Chapter 10
Lessons in Touch
ETHAN
Trudging across the quad, my backpack heavy with textbooks after my evening lab, when a hand clamps around my bicep, yanking me backward.
"We need to talk." Ryan's voice is low and dangerous, a tone I've never heard from him before.
My heart hammers against my ribs. "Let go, Ryan."
He drags me toward the space between buildings, away from the few students still crossing campus. This is new. This is scary. Ryan's always been controlling, but he's never physically forced me anywhere.
"You're embarrassing yourself with those frat boys," he hisses, backing me against the brick wall. "Do you think they respect you? You're just their token gay friend."
"That's not true," I try to keep my voice steady when I'm starting to freak out inside. "And even if it was, it's none of your business. We're done."
When I try to sidestep him, he slams his palm against the wall beside my head. I flinch.
"We are not done until I say we're done." His eyes are cold, almost unrecognizable. "I let you have your little tantrum, but playtime's over."
My chest tightens. This isn't happening. This isn't the Ryan I dated, though maybe it always was, and I just never saw it.
"Let me spell it out for you," I’m trying to sound braver than I feel. "One: You cheated on me all summer. Two: You treated me like your dirty secret. Three: You only want me when someone else shows interest. Four: It's over."
His fingers dig into my arm hard enough to bruise. "No one walks away from me."
Pushing against his chest, my voice explodes out of my mouth. "Let GO!"
He grabs both my wrists, pinning them to the wall, and there’s a flash of genuine fear. This is escalating beyond anything that's happened before. His face is too close to mine, his breath hot against my cheek.
"You're mine, Ethan. You've always been mine."
"I don't think he's yours or anyone else's, actually."
The deep voice from behind him sends a wave of relief washing through me. I peek around Ryan's shoulder to see Gavin standing there, all six-foot-four of him looking like some kind of avenging angel in a DPO hoodie.
Ryan's grip tightens momentarily before he turns. "Stay out of this."
"Can't do that," Gavin says, his usual sunny smile nowhere to be seen. "See, Ethan asked you to let go. Twice. And you didn't. That's a problem."
"This isn't frat boy business," Ryan snarls, but I can see the calculation in his eyes as he takes in Gavin's size.
"It's human decency business," Gavin replies, stepping closer. "Now, how about you step away from him before this gets ugly?"
Ryan's fingers dig in one last time before he releases me. But instead of leaving, he leans in and whispers, "This isn't over."
Before I can react, Gavin moves with surprising speed for someone his size. One moment, I'm against the wall; the next, I'm upside down, staring at the back of Gavin's shirt, my world literally turned on its head.
"What are you? Put me DOWN!" Blood rushes to my face while I sputter out a protest.
"No can do, little nursing dude," Gavin says, his cheerful tone returning as he starts walking. "Tyler would have my ass if I left you with that Asshole."
Twisting to see Ryan watching us, his face is dark with rage. A chill runs through me at the promise of retribution in his eyes.
"I can walk, you know," I protest, though secretly thankful for both the rescue and the distance Gavin is putting between me and Ryan with every long stride.
"Sure, you can. But this way's faster. And funnier," he says, and though I can't see his face from my upside-down position, I can tell from his tone that he's grinning.
Ten mortifying minutes later, Gavin marches through the front door of the DPO house and into the living room, where several brothers, including Tyler, are playing video games.
Tyler jumps up, controller forgotten. "What the? Is that Ethan?"
Gavin deposits me at Tyler's feet with a theatrical bow. "You saved him on Halloween; he's yours now. Found him being harassed by some douchebag outside the science building."
Scrambling to my feet, my face burning. "Y'all have to stop carrying me around! I'm not a frickin' pillow princess."
Gavin tilts his head. "What's a pillow princess? Is that like the princess and the pea thing?"
My face goes from warm to nuclear as several brothers snicker. "That's not… I didn't… I am NOT explaining that to you or anybody here!" The guys hanging out in the living room burst out laughing.
Tyler's trying not to laugh, but his eyes are concerned as they scan my face, then drop to the redness circling my wrists.
His eyes darken with concern as he notices the redness on my wrists. "Let me get a closer look at that," he says quietly, glancing around at the guys engaged in their noisy video game battle. "Somewhere quieter?"
