Chapter 38
Oliver
“Careful, Dad,” Dean scolded as Lee bumped his wheelchair over the threshold into the house.
“Get your feet out of the way before I run them over.”
I stifled a laugh. Watching them together was the highlight of my week. Even though Dean looked a hell of a lot like his dad, he acted just like his mom. He was a worrier. A helicopter, if you will. He wanted to control everything, thinking of all the terrible directions things could go in.
When his dad got out of the car, Dean practically summoned that wheelchair out of nothing before Lee could take a step. He tried to push him in it, but that hadn’t gone well. Lee had spun around and tried to ram him in the ankles.
“Dean,” I said. He met my eyes with his lips pursed. “I think he’s fine.”
“Listen to Oli,” Lee called as he rolled into the living room. Once he was there, he stood and transferred himself into what I would call a ‘dad chair.’ I needed one immediately.
Lee could walk just fine, but with his brain injury, he got sudden bouts of dizziness. If his migraines hit, he could lose his balance or be hit with a severe aura. It was safer for him to use the chair to move around, even though he clearly despised the thing.
“I heard Dean’s going to cook for you,” I noted as I sat on the couch. “He makes a mean jerk chicken, you know.”
“Does it taste better to insult the chicken?” He laughed at his own joke, which just made it funnier to me.
“Can’t be worse than cutting off its breasts.”
“Ain’t that the truth. You’re a good sport, Oli. My kids are too serious sometimes.”
“Where’d they get that from?”
He leaned forward, dropping his voice conspiratorially. “Father-in-law. He was a grumpy old fart.”
“I heard that,” Teresa called from another room.
“You’ve said the same thing.”
“But he was my dad. I’m allowed.”
“And he made me help him move an entire trailer-full of bricks into his backyard before he’d agree to let me marry you. He would’ve dragged it out more if I didn’t tell him he was a bit of a bastard.”
Teresa laughed as she joined us. Her chair was close enough to his that they held hands between them. It brought a smile to my face as I watched them go back and forth, trading verbal blows that had no power behind them.
Dean sat next to me, and I immediately reached for him. Before I got far, I remembered that we hadn’t discussed our relationship with his family. Casually, I went for my phone instead. Crossing my legs, I started scrolling on social media, even though I hated everything about it.
The doorbell rang, but when Teresa started to get up, I jumped to my feet. “Please, relax. I’ve got it.”
“You’re too sweet. Dean, where’d you find him?”
I smiled as I heard him tell her about Mr. Pritchard’s class. He sounded so relaxed while he talked about me. It was a far cry from his standoffish weirdness when we first started interacting.
When I opened the door, I found a small guy with a beret. That was interesting.
“Delivery for a Lee Kennedy,” he announced. The dude had some NPC energy, like the mailman in Zelda.
“Do I need to sign?” I asked.
He just passed it to me and shook his head. Without another word, he jogged down the sidewalk toward a little van. There were no windows in the back, and I could imagine there being some people tied up in there.
Shuddering, I returned to the living room. I examined the fancy box, wondering what was inside. It wasn’t sturdy or heavy, and it was tied up with orange and blue ribbon.
“Delivery,” I said when I rounded the corner.
“Oh!” Teresa jumped to her feet with wide eyes. “I’m not expecting anything.”
“That’s because it’s not for you.” I winked at her before I handed it to Lee.
She sat on the edge of her seat while she watched him untie the ribbon.
“These are Knicks colors,” he noted with a twinkle in his eye. “I bet it’s from Dan.”
He popped the top, then pulled out a little box of chocolates. With a conspiratorial look, he tucked them off to the side, then narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Dean, who snorted at the threat.
Settling beside him again, I slipped my hand between both of our legs and played with the seam of his jeans. He leaned back, putting his arm over the back of the couch without touching me. Still, it was comforting just feeling it behind me, like it was some guardian above my shoulder.
Teresa’s gaze found mine. For a second, I felt a flutter of anxiety, but then she smiled and refocused on her husband.
Maybe she knew. It didn’t really matter to me, and Dean wasn’t trying all that hard to hide it. It was his decision when he wanted to say anything, so I’d just go with the flow.
“It’s from Dr. Matteo,” Lee said as he read the card from inside.
