Chapter 12 #5
Drug? The word hit me with a delay, like my brain hadn’t caught up to what my ears had just heard. Drug? My head snapped toward Austin, and if looks could kill, Seren might have dropped right there on his polished entryway floor.
“Yeah,” Austin bit out, his arms falling away from me completely, the sudden loss of contact jarring.
“I told her. I told her enough. About Holden. About how I knew him before I met her.” Understanding rushed in at his explanation, fast and unwelcome.
“The better question,” Austin continued, his tone sharp as he turned to Seren, “is what the fuck you’re doing here.
You said Zane was picking you up.” There was still annoyance in his voice, but it was already fading.
Softening. And I had the distinct feeling that Austin couldn’t stay mad at Seren even if he genuinely wanted to. Even if she deserved it.
“Yeah, but I wanted to—uh,” Seren rolled her lips together, hesitating.
Despite myself, her beauty still caught me off guard.
“I wanted to get the update firsthand.” Austin and Seren exchanged a look.
One I couldn’t quite decode. Something unspoken passed between them before Seren finally turned toward me, her smile lighting up her face like it had always lived there.
“Hi, Blair,” she said gently. “I swear I didn’t know you were coming. If I had, I would’ve left. I came over last night to watch Grey’s Anatomy with Austin, and he was worried about…” She trailed off, giving me a knowing look. “Well. You know by now, I’m sure.”
Her words surprised me—not because she’d been here with Austin. From the way he talked about her, that part didn’t feel strange at all. What surprised me was the image her words conjured. Austin. Watching Grey’s Anatomy.
“You like—” I started, amusement slipping into my voice as I looked at him.
“She makes me,” Austin cut in immediately, scowling.
“He loves it,” Seren laughed. “Don’t listen to him, Blair. He’s a huge softie. I swear he’s cried during, like, three episodes already.”
“Can you shut the fuck up?” Austin snapped, but it was too late. Seren and I were already laughing.
“You know,” I said lightly, “somehow I can actually imagine it.” Austin’s face flushed, genuine embarrassment blooming across his features for the first time since I’d met him. It caught me off guard. I smiled before I could stop myself.
“Alright, alright,” he shook his head. “Seren, can you leave? I’m trying to make Yellow some breakfast.”
“No.” Her word came out fast. Firm. It startled me. “I mean,” Seren added quickly, glancing at me like she realized I didn’t really know her yet, “I can if you want, Blair. But maybe we could… I don’t know. Get to know each other? I’ve been asking Austin to let us hang out since he met you.”
“You have?” I asked, surprised despite myself. I wasn’t sure why it caught me off guard. Seren felt so… elevated. Polished. The idea that she’d wanted to know me felt strange in a way I couldn’t quite explain.
“Of course,” she smiled, and it wasn’t the polite kind. It was warm. Real. “Austin is a huge part of my life. And he likes you so much that I already know I will too.”
“Oh,” I breathed, the word leaving me softly. My eyes drifted to Austin without thinking. He didn’t look embarrassed. Or defensive. If anything, he looked… proud.
“Don’t feel pressured to say yes, Yellow,” Austin said, clearly misreading my glance as a silent plea for backup. “I know she doesn’t hear the word no often, but she can take it.”
Seren scoffed. “Rude.” The ease between them made something twist gently in my chest. It reminded me of Holden and me when we were younger. Before things changed. Before he disappeared into something I couldn’t follow.
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s fine. I’d like to get to know you too, Seren.”
“Really?” Her face lit up instantly, genuine excitement softening her features.
And again, I wondered why it meant so much to her.
She didn’t wait for anything else. Seren crossed the space in a rush, her dark hair swinging as she grabbed my arm and tugged me toward the couch.
She spared Austin only a second’s glance as she moved.
“Austin! Make us those bacon sandwiches,” she called out. “The ones with avocado!”
“Seren,” he said her name slowly, like she was a child who’d forgotten basic manners.
She froze, then looked back at me, embarrassment flashing across her face. “Sorry,” she smiled sheepishly. “What do you want? He’s actually a really good cook. He can make pretty much anything.”
“That sounds perfect,” I laughed, already finding their dynamic weirdly comforting. Austin muttered something under his breath as he headed toward the kitchen, but I didn’t catch it.
Seren was already talking to me, and I found myself leaning in, curious, open—ready. “So, Blair,” Seren began, her hand still looped loosely around my forearm. “I can call you that, right? Austin always calls you Yellow…”
I laughed at the confusion on her face, wondering why he’d never explained it to her. “Yeah, call me Blair,” I said. “I honestly don’t know why he calls me Yellow. I mean, I was wearing a yellow dress the night we met… well. The second night we met.”
“You know yellow is his favorite color,” she raised her eyebrows at me like she’d just revealed a secret.
