CHAPTER 19
Sakura
He found her undesirable?
Sakura watched the two men walk away. She wasn’t sure what incensed her more: being dismissed by a peasant, or said peasant’s friend sneaking in as her guard.
Or Bunta obeying the guard over her.
Turning her back on them, she tried to straighten out her thoughts. She was supposed to be making Keenan fall in love with her. In theory, it shouldn’t be that hard, despite her previous expression of disinterest. After all, what man wouldn’t want the affection of a princess?
Keenan from Daraigh, apparently.
But why had Keenan pushed her away?
“Perhaps you should check the disdainful way you asked that.”
The gentle swish of dry meadow grass warned her of the conferring men’s approach. Pasting on a brighter version of her demure smile, she folded her hands in front of her waist and faced them. “Are you ready to continue? I should have brought extra horses for you and your companion, but we can—”
Keenan exchanged a look with the guard that had accompanied her.
Sakura took the opportunity to examine him more closely herself.
While she didn’t make a habit of studying the servants around her, she could have sworn that he looked like any other Ryunic guard when she left the winter castle. Now, his face was clearly foreign.
“This isn’t a journey for a princess,” Keenan said, bringing his eyes back to her. “We’ll be sleeping on the ground for weeks, and it will likely be dangerous. I’m sure Mori would gladly assist you and your maid back to the castle.”
“But I came to help you!” Sakura reminded him, trying to look like a besotted young lady. “I can find a more efficient way through the mountains.”
He lifted a skeptical eyebrow. “You’re familiar with the mountains? Enough to help me make sense of this map?”
The way-finder in Sakura’s waistband gave a gentle tug toward him. She’d spent too much time in the last few days focused on his location; she needed to adjust to the item they were hunting. But she didn’t think she could manage that while holding a conversation.
“My talents might surprise you.” She smiled mysteriously. “Now, shall we mount up? Since we’re short two horses, the young guard can ride with Kasumi, and you—” she squeezed her hands together— “can ride behind me.”
He gulped. “Thanks, but I’ll walk.”
“And waste all that time?” she scoffed. “Nonsense. If it were improper, I wouldn’t have suggested it.”
The older guard eyed him, but Keenan just shook his head and strode past her. “I appreciate the offer, but no. I prefer my own feet.”
“Wait!” She tried to follow, but she slipped on the unstable footing. The foreign guard caught her arm, steadying her. “This is absurd. You can’t be so desperate to avoid me that you refuse a ride. And I—I order you to listen to me!”
He stopped and spun on his heels. “I’m not from Ryuni, Princess,” he huffed. “I don’t have to take your orders.”
Gritting her teeth in frustration, Sakura smashed her eyes shut and focused her thoughts on the leverage for the Assembly. My greatest desire. The thing that will make all my dreams come true.
Instead of shifting to the leverage, the light around Keenan brightened in her mind. She ground her teeth. I already found him. Next step!
The light dimmed, then moved to the southwest. It flickered, looking almost murky this time, as if it were shielded. Did that mean Mother was correct about how important the item was?
She could ponder it later. Keenan was walking away, and she needed him to listen to her, even if he didn’t trust her yet.
“You should go east,” Sakura called after him. “The mountains are not passable directly south, and you will waste days searching for a route west.”
Keenan turned to her with an incredulous expression. “You know the way through the mountains?” His eyes skimmed over her. “You ride into the wilderness wearing a dress that belongs in a ballroom and expect me to believe that?”
Shaking his head, he resumed his southward march.
Fine. She’d let him learn the hard way.
Grabbing a fistful of her skirt, she stomped back to her horse. Keenan’s no-longer-missing companion helped her mount, then took his horse’s reins and walked after the weapon-smith, leaving her with Kasumi.
“He might be more receptive if you pretend it’s three years ago.”
Sakura gathered the reins and pressed her left leg against Aya’s side. The horse tossed her head once before stepping forward in a gentle walk.
Kasumi rode next to her, her head turned slightly toward Sakura as if awaiting a response. Sakura fixed her eyes straight ahead and pretended not to notice. She knew exactly what her maid meant, but she couldn’t let herself remember how it felt to be cordial with those beneath her.
“Do you even know the name of the guard from the winter castle?” Kasumi prodded. “Or the one that has traveled with us the last few days?”
Of course she didn’t. Once she learned a servant’s name, the expectation of basic interactions arose.
And if she allowed basic interactions, especially during the long, lonely months at the winter castle, it would likely lead to friendship.
Any friendship between Sakura and a servant or a guard would end in ruin.
And it wouldn’t be Sakura who suffered most.
“The young one is Kagemori, but everyone calls him Mori,” Kasumi volunteered. “The older one is Oliver. Or so Keenan called him; he never told me his name.”
Instead of replying, Sakura let her eyes find Bunta trotting a few yards ahead of her. The little fox stopped, lifted his nose to sniff at the air, then scurried away toward the distant trees.
“Bunta! Come,” she called. He slowed, looking over his shoulder at her before running eagerly back.
Why had he listened to Oliver over her? She’d seen the guard lightly pat his head once.
Nudging her horse a little closer, Kasumi lowered her voice and said, “I think Keenan likes you, but he won’t admit it while you’re acting like he and his friends are beneath you. If you’re serious about him, isn’t it worth lowering your pride enough to show concern for the people he cares about?”
Sakura’s head rotated slowly toward her maid. “Where would you get an idea like that?”
“That you’re interested in a relationship?” Kasumi asked with a little smile.
“That he returns my…affections,” Sakura corrected.
“He teased you before he left. He’s on a quest for your hand.” Kasumi gave a little shrug. “And he didn’t look repulsed when he helped you dismount.”
Those all sounded like terrible reasons. Keenan had stormed away from her at the castle. He was only still on course because Mother sent a guard with him. And he had clearly stated his distaste when Sakura tried to embrace him after the dismount.
But he had lingered for a breath before shoving her away. He had remembered her comment about perpetual motion. And when he’d recognized that the book on mechanics was her true choice, he’d acted as if it wasn’t a problem for a princess to be interested in the topic.
Just like Dai.
Her jaw stiffened. If he was like Daichi, then it was all the more reason she should be keeping her distance, rather than pretending to care for him. She shouldn’t entangle him in her complications.
But then, he was already entangled, wasn’t he?
And she wasn’t sure that she could set him free.