Do As I Say
Aviana
I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart pounding, the nightmare still echoing in my mind. Why can’t I escape it? Why here? Why now? I thought I was supposed to be healing, but it feels like I’m still trapped in the same place, forced to relive every painful detail I worked so hard to forget.
“You okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Scarlet says, stepping out of the bathroom, her voice full of concern.
I try to breathe, forcing myself to sound casual. “Yeah, just another bad dream.”
Her eyes linger on me, sensing the lie. “Should I call Cade? He always seems available when you reach out. I think he’s got a thing for you.”
Her words hit me like a jolt, and I instinctively recoil, unwilling to dwell on the thought. “No, I’m fine. I have a session with him this morning, but I think I’ll see him after yoga instead. Then there’s a group nature hike with Dr. Carter. And honestly… he’s my therapist. He wouldn’t cross that line.”
She smirks, not entirely convinced. “Seriously? You believe that policy stuff? What about when we leave here? He won’t be your therapist anymore. Who knows, you two might end up—”
“Yeah, that’s not happening,” I cut her off, my voice a little too harsh.
Frustrated, I push myself out of bed, trying to shake off the tension that’s crept into my chest. I turn toward her, the words snapping out of me. “I’ve got to get ready. I’ll see you later.”
I don’t wait for a response. I need to escape.
** *
“And inhale slowly,” Dr. Flores announces into the microphone, guiding his yoga class.
“And exhale. There you go. Breathe. Clear your minds. And inhale.”
Clear my mind? Yeah, that’s the one thing I can’t do right now. All I can think about is what Scarlet said this morning.
“Aviana, are you still with us?” Dr. Flores’ voice cuts through my swirling thoughts.
“Yes, sir. Sorry. I guess my mind just wasn’t clearing,” I mumble, hearing giggles from the back of the class. I glance over my shoulder and see Madison and Scarlet whispering to each other. I didn’t realize they were here.
Turning back to Dr. Flores, I gesture for him to continue.
“Yoga is about creating space,” he says. “Space between your muscles and fibers, space between your doubts and beliefs, space between your ears, so you can focus inward and find peace.” He pauses. “Let’s create that space by clearing our minds.”
The hum of the air conditioner fills the room as everyone falls quiet.
“You may feel a little off-balance as your mind clears and the noise dies down. Notice that sensation, lean into it, don’t fight it. Meet it with kindness.”
I’m just about there—just about clear—when a sharp voice slices through the calm.
“Aviana! Can I see you in my office, please?” Cade asks, his tone leaving no room for argument.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Brenner, but this is my class right now. Is it something that can wait?” Dr. Flores responds, his voice cool and calm.
“Unfortunately, no. She’s already missed two sessions with me and I need to see her immediately.”
A few more giggles from the back of the room. As I gather my things, I hear Scarlet cooing, “Aviana and Cade sitting in a tree…”
“What are you, four?” I snap, frustrated. “Could you be any more childish?”
“Aviana, now!” Cade’s voice grows more stern.
“Coming, Dr. Brenner,” I reply, the giggles growing louder.
“Knock it off,” Dr. Flores says, sounding genuinely annoyed for once. He turns back to the class, picking up where he left off as Cade heads out of the gym.
I don’t know what to say or do, so I just follow him in silence
***
“Good afternoon, Cynthia,” Cade greets the receptionist as we walk in.
“Good afternoon, Dr. Brenner. Aviana, nice to see you again. How are you doing?”
“Not now, Cynthia. We have things to take care of. Can you hold all my calls and cancel my next two appointments, please?”
She nods and starts typing quickly. “Sure thing.”
“Aviana, please,” Cade motions toward his office.
Why do I feel like I’m in trouble?
“Cade, I’m sorry.” I finally say, unable to hold it in.
“We’ll discuss everything in my office. Please, come in,” he replies, his voice calm but firm. I hesitate for a moment. “Avi, please. I won’t hurt you.”
I know he won’t, but why do I still feel the overwhelming urge to turn and run? The room suddenly feels like it’s spinning, and I start to feel like I’m on a tilt-a-whirl.
“Avi, deep breath. Come on, come back to me,” his voice cuts through my panic, and his hand softly grips mine. The electricity from his touch is enough to snap me back to reality.
“I’m sorry, Cade.”
“Aviana, what did I say about apologizing?”
“I’m so—” I catch myself mid-apology. “Got it.” I manage a slight smile, forcing myself to step forward and sit in the chair across from his desk.
“Now, because we seemed to have missed some of our sessions, I have moved your schedule around to make up for those and I informed Dr. Carter you will attend the later group hike. Unfortunately, things come up, and there are just some things we can’t control. But I want to talk about that—about you taking control.”
“I already know how to take control,” I say firmly, crossing my arms.
Cade exhales, his gaze steady but unyielding. “No, Aviana, you think you do. But shutting down isn’t control—it’s avoidance.”
My jaw tightens. “That’s not true.”
“It is,” he counters, his voice calm but firm. “When you talk about your past, you dissociate. Your mind takes you somewhere else because facing it feels impossible. That’s not control. That’s survival.”
I look away, heat creeping up my neck. He’s wrong. He has to be.
“I’ve got some homework for you,” he continues. “And before you argue, it’s not about proving me wrong. It’s about proving to yourself that you don’t have to run from this.”
“Right now, I would like to talk more about Maverick. We started to talk about him in the last session.” He has his pen at the ready for notes. “I need more information from you, Aviana. A friend of mine is a detective and I want to pass him any and all information you can provide. Your details will stay private, of course, but Maverick needs to pay for what he did. You were just a child.”
