Chapter 32
EVE
It took a long time scrubbing my skin in the shower before I felt clean again.
Although I’d tried to clean up on the flight home, I’d missed bits and they seemed to stain.
Logically, yes, I knew the stain was all in my mind, but it still meant that by the time I was satisfied it was all gone, my whole body was as pink as a lobster.
Comfort was key in my shaken, traumatized, and frankly mind-blown state of being, so I dressed in my softest shorts and pulled on one of the boys’ T-shirts to sleep in. I wasn’t even sure whose it was until I buried my nose in the soft fabric and inhaled Haze.
With everything that’d happened in the last eight hours, I was asleep almost before my head hit the pillow. Of course, that only lasted long enough for the nightmares to set in, then it was all bullets flying, blood splattering, and the panicked need to breathe while someone cut off my airway and—
“Whoa, Lilith baby, wake up. It’s just a nightmare,” Ethan soothed, pinning my frantic hands together to stop me clawing at my own throat. “Hey, I’m here. You’re safe, Eve, you’re safe. I’ve got you.”
His murmured assurances slowly broke through my racing pulse and tightened lungs, and I forced myself to take some slower breaths to calm down.
“Just a nightmare,” I whispered in a husky voice.
“It wasn’t though. It was a memory.” Swallowing hard past the tears threatening to spill, I wriggled free of Ethan’s grip and stumbled through the dark to the bathroom.
Turning on the lights was confronting, seeing how pale I was, how bloodshot my eyes were.
Red scratches collared my throat where I’d been clawing at myself, blood running from a couple of the worst ones, and I stood there for the longest time just watching the slow trickle.
My father was still alive. He had been this whole time, and yet it’d taken until now for him to show his face?
Brodie had so many good points back there in that alleyway which actually hurt to acknowledge.
But shit…where the hell had Abraham been when I was fighting for my life in hospital after being shot in the back?
The realization that my father was an actual piece of shit gutted me.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I’d clung to the hope that it was all a big misunderstanding or that there were rational explanations for everything I’d been through.
Before I could even catch my whirling thoughts, the tears started falling and I collapsed to the bathroom floor in a puddle of self-pity and despair.
Ethan collected me up in his arms at some stage, carrying me back to my room, but I was too wound up to sleep again.
“I need some air,” I confessed, swiping the tears away from my face. “Can we go for a walk or something?”
He gave a pointed glance at my alarm clock, which displayed the time as three forty in the morning, then nodded. “Of course. Let me just grab some things while you put shoes on.”
Breathing a slightly deeper sigh of relief that he hadn’t told me no—for my own safety, no doubt—I quickly pulled on socks and sneakers, not bothering to change my shorts or T-shirt. No one would be around at this time of morning anyway.
Ethan met me downstairs in the foyer and silently held the front door open for me to exit ahead of him. Neither one of us spoke for several minutes, but when I reached for his hand he squeezed my fingers tightly with reassurance.
“Sorry I freaked out,” I finally said into the darkness as the trees gave way to campus buildings. It was all dark and silent and eerie, but I felt calmer already.
Ethan shook his head. “Nothing to be sorry about. You’ve been through a lot…and not just last night. I’m—we’re—here for you, whatever you need. Even if it is just a walk in the dark at three forty-five in the morning. But are you cold?”
A shiver ran through me and I rubbed my arms. “Kind of, yes. I didn’t think that through.”
“Here.” He shucked his coat and draped it over my shoulders. It was surprisingly heavy as I threaded my arms into the sleeves.
“What do you have stuffed in these pockets, Eth?” I teased with a little laugh, noticing how bulky they were.
He hummed thoughtfully, steering us toward the library. “Supplies,” he answered cryptically, then produced a set of keys. “Wanna go inside?”
To our special place? I couldn’t think of anything better.
Ethan used his professor privileges to unlock the doors and disarm the security system, before leading the way through to our spot.
