Chapter 46 #2
Ava came closer. She took his face in both her hands. His eyes were closed, his chest rising and falling. “Cas. Look at me.”
He opened his eyes, wet with the hint of tears, and pressed his forehead to hers. “I can’t lose you,” he rasped. His hands moved to her hips. “I want to be there to protect you.”
“I know. But you trust me, right? That I can handle myself?”
“Of course I trust you, love. My desire to protect you has nothing to do with what I think you’re capable of.
I know you can handle yourself. I just don’t want you to have to.
” He cupped her face. “And knowing you’ll be facing him alone and I can’t be there…
It makes my heart feel like it’s going to explode.
It fights against every instinct within me to keep you safe. ”
Her eyes prickled with tears. This was one of the things she loved most about him. He was fiercely protective without being possessive. Always supported and encouraged her independence. Had always believed in her even when she hadn’t believed in herself.
“I’m scared,” she whispered. “I’m so damned scared…But I know this is the right thing. It’s what I have to do.”
He swallowed, placing a kiss on her nose. “I’m not going to stop you. But I still don’t like it.”
She leaned in and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.
Closing her eyes, she inhaled his scent, reveling in the quiet.
The peace. The calm before the storm. She traced a sliver of skin at the vee of his tunic, moving her finger in soft circles as she let his embrace steady her.
His fingers threaded through her hair as he pressed his lips to the top of her head.
Tilting her head, she placed a subtle kiss on his neck. He shivered. She wanted to be close to him…needed to. To forget about her task; to not think…and just feel. They both needed this.
She traced his face with her fingers, sliding down his jaw, his neck, and gripping his tunic. Leaning in, Casimir’s lips met hers gently, kissing her in a way that spoke without words.
Running her hands further down his chest, she untucked his shirt.
He gripped the back with his fist, and pulled it off in one swift movement, briefly breaking their kiss before he claimed her lips again.
Casimir’s tongue met hers with a desperate moan and she ran her hands down the hard planes of his chest, through the dusting of hair.
Lower she explored, tracing the muscles leading to the V disappearing below his trousers.
She palmed his hard length over his pants. He growled into her mouth.
Ava brushed her lips down his neck, licking and nipping his flesh, worshiping him as he had worshiped her.
Hands roaming, she continued to torment him, her lips trailing down his chest, his abs, until she was on her knees.
She ran her tongue along his abdomen, just above his waistband. His entire body shuddered.
She stared at him from beneath her lashes.
His expression had shifted, his pupils enlarged. Unbuttoning his pants, she allowed them to fall to his feet, his cock springing free. She wrapped a hand around the base, her thumb brushing the underside. Casimir cursed, watching her, his chest heaving.
She pumped him twice, tightening her grasp as she teased the tip with her tongue, tasting the saltiness of him. He groaned. Tilting her head, she ran her tongue along his entire length.
“Ava.” His voice was gravelly.
Swirling her tongue along the head again, she twisted her hand and moved it up and down.
She wanted to make him feel good. Wanted to help him forget what they were both terrified of. What tomorrow could bring. The horrors they would face.
So, tonight she would show him how much he meant to her.
Squeezing the base, she took him in her mouth, allowing him deeper. His hands immediately went to her head, fingers threading through her hair. “Fuck.”
Moving her hands to his thighs, she let him guide her further, let him take control.
His hips began to move, and she hollowed her cheeks as she sucked him, looking up and meeting his feral gaze.
Reaching a hand beneath her own pants, she prepared to touch herself, overcome with desire and the need for release.
“No, princess,” he ordered. She whimpered around him, causing him to moan again. “Don’t touch yourself. Let me be the one to make you come.”
A moan left her lips at his words and he gasped at the vibrations, pushing down her throat farther, his grip tightening in her hair.
Ava let him continue to thrust in her mouth, never breaking eye contact.
He pulled her back with a pop and she gasped, panting as he fisted her hair, looking down at her.
His finger traced her cheek. “So beautiful,” he breathed.
Releasing her, he stepped out of his pants, and stroked himself.
“Stand up and take off your clothes.”
She shivered at the command, rising and tossing her clothing to the side. His eyes took her in, raking over her with hunger as if memorizing every inch. He closed the distance between them and took her chin in between his thumb and forefinger.
“Ava…” he whispered her name like a vow.
And then he kissed her like the world was on fire, plunging his tongue into her mouth.
One hand on the back of her neck, the other moved to her ass, palming it as he pulled her flush against him, his cock hard against her belly.
His lips moved to her jaw, leaving a gentle trail of heat down her neck.
