25. The hard truth.
Chapter 25
The hard truth.
Amelia
A sharp rap against the front door drags me from my thoughts, but I ignore it, burying my face in the pillow. Nova’s home. It’s probably for her anyway.
“Can you get that?” She calls from the kitchen, the clatter of pots and pans a jarring counterpoint to the silence in my head.
I push myself to a sitting position, the effort draining me. But I don’t move. The thought of human interaction is a terrifying prospect. Conversation is the last thing I need right now, the last thing I can bear.
Instead, I crumple back onto the bed, curling into a fetal position, a desperate attempt to shield myself from the outside world.
The knocking intensifies, a pounding now, a relentless assault on my fragile peace. I tighten my grip, my breath catching in my throat, silently pleading for the visitor to go away, to leave me alone in my misery.
“Lia!” Nova’s voice booms through the house, the sound of her heavy footsteps echoing throughout. She’s not happy, I can tell.
Let her join the party. Unhappiness seems to be the theme song of my life lately.
I’m still furious with Christian. How could he do this to me? To us?
“I thought I meant more to him than that,” I whisper, the words tasting like ashes in my mouth. It’s been days, and the silence between us is deafening. He hasn’t made an effort, not really. Granted, I asked for space, but I didn’t expect him to vanish. I need him to fight for me, to prove to me that I’m worth the effort.
I roll onto my back, staring at the swirling patterns on the ceiling, this pain amplifying my despair.
“God, I’m so stupid,” I groan, the words catching in my throat. Here I am, lamenting his absence, when I was the one who pushed him away.
You can’t have it both ways, Lia. You can’t demand his attention while simultaneously demanding space.
Maybe it’s time to stop playing these childish games. Maybe I should tell him exactly what I need, to stop hoping he’ll magically figure it out. Men aren’t exactly renowned for their mind-reading abilities, and Christian is no exception.
But the fear is paralyzing.
He’s shown me he cares, in his own endearing way, but his words have always been scarce. I need to hear him say it, to feel the full weight of his love, to know that we’re truly in this together.
“Are you ever going to tell me what happened?” The sound of Nova’s voice startles me and I jump up.
I press my hand to my chest and take a deep breath. “God, Nova. You scared me.”
She shrugs. “Didn’t mean to.”
“Who was at the door?” I ask, hoping my startled state hides the fact that I’m hopeful Christian came to see me.
“Just a package being delivered.” She watches me closely as I attempt to hide my disappointment behind another deep breath. If she sees my true feelings, she doesn’t say anything. Instead, she points at my arm. “That bruise looks worse today. Tell me what really happened.”
I pull my arm to my chest and cover the bruise with my hand. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Nova pushes off the door frame and joins me on the bed. “I don’t care. Your silence only draws more questions and concerns. Not to mention the rumors.”
“What rumors?” I ask, my voice a little too sharp, a little too defensive. I’ve been a recluse since … well, since it happened. The only people I’ve spoken to are my closest friends, Mom, and Darlene. This is the first time I’ve heard of rumors.
“The word around town is that Christian did that to you after you got pissed at him over the poker game.”
My jaw drops. “Christian didn’t do this to me.”
“I know,” Nova says, matter-of-factly. “That man would never hurt you. He thinks he will, but he won’t. What I need to know is who actually did that to you.”
“I said I don’t want to talk about it.”
Nova gives me a hard stare. It’s the kind of look that makes me want to shrink back into the shadows, the kind a parent reserves for when a child has disappointed them. “Rumor also has it that Badger was the only other person outside when you were hurt. So if Christian didn’t do this to you, then it had to be Badger. What do you say to that?”
My heart hammers against my ribs, a frantic drumbeat echoing in my ears. My eyes widen, the world suddenly distorted, the edges blurring as fear washes over me.
Jumping to my feet, I turn my back to her. “You overthink things too much, you know that?”
“I worry about my friends. If the roles were reversed, you’d be asking me the same questions.”
I close my eyes, the world fading away as I try to regulate my breathing. Fear, cold and clammy, grips me, twisting my insides into knots.
This conversation is tearing at my insides, exposing the fragile pieces of my shattered confidence. I’ve kept this a secret for far too long. I know I need to talk, to be honest with Nova—and my family—but the fear of them not believing me is paralyzing.
