8. Chapter 7
Clark – Present Day – Twenty-Four Years Old
I slowly spin my phone in my hand, gently chewing my bottom lip, while confusion fills my mind and I stare at the screen, unsure what to do next.
For two nights in a row, Trick has been home.
He’s had dinner with us, put our daughter to bed, and then sat with me on the couch.
He is wearing sweats and a tank, his laptop is open, and his bare feet are on the coffee table with his wedding ring in full view while I decompress from the day with crappy TV.
We’re acting like an actual couple and I’m pretty sure he’s been sleeping in my bed—or his bed, or is it our bed? I mean we’re married, after all.
I shake my head. The past two mornings, the right side of the bed has been crumpled and slightly warm.
I’ve never rolled onto that side in the six years I’ve been forced to call his house home.
Both mornings he’s been in the kitchen making breakfast with our daughter, creating the family setting I always wanted.
Yet Lavender is wearing that necklace and she’s pregnant.
I groan, overwhelmed and confused.
“Okay, Dr. Bitch is on her break, talk to me,” Belle says as she rushes into the staff room, locking the door behind her. Dr. Bitch is the name we call Dr. Lavish because yeah, she’s a bitch, and despite Trick’s warning the other day, my chore list has doubled.
I swallow hard as I unlock my phone and stare at the picture of Willow and Trick after her first recital with Little Bird’s Ballet, Drew's ballet school, and my heart breaks bit by bit.
“Did you know my brother knows that I know about you two?” I try to deflect, and she snorts, “Yeah, he let it slip after your mom tried to give Nova a key to his house, and he hasn’t spoken to her since.”
“She’s the reason why you two are still under the radar,” I mutter.
It’s something I’ve figured out quite quickly.
I don’t speak to her. Heck, I haven’t even spoken to my dad or my brother in years.
But my mom has taken it to heart that I cut contact with her.
Even before everything, I was pulling away, but she stood back and let the men force a marriage on me and make me live here.
Now, she’s clinging onto Nova, it is pathetic what she’s trying to do with my brother.
“I know, and I understand his anger towards your mom, so stop deflecting and talk to me,” she says, and I bite down hard on my bottom lip.
“Mr. Holland called, the divorce papers are ready,” I whisper as I stare at the photo, “So is the custody agreement.”
“Are you sure you want to do this, Clark?” Belle asks gently, and I shake my head as I grip my phone and begin to pace.
“Two days ago, I would have told you hell yes, but now…” I choke, my emotions getting the better of me, and I stop before my friend, who is looking at me with concern.
“He claimed me, Belle, at a place where everyone knew it was a marriage of convenience. He’s been home for the first time ever, I-I… ”
A few tears fall, and I quickly swipe them away and begin to pace again, my mind all over the place.
“As soon as I got home from work the other day, I knew I was going to divorce him. I knew I needed to be the one to pull the plug on this marriage because he felt obligated to me, only to walk through the door and find him with our daughter. For the last two days I’ve had more communication with him than I have in the whole six years we’ve been married.
” I croak and pace quicker, but my phone rings, making me jump to a halt, and I swallow hard.
“It’s Trick,” I choke.
“Answer it,” she says.
“He never calls me,” I whisper, and Belle urges, “Answer it, Clark.”
I take a shuddering breath, and I answer it.
“Trick, is Willow okay?” I ask, not knowing why else he would call.
“She’s alright, buttercup, I just wanted to let you know that I’ve got church, so I’ll be missing her practice,” he says softly, and I swallow the lump that is forming and my heart clenches.
He’s never called to tell me he’ll be missing anything where Willow is concerned, it’s normally just a text.
I lock eyes with Belle’s wide ones, and I clear my throat and say, “Okay, I’ll uh, um, Belle will pick her up, I won’t be off in time, but I can bring her back with Drew.”
“Dr. Lavish put more shit on your list, buttercup?” he asks with a bit of a bite, and I widen my eyes at Belle as to say, I told you he’s being weird…
“It’s fine,” I mutter, “I’ll um, I should get there halfway through and –”
“Hey, baby, how was your day?” I hear, cutting my words off, and I flinch involuntarily, recognizing Lavender's voice.
Church? Yeah, right.
“F–”
I cut off whatever crap Trick was about to say to his mistress, and I say, “Look, my break is over, I’ll speak to you later.”