Nodding, I follow him through the living room where James and a few others are shouting at the screen, controllers clutched in white-knuckled grips. Tyler leads me up the stairs, each step taking us further from the inventive trash talk and into a more private space.
The hallway upstairs is lined with doors, some plastered with posters, others with whiteboards full of inside jokes and reminders. Tyler stops at one with a small whiteboard that reads "VP's Domain - Enter At Your Own Risk" in neat block letters.
"Let me see," Tyler murmurs, gently taking my wrists once we're alone in his room. His fingers are cool against my skin.
"It's nothing," I insist, but don't pull away.
"It's not nothing." His thumb traces the marks Ryan's fingers left. "Did he hurt you anywhere else?"
Shaking my head, I'm fighting the lump in my throat. Why am I getting emotional now? I'm safe. I'm fine.
"Hey," Tyler says softly, tipping my chin up. "You're okay now."
And just like that, I'm not fine at all. A tremor runs through me. "He's never... that was the first time he's ever..."
Tyler pulls me against his chest, and I go willingly, pressing my face into the solid warmth of him. His arms around me feel like a safe place.
"I've got you," he murmurs into my hair. "I've got you."
I don't know how long we stand like that, but gradually, the trembling subsides. When I pull back slightly, our faces are inches apart. His eyes drop to my mouth.
"Can I...?" he asks.
Answering by rising on my toes, pressing my lips to his. What starts as comfort quickly flares into something more hungry. His hands slide under my shirt, warm against my back and lower, making me arch into him.
"Is this okay?" he asks between kisses. "If you need to stop—"
"Don't you dare.” My breath is hot against his mouth.
We stumble towards the bed, still kissing. My hands find the hem of his shirt, tugging it upward. He breaks the kiss long enough to let me pull it over his head. I take a moment to admire his chest, broad, defined, and beautiful.
"Your turn," he says with a smile that's both shy and eager.
Lifting my arms, I help him remove my shirt. His eyes darken as they roam over my torso.
"You're gorgeous," he says, tracing a finger down my sternum.
"Says the literal Greek god," I reply, heat filling my cheeks.
He pulls me close again, skin against skin now, and the sensation makes us both gasp. His hands explore my back, my shoulders, as we kiss deeper, tongues sliding together. When his hips press against mine, I can feel how hard he is through his jeans.
"God, Ethan," he breathes against my neck, his voice rough with need. "You feel amazing."
The way his body responds to my touch, the slight tremors when my fingers trace his spine, the way his breath catches when I kiss that spot below his ear — is intoxicating.
I might be the less experienced one in most of my relationships, but this is different.
Tyler is discovering all of this for the first time, and the wonder in his eyes when he looks at me makes something warm bloom in my chest.
"Is this okay?" he asks between kisses, constantly checking to make sure he's doing the right thing.
"More than okay," I assure him, guiding his hand to my waist. "I like showing you what feels good."
His pupils dilate further at my words, and the flash of vulnerability mixed with desire on his face gives me a rush I wasn't expecting.
There is a surge of confidence. I want to make this good for him, to be the one to show him how incredible this can be.
I break the kiss, moving my lips to his neck, his collarbone. "Can I try something?" I murmur against his skin.
"Anything," he breathes, his hands threaded in my hair.
Sinking to my knees in front of him, I look up to gauge his reaction. His eyes widen, pupils blown with desire.
"You don't have to," he says quickly, though I can see the want written all over his face.
"I know. I want to." I run my hands up his thighs. "Is that okay?"
He nods, speechless.
Maintaining eye contact as I unbutton his jeans, I slowly lower the zipper. His breath hitches audibly when I hook my fingers in the waistband of his jeans and boxers, tugging them down just enough to free him.
He's beautiful here too, thick and hard. I've never considered myself a size queen, but Tyler easily has the largest cock I've ever gotten acquainted with. This is going to be fun. I wrap my hand around him first, stroking lightly, watching his face.
"Tell me if I do something you don't like." Heat floods my cheeks as I lean forward to take him into my mouth
"Oh God," he groans, his head falling back. His fingers tighten in my hair, not pushing, just holding on like he needs an anchor.