Yet, I know Nova won’t let me down. She and Hadley will stand by my side, holding me up as I face the truth head-on. That’s the kind of friends they are—fierce, loyal, and brutally honest.
“You’re right.” I turn to face her and force myself to meet her concerned gaze.
“Then tell me what happened.” She insists.
My hands fly to my face, burying it in my palms, a desperate attempt to block out the world. This conversation has been a ghost haunting me for over two years, a specter I’ve successfully evaded until now.
Foolishly, I believed I could bury the truth, that I could somehow escape its inevitable reckoning, despite the constant presence of Badger in my life. But circumstances have conspired against me, forcing me to confront the past, to finally speak the words I’ve so desperately tried to silence.
I can’t let Christian carry this burden any longer. I can’t let him be forever branded the villain in my life. He deserves to be seen as the hero that he truly is to me.
I take a deep breath and look at my friend. “Okay, but I only want to tell this story once. Can you call Hadley and have her meet us at my parents’ house?”
“Lia, stop avoiding this,” Nova says in frustration.
“I’m not!” I yell. “This isn’t easy for me. If I have to talk about it, I’m only going to do it once. I never want to speak these words again.”
“Okay, now you’re scaring me.” Nova furrows her brows.
I walk over to where she’s still sitting on the bed and take her hand. Pulling her to her feet, I hug her tight. “I’ll explain once we’re at my parents’ house. I promise. Call Hadley. Please.”
“Okay.” She hugs me back and holds me tight for several seconds before she finally releases me. “Why do I get the feeling I’m going to want to murder someone when this is all said and done?”
I chuckle because that is a very Nova-like response. “Because you will.”
“Great,” she draws out the word like it’s going to be a chore she doesn’t really want to do but knows she has to. “I’ll go call Hadley.”
I grab my phone off the nightstand and pull up the conversation with my mom.
Amelia
Hey, I need to talk to the entire family. Are my brothers there?
Mom
Linden, Tanner, and Jason are here. I think Aaron is at home. Is everything okay?
Amelia
It will be. Can you call Aaron and ask him to come over? This is really important.
Mom
Okay. When will you be here?
Amelia
Nova and I are heading over now.
I stuff my phone in my back pocket and head out to the living room to find Nova. She’s in the kitchen, cleaning up the dinner we never ate.
“Oh, shit. I’m sorry,” I say.
She shrugs. “Don’t worry about it. It’ll save for later. Something tells me this conversation trumps pork chops and mac’n cheese.”
As Nova pulls up to my parents’ house, my stomach churns, a sickening knot of anxiety tightening in my chest. My hands tremble, slick with a cold sweat as I wipe them off on my pants.
I’ve never felt this raw, this exposed, not even when I discovered I was pregnant with Christian’s child.
This … this is different. This is terrifying.
“You okay?” Nova asks as she puts her car into park.
“No, not really,” I say, honestly.
“That might be the most truthful thing you’ve said in ages.” I look over at my friend and she gives me a gentle smile. Then she takes my hand and squeezes. “Whatever it is, we’re here for you. No one will ever hurt you again.”
Tears well up in my eyes, and I quickly squeeze them shut. I’ve dreaded this conversation ever since that horrible night happened. Foolishly, I tried to convince myself that I could ignore this forever, despite knowing that wasn’t the case.
Headlights shine through the back window of Nova’s car and we both turn around.
“Must be Hadley since Aaron’s car is already here,” Nova says.
“Yeah,” I manage, my voice trembling slightly. I grip the door handle, my knuckles white, and swing the door open. “Let’s get this over with before I chicken out completely.”
We wait for Hadley, the silence between us thick with unspoken anxieties. As soon as she steps out of her car, she rushes towards me, engulfing me in a warm, comforting hug. “Are you okay? Whatever it is, we’re here for you. We’ll figure this out together.”
A genuine smile finally breaks through the tension. “I know,” I say, squeezing her back tightly. “Now let go, before my family comes outside and we get stuck in the driveway forever. I need to sit down.”
I take a deep breath, forcing myself to stand tall, to project an image of strength I’m far from feeling. It feels like I’m walking on broken glass, every movement a painful reminder of the impending conversation.