“Yeah,” I laughed again. “He told me that.”
Seren nodded, then glanced toward the kitchen like she was checking to make sure Austin wasn’t hovering behind us. “He really likes you,” she whispered, delight written all over her face.
I nodded, unable to stop my smile. “I really like him too,” I whispered back.
“Yay,” she clapped her hands together, her voice returning to normal volume. “It’s kind of funny that you two found each other, you know. Since you knew Zane.”
“Well,” I hesitated, searching for the right words. “I didn’t really know him. I knew of him. He was really popular.”
“Was he?” Seren asked, genuinely curious. “Like, what kind of popular?”
“The stereotypical kind, I guess,” I shrugged. “Jock. Life of the party. Player.” I slipped the last word in quietly, wondering if I shouldn’t have.
But Seren didn’t flinch. If anything, she looked entertained, hanging on every word. “Sometimes I wish I’d seen him back then,” she said. “I’ve only ever known him after Henry…” Her expression softened. “You knew Henry, right? Austin said you did. I couldn’t believe him.”
“A long time ago,” I nodded. “The summer before middle school. Before he met Zane.”
“Wow,” she sighed. “What was he like? As a person? Zane’s told me about him, and Cassidy has, and O, and Gavin…” The names surprised me as she said them. It felt like two separate worlds colliding—parallel lives that had always been closer than we realized.
“He was nice,” I said. “He was… kind of like a breath of fresh air. I’ve never met anyone else like him. I don’t know if I ever will. He was so fear—”
“Fearless,” Seren said at the same time I did, nodding. “That’s exactly what Zane said too.”
“Really?” I asked, oddly comforted by that.
“Yeah,” she smiled. “How’s your brother? Austin told me he was in rehab. That he came home last night.”
I laughed, a little caught off guard. “Just how much does Austin talk about me?”
She looked at me like the answer was obvious. “Literally all the time.”
“Can you shut the hell up, Seren?” Austin’s voice cut in, startling us both. We’d forgotten he was even there.
“No,” she said immediately, reaching for one of the three plates he’d brought over.
“Just ignore her, Yellow,” Austin said, handing me a sandwich. “That’s what I try to do.” It looked incredible. Any lingering doubt I’d had about his cooking disappeared instantly.
The day unfolded easily after that. Time passed without effort, like we’d slipped into something already familiar.
Austin kept glancing between Seren and me like two of his favorite things had somehow ended up in the same room, and he couldn’t quite believe it.
Seren hadn’t been exaggerating earlier. Austin was fully invested in Grey’s Anatomy, reacting to every twist with her like it was a live event.
I was so used to existing in a world that revolved around Cherry, and only Cherry, that the comfort I felt with them caught me off guard.
Living, like my mom had said that morning.
Living in a way that didn’t orbit Holden’s addiction. And it felt good. It felt really good.
“You sure you don’t want more?” Seren asked later, after I ended up staying into the evening. She was clearing pizza boxes from the coffee table. “You barely ate your sandwich.”
“Oh,” I blinked, then glanced down at the slice in front of me.
“No, I’m fine. My mom made pancakes before Austin picked me up.
” Guilt tugged at me as she accepted the lie without question.
I caught Austin watching me from the corner of my eye, confused, searching.
Panic flickered inside me briefly. I looked away before he could see too much.
Seren was about to respond when the front door slammed open. Austin and Seren both turned, curious more than alarmed. My reaction was different. Their ease told me this wasn’t unusual.
“Austin,” Levi walked in like he owned the place. “Hey, Seren.” Then he did a double take. “And Blair.”
“What’s up, man?” Austin stood, meeting Levi in one of those complicated handshakes guys seem born knowing.
“This is perfect,” Levi grinned at me. “Because you’ll never guess who invited me to a party tonight.” He didn’t wait for us to guess. “The most beautiful fiery redhead I’ve ever seen,” he clapped his hands together like this was the highlight of his life.
“What does that have to do with us?” Austin asked as he sat back down beside me, pulling me closer to him, his hands gently combing through the loose hair on my shoulders.
“I don’t want to look like a loser in front of Cherry,” Levi said. “Come on, man. Please. Blair’s here, this is perfect.”
Austin chuckled and tilted my chin up gently so I was looking at him, but even though he seemed at ease, I could sense a hint of resistance behind his eyes. I watched him carefully, trying to figure out what that resistance meant.
“What do you think, Yellow? Should we let him embarrass himself, or should we help him out?”
“A party?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer.
“Seems like it,” he said, searching my face. I thought about my mom’s words. About living. About risk.
“Okay,” I agreed. There was a quiet voice somewhere inside me telling me not to. I ignored it. I wished I hadn’t.
I really, really wish I hadn’t.