Taking my time, I show him all the things I've learned over the years, how to use my tongue, my hand, and my lips together. The sounds he makes are intoxicating, little gasps and moans that tell me I'm doing everything right.
"Ethan," he says after a few minutes, voice strained. "I'm gonna… You should.. " He makes a low, rough grunt that is music to my ears.
Doubling down, I suck him in deeper, and look up to watch his face as he comes undone.
His expression as he reaches that peak is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, pleasure and wonder mixed as he lets out a deep groan.
I swallow, continuing to tease him until he gently tugs me away, oversensitive.
"Holy shit," he pants, looking down at me with glazed eyes. "That was... I don't even have words."
Rising, I feel oddly proud of myself, and he immediately pulls me up into a kiss. He doesn't seem to care that he can taste himself on my tongue; in fact, the way he deepens the kiss suggests he likes it.
Without breaking the kiss, he turns me backward, and now my legs hit the bed. Then, to my surprise, he lifts me like I weigh nothing and deposits me gently on the mattress.
"Your turn," he says, eyes dark with determination.
"Tyler, you don't have to," I'm quick to assure him. "It's your first time with a guy. We can take it slow."
He shakes his head, lowering himself to kneel between my legs. "I want to." His hands go to my belt. "I really, really want to." He looks up at me. "Unless you don't want me to?"
The uncertainty in his voice makes something twist in my chest. "I want you to," I admit. "I just don't want you to feel pressured."
His smile is breathtaking. "The only pressure I feel is how badly I want to make you feel as good as you just made me feel." He undoes my belt, then my button and zipper, no hesitation in his movements, even though this is all new territory for him. "Now, show me how to do this right."
Lifting my hips, I let him pull my jeans and underwear down.
He fights them over my feet, making me laugh at his eagerness.
He tosses them both over his shoulder with a grin.
The cool air on my heated skin makes me shiver, or maybe it's the way he looks at me, like I'm something precious and fascinating.
"What do I...?" he asks, hands hovering uncertainly.
"Start slow," I say, my voice embarrassingly breathy. "Use your hand first. Then your tongue... oh!"
He's a quick study. What he lacks in technique, he makes up for in enthusiasm and attentiveness, watching my reactions and adjusting accordingly. When he takes me into his mouth for the first time, the wet heat of it nearly undoes me on the spot.
"That's perfect," I'm gasping now, fighting the urge to thrust up. "Use your hand too, like… yes, just like that."
It's almost too much, the sight of Tyler Landis, the frat guy I've been fantasizing about, on his knees for me, learning how to please me. When I feel the familiar tightening, I tug at his hair.
"Tyler, I'm close. You need to back… You don't have to—"
Instead of pulling away, he grips my hips and takes me deeper, looking up with determined eyes. The eye contact does it, I come with a shout, my back arching off the bed. He swallows, a bit messily but with obvious enjoyment, continuing until I'm trembling with oversensitivity.
When he finally pulls away, he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, looking immensely pleased with himself.
"Was that okay?" he asks, climbing onto the bed beside me.
Letting out a breathless laugh, I look at his face. "Was that okay? Tyler, that was incredible, especially for your first time."
His smile is so bright it could power the whole campus. "Yeah? I wasn't sure if I was doing it right."
Turning on my side to face him, I trace a finger along his jawline. "Trust me, you were doing it very, very right."
He pulls me closer, and I tuck my head under his chin, our bare chests pressed together. His jeans are still tangled around his thighs, and I still have one sock on, but I've never felt more comfortable.
"You know," I say after a moment, "as rescues go, this one had a pretty spectacular ending."
Tyler laughs, the sound rumbling against my cheek. "Remind me to thank Gavin."
"Please don't tell him any details," I groan. "I'm never explaining to him what a pillow princess is. I'd tell him to Google it, but that can only end badly."
Tyler's hand strokes up and down my spine. "Oh. Gavin should never be encouraged to search for anything sexual online. The last time he didn't know something, he somehow ended up looking at the size differences of different monkey penises, and then he showed us at the breakfast table."
His shudder is hilarious, but I stop laughing when he leans in and licks my ear, whispering with a mischievous tone, "Speaking of pillow princesses. I think there's a lot more you could teach me."
Kissing along his collarbone. "We've got time," I say, surprised by how much I mean it. "We've got all the time in the world."