Chapter Nineteen
Ava
The scent of bacon twirling with the sweet sugars of the smoothie, hitch in my throat. I exhale silently, trying to hide that Roman killing people was not a big deal as much as I outwardly hide it, I am screaming on the inside. The unpredictability of the Bratva is not anything to toy around with. Yet here I am, hoping the salivating fangs of the Bratva Beast are distracted by my sprinkles of morseled lies.
His eyes are intense and set on mine and I could have sworn when he blinked they went from black to dark brown. I stare back at him, avoiding the urge to look away as his face leans closer to mine. It is like he is pressing his fingers into my brain to dig for the truth. I could be paranoid or naive, but I feel like he could read my thoughts when he flags the cold glass onto the counter.
The clang of the full cup makes me lose his stupid fucking staring game as I cross my arms. Roman swipes up the remnants off the side and I stare in disbelief as he sucks his fingers like he did the other night.
I stay silent but the way I think about that night my skin pulses for his punishment, and my cheeks, red with embarrassment, of my want— no, my need for him.
His abs tense as he rotates the bar stool and my back against the island's edge. The conflict and absolute war of hate and want, are tearing me at the seams.
I push the smoothie away, “Do you just go around hurting others for fun?” I squint my eyes.
His hand brushes the divot where my neck meets my chest. “Do you like to always judge me, Cottontail?” He strokes slowly, ever so slowly, back and forth.
That’s rich, coming from him .
“Well… I– I don’t understand how you can live with yourself.” I inch my face away as he inches closer to mine. I feel trapped as I push my back against the island's edge, and I have no idea why I think it is a good idea to taunt him right now.
At least if he kills me Sarah will know who I was with, and she could avenge me... Well, I would hope she would.
I look for the knife in my peripherals as he looks down at me, “Tell me something, Ava.” How he folds his lower lip under his tongue makes my knees weak as panic rises to my chest. “Would you kill if it meant to provide justice to the ones they hurt? I don’t think so, and you want to know why I know this? Your softness and sweetness emanates from you. You planted that seed a long time ago in shit and mud and nurtured it. You learned how to grow into something delicate, yet can withstand the elements life throws at it. Others, like myself, let it harden them. They become the darkness that they were planted in. Consumed by the stale and wretched dankness of the below.”
“How do you know? Some of the deadliest flowers are the prettiest though, like… like the foxglove in those planters around the house,” I whisper as I look away, “You just kill for fun, it seems like.”
His mouth drags over my cheek to my ear, “It’s not any of your concern, but know this.” He plants his fists on either side of me, “I am not a good man Cottontail, you know this, but I'm not sure where the disconnect is from me killing people. It’s my job.” His hand grips my cheeks, and my lips pout as he squeezes his fingers. Heat pours into my lower abdomen as I contain my rapid breaths of arousal and fear. “But know this about me, I may not be a good man, yes, but I will kill anyone who hurts you or wants to hurt you. I am marking my territory and what is mine. You are mine, and it is my job to break you.” His low and gravelly voice confuses me.
The demand for possession is not uncommon for who they are, but as much as he says he wants to protect me from those who hurt me, he would kill me if he truly finds out why I am here. I roll my eyes as heat scorches my cheeks and my chest tightens.
“You blush so beautifully,” he says as he tightens his grip on my cheeks, “but the way your asscheek flushed red and the glorious sounds that you made with each blow, makes me think you don’t feel that I’m as vile as much as you sass about it. That you enjoy it. That you want more.”
I tug my chin away, “Oh yeah? What makes you think I enjoyed you almost throwing me out of a window?” I struggle to say as the words squeak into a question.
He isn’t wrong. Though, he believes I hate him because of my attitude, but it’s because of how they claim whatever they deem is theirs, especially workers.
The clasp of his hand tightens around my throat and the other against my waist and with little might, or struggle, he lifts me to his hips quickly. My legs wrap around him for the fear of falling to the white granite floor.
I inhale and freeze as I watch his lips. He fiercely kisses me holding the back of my head, bunching my hair in his hand. The line of his jaw dips with every shove as my exhale against his face shakes. I claw his back as he nips the healing cut on my lip.
He cradles me, setting my ass on the cold granite island counter. I compress my thighs together as my legs dangle, but the lower ache of want makes me wet as I crave the heavy pressure of him trying to break me.
His hand brushes up my side, tracing the curve of my hip. I try to keep myself from giving my want for him away, exhaling short and shallow breaths, but my legs slowly open with his every fucking stroke.
His fingers follow the crease on the top of my thigh, trailing to my core and swipes two fingers over my panties, “I love how fucking needy you are.”