Ava moaned his name, moving a hand to grip his length, resuming her strokes. He pressed his forehead against hers, his breath stuttering as he visibly trembled with restraint. Pupils completely blown, it was obvious he was holding back, the energy between them taut with craving and desire.
But she didn’t want him to keep himself in check. She wanted him to lose control. Wanted the feral need in his eyes to take over. Wanted everything.
“You’re holding back,” she whispered, running her hands along the planes of his stomach, his chest. She placed a kiss on his collarbone. “Don’t hold back. Let go.”
He extended a hand toward the willow tree’s trunk, urging a thick padding of moss to grow. “Are you sure?”
Her hands moved to his hair, pulling him into a kiss. “Please,” she whimpered against his lips.
The next thing she knew, she was lifted to straddle his waist, hands under her thighs, and slammed against the tree.
In one swift thrust, he sheathed himself fully inside.
She cried out, clutching his neck. Yes. Yes.
This was what she needed. A hand dove into her hair, jerking her head to the side to expose her neck.
With a vulgar lick of his tongue up the side of her throat Casimir let out an animalistic groan.
“Oh god.” Her whole body shivered, every inch of her flesh like a live wire.
He started to move. Not gentle and slow, but possessive, consuming. Frantic; driving hard and fast. The way he gripped her thighs as he thrust in and out was almost painful. But she loved it. Needed it. Craved it.
They writhed and moved together as if this might be the last time they ever joined. The last time she felt his skin and his lips against hers, the way he filled her so perfectly. Like they were made for each other.
Casimir groaned into her neck, then bit down on the sensitive curve of her shoulder before kissing and licking the sting away.
He pulled her arms from his neck and pinned them above her head with one hand, his other still gripping her thigh greedily.
She locked her ankles behind him as his pace quickened, slamming her against the tree.
He was so deep, hitting something forbidden inside her with each powerful thrust. The angle had her trembling, just on the edge.
She groaned his name, a low sound in her throat. “Harder,” she barely got out.
“Look at me,” he growled, increasing his relentless pace.
She opened her eyes and met his desperate gaze. A gaze that spoke volumes. Full of want and desire, possession and protectiveness. But also fear, worry. As if he, too, sensed the impending possibilities of tomorrow.
“Ava,” he said, as he rolled his hips, his pelvic bone brushing her clit. Her legs trembled as she gave herself to the command of his body. “You’re everything.” He didn’t break eye contact, still holding her hands above her head as he thrust deep. “You’re my heart.” Another thrust. “And my soul.”
The desperation in his voice caused tears to form in her eyes, a lump in her throat. He slowed, releasing her wrists. “Am I hurting you?”
She shook her head emphatically, gripping his face. “No. I’m just emotional. Don’t stop. Keep going. Please…”
He resumed his pace and kissed her deeply. “I love you,” he whispered against her lips, then kissed down her jaw as they both moved in tandem. “You are my home,” he whispered into her neck. “You’re perfect.”
He pulled back again to look at her, moving faster, harder. Losing himself in the moment. In the connection of their hearts and souls and bodies. “You…are…mine.”
That was all it took for her to shatter as he sent her over the edge, his pace increasing, chasing his own release. He shuddered, she trembled, both shouting the other’s names.
They stilled, panting and clutching each other; not ready to pull apart.
Tears streamed down her face and Casimir leaned in and kissed each cheek.
Pressing his lips to her forehead, he murmured sweet words she didn’t understand in old fae.
But she absorbed them like a prayer, a sob escaping her lips as the realization of what was coming overwhelmed her.
“And you are mine,” she whimpered through her tears.
Back in their bedroom, Ava nestled closer to Casimir as he pulled the blankets over them and held her tight. He’d carried her back to their suite, cleaned her up in the tub, and immediately gotten into bed with her.
She listened to his heartbeat, her head on his chest. His hand moved in slow circles along her hip as he hummed quietly. With a deep breath, she tried to ignore the fear in her gut.
“Cas,” she whispered.
“Hmm?”
“Thank you.”
He tilted her chin to look at him. “For what?”
She swallowed. “For everything. For always protecting me. For caring. For seeing me. For loving me…”
He tensed. “Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?”
She shook her head. “I’m not. I’m just…scared. And I wanted to tell you. Just in case…”
He pulled her closer, kissing her temple and sighing. “My beautiful Mi’ra V?ssa,” he murmured. “It is I who should be thanking you. Don’t even think about saying goodbye, do you understand? Because after this is over, I have plans for us.”
“Plans?”
“Yes, love.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her pointed ear. “Do you remember when you asked me on the horse what my hopes and dreams were after the war?”
“Of course.”
“Well, now I know exactly what I want.”
“And?” She raised a brow, curious now.
He gave her a small smirk. “Survive the war and then you’ll find out.”