I hang up before he can say more and a sharp breath escapes me as the tears fall and I choke, "He's with Lavender. He said church, but he's with her." I look at Belle. "Whatever his reasons, I have to do this divorce and move on, even though it hurts."
Belle’s eyes tear up, and she rushes over, taking me in her arms and I cling to her, fighting to steady myself.
This is for the best—I know it.
***
“Okay, my munchkins, you all did so well today, and I am looking forward to seeing you all on the big stage next week!” Drew says to the eight five-year-olds, my little girl, being one.
Belle picked Willow up like we planned while I finished work, then stopped by Heavenly Law and the paperwork I’m currently clutching feels like a heavy weight in my hand.
I swallow hard, my heart clenching as I watch my little girl hug Drew's little bump, looking absolutely adorable.
She’s in a light blue leotard, and her dark red hair is in a little bun.
My little girl is my light. She’s why I get up each morning and the thought of her being forced into a loveless marriage makes me physically sick.
My hands shake as I grip the paperwork, glancing at it nervously.
If I try giving them to Trick, he’ll make a big deal, refuse, claim he has to keep me safe just because I had his child—but he isn’t obligated.
My father is a brother, my own brother is a brother, he didn’t need to marry me, and now, so he can focus on his girl and his unborn child. I’ve had the lawyer put a custody order together where he’ll have Willow for one night a week, starting tonight.
I also got it in writing that neither of our parents nor any of the brothers are ever alone with her.
They don’t have my trust, not where Willow is concerned.
I know it may seem harsh, but for five years, Trick never had her overnight.
My parents have had little contact with her, and the same goes for the rest of the club so what I’ve suggested isn’t any different.
I watch as Willow helps Drew tidy up, and I slowly stand, clutching the paperwork in my hand.
I need to put Drew in a situation where she’ll probably hate me.
“Go get your coat, munchkin,” Drew says to my girl, who rushes over to where her belongings are. I swallow hard as I slowly walk over to Drew.
“You seem out of it, Clark. Are you alright?” she asks softly, and I give her a smile that I know is probably a grimace.
“I need to ask you for a favor,” I whisper, and she tilts her head. Taking a deep breath, I say, “I need you to take Willow to Trick, he’ll have her for the night.” She frowns, and I choke, “And I need you to give him these.”
I hold out the paperwork, and she slowly takes it from me.
“Clark, please tell me you’re not leaving your husband…” She pleads quietly, and I swallow the lump forming.
“He’s not really my husband. He has a pregnant mistress. He hasn’t been faithful because it isn’t a real marriage, and honestly, I already had the protection of the club. He didn’t need to force me into this,” I reply, and she quickly looks at Willow, who is walking back to us.
“Where will you go?” she asks, knowing I live in Trick's house.
“I’ve rented a small two-bed apartment not far from the hospital,” I admit just as Willow takes my hand, and Drew's mouth drops.
“Are we going home now, Mama?” Willow asks, and I flinch but clear my throat to try and hide it as I kneel before her.
“No, sweetheart, tonight it will be a Daddy and Willow night, doesn’t that sound fun?” I whisper, and she grins wide, melting my heart, and I kiss her head before I murmur, “Mama will pick you up tomorrow after school,” as I stand up.
“Okay, Mama,” she says as she wraps her arms around my waist, and I wrap mine around her little body.
This will be the new normal, where I won’t always have her, and it’ll be hard, but in the long run, this is for the best.
“Are you sure about this, Clark? Have you thought this through?” Drew asks, and my eyes tear up, but I quickly blink, not needing to worry my five-year-old.
I admit, “I’ve thought of nothing else since his girlfriend showed at work with an ultrasound. Drew, I have to do this for me, I want a happily ever after, I want love, and Trick doesn’t love me.”
Her eyes tear up, and she nods.
“Okay, little dancer, Auntie Drew will take you to Daddy, and I will see you tomorrow, okay?” I say to Willow, and she nods before squeezing my waist, then grabs Drew's hand.
“Love you, Mama,” Willow says, and I choke back a sob before replying, “Love you too, little dancer,” before I turn and walk away. I head back to my car quickly before I change my mind, ready to spend the night crying in my empty apartment, feeling alone.
I'm making the right decision, I know I am—but if it’s right, why does it feel so wrong?