Giving into my recklessness is not the current thought running through my brain, or my preservation of life apparently.
He spread my legs with his knees, crawling between them. I lay back as his bare chest meets mine. His cock is hard against my pelvis, making me groan slightly at the size of trying to take him.
He stands as he folds his arms. “What is it that you want, Cottontail?” I watch him as he waits for my response. He lowers back into me, planting one hand next to my face and the other pulling down my leggings.
I tuck my chin down, “Y..you,” I whisper.
“Say what you want and full sentences, please.” He bites my neck behind my ear, making me whimper. His breath is hot against my skin, “You like when I hurt you. Tell me what you want, Cottontail.” Basking in his painful bites, and his firm fingers on my skin as he holds my hip, I hesitate.
He was teasing me and it was working, inching me closer to the recklessness and more away from the thoughts of using him.
“I want you. I want you, Ro— ” I whisper.
“ —Good fucking girl. Now since you hate me so much, I am going to fuck you, but not with my fingers this time. Isn’t that what you want?”
The silence other than my heavy breathing and the deep rumble of his voice makes me want to hide away. Hide away from how much I want him to use me , hurt me, and make me sore even if I was going to destroy his life. I want him to destroy me into thoughtlessness as I figure out how to destroy him.
“Yes,” I say, grooving my hips into him. My eyes flutter at his huge cock, hard against me.
His eyes watch me as I hop off the counter, sliding his sweatpants down. His cock bounces erect. My eyes widen from the size of his cock and the magic-cross piercing on the head of his dick. I have never seen a cock piercing before in person, though. "You have…Your cock," I say, and immediately feel embarrassed from gawking at the size of him and his piercing. I waited for him to tell me how naive I was, but he didn't say anything back.
A groan escapes from him as he kneels, lunging his mouth into my hip dips, pushing me against the kitchen table across the room. I yell as he squeezes my outer thighs, extremely hard, pulling my flesh out slightly. The touch of someone taking a handful of me makes me feel uncomfortable. He focuses on the parts of my body that I am most self-conscious of. No other man I have been with ever paid mind to appreciate these parts of me like Roman does.
I brace my hands behind me as I incline my chin upward, closing my eyes. He lifts his head from my side, parting my knees with both hands as he runs them gradually between my thighs. His fingers are gentle and so fucking slow as they swoop under my blue thong strings.
The back of his hand is against my skin, running the string between his fingers, “These are mine too,” he says and snaps the material against my skin. He takes both hands, ripping the material from my body.
I flinch tilting back on my hips as I bite my lower lip.
He licks from my inner knee to my middle thigh, turning into a bite. I squirm from the pain as he lifts my leg over his shoulder, “Fuck, such a pretty pink pussy.” He swipes his tongue from the crease of my lower stomach and mound down to my clit, “and it tastes as sweet as you are, Cottontail,” he says against me. The act of him noticing my lower belly tenses my senses.
My breath is uneven but I let go of what I was holding onto as his tongue swipes up my slit, lapping me into his mouth. I moan as my thighs press against his ears as he circles and swirls his tongue. I arch my spine when he pulses three fingers into me and bites my clit.
I watch as he pushes my legs open, “Open up for me sweet Cottontail.”
Electric tingles drift to the tips of my fingers and toes. He interchanges between circling it and sucking me into his mouth as he pumps his fingers. His teeth bite down on my swollen clit again, edging me closer to my release. “Fuck,” I mutter. “It feels so good,” I purr in a whisper. I don't care that he knows I want this, even if it is just for right now. That twisted grin and dark eyes of his will consume me if his mouth doesn’t first.
He backs away from me, leaving me exposed and needy, but close enough that I can feel his breath,“ I love how you confess to the pain, but when you cum, your sweet, sweet pussy will be sucking mine out as well, filling you up with me.” he says as he stands, placing my leg from his shoulder to the crook of his elbow.
Fuuck
Teasing my entrance with his cock I watch as he grabs my other leg placing it in the crook of his elbow, folding me.
The way he stares at my eyes, I realize I want his pain, his pleasure, his ecstasy of destruction. He makes me want to let go, for once in my life and not be the strong one. But within his destruction, I feel safe.
Roman:
She is so beautiful sitting there with her pussy soaking for me, and as much as I want to leave her needy for not telling me why she is here, I can’t. Everything about her is mine including her pussy, and I want her to know it and no matter what happens my cock will be the last one in her perfection.
As I slide the head of my cock to her opening She whimpers, “Ro— .”
I cut her off as I plunge into her, talking her through it as she whimpers. “That’s it, open up for me.”
