Chapter 23 #3
My eyes met Austin’s almost instantly. He looked like the last thing he expected to see was me.
He was wearing a matching costume with Seren, which again was not surprising in the least. A dark wig sat crooked on his head, and he pulled it off quickly, like he was suddenly embarrassed by it.
I just stared at him. I took him in with everything I had.
He looked different. Older, the way I probably did too.
But lighter. Lighter than I had ever seen him.
Like he no longer carried the weight of whatever he had been dragging behind him for so many years.
Physically, he looked almost the same. Yet I could barely recognize him.
A full minute passed before he spoke. A minute that felt longer than any minute ever had before.
Then the shock softened in his eyes. His lips curved upward. And he said a single word.
“Yellow.”
And that single word was enough to light my skin on fire.
It lit my skin on fire in a way I had forgotten it could be lit.
Like my skin was made of gasoline, and those two syllables were the match.
Austin needed only to say them, and I was aflame.
After all these years. I didn’t let a sound escape my mouth as we stood there, staring at each other.
I had nothing to say. Though, in truth, I had everything to say.
I had so much to say that the thought of saying anything at all was overwhelming.
Austin was still smiling as he looked at me, but it wasn’t the smug smile he once loved to wear.
It was a smile caught in disbelief, like his mind was spinning just as fast as mine.
I wasn’t sure if I was waiting for him to speak.
He didn’t. Instead, his eyes kept moving over me, again and again, like he couldn’t afford to miss a single inch of me in this moment.
This was a moment that included no one but Austin and me.
Like the rest of the room had dissolved completely.
It was just us. We looked at each other like ghosts, but not the terrifying kind.
Like long-lost loved ones we had given up hope of ever seeing again.
And still, there was a sadness here between us.
A sadness made up of all the things that could have been, but never were.
Because of those mountains that once stood between us.
“So…” Seren’s voice was the first to crumble the invisible walls around Austin and me. I had to shake my head at the sound of it, because my brain had gone completely still.
I looked toward her, finally breaking the endless eye contact I’d been locked in with Austin.
Seren glanced sheepishly between the two of us, though mostly she was staring at him.
I could see the subtle guilt written plainly across her face.
She hadn’t told him she invited me. Just like she hadn’t told me he would be here.
“I don’t want to hear a single word out of you,” Austin said quietly, his voice low and direct, aimed only at Seren.
His eyes shifted to her at last. He looked at her blankly, and she met his stare without flinching, and I could tell she was trying not to crack a smile.
No words were spoken, but I knew better than anyone that an entire conversation passed between them anyway.
Whatever it was, it silenced her. Seren smiled to herself, shrugged, and turned back to me.
“I’m really, really happy you came, Blair,” she said gently. “I know it’s been a long time, but we really missed having you around.” Her smirk softened into something genuine as she spoke. She let her eyes flick back to Austin for just a second before giving me a small wave and turning away.
I watched her disappear into Zane’s waiting arms, their bodies finding each other like matching magnets. Like they’d always known exactly where to land.
“Yellow.” Austin’s voice pulled my eyes back to him. He was looking at me like he never wanted to look away again, and the realization sparked two opposing things inside me at once.
Hope.
And reluctance.
“I mean—” He cleared his throat, his gaze dropping briefly to my feet.
“Blair.” Still, I said nothing. “Can, uh— can we…” He stumbled over the words, and for the first time ever, Austin sounded unsure.
I had never heard him struggle like this.
“Can we talk?” he tried again, steadier now.
“I’d really like to talk. Just… catch up. ”
Still—nothing.
“Blair,” Cherry whispered beside me, her voice meant only for me. I had forgotten she was even there. “You don’t have to.” I turned to her, seeing the sympathy in her eyes. She understood. Probably better than anyone.
I could walk away. I could leave the party.
I could go to the bar with Cherry. Maybe even let a stranger kiss me on a crowded dance floor.
I could leave Austin in the past, where he’d lived for the last two years.
And nothing would change. I would wake up tomorrow without answers.
Without resolution. Exactly the way I’d always assumed my life would go.