“So was he!” I snap. “He wasn’t an adult, like Mr. Widlow. There’s nothing you can do about it now, Cade. Maverick is in the past, and that’s where he’ll stay. He doesn’t even know where I am. We haven’t spoken since I was escorted out of that hell.”
“I don’t want to upset you, Avi. I just think it would help you to go into more detail. This will help you process the trauma you went through.”
After grumbling about being pulled from yoga early, I decided to let it go. Cade isn’t the bad guy here, so he doesn’t deserve my attitude. I started to open up to him about the nightmares I’ve been having—the things I endured with Maverick for a couple of months before we were caught and I was escorted out of the house by Ms. Calley.
***
Past
Age 13
After Maverick raped me on his birthday, he couldn’t get enough. He was consumed. Obsessed. Possessive in a way that twisted everything, until it was all about him. He needed me to be with him, to choose him over hanging out with Brynn, and I let it happen. Brynn didn’t get it. She couldn’t understand why I was always with him, why I pulled away from her. But how could I tell her? How could I explain the suffocating hold he had on me? She wouldn’t get it. Not after she blamed me for wanting that kiss from Maverick when she was the one who had a thing for him first. She’d never understand.
But today? Today was different. The air was thick, charged, like something huge was just on the edge of happening. Something big. Something I couldn’t predict, but I could feel it.
Maverick’s voice cut through my thoughts, telling me to meet him in the shed. I tried to protest, I tried to tell him I didn’t want to today. But then his hands were on me—gripping my arm so tight, a force I couldn’t escape. It was like he owned me in that moment, dragging me through the house as if I didn’t even matter. He almost got caught by Eloise.
“Maverick, why are you being so rough with your sister? Let go of her.” Eloise’s voice was sharp with concern, but it wasn’t enough.
“She’s fine, Mrs. Dillard. We’re just eager to start a project you asked of us. We’ll slow down, won’t we, Avi?” His smirk twisted into something darker, more dangerous.
“I’m sorry, Eloise. We didn’t mean to run through the house. We’ll be more careful,” I stammered, trying to sound calm, normal, even as the fear clawed at my throat. “Maverick, I can walk on my own.”
“Okay, dear. Just be back inside for dinner, alright?” Eloise said, her tone warm but oblivious.
“Yes, ma’am,” we answered in unison. Before I could react, Maverick grabbed my wrist, pulling me outside, across the backyard, and into the shed.
The door slammed shut behind us, sealing me in with him.
“Thank you for not giving us away,” he murmured, his voice laced with something possessive. “For protecting our love.”
A bitter laugh escaped me before I could stop it. “Love?” My voice trembled, disbelief and anger tangling together. “What we have isn’t love, Maverick.”
The slap across my cheek was sudden, sharp, stinging with the cruel force of his anger. And just like that, I was thrown back into the past and tears welled up, sliding down my face without mercy.
“I would watch that mouth of yours. Better yet, I got something to keep it busy.” he remarks as he grabs me by my hair and shoves me down to the mattress in the shed and with his free hand, he unbuttons his jeans and frees his already erect cock.
“Open that filthy mouth of yours” and when I try to refuse, he shoves his cock passed my lips. “Now do what you do best and suck it. Get it nice and wet so I can shove it into that tight pussy of yours.”
After I gag a few times, he takes his cock out of my mouth and slaps me in the face with it. With the hand still holding my hair, he shoves me face first into the mattress. When I try to protest, he pulls my head back and says, “I dare you to scream. I will tell them that you wanted this and that you came onto me.”
The tears won’t stop spilling. I can’t get in trouble again. I don’t want to be here with Maverick but what will Ms. Calley think if I get sent away, again? There isn’t anything else do but take what he is giving me. With my face shoved back into the mattress, he yanks down my pants taking my panties with them.
“Mmm look how wet you got for me just by sucking on my cock. You really are a bitch in heat, huh? You really want this. I knew you enjoyed it.” and with that he shoves his cock in with one thrust. I yelp with how intrusive and painful it was. It felt like the first time all over again .
His thrusts speed up, “cum on my cock, I need to feel you explode all over me.”
Just as he was about to finish, I heard a sharp inhale and a soft voice scream “What in tarnation is happening here? Maverick? Aviana?” It was Eloise. She came to find us for dinner. I didn’t realize how long we had been out here.
I turn to face her and I think she realizes that I didn’t want this. My face is red and I have tears and snot covering the entirety of it.
“Maverick, get the hell away from her, NOW!” Her voice is no longer soft and angelic but more like a whip, sharp with fury. “Gideon, get your ass out here, NOW. Gideon!!!”
I can barely process what's happening, but before I can even react, Maverick is ripped off me, faster than when he tore me out of the house. And there he is, his pants barely up, standing in the middle of the storm he caused. Gideon doesn’t waste a second, grabbing Maverick by the collar and throwing him across the yard like a ragdoll.
“Boy, what the hell is wrong with you?” Gideon’s voice is raw, filled with disgust and rage. “What did you do to her? Eloise, get her upstairs. Bathe her. I’ll deal with this piece of shit.”
Eloise’s shocked gasp rips through the air, her eyes wide with disbelief. “Gideon!” she shrieks, horrified by his words.
“Do. As. I. SAY. Eloise,” Gideon snaps, his voice cold and commanding, his eyes burning with an anger that could set the house on fire. “NOW!!!”