One of her hands braces behind her as she lifts her sweater to her chest with the other. She groans with frustration, straining to take it off. I lift her leg over my shoulder as I pull my cock out and plunge into her again. I drag the sweater over her head, tossing it to the side. She cries out, folding both arms behind her bracing herself on her forearms.
“Fuck, you are taking all of me like a good fucking girl. When you say my name it will be when I make you cum and only when I make you cum, understood?”
She nods her head as she moans, “Ye—yes.” Her beautiful tits bounce in her black bra with every thrust against her.
I lean over, planting my hand beside her as I fold over her and lift my elbow outward, spreading her wider. Her other knee bends slightly outward as her ankle rests on my neck and I force my hand around her throat as she cries out.
Fuck she feels so good.
Ava:
I threw my head to the side slightly from how tight he was choking me. The thickness of his cock glides over my g-spot and his piercing feels so good inside me. I tense my body at the intense feeling and I would probably jolt away if I wasn’t pinned down.
His mouth crashes into mine as he releases my throat and I gasp for air. My mind buzzes as my eyes roll back from how much I enjoy that. Airy whimpers from my lips part into his as he bites my lower lip. As he leans away, he spits into my mouth as he reaches for my clit between us, circling and entrancing me. His spit dribbles down my chin as I lick it from my lips. Inching his face closer to mine, he watches it drip, satisfied as he groans out, “Look at you, drooling all over yourself with my spit, like a sweet fucking good girl.”
He removes his hand and reaches toward the smoothie, scooping out some with his fingers as he uses his teeth, dragging my bra down over one breast, exposing my nipple. He watches me as he drips the cold contents over my nipple and sucks the juice, swelling my nipple outward.
The pale stormy light barrels through the window, illuminating behind him, accentuating the creases of his defined muscles. I lay my head back as he lifts his. My cries become louder as he slams into my slickness in and out, faster and harder with every thrust. This moment is blank and whirling with fluttering light at the same time as my body heats up.
“Mmmm,” he groans. The collision of him slides me upward against the cold granite counter. I dig my nails into his back, scratching lines down, as he keeps his focus on my face. The fullness makes my arms fall to my sides as my body starts to give into letting go, tingling from my core outward.
He lifts the other leg over his shoulder as his deep bounce grinds his piercing into me, pressing his thumb on my clit, “You can now say my name, Cottontail.”
I quiver with pleasure as I say slowly, “Roman… ” His pulse against me lures my orgasm into a roll, as my body convulses into electric heat waves wrapping my nerves. He plunges deep as he releases inside of me. I constrict around him into a pulse as his growl of pleasure takes a hold. Not afraid to show how much he enjoys me. My body. Being with me.
“Good, good fucking girl.” He praises with glazed eyes. “Look at you doing so good, cumming on my cock.”
The electricity fizzles slowly, and my breath rapid. I ease my hand down his chest tracing his tattoos. He grips my hips and heaves them up slightly with a rumble of a groan, and he slowly slips outward from me. Come immediately pools between my legs, intertwining him and I into a slick mess. I lift myself on my forearms, leaving my legs open, as he takes a step back and stands. He is watching me, crossing one arm over the other, holding it against his body as the come spills from my pussy.
Bending down, he picks up my leggings and places them next to me, giving me a kiss on the top of my thigh. As he grabs his sweats and steps into them, he straightens as he slants his head to the side, looking at me with heavy eyes. To tear me down, pick me up, and tear me down again until I am nothing, and I hate that I love it.
I yank my sweater from behind me and unravel the sleeves quickly to put it on, embarrassed at the thought, as he walks to the large double sink. By the time my pullover is on, he is standing there with a wet rag.
“One thing is,” he spreads my legs and wipes me between my thighs, “You will feel me throughout the day, and every time you do you will think about the real reason you are here.” His deep voice instantly made my lower warm again.
Fuck. Can’t there be two reasons? I don’t even fucking know anymore. I don’t think I would have ever even thought about either reasons before the other day.
I hop off the table and pick up my leggings. I am awkward as I nod, not sure what to even say right now. Fumbling with the silky black pants, I slip them over my hips with a bounce to my waist. He has that part of me now and knows I enjoyed it, even though his glare was something I've never experienced with anyone else. To break.
In the library, he knew I liked it, but now he made me want it. There is a conflicting feeling of if I can use this to my advantage to take him down with the Bratva, or if there was a way to spare him. I couldn’t believe I was even questioning if I should spare this killer. Instant guilt gripped my throat, drying my tongue into sandpaper.
Despite the chaos of this tug-of-war in me, there was some sort of beauty. It was unexpected, tucked away in the thrill of the forbidden. I hoped that I would use it for my revenge in the end, but who was I kidding?
Though, with pleasure there is pain, even for Roman.