Instead of turning on the overhead lights, he flicked on a couple of reading lamps to keep the ambience moody.
“Sit, Eve,” he told me with an edge of authority. It gave me a little shiver of anticipation. I did as I was told, parking my butt in a leather armchair.
“Yes, sir,” I purred in return, my lips turning up with a grin as he knelt on the carpet in front of me.
Ethan chuckled, reaching into one of the pockets of his coat that I still wore. “Cute, but I want to clean up your neck first.”
“First?” I repeated, already shifting my mind from self-pity and bone-deep paternal disappointment to something much more enjoyable. “Okay, we can do that first.”
Ethan hadn’t been kidding about packing supplies. He pulled out a tube of antiseptic cream and a handful of Band-Aids, which he set on the arm of the chair and got to work.
“Do you think we need to be concerned about your dad?” I asked as he dabbed stinging cream on my scratches. “That whole interaction with him was weird, right? Like he was just making sure we knew that he knew?”
Ethan hummed thoughtfully. “I think that’s exactly what he was doing. But more than that, he was sussing out our group dynamics.”
“Really?” I asked, hissing as his finger swiped over the worst of the scratches. “Why?”
“Because Vinnie Sullivan likes to think he’s the most powerful man in this region.
Having a school like Meadowridge with so many rich, influential families sending their next generation…
it's a thorn in his side. So much power, and just out of his reach. He has no jurisdiction on campus grounds, and he knows that if he breaks the rules his whole organization will be wiped out faster than you can say organized crime.”
That actually made a lot of sense. Meadowridge college prided itself on being the most safe and secure tertiary education in the country, so that meant the grounds—and everyone within it—were out of Vinnie’s reach. It must irritate the crap out of him.
“But,” Ethan continued, “he was previously content with the information and updates he received from both Connor and I—separately of course—giving him small insights into powerful families. Since we all moved into Bluebell House, I think we have all let our guards down a little too much. Been a little too familiar with one another on campus and off. We’ve inadvertently tipped our hands to Vinnie, and he’s sharp enough to notice. ”
I shook my head as Ethan put his supplies away and sat back on his heels. “Why is that such a bad thing? That he knows you and the guys are actually friends?”
Ethan blew out a long, frustrated sigh. “Because friendships, family, love…they’re all weaknesses in his books.
He worked exceptionally hard to drive a wedge between Connor and I as children, and now we both just went and fucked it all up by having each other’s backs.
Vinnie got what he wanted, and now…” He trailed off, running a hand through his hair with an edge of desperation.
“It doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t change anything.
Connor should know how much I regret our past grievances, and you should know that it’s because of your love that we’re all stronger as a unit.
As a team. Even if…even if Vinnie does do what I’m scared of. ”
“What are you scared of?” I asked, breathless with worry.
“That Vinnie will kill him.” The answer came from the shadows, and Connor stepped into our little bubble of warm light a second later. “So this is where you two have been getting down and dirty during the day. Not very private, but is that a kink thing?”
“No,” Ethan said at the same time as I replied with, “Yes.”
“Wait, you think Vinnie will kill you?” I asked, sitting forward to wrap my hand around the back of Ethan’s neck. “Why?”
Connor answered before Ethan could, “Because I foolishly showed him how much I care for our little family, and his greatest obsession in life is controlling me. He wants to break me down and build me up into the exact replica of himself, and he will use whatever means necessary. He can’t touch Andrew.
Haze would see him coming a mile away. And Brodie is too much of a public figure.
But Ethan? He’s disposable. Always has been.
” Connor delivered that information with very little emotion in his voice, like he was just stating facts, and it broke my heart.
Ethan’s resigned expression only served to make it all the more upsetting, because this wasn’t new information for him.
“When we were kids,” Ethan said softly, his hand on my thigh like he needed the physical connection as much as I did, “we used to be friends. My mother was a cleaner at the clubhouse, and there was a stretch of time when she’d take me to work with her.
