Chapter 17 #2
"Oh really?" Her voice sharpens again, that tone I’m used to. "And what about Winnie?"
My gaze narrows, honing in on Sawyer like she's the only thing that exists in this wild night air. She's been watching, really watching me, to pick up on the tangle of whatever me and Winnie got—or ain't got. "What about her?"
"I see the way she looks at you," she says, voice softening again as the rumble of distant thunder starts back up. "She adores you. Head over heels, even. Do you make it clear with her about where you stand?"
I smirk, the kind that knows more than it's tellin', and I lean back again as I look up. "She knows where we stand," I say, simply. "I'm trouble, darlin'. You always know where you stand with me. You always know what you’re getting. I don't sugarcoat for no one."
It’s the truth. Life is too damn fast to be hidin' behind lies. You gotta live it for yourself because once it’s taken, you don’t get it back. There are no second chances. You can’t live it for no one but you.
It’s quiet for a moment, all I hear is the clink of ice against glass as she shifts.
Sawyer's eyes lock onto mine, dark blue and cloudy like the sky right before all hell breaks loose.
She finishes her drink, one smooth tilt of her head back, and sets the glass down.
"Alright then, if you're so honest, tell me how you feel about me.”
For once, I’ve got nothing to say. No smart-ass comment. No sly charm to hide behind.
Just silence. And the pounding truth.
I want to tell her everything. That I’ve been off balance since the first damn second I saw her—when she looked at me like she already knew I’d be trouble.
Even when she’s driving me insane, even when she’s a pain in the ass, she’s still there—taking up my thoughts, making it impossible to focus on anything but her.
But I can’t say that. I won’t.
She’s Knox’s sister. That line? It's thick and bold. Crossing it would screw everything up.
Brotherhood means something out here. In our world—in the dirt and through the pain—we don’t cross that line. You ride for each other. You bleed for each other. And being down bad for your best friend’s little sister?
That’s the kind of betrayal you don’t come back from.
No matter how much you want her.
No matter how bad she already feels like yours.
And yet—that kiss.
God, that fucking kiss.
Her lips. The way she kissed me back like I wasn’t just Trouble—I was hers, too.
It still has my body on fire, like it branded something under my skin I can’t shake. It was reckless. Stupid. I’m one sick bastard for kissing her. I could’ve been caught—by my brothers, by her brother. And still, part of me liked the risk. Needed it.
And now? I’d give damn near anything to feel that again. To press my mouth to hers and make her forget who we are for a minute. To slam her back against that wall behind her right now, pin her hands up, and make her take every ounce of how bad I want her.
But I can’t. I know exactly who we both are.
Being around her, secretly wanting her, feels like balancing on the edge of a cliff with the wind in my face—and damn if I don’t want to fall.
"Trouble?" Her voice pulls me back from my thoughts.
I force out a breath, keeping myself steady like I'm facin' down an angry bull in the ring.
"Sawyer," I start, my tone even, betrayin' none of the turmoil writhin' beneath. "I care about your brother. That’s it. You're Knox's sister, and I’d do anything for him. Which means"—I lock my jaw, holding her gaze—"I'd do anything for you too."
It's the truth, but not the whole of it. Not by a long shot. But if she needs to know where she stands with me, then that's what I can give her.
"So how you feel about me is... that you would do anything for my brother, so I'm just thrown in there too?"
"What do you want me to say, Sawyer?" My voice is gravel, rough-hewn from all the things I'm holdin' back. My gaze never leaves hers, even as I feel this moment between us slipping away.
"I was just trying to see if you'd be honest with me. I’m just Knox’s little sister. Got it." She rises from beside me. The words hang there, suspended in the humid night, before she turns her back on me and strides inside, the screen door slamming shut behind her.
“You walked yourself right into that one,” I mutter, dragging a hand through my hair.
Another flash of lightning slices through the sky, lighting up the porch and the land beyond. And right now, I’m pretty damn sure that was granddaddy, who happens to be the only one who knows what I’m hiding.
“I know, Granddad,” I murmur. “I know.”
Thunder rumbles overhead like a laugh. I can almost see him—shaking his head, half disappointed, half amused. He always said women and trouble usually walked hand in hand. Guess I finally understand what he meant.
My eyes drift back to the door she disappeared behind, and something tight pulls in my chest. I take the last sip of my drink, then set the glass down with a quiet clink on the porch rail.
The truth is, I know better. Wanting her is a mistake I can’t afford. So I do what I’ve always done—bite down that feeling, and let her walk away like I haven’t already crossed the line in my head a hundred times.