Chapter 18 Joelle
JOELLE
We're barely out of Emmett's apartment when Collette rounds on me.
"Okay, what the hell was that?"
"What was what?" I say as I walk faster toward our door, my heart still racing, my body still humming from Emmett's expert fingers.
"That." She gestures back toward Emmett's place. "The weird tension. The fact that you're wearing his hoodie."
"I told you. I got locked out with no bra on. He was being a gentleman."
She unlocks our door and holds it open for me, her eyes narrowing on me. "What did you do while you waited for me?"
I step inside and reluctantly pull off the hoodie and try not to think about how it smells like him. "We were watching hockey highlights. And he was telling me about the team. What injuries they have. What bothers them that they might not feel comfortable telling me tomorrow."
"Uh-huh." She closes the door behind us. "And that's why you look like you just ran a marathon when I arrived."
I set the hoodie on the counter, my lips feel swollen. Raw. "I'm jet lagged."
"Nice try." She moves to the couch and sits down, crossing her arms. "I've known you your entire life. Don't bullshit me."
My throat tightens as I stay standing. I can't sit, I have too much nervous energy coursing through me. "I'm not."
"Your hair is a mess. Your lips are swollen. And you're acting weird as hell."
My hand flies to my hair automatically, trying to smooth it again.
"Something happened between you and Emmett. Now I'm not here to judge you. Emmett is a good-looking guy, but ..."
"It's nothing."
"Jo." Her voice softens. "Did something happen with Emmett?"
"Nooooo ..." I say the word slowly as tears begin to well in my eyes.
Collette's brows pull together, she sees me having the start of a breakdown and stands. She walks over and pulls me into a hug, which surprises me. "Your secrets are safe with me." I force myself to look at her. My sister. My best friend. "Jo, if he did something to you ..."
I gasp. "No. No, he didn't. He wouldn't." My voice breaks completely. "I swear. He didn't do anything I didn't want."
Her eyes widen. Now it's her turn to gasp. "Oh my god."
"What?"
"You did hook up with him. You sneaky bitch. He didn't do anything I didn't want." She mimics me.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I sink onto the couch and drop my head into my hands. I can't keep this secret from her anymore, I'm going crazy.
"Jo?" She sits beside me, her hand on my back. "Talk to me."
"I can't," I mumble into my hands.
"Why not?"
"Because if I say it out loud, it's real. And if it's real, then I have to deal with it."
She rubs slow circles on my back. "What happened?" she asks softly.
"Like what happened today or ..."
"Or?" she asks. "Did something happen last night?" I shake my head. "I'm so confused, Jo. Please, just spit it out."
"I kissed him."
"You kissed him today?" I nod, I can still feel his mouth on mine and his hands in my hair. My skin lights up just thinking about the way he handled me earlier. The orgasm he gave me. If Collette hadn't knocked on the door, I would have slept with him. And I'm kind of disappointed that she did.
"Okay." She squeezes my shoulder. "It's okay."
"It's not okay. He's the captain, Lettie. My brothers' teammate. I start work tomorrow and I just ..." My voice breaks. The tears come. Hot. Fast. "I'm so screwed."
"Come here." She pulls me into a hug.
Months of wanting him. Months of thinking about London. The shock of seeing him last night. And now this. "I don't know what to do," I sob into her shoulder. "I don't know how to work with him after this."
"Shh. It's okay. We'll figure it out."
"Pierre and Felix will kill him if they find out. They'll kill me. And my career will be over before it starts because everyone will think I only got the job because I'm fucking the captain."
"You're not fucking the captain."
"Not today I didn't. But I have."
My sister stills. "I'm going to need you to back up for a moment. Have you met Emmett before?"
I look up at her through tear-soaked eyes. "Yes."
Her eyes widen. "I thought you were being dramatic but ... how? When?"
I suck in a deep breath and let it out. "He is the guy I hooked up with in London."
My sister squeals. "No way. No fricken way. What are the chances? Did you know in London who he was?"