Vinnie and his crew all slept most of the day, and Connor’s mom was happier shopping than looking after her own child, so my mom would look after both of us while she cleaned. We were…close.”
“We were brothers,” Connor agreed, his brow furrowed. “Until Vinnie caught you comforting me after my mom died. Then he started using your safety as a threat to make me do what he wanted and behave as he wanted his heir to behave.”
Ethan nodded sadly. “I resented you for letting him treat me like that, even though you were just a kid yourself.”
Their story was awful, but they were both here now, and they had genuine love for each other—it was just buried under all their years of trauma and abuse. “But what about the camp thing?” I asked, wetting my lips. “You said that experience brought the five of you together?”
“It did…when we were all together. But I quickly learned that showing Eth any kindness in front of Vinnie would only get him hurt. So I treated him like shit…as expected of me.” Connor dropped his hand to Ethan’s shoulder and gave him a little squeeze.
“I’m sorry, Eth. I didn’t fully understand how bad I’d let things get until you punched me in the face the other week. ”
Ethan let out a short laugh, looking up at his brother with a slight grin. “So you’re saying I need to punch you more often?”
Connor coughed a laugh and clipped his brother teasingly in the back of the head. “Watch it. I’m still the next Sullivan boss, remember?”
That prospect gave me chills. Would Connor really take on the role of gang leader as his father expected of him? If he didn’t…what would that mean for us? All of us?
“Vinnie is likely to make some desperate moves now that he’s seen how united the six of us are,” Ethan said thoughtfully. “I feel confident he won’t hurt Eve because of who her father is, but…nothing is impossible. We need to be more cautious now than ever before.”
Connor nodded his agreement. “Especially with his ticking clock. Vinnie doesn’t know that we know he’s been given a terminal diagnosis for his prostate cancer. It’ll only be a matter of time, but dying men make dangerous, unpredictable moves.”
The two darkly gorgeous Sullivan brothers shared a long look, and I hardly dared to breathe for fear of ruining the moment between them.
For the first time since getting to know them, I could really see a clear future for us.
They just needed to work together. And I could think of a great way to make that happen.
“This feels like a really positive step forward,” I whispered softly, biting my lip. “I think we should all kiss and make out. I mean up.”
Ethan laughed, then leaned forward and grabbed the back of my head, his fingers tangling in my hair as he crushed his lips to mine in a hungry, desperate kiss. “Careful what you’re offering, Lilith.”
“Oh, I’m fully aware of what I’m offering,” I replied with a laugh as he released my hair. “I just don’t think you two are in a secure enough position to deliver. And that’s okay, we can work on—”
“Did she just imply we’re too insecure for a three-way?” Connor cut me off, indignation etched all over his face. “Feels like you want us to call your bluff, brat.”
I shrugged, unable to wipe the smile off my face as I looked up at him. “Hey, Connie, if the insecure shoe fits…it’s okay to feel like your masculinity is threatened by your older brother’s bigger dick. I mean—”
“Sorry?” Connor spluttered, reaching out a hand to grab mine and haul me out of the armchair. “Brat, you better take that back or else.”
Excitement flared hot through my core, and I tilted my head back to meet his gaze. “Or else what?”
Ethan let out a low whistle, moving to sit in the armchair I’d just vacated.
“Sure sounds like she wants us to prove something, little brother.” He slouched back, legs spread wide and his sweatpants doing nothing to hide how quickly his dick was hardening.
“Are you going to give our Lillith brat what she wants, Con?”
Connor’s grip on my wrist tightened as he looked around the library. “Right here?”
“Why not?” I challenged. Uncertainty and lust combated for supremacy in his expression, so I made sure he knew beyond any shadow of doubt that I wasn’t just messing with him. I peeled his grip off my wrist, then sank to my knees in front of him, still holding eye contact all the while.
“Shit,” Connor whispered on a breathy exhale. “Why not indeed?”