The contentment I felt shattered at the mention of him. I shifted in my seat, glancing between Mr. and Mrs. Kennedy warily.
“What’s the card say?” Blake asked from the doorway.
Lee perched it between his fingers and cleared his throat. “‘Dear Mr. Kennedy.’” He chuckled. “Gonna have to get him to stop that shit.”
“It’s professional,” Teresa scolded.
“Yeah, yeah. ‘I was devastated to hear about your accident. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts. Teresa has already become an invaluable part of our practice, and we’re lucky to have her with us. Take as much time as you need to rest and recover. Wishing you strength and healing.’”
The world around me seemed to teeter as I listened. I continued to look between Lee and Teresa, feeling my heart rate spike.
Up until this point, I hadn’t been worried about it.
I actually hadn’t thought of it for a while.
They were happy with her new job, and from the conversation Dean had with them over the phone, I knew she was exactly where she belonged.
But if they knew the truth, that she hadn’t gotten that job by pure luck, would they be angry?
Would she feel violated because I’d meddled in something so personal, something that I had no right to?
The tips of Dean’s fingers dropped to the back of my neck. I leaned back further, relishing that touch. Every time I felt his eyes on me, I kept mine on the package Lee was holding.
“Oh my god!” he exclaimed when he opened a yellow envelope. I jumped, but Dean’s touch soothed me. “Tickets to the Knicks.”
Teresa gasped. “No, he didn’t!”
Lee laughed and rocked his chair. “I might have to have a few more accidents before the season ends.”
She smacked his arm, but there was still a smile on her face.
They were happy, I reminded myself. I hadn’t done anything bad. This was exactly what I’d wanted for them, before Dean and I had been anything more than roommates.
Still, as I watched Blake crouch next to his dad to check out what he’d gotten, something unexpected struck me. I’d never felt it, but I knew what it was immediately.
Loss—not present, but impending. I felt afraid, not for myself, per se, but for what I’d found myself in the middle of.
For the second time in my life, I felt like I really belonged somewhere. It hadn’t been very long, but the truth was that much more visceral. I could lose this just as quickly as I’d found it.
It didn’t feel fair, although I had no right to think that. I’d made the decision to get involved, even knowing that Dean might be angry.
I tried to decide if it was best for me to tell him or let things unfold as they were meant to. Maybe it would never come up. But then I’d have a secret.
As illogical as it was, I found myself torn as that vision Dean had painted for me started to crumble. The roof didn’t get fixed; it continued to deteriorate until the entire house flooded, rotting away the floors entirely and ripping the front door from its frame.
Could a good deed end in such tragedy?
Remi would probably laugh if I told him I’d gone job hunting for Dean’s mom before the guy even liked me all that much. Maybe this was more of a tragicomedy.
“You’re tense,” Dean said quietly.
I swallowed hard, trying to force a smile. “I feel sort of nauseous.”
“Oh. Do you need something?”
Blake looked over at us, and his eyes narrowed slightly. It felt like an accusation, stark and cold. Maybe this was why he didn’t like me. Did he know something?
I shook my head and got to my feet abruptly. Everyone looked at me, which only intensified the churning in my stomach. My skin prickled as a cold sweat broke out on my neck, beneath my hair that now felt too warm.
Beyond the sense of belonging, I was bombarded by the weight of expectation. Too many new feelings all at once. I couldn’t . . .
“Excuse me,” I blurted.
Blake’s dark eyes were the last thing I saw before I darted out of the room.
I thought about heading to the bathroom, but I didn’t want to be stuck in there.
Once I closed Dean’s door, I sat on the edge of the bed and dropped my head into my hands.
They shook, and I pulled them back, staring at the tremors.
What the hell was this?
I was in unfamiliar territory. Despite all my years of imagining what it’d be like to have a family, I wasn’t prepared. Not one bit.
I’d given up on this dream. That was the kicker. It had been more than a decade since I let myself hope for anything. It was me and Remi, sort of separate but the closest thing to family either of us would ever have.
Then Dean came along.
I wouldn’t lose him, even if this made him angry. I’d figure it out, just like I did everything in my life.
When I did decide to tell him, we’d talk about it and we’d get through it. It would be up to him if he told his parents. This was his family, not mine, and that meant I had to tread lightly.
Good thing I was an expert at walking on eggshells in houses that didn’t belong to me.