I shake my head. "First time was last night."
"No." She gasps. "No wonder you were acting weird last night."
"I couldn't tell anyone."
"No shit." She chuckles. I glare at her. "Sorry. But I get it now." Then those eyes widen again. "So, I really did interrupt something earlier." I nod. "You dirty bitch."
"It wasn't like that. It was ..."
"The sexual tension got too much, and you just had to rip each other's clothes off."
I burst out laughing. "Yeah."
"I don't think I've ever been prouder of you in this moment." She squeezes me.
"Proud?"
"Yes. You've always been so perfect. The fact that you have got yourself into something this crazy makes me happy." I stare at my sister like she's lost her marbles. "Not in a mean way. More like you're human."
"This isn't really helping me."
"I love you. And go you. Emmett is a hottie." I shake my head at her. "Was he good?" My eyes narrow. "Ooh, he's big, isn't he? You can tell by the hands."
"Lettie!"
"I get it, sis. Sometimes the D is too good. You're prepared to risk it all for it."
"I don't want to risk anything. This job means everything to me." Panic grips my body.
She waves my panic attack away as if it's nothing. "I've got you, babe. If you two want to keep hooking up, then we are going to have to talk strategy."
"I'm not hooking up with him ever again."
"Why not?" she asks, confused.
"Because it's against team policy," I remind her.
"Yeah, yeah, that," she answers, unbothered by that bit of information.
"Yeah, yeah, that. It's a big that!"
"If you get caught. The fun is in the sneaking around." She smirks.
"Do not tell me you have been sneaking around?"
"What? No. Promise. I'd tell you if I was but ..."
"There can be no but."
"Well, I mean, if you're going down then you shouldn't be alone."
"What are you talking about?"
"If you blow up your career for Emmett, then count me in on hooking up with a player, too, and blowing up mine. That way you won't be alone," Collette explains.
"You're not serious."
She looks offended. "Of course, I am. You're family."
I stare at her. "You're insane."
"Maybe. But you love me. I'm not letting you go down alone." She is crazy. And it's true, I do love her.
"There's no going down because nothing else is happening. Today was a mistake. A one-time thing to get it out of our systems."
"And did it work?" She smirks.
I think about how badly I still want him. How my body is still aching. How even now, I want to march back to his apartment and finish what we started. "No." I sound defeated.
"See? You need to hit it again."
"Lettie!"
"What? I'm being practical. Clearly, one time wasn't enough to get out of each other's systems. Maybe two times will do it. Or three. Or ..."
"Stop." I grab her hand, looking at her seriously. "I need you to help me stay away from him."
Her smile fades. "Jo ..."
"Please. I'm serious. If you see me going near him. If you see us alone together. Stop me. Physically drag me away if you have to. I can't be trusted around him."
She studies my face and can see how desperate I am. "You really think you can't control yourself?"
"I know I can't. I literally launched myself at him today, Lettie. Like a horny teenager. I have zero self-control when it comes to him."
She sighs. "Okay. I'll help. But, Jo, this is going to be really hard. You work with him every day."
"I know. That's why I need you, especially on the road. You need to be my roomie."
"Fine. That would be fun. What about when you're at work and I'm not there?"
"I'll ... I don't know. Avoid him. Stay busy. Pretend he doesn't exist."
"That's a terrible plan."
"It's the only plan I have."
"How long do you think it's going to take for you to get over him?" she asks.
"I don't know. But I'm sure he will be distracted by puck bunnies on the road. He will forget about me easily."
"Emmett isn't a puck bunny kind of guy," she informs me.
"Well, I'm sure he will meet someone. Or I will. Maybe I'll join the dating apps. Distract myself on dates."
Lettie doesn't look convinced. "You hate the dating apps."
"I know. But I'm trying here."
"Fine." She sighs, pulling me into another hug. "I've got you. We'll figure this out together."
"Thank you."
"But for the record, I still think you should hit it one more time."
"Lettie!"
"Just saying."