Chapter 14
EMBERLYNN
I’d gone shopping while Hardison was in his sessions today. He was distant, and I feared he’d changed his mind about us. I hoped he hadn’t, since it was the opposite of what I wanted.
I went to the spiritual and holistic store nearby.
Inside, I talked to the healer, who suggested calming stones, burning sage, and infused crystals to offer protective energy.
I didn’t expect her to have jewelry, but she suggested a jade and celestite bracelet.
When she brought it to me, it felt right, and I could imagine it on Hardison’s wrist.
“I have matching earrings,” Josephine, the healer, said before disappearing into the back.
I’d already spent more than my budget, but because Hardison hadn’t allowed me to pay for anything, I still had money in the bank I was supposed to use while I was here. Depending on how much the earrings were, maybe I could afford them.
“Try these,” she instructed as she approached.
“I—” I stopped when I saw how beautiful they were.
I took off my silver hoops and put on the earrings she’d shown me. When I had them on, she put on a smaller bracelet that matched.
“One hundred sixteen dollars and twenty-three cents.” She smiled up at me.
There was no way all this stuff was just a hundred bucks.
“Was there a sale?” I asked as I removed everything in case she needed to ring them up.
“No. I was inspired by the story you were telling me. I really hope that your boyfriend finds peace. Plus, I’m a sucker for a man in a military uniform.
The fact that he was injured on duty and suffers because of his dedication, is more than honorable.
I’m thanking you for his service. You’re sacrificing, too.
You’re helping him through combat PTSD and healing him with your love.
I’m grateful to you, and I know he is too. ”
She wrapped everything up, including some tea to help him with his anxiety. I noticed there were more boxes than I’d asked for and a few other packages I didn’t remember picking out. It was too much.
“Josephine, I can’t take all this.” I wiped a tear that broke free.
“As women, who are we if we don’t lift one another up?
By helping you, I help him. And I want you both to heal.
I know you’ve got your own trauma, and you should know that the past should stay there.
Your ex doesn’t deserve your daily gifts of being part of your present.
” She swiped the card I’d pulled out. “Tomorrow is Christmas, and you’ve got everything you need.
You feel it, and so does he. Don’t let the trauma keep you from getting what you both deserve.
Emberlynn, be brave. Own what’s already yours, sweetheart. ”
I hugged her, and she rubbed my back. “Merry Christmas, honey.”
“Thank you.” I wiped my eyes and tried to make myself decent before I walked out. “Really, thank you so much for everything. Merry Christmas.”
“You’re very welcome.”
When I walked out, I felt the crisp wind on my face, offering me a strength I lacked when I first arrived. Hardison was worth the leap. He was just afraid. Hell, so was I.
My phone rang, and Tia’s face was on the screen. I answered the call smiling. “Hey, best friend.”
“Merry Christmas, friend!” She smiled big. “Guess what?”
“What?” Because there was no way that I’d know.
“I’m here.” She smiled.
“Wait, what?” I squinted at her background, recognizing the ranch in her background.
“When we talked, you seemed sad, so I came to raise your spirits.”
“I don’t know if he’d mind…” Torn between wanting to see my best friend and not knowing if Hardison could handle it, I didn’t know what to do.
“I found an empty apartment on a rental site that isn’t far. There’s a woman who is renting out the second room in her unit.”
“Oh gosh, I can’t believe you came all this way!” I sniffed.
“For you? You know I’d go anywhere. Let’s do dinner, okay? Since you’re not here, I’m going to go get settled. Whew, there are some desirable men walking around here. Who is that guy?” She reversed the camera, and I saw Elijah approaching her.
I chuckled. “That’s the owner, Elijah, and he is very much taken.”
“Wew, chile, he’s fine.”
I could hear Elijah speaking, and I told her to show him the screen. She did, and he went from scowling to smiling at me.
“Know her?” He asked.
“She’s my best friend. She’s surprising me with a visit. I’m still running errands, so I’ll miss her. She’s friendly, I promise. If someone could give her a ride to the place she’s staying, I’d appreciate it.” I pleaded with him.
“I’ll have Callum take her. Don’t worry, we’ll get her squared away.” Elijah nodded to me before moving out of the frame.
“So, dinner?” She said while fanning her face.
“Yes,” I giggled.