But the longer I sat with that thought, the more I knew that wasn’t what I wanted.
“It’s okay,” I whispered back to her, watching as she tried to read me with her eyes. I knew she wouldn’t be able to, so I gave her a small nod, like I was helping her out.
“Okay,” she mouthed back, stepping away. I watched her glance toward Holden, raising her eyebrows as their eyes met.
I turned back to Austin. He looked like he was holding his breath, waiting. “Okay,” I told him.
He released a subtle breath through his nose, and the smile that followed was so immediate it startled me. It was contagious, too. I felt my own lips twitch upward before I could stop them.
“Yeah?” There was excitement in his voice, and I wasn’t sure why he wasn’t as apprehensive as I was.
“Yeah,” I nodded again. He smiled instantly, like that was exactly what he’d been hoping for. “I, um—” I glanced at Cherry, suddenly aware that I was about to abandon her at a party where she knew even fewer people than I did.
“We’re fine,” she said, jerking her head toward Holden. “Go.” Austin must have taken that as confirmation, because he stepped closer. I held my breath until he was beside me, like my body forgot it needed oxygen.
He lifted one hand, letting it hover in the space between us for a second before pulling it back and shoving it into his pocket.
I didn’t need an explanation. He felt it too, the magnets under our skin.
He’d almost placed his hand on the small of my back, guiding me the way he used to.
The way he always had, but he stopped himself.
And that, I realized, was for the best, because now, Austin and I really were strangers.
The kind of strangers who once kissed under the stars and shared our deepest secrets.
And honestly, I thought that was the worst kind of strangers possible.
He looked down at me, and I could tell by his eyes that he’d had the same realization. “Will you follow me?” he asked. “It’s a bit loud in here.”
I knew Austin wouldn’t protest if I said no.
But I didn’t need to say no, because even if we were strangers now, I had never lost trust in him.
When I nodded, he started walking. Not far ahead of me—he stayed almost right beside me.
Just enough to lead the way. I barely wondered where we were going as he opened Seren and Zane’s front door.
The noise of the party fell away as it closed behind us, leaving a sudden, noticeable silence.
He didn’t speak. He let the silence exist as he kept walking.
I still didn’t question where we were headed, though I was surprised when Austin led me down the expensive hallway and stopped at the very end.
I glanced around as he pulled out a key and opened an unassuming door in front of us.
“This is, uh… my place,” he said, pushing the door open. The irony hit me all at once.
“You live here?” I asked, following him into the well-decorated apartment. I barely took it in as he led me toward the living room.
“Yeah,” Austin said. He didn’t look anywhere but my face. He sat down on the brown leather sofa, opening his arms in an unspoken invitation. Sit.
“You really live here?” I asked again, still stunned, lowering myself into the chair across from him. A quiet laugh slipped from my mouth as he nodded.
“What’s funny?” he asked, a slight frown pulling at his lips. I shook my head, the laughter still soft in my chest.
“I live fifteen minutes from here,” I told him. Austin tilted his head, like he was struggling to comprehend what I had just said. “Fifteen minutes apart…” I started, but he finished my words for me.
“But worlds away,” he said quietly, his eyes moving over my face again. I nodded, letting my laughter fade into silence. And we looked at each other, again. Wordlessly, the weight of the moment speaking for both of us.
“Do you go to school here?” I asked, already bracing myself for the answer. It felt like nothing could surprise me at this point, though knowing Austin and I had attended the same school for the last two years might have tipped me into something irreversible.
“No,” Austin shook his head. “I don’t go to school here.
” It wasn’t the answer I expected. Still, I felt unsteady.
“Seren was here, and…” he hesitated. “I thought it would be better to start somewhere new.” I nodded, listening without fully absorbing his words.
“So I started working. Levi and I put some money together to start a company. It’s still small, he’s busy in Florida, so I do most of the work.
I guess I have a decent mind for business. ”
I nodded again. “Did you know?” I asked suddenly, unable to let the thought go.
“Did I know?” he echoed, though I was certain he understood.
“That I went to school here. That we were so close.”