Suddenly, a wave of longing washes over me. I wish Christian was here. He knows this pain, this fear, better than anyone. He’s been my rock through the darkest of times, his support an unwavering anchor. But I need to face this alone. It’s best if my family hears it from me first.
The front door opens before we reach the porch steps. Linden is standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. “Finally going to tell us what’s going on?”
The tone in his voice causes me to cringe. My brother means well, but he can be a little harsh in his delivery. It makes me want to run back to the car and forget this whole thing.
“Don’t be an ass.” Nova scolds him. “It wasn’t easy for her to come over here.”
Linden has the decency to look remorseful, and it puts me a little more at ease. He shocks me even more when he says, “Sorry, I’m just worried.”
I nod and take a step past him, but he stops me.
“I went to see your boyfriend,” he says.
Shocked again, I look up and meet his worried gaze. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah,” he nods. “Asked him about what happened. He refused to talk to me. Said I had to ask you.”
“Well, get inside and I’ll tell you what you need to know,” I say. My insides feel like they’re trying to fight their way to the outside. My stomach is a wreck, and my heart won’t stop pounding like an overzealous hammer.
The sight of my family, all gathered in the living room, waiting for me, hits me like a physical blow. My vision swims, the edges blurring into an indistinct haze. My knees buckle, the strength draining from my limbs. I sink to the floor, the world tilting precariously on its axis.
“Easy now.” Linden’s arms wrap around me, and he catches me before I hit the ground.
Panic surges through me, a tidal wave of fear threatening to drown me. My mother’s cries pierce the air, her voice raw with worry. Several feet scramble towards me, their figures blurred by the panic-induced haze. Linden’s strong arms wrap around me, lifting me effortlessly, carrying me to the couch.
I’m aware of the commotion around me, the concerned voices, the frantic touch of hands on my body, but I can’t speak. My mouth is frozen, my throat constricted. I want to tell them I’m okay, to reassure them, but no words escape my lips.
“Is it the baby?” I hear my mom ask. She sounds genuinely worried. I shake my head, hoping she can see the motion.
“It has something to do with these,” Nova says as she reaches for my arm and shoves up the sleeve of my sweater. A collective gasp fills the room.
“It’s … it’s fine.” I manage. I struggle to sit up. My head is dizzy, and my eyes still won’t focus.
“Don’t,” Aaron says. “Rest a minute before you get up.”
I shake my head. “I said I’m fine.”
I blink several times until the room comes into focus. The first pair of eyes I meet are those of my dad. He’s filled with rage, and I’m acutely aware of my exposed bruises. I quickly pull my sleeve back down and cover the evidence of Badger’s attack.
“Christian Mutter is a dead man,” Dad says with so much anger and truth behind each word. He means it. If I don’t convince him this wasn’t Christian’s doing, things are going to get a lot worse.
“Christian didn’t do this,” Linden says. Every pair of eyes in the room snaps to him in surprise. Even mine.
“What are you talking about?” Dad asks.
“I spoke to Christian the day after the poker game. He didn’t do this.”
“And you believed him?” Dad yells. “He’s a Mutter. They’re liars.”
“Trust me, Dad.” The sober expression on Linden’s face causes all the fight in Dad to diminish. “I’m uncertain who did this to her, but I know it wasn’t Christian. He’s protecting her.”
My eyes lock with Linden’s, a silent conversation passing between us. He knows. Maybe not the specifics, the ugly, messy details, but he sees it—the truth. That alone is almost enough to make me crumble. He’s questioning everything, every assumption he’s ever made about his best friend.
“Then who did this to my daughter?” Dad yells.
I close my eyes and gather up every ounce of strength inside me before I let the truth out.
“Badger.” The name escapes my lips, a mere breath, but it’s enough to shatter the silence, all eyes turning toward me, a collective gasp escaping their lips.
Linden’s knees buckle beneath him, his body crumpling to the floor. He looks utterly defeated, his face a mask of pain, a vulnerability I’ve never witnessed before. This is going to hurt them all, I know it. The fallout from this revelation will leave scars that may never heal.
“I’m going to need more context,” Linden says as tears prick the corner of his eyes. He fights it back, but there’s no denying the sadness that overwhelms him.
Watching Linden crumble before me is agonizing. My brother, the invincible, the one who always wore his emotions like armor, is broken, his facade shattered. I’ve never seen him like this—this raw and vulnerable—and the sight of his pain tears at my heart. I fear my truth may destroy him.