“Bring Hardison, too.” She ended the call, and I squealed.
If there was something I wasn’t seeing when it came to Hardison and me, Tia would.
Though I wasn’t sure there was anything to find.
Even the distance was perfect. He was taking time for himself, and I appreciated that he was hard on himself because he didn’t like what he’d done.
He was trying to protect us both, and I respected the effort, but he was also running.
I was tired of the unnecessary space, and it was time for my king to return to me.
I talked Hardison into going out instead of spending the evening cooking. It resulted in more time with two people that I adored. That was what I wanted more than anything else.
Hardison witnessed me acting a fool as Tia, and I hugged each other like it’d been centuries since we’d seen each other.
Then, he drove us to dinner, where he got to see how close we were by the constant chatter and similar tastes.
She turned to him and drilled him like a sergeant when we were all caught up.
He kept up, said all the right things, and even joked with her. The next thing I knew, the three of us were having a conversation filled with laughter and fun, as if getting together like this was something we did often.
Tia excused herself to the bathroom, and I went with her. When she came out of the stall, she washed her hands and cornered me.
“Emberlynn, I must say that not only does he look better in person, but I can tell that he cares about you. Are you ready for that?”
I nodded, positive about how I felt about him. “I am.”
“I can’t find anything wrong with him.”
“Well…” I went into the story about what happened between us.
Tia nodded in all the right places, and when I was done, I was sure she would change her mind about him.
“You’re only confirming what I thought. He’d rather hurt himself than hurt you.
I still stand by what I said. Friend, I like him, too.
You deserve to be happy. I think you should go for it.
And by the way, good job on the makeup coverup.
” She joked. “Promise that he’s not beating you?
” She gave me her serious face, and I stood tall when I responded.
“He’s not, I promise.” I nodded, feeling the same way. “I think I should go for it as well.”
We returned to the table for dessert, but I couldn’t wait until Christmas morning. That was what I was eager for.
“What the fuck?” Hardison tried to jump out of his bed, but I held on to him.
I’d snuck into bed with him when I was sure he was asleep.
“Good morning, King.”
He relaxed into my arms for a moment, then turned on the lights on his side of the bed. He checked me over like a mother would her child after she expected harm to come their way.
“I’m fine, Hardison. I promise.” I leaned up and kissed his face and then his lips.
“We can’t chance this.” He motioned between us. “I thought I could end things, but I can’t. However, if we’re in different beds, I think it’ll work.”
I chuckled. “We’re not doing that. Hardison, that was an accident. You didn’t mean it, and I won’t punish either of us by keeping away from you. Do you remember what I wanted for Christmas?”
He nodded. “I do. I’m right here.”
“But I don’t want a tarnished version of you. One that you’ve decided was bad for me. The simple fact that you’re trying to protect me from you is beyond noble. Baby, I want you–scars and all. I love you.”
He moved back as if I’d struck him. Had I said too much?
“I love you, too,” he whispered. “Merry Christmas, Queen.”
I rolled on top of him and kissed his full lips. “Merry Christmas.”
Then I spent all morning making sure he felt how good we were together.
Emberlynn’s head rested on my chest, tickling my skin as the rise and fall of her breathing slowed.
My arm was wrapped around her, my hand resting low on her hip, keeping her close.
The room was quiet, lit only by the dim glow of the lamp, but her voice broke through the stillness.
Thick with sleep as she’d just awakened.
“What do you dream about? Those nightmares that either keep you awake or that you tussle with when your eyes are closed.” She asked softly, her words feather-light, like she wasn’t sure if I’d answer.
I stared up at the ceiling for a long moment, my throat thick. Most nights, I buried the truth. Changed the subject. Smiled, kissed, distracted. But tonight, with her heartbeat pressed against me, there wasn’t anywhere to hide.
“I dream about Barrett,” I said finally, my voice rougher than I intended.
Her head lifted slightly, just enough for her eyes to meet mine. She didn’t interrupt, just waited.
“We were on a mission overseas. Classified. We’d gone dark for days, working to get a sergeant out—Raya’s mother.
” I paused, the memory clawing at me, still sharp, still raw.
“She’d been trapped over there for years, buried under layers of intel, forgotten by the very people who sent her.
We found her, and it was my job to bring her home.
Get her away from the people who held her hostage. ”