking about her past, but inside she was terrified.
If her brother was psychotic, was she? When would her craziness become apparent?
What could she do to stop it? What if she was the crazy one?
Kara decided it didn’t matter why she had originally wanted to leave.
Her decision to go to nursing school was a good one.
She needed a new life. She needed a life.
Period. She was sick of hiding out in her apartment.
She’d been front-page news in their town for two weeks after the incident, and second page news for a day in the neighboring cities.
Even the reporters, several of whom she’d gone to school with, had told her to just hide out for a while.
She had so many unanswered questions, and no one to turn to.
Kara rolled back over and listened to her mother’s message.
“Kara, it’s Mom. I…I’m sorry, honey.” Mimi sniffled. “Please, just talk to me, let me explain.” A tear rolled down Kara’s cheek. “It’s almost Christmas. Can’t we please talk?” Mimi pleaded.
Kara rolled over with a heavy heart and screamed into her pillow.
The following Monday, Kara awoke knowing what she had to do.
She opened the drawer next to the refrigerator and removed the letter.
She ran her fingers over the return address, University of North Carolina.
Her heartbeat accelerated with every passing second.
She walked to the living room and sat down on the couch.
The sun beamed in through the window, illuminating a bright streak across her toes.
Kara bit her lower lip, crossing her legs and kicking her feet up and down with excitement.
She put the letter beside her on the couch and steepled her hands.
Could she do this? Could she leave her mother, her town?
The phone interrupted her thoughts. She couldn’t spend her life running away from her mother, or dodging Daryl and Kelly, or everybody else in town who would point fingers and talk beneath their breath for years to come.
She didn’t want to be that girl who got attacked, or that girl with the crazy brother.
She picked up her keys and headed out the door.
The Sheetz parking lot was empty when Kara arrived.
She swiped her card through the gas pump, started the flow of gas, then walked into the Food Mart.
It felt good to do something normal for a change.
She couldn’t watch any more television, and she missed attending her classes.
She even missed going to work everyday, though she’d left that job for good.
The mere thought of smelling coal again made her pulse race.
She hadn’t been in Sheetz since the incident.
She filled a Styrofoam cup with coffee, added a dab of cream and sugar, then walked to the candy aisle.
She stared at the chocolate bars and Skittles.
She didn’t even want candy, but she thought it might make her feel better. The bell on the front door jingled.
Kara felt eyes boring into her. She looked up just in time to see two giggling teenage girls, one whispering into the other’s ear. The girls flitted into the next aisle.
Kara’s muscles tensed. She’d hoped the gossip would have died down by now. She took her coffee up to the cash register.
The cashier turned to face her. Kelly Arnold. Great.
Kelly pursed her lips. “Kara.”
Kara shoved her money across the counter.
Kelly put the money in the cash register and handed Kara her change.
She let out a loud sigh, and said, “Look, I’m really sorry about…
everything. What you went through with that guy.
” She looked down, bit her upper lip, then looked back up at Kara and said, “And about coming between you and Daryl.” Kelly almost sounded sincere.
Kara wanted to cry, and she also wanted to yell.
Her marriage was over. She didn’t miss Daryl.
She didn’t even really care that he was with Kelly.
She simply missed having that special someone to come home to.
It could be anyone—she just missed being wanted.
Daryl had filled a void she’d felt for more years than she could remember.
She wondered now if that ache to be wanted was borne of the loss of Roland so many years before.
Or was her desire to be wanted, in some small way, a shadow of the same obsessiveness that Roland had felt?
She walked toward the door, reached for the handle, and hesitated. She was no longer going to be the victim. She turned toward Kelly, stood up straight, and said, “What you did was just as awful as what that guy did to me. You just used a different weapon.”
Kara strutted across the parking lot with a smirk.
She unhooked the gas pump from her car, settled her shaking self into the front seat of her car, and let out a whoop!
No longer would she be looked at as poor Kara.
The whole town knew about Daryl and Kelly.
The whole town knew about Roland and Mimi.
It was time for the whole world to know about the new Kara.