Tears stream down my face, blurring the already chaotic scene. I take a shaky breath, the sobs threatening to consume me. I have to say it, to release this burden that has been crushing me for years. I need to tell the truth, and then I can lock it away again, bury it deep within the recesses of my mind, where it can no longer hurt anyone.
“It was late.” My voice is shaky, but I push through. “It was karaoke night at the bar. Nova and Hadley had already left. I hung around a while longer with Clara and a few of the teachers at the school. I hardly ever do that, but we were having so much fun singing.”
“How long ago was this?” Nova asks. “I don’t remember.”
“Two years, three months, and three days,” I say without hesitation. I close my eyes because I hate that I recall the exact number of days since Badger assaulted me.
“Jesus fucking Christ.” Linden rubs his hands over his face before he looks at me again. “What the hell did he do to you?”
I reach out and take Linden’s hand. I squeeze it as much for him as I do for myself. Getting this story out will not be easy. “They had just announced last-call. I didn’t realize how late it had gotten, so I said my goodbyes and headed out.”
I drop my head and take a deep breath. “He was waiting by my car.”
“Badger?” Linden whispers.
I nod, unable to hold back my tears as I’m forced to relive that terrifying night. “At first, I thought nothing of it. I’ve known Badger all my life, and he had never hurt me. Annoyed me? Yes. But not hurt me. As I got closer, I felt uneasy, almost threatened. There was a look in his eyes that I had never noticed before. Wild and dangerous.”
Tears stream down my face, blurring the room around me. The memories, long buried, rise to the surface, each one a searing, agonizing reminder of the pain he inflicted. I’ve spent so long building walls around these memories, burying them deep. Exposing the raw wounds, and the pain is almost unbearable. But it’s necessary. This is the only way to make them understand.
“He was leaning against the driver’s side door with this disgusting smirk on his face. When I asked him to move, he said no. He said he was tired of waiting for me and that he was taking what was his. I tried laughing it off, treating it like it was some sort of joke, but that only made him angrier. He charged me. Pushed me to the ground and ripped my clothes.”
My throat tightens, and my tears stream down my face. Reliving this is too much, and I fall apart. My shoulders shake and my sob breaks free.
Linden lunges forward and wraps me in a safe embrace. “Fuck, Lia. Did he … you know?”
He doesn’t want to say the words, and I can’t say I blame him. That night could have gone differently if Christian hadn’t showed up.
I shake my head. “I screamed. So loud. Christian was heading toward his bike and he heard me. Badger violated me in other ways, but Christian stopped him before he—”
Even I can’t say the word out loud. I was so close to being raped that night. One more minute—one more breath—it might have been too late. That thought alone is enough to cause me to spiral.
Linden lets me go and steps back. “He’s a dead man.”
My gaze meets my dad’s, and the sight of his grief shatters me. Tears stream down his face, each one a silent apology. My mother’s sobs are muffled, but the raw pain in her voice is undeniable. My brothers pace like caged animals, their faces a terrifying mixture of anger and horror.
My friends wrap their arms around me, a warm, protective cocoon against the storm of emotions threatening to consume us all.
“Fuck!” Tanner shoves his hands into his hair. “And to think we’ve been pushing you to marry him.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Dad asks as he falls to his knees before me.
“I was scared, and I didn’t think you’d believe me.” I cry. “You love Badger like he’s family.”
Dad takes my hand and pulls me into a tight hug. “You’re my daughter. I’ll always believe you.”
I look up at my dad and cup his cheek, doubt threatening to take over. “Then believe me when I tell you Christian is a good man. He saved me from a horrible fate, and he’s kept me safe from Badger ever since.”
The silence is a ticking bomb as my family processes what I’ve told them.
“Now we’ll keep you safe too,” Linden says. “And when I’m done with Badger, he’ll never be able to touch another woman again.”
“No, don’t!” I call out, but it’s too late. My brothers have already rushed out the front door.
“Oh, dear.” Mom presses her hand to her chest and grabs her phone. “We have to stop them.”
I fall back on the couch and let my friends surround me in safety. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
The last thing I want is for my brothers to pay for Badger’s horrible decisions. If they get their hands on him, he’